The war for our kids' attention is being waged, and we’re losing. That’s my cynical summary of so many experts who study such things. When it comes to screen science, I’ve attended the lectures, seen the documentaries, read the books, gone to parent meetups, and flipped through the studies. I’ve been through it personally with my high schooler — hooked, caught in dangerous situations, experiencing mental health crises thanks to the online world. My third-grader is phone-free and blissfully unaware (well, he loves Tears of the Kingdom, but that seems downright educational these days), but I still work so hard to get ahead of it.

I’ve signed the Wait Until 8th pledge, I’m working on ways for the kids to be more independent (both commute to school themselves!), and we talk about screen time an annoying amount. Hell, I’ve helped to start and run a PTA committee whose purpose is to look critically at screen time and help foster independence in kids. There’s a lot of movement. And yet, it feels like parents are American revolutionaries in 1773. We’re dumping tea into the harbor and an impossibly well-funded army is coming to get us.

This past week I took the fight overseas. I had the pleasure of talking with Kaitlyn Regehr, Ph.D., a researcher and professor of digital humanities at University College London and author of Smartphone Nation, out now. The tagline of the book is spot on: “Building Digital Boundaries When Offline Isn't an Option.” It’s a go-to book that’s informative, but not overly complex, exhaustive, but surprisingly short and to the point, and lacking in the shame that so many screen time books put on parents. I can't recommend it enough.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity

I'd love to start with the idea of digital pyramids, if that's OK. Like the food pyramid, it can be a really helpful guide to how we and our kids should consume media. Would you mind just walking us through that idea?

I think the idea of healthy eating is something we understand. The food pyramid, similar to the digital diet pyramid, is weighted with the good nutritious things at the bottom and the not-so-good things, the things that we want to limit, at the top. We might not always choose to follow it. We might sometimes eat a tub of ice cream, but we are aware that we are making that choice. I think what the digital diet pyramid does is it allows people and parents, most particularly, to think about the choices that they are constantly making every time they open a screen. Generally, what we want to do if we want a healthy relationship to screens is we want to be thinking about active, educational, informative, healthy socialization as forming the base of that pyramid. And then farther up the top are things like passive consumption, doom scrolling, short-form, low-quality content that we want to mitigate or moderate to a certain degree.

In the digital pyramid, where do you place movies and cinematic video games? I think, these days, a kid who can watch a full movie or pay attention to hours of plot in one of those cinematic video games kind of has a leg up. Do you agree?

Right. So you are talking about long-form content versus short-form content and how that relates to the development of attention spans and the ability to follow full narratives through. Absolutely, not all screen time is created equal. What we want to be doing, where possible, is, of course, running around outside is normally better, but if you are going to use screens, we want that screen time to ideally be long-form engagement, like good quality movies, where possible, interactive engagement and collective viewing.

“Generally, the bigger the screen and the longer the content, the better.”

So particularly with young children, ideally, you are sitting there with them watching a Julie Andrews movie talking about the content, using it as a springboard for their discussion. If it takes place during World War II, maybe that is a discussion point for you to talk a little bit about history and use the viewing as a jumping-off point for education and for communication. That's where we really want to be with screen consumption, if we are going to be using those screens. Generally, the bigger the screen and the longer the content, the better.

So Mary Poppins over Roblox, that's my takeaway from this.

Definitely, yes.

I appreciate how Smartphone Nation repeats the idea that screens aren't all bad and that the concept of “screen time” can shame parents for turning to screens ever. I think your book is a nice counterpoint to The Anxious Generation’s Jonathan Haidt, which primarily argues that taking away phones and getting kids outside is the answer. You note that being digitally native isn't all bad. So my question for you is, if screen time limits aren't the answer, where should we start?

First, let's talk about where screen time comes from as a concept. Screen time, that guidance came out of some pretty good physical health research, mostly around childhood obesity and childhood diabetes from about 15 years ago. What that research said was, "If kids are sedentary, if they are sitting in front of screens all the time, they aren't moving around, that's bad for their physical health." That is still true. And Jonathan Haidt's argument around that is true. If you are in front of screens, you're not moving around, and that's not good for your physical health and aspects of your mental health, and I absolutely agree with that. But that guidance really just captured the quantity of the screen consumption, and not the quality of the screen consumption. So that guidance is limiting in that it doesn't address the mental health implications of what kids might be consuming on screens.

As we discussed previously, it's a very different scenario to have a kid watching with their parents Mary Poppins than for them to be alone in their bedroom with headphones on, scrolling through an algorithmically-driven feed. That is qualitatively a very different experience. The sad thing is that a Pew research study has recently pointed out that 89% of kids from the age of 5 are on YouTube now, an algorithmically driven, largely unregulated platform, and I think it's about 81% from the age of 3. Now, most of the discussions that we have at the moment around algorithms, around social media, completely leave out those younger years, and they tend to leave YouTube out of that discussion. But really for a lot of us, well-meaning parents, without realizing it, we're actually grooming our kids into these algorithmically-driven short-form, often low-quality content, from a really early age. So what we need to get to grips of is that not all screen time is equal and that we're actually needing to make an active choice.

“That's not to say that we weren't plopped in front of screens to watch hours of content with bad-quality TV dinners (we were), but … you weren't watching 10 episodes of Bluey in a row.”

Fortunately, there are many more choices available to us as parents than our parents had to make. That's not to say that we weren't plopped in front of screens to watch hours of content with bad-quality TV dinners (we were), but these were different screens and it was different content. Those were largely regulated spaces, often programmed by children's commissioners who were experts in programming children's content that had a diversity of content. You weren't watching 10 episodes of Bluey in a row. Those regulated spaces that a lot of good advocacy went into in order to develop, if we think of the development of children's programming on PBS, unfortunately, a lot of that good work has been thrown out the window because those kids are not on those spaces anymore, they're on YouTube, and that is a great tragedy.

I think it's really important as parents that we remind ourselves that we are making choices. But because we are making choices, we can make different choices and we can make empowered decisions about the types of screens and the types of digital spaces we want our kids to inhabit. There's great empowerment in that I think.

You just mentioned how even Bluey could be problematic, which I've actually never thought about. It is a really good point. If you give the kid the control or you let it auto-rotate and do eight in a row, Bluey is a completely different experience. Whereas, usually, it's the safest possible space for parents with young kids.

I'm not saying that Bluey is problematic. It's not problematic. What is problematic is allowing a binge watching of an entire season. We actually should be having diversity of content. There are great things about curated spaces, and there are great things about children's programming that has carefully thought through what comes after what and that there's some kind of host that comes in and makes sense of things for kids. Terrestrial TV is a very different experience. When I speak to my kids who are still very little about healthy screen consumption, I talk about terrestrial TV. I talk about algorithms and the fact that algorithms make our choices for us. It's important that we're active in our decision-making and that there are experts and, in the post-truth world, it's worth acknowledging, that there are some people that curate viewing experiences and these are regulated spaces. That means that that's a different experience so that there are healthy forms of screen consumption and less healthy forms of screen consumption.

Now, that is not to say that running around outside is still a much better thing to do. Of course, it is. But if you are going to use a screen, it's good to be much more intentional about how you do it.

If I can move to a slightly older audience. I have a teen myself, so I think about this all the time. How do I stop my kid from getting red-pilled?

When we talk about online extremism or the echo chambers that our kids or our uncles or ourselves might be in, I think it's really important to take a step back and think about the technological processes at play. The reason that young boys are often fed online misogyny or more extreme content is because it is more attention-grabbing. The reason that girls are fed body dysmorphic content and self-harm is because it's more attention-grabbing. The financial structures of social media are an attention economy. The whole system is set up to hold our attention as long as possible and, in fact, hold our attention a little longer each time. Unfortunately, that often means that hate, harm, and disinformation are often algorithmically prioritized because they are more attention-grabbing, because disinformation is often more attention-grabbing than truth.

One of the best things we can do, and we absolutely should be doing this with teenagers, is talking about that concept, talking about the attention economy, talking about the way in which we are manipulated through social media, and our usage and our behaviors online are collected in order to manipulate us, just to hold us a little bit longer. If you talk to kids about this idea, even from early teenage years, they don't like it. They don't like the idea of being emotionally manipulated and controlled. One thing that I talk about with any type of echo chamber is instead of fighting or debating your teenager or uncle at Thanksgiving dinner around the specificity of the issue, around the granular detail. It's better to take a step back, collectivize, and talk about the ways in which these technological and corporate structures are feeding them this content and pushing them potentially down a narrower and narrower path.

And then it becomes you together against those structures, and that becomes a very powerful thing. One, you are equipping your young person with tools to be empowered digital citizens, and, two, it's something you're in together because you yourself are not immune to it and you are probably being fed something different, but it may be something that makes you feel bad.

This one's for parents of neurodivergent kids. It seems that we are getting pulled in two directions. On one hand, social media is more dangerous. One study you cited said that the likelihood of seeing self-harm content is, tell me if I'm getting this right, 40% greater for those with mental health difficulties, 31% greater for kids with autism. On the other hand, you also write that evidence suggests that screens can provide predictability and a sense of belonging within like-minded communities and can be instrumental in helping neurodiverse kids manage anxiety. Can you please walk us through this?

I think this goes back to this idea of quality consumption and the choices that we make around our screens. That work around social media-fed harm or algorithmically-prioritized harm and the way in which neurodiverse kids are disproportionately targeted is immensely problematic, and, if you have a neurodiverse child, something you should be aware of. That is not unique to neurodiverse children. Social media is very, very good at predicting our behaviors, but also at knowing our vulnerabilities because it is through those vulnerabilities that it can point out [what we] lack and we are more susceptible to buying things if we feel a lack. That fits into this business model. The work that has been done around the way in which screens can support neurodiversity tends to be around ways in which screens can be used to calm kids, ways in which different learning applications can support neurodiverse kids, and that there are ways in which differently abled kids might find community through the internet. That remains true and those are good things, but of course we're almost talking about different usages of screens. That stuff is not happening on TikTok in the same way. It just really isn't.

A lot of the discussions that we used to have around the beauty of social media a decade ago and the way it gave platforms for speaking voice and finding community has shifted as the technology has become more and more sophisticated and more and more manipulative. When we talk about that good stuff, we really need to be careful about how we're carving out those spaces, what screens we're using to do them, and where those screens are being used.

In another sense, keep kids away from the algorithms.

Yeah. For younger teenagers, I tend to find that algorithmically driven content is more and more problematic. As these systems become more and more sophisticated, they will be able to hold our kids' eyeballs longer and longer and longer, and we have to push back against that.

“Most things have to be proven safe before they hit the market. For social media, the opposite has been true.”

It's hard to do forever, of course, even if we hold off social media until they are 16. That birthday will come, and they will turn 17. What we want to be doing is preparing our kids. Just like you would teach them how to drive, you would prepare them and you would talk to them about the dangers and you would talk about how to use it safely.

Hear, hear. You acknowledge throughout this book that so much falls on parents that shouldn't, that the dark recesses of this online culture we're fighting is not our fault, but it is the fault of corporate profits and lack of regulation. What do you say to us burned-out and angry parents? I wonder, you seem so pragmatic, are you angry at all at this world?

Yes, absolutely. I am like an angry mama bear, but I do think that there is power in that anger too and I think a movement is starting. I am hopeful, because if there is enough of us that are angry, we will see change because policy follows the public will. But I do acknowledge that, at the moment, so much is heaped on individual responsibility in a way we don't have for anything else. We're used to consumer protections. We're used to consumer protections around the food we eat, the medication we take, the cars we drive, the small parts on kids' toys so they don't choke. We are used to being protected, and we're not being protected in this space and our kids are not being protected in this space. There is a newness in that. Most things have to be proven safe before they hit the market. For social media, the opposite has been true.

Now, unfortunately, that means that the duty of care and the responsibility is currently falling on us as parents. So while we wait for regulation, while we wait for greater corporate responsibility, we need to know that if our kids are going to inhabit this space, they're doing so without seat belts, and that's why we need to educate ourselves as parents. We need to do that work. I think that doesn't make it our fault. This is not our fault, but we do need to learn these things or else our kids will be forced to navigate it alone.

On the flip side, how do we fight? How should we join the movement? What's your advice for those of us who want the anger to spill out in the public space?

This is why this book is not written in the way that other books are, which is often from a mental health perspective. That's not my expertise. I operate in the digital space. I'm talking about how these technological processes work so that you yourself can be informed about them and you can push back against it. I think if enough people understand that, if enough people read this book, they will say, "This is crazy. This is totally crazy that we've allowed this to happen," and that's when you will see policy change because, ultimately, that's how democracy works. If you think of really successful grassroots movements, it is because people inform themselves and they think it's no longer acceptable.

In a New York Time ideas story that ran this past week, Jia Lynn Yang opens with a bang: “One of the more bewildering aspects of the already high-stress endeavor of 21st-century American parenting is that at some point your child is likely to be identified with a psychiatric diagnosis of one kind or another. Many exist in a gray zone that previous generations of parents never encountered.”

For those with tweens and teens, this might seem obvious. For those with younger ones, buckle up.

In Yang’s story, she focuses on the role schools play. Failures in education may lead to an increase of psychiatric diagnoses like ADHD — alongside IEPs or maybe medications — as a means to catch up kids who are being lost in crowded, test-reliant, merit-funded schools. Of course, even Yang points out that schools are only one part of the puzzle. There’s screens and social media taking over our emotional lives and psychiatric development; the pandemic’s long-felt chilling effect on socialization; the adult world of division and anger in politics and everywhere else; and of course changes within the Mental Health Industrial Complex.

It’s this last piece that Dr. Sami Timimi, a child and adolescent psychiatrist and psychotherapist at the National Health Service in the United Kingdom is focused on. He's the author of six books including Naughty Boys: Anti-Social Behavior, ADHD, and the Role of Culture and his most recent book, Searching for Normal, which promises to outline a new approach to understanding mental health, distress and neurodiversity. There little doubt we could use some advice here — and a bit of demystification around the mental health crises that seems to have taken over childhood.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

I frankly found Searching for Normal to be a difficult book. The science and ideas are very clearly laid out, but you're throwing a lot of stones systemically and culturally that are not often cast. As a layperson and a parent with a house filled with diagnoses, medications, cultural shame, and lots of doubts about our mental health journey, the paralysis you describe feels very close to home. Given all this, I'm wondering, big picture, what is the main takeaway you'd want a parent to walk away with from your book?

Dr. Sami Timimi: It is a difficult read because we have a public narrative that's been around for a while that's really created a mythology around what we think of in terms of mental health and behavioral difference. My main message is that what we are calling psychiatric diagnosis aren't really diagnoses. And be careful where the culture of diagnoses might lead you to, because we have so much evidence now that the way we're approaching mental health has resulted in something called the treatment prevention paradox, where at a population level we're seeing increasing prevalence of mental conditions and mental health diagnoses. At the same time we're seeing an increasing number of people accessing various types of treatments associated with these diagnoses.

But we're not seeing an improvement in the outcomes. If we saw an improvement in the outcomes, we would expect at least a stabilization and hopefully a reduction in prevalence of certain conditions because they would be being effectively treated. I don't think there's actually much disagreement with this in most of the academic literature on what's going on because mental health does seem to be an outlier compared to we've seen a lot of progress in physical health.

For example, when I was a kid, if I got leukemia, my chances of survival into adulthood was around 20%. Now it's around 80%. So this is what happens when you have approaches that are built on technical knowledge that allows you to understand what's going on and make specific treatments for it. But it seems to be the case in mental health that we're going in the wrong direction. What are the assumptions that go missing when we approach mental health as if it's physical health? Because we have to remember, there's no brain scan for ADHD, there's no blood test for anxiety. You can't examine a thought under a microscope. And it becomes difficult to sit in that area of uncertainty and curiosity.

You talk about the TikTok contagion of health disorders and you cite the, I think it was 2023 research about Canadian teen girls presenting with a variety of self-described disorders that are all relatively rare. I'm wondering if you can describe the phenomenon and then I wonder, what does it change for parents on the ground? We have to take their thoughts seriously, no?

Yeah, that's a difficult one, isn't it? It's interesting because I heard about this research from a colleague and friend of mine who's a psychiatrist in Canada who shared this paper and it happened just at the point where I was seeing that in my clinical work as well, I was seeing young people who were brought by their parents, parents very worried, with presentations that are generally considered to be quite rare presentations. So, for example, I saw a number of kids who were coming and saying that they had these Tourette's symptoms but they had no history of it. It's like it suddenly emerged.

It is hard because first of all, I don't blame social media for causing these things because actually a lot of this is narratives that's been suggested and started out. The bigger phenomena are these influencers who say that they have ADHD or autism or anxiety and they publicize it online and they talk about things that are signs of potentially having these conditions. And we have to remember, growing up is tough. Try to remember what I was like as a 13, 14-year-old — it is a struggle. There's a lot of changes going on.

“What social media is doing is a kind of a social contagion. It's turbocharging these ideas and spreading them out.”

You're in a phase of your life where you're seeking meaning and you're seeking belonging and you're involved in those existential type of scenarios where you're trying to figure out where do I fit in? What's my life all about? And so what's been happening is because they watch a lot of these things online with a lot of the influencers just taking up concepts that have been given to them by certain branches of academic psychiatry. And so what social media is doing is a kind of a social contagion. It's turbocharging these ideas and spreading them out.

This goes alongside a trend that's been happening in parenting.

I think a lot of parents have lost their trust that they know what they're doing. I think a lot of parents have lost their confidence. They feel the need to go to see a professional to try and understand. And it's difficult when a lot of the professionals are also involved in what I call the Mental Health Industrial Complex. This is how they get paid, this is how they earn a living.

“Don't be scared of your children. Don't be scared of their intense emotions and don't be scared of conflict. “

And so one of the things that I do encourage parents to do is don't be scared of your children. Don't be scared of their intense emotions and don't be scared of conflict. Conflict happens. What has I think happened as we've exported the knowledge base to professionals is we've also developed a curious form of something that some people refer to as cognitive parenting. I know the concept of helicopter parenting, cognitive parenting is a little bit different where you try to reason things through, where you treat your children as if they're already developed adults.

So what role should parents take?

If you don't think this is good for your children, tell them. If you want to put some boundaries around them, don't be afraid of their conflicts.

I liken it a little bit to a referee in, well, for us it's a soccer match. Whenever they, say, blow the whistle that there's a foul committed, the offending team that you've blown the whistle for will complain. That's what happens.

The crowd will complain as well and say the referee is biased and so on. So when you are a rule enforcer, one way to think about it is you're not going to get any good feedback. You're always going to get protests. You have to ride that out. But a good referee delivers the consequence. The consequence is usually fairly short, it's fairly immediate. Don't delay the consequences because you don't say, well, I've seen you doing that foul, but the next match you have, if you do that again, then the next match you have, I'm going to give this or that. Whatever consequence it is, immediate, short-lived, doesn't have to be long. Just something that shows that you disapprove and this is not allowed.

“When you are a rule enforcer, one way to think about it is you're not going to get any good feedback. You're always going to get protests.”

And the other thing you do is you don't argue with them. So in soccer matches, you have a half-time where the teams go into the dressing room for 15 minutes before coming. You don't see a referee running after the player who's committed the foul telling them, “I've seen you, I've seen you doing this in other matches. You think you're going to get away with it. You never learn, you never listen.” A good referee spots the infringement, knows that they're going to get back chatted and they're going to get flak, needs to develop a thick skin to ride that out, not rise to it and doesn't get involved in nagging them and so on. And once the consequence is delivered, it's over. Don't need to talk about it again. It's finished.

What happens when you get caught in what you call the Mental Health Industrial Complex? A quote in the book that really resonated with me, asks “What might happen if instead of shaping the treatment around diagnosis, it was put to one side and the specific challenges, fears, and context were engaged with instead?” Can you answer the question you pose? What does that exactly look like?

So one of the things, understanding that what we call psychiatric diagnoses are not actually diagnoses, they're descriptions. They're what a branch of therapy referred to as narrative therapy ...[which] basically says that our life is made up of stories. It's the stories we hear about ourselves, the stories others tell about us, and we build up a set of stories to understand ourselves. We're surrounded by narratives. And the narratives we tell ourselves have a powerful impact on how we experience our emotions.

So what I was describing there is instead of falling down the root of imagining that if you get a diagnosis you found the meaning for what it is that is going on that's troubling you, there is a different way of trying to find out what it is you're trying to achieve, what is it the difference that you're trying to make, that a diagnosis can't do. So one thing I do in my clinical life is a form of what's referred to as Socratic questioning.

“We're surrounded by narratives. And the narratives we tell ourselves have a powerful impact on how we experience our emotions.”

Let's say you got a diagnosis and it was the perfect diagnosis and you felt it fitted. What difference do you imagine this is going to make to your life? What difference is that going to make to your life?

A diagnosis in a sense is an abstract thing. It doesn't really tell you specifically materially what's going on in your world. Is it that actually you're having trouble with friendships? Is it that your family is under stress and you're under stress because you think your parents are about to split up? Is it that you're finding yourself out of your depth at school? So you're trying to get to the specifics of what it is that people are wanting to see change in their life.

Right. Keep questioning the outcomes and ideas. I really like this tool for parents.

And the other thing is I'm trying to help people move past the idea that experiencing intense emotions is a sign that there's something wrong in them. Experiencing intense emotions is something that we all have to go through. If we don't go through it, we have less of a chance to develop psychologically.

“All life involves struggle and suffering at some level. How can we know joy if we don't know sadness? It's impossible.”

In a sense, the role of parents is to be careful about saving your children from struggle and suffering because that is an unrealistic goal. All life involves struggle and suffering at some level. How can we know joy if we don't know sadness? It's impossible.

You say this is the most pathologized generation ever. Given that, do you have a checklist for parents to look through and say, is my child being pathologized?

That's an interesting question. I may be averse to the whole concept of checklists, partly because in understanding that all our definitions of mental health are subjective. So our understanding of what is and isn't a kind of looming problem that needs some sort of professional intervention. There is no formula that will allow you to figure this one out. It's going to have to be situation, person and family specific.

One thing I say to parents is, look, all good parents feel guilty. That's just a given. I cannot help you with that. Whatever I do, whatever anybody does, you'll carry on feeling guilty or worry, have I done too much of this? Have I interviewed too little? Have I given too much advice? Have I given the wrong? That's what good parents do. Be careful about that guilt driving you to do too much. And I think that's now a bigger danger than the opposite. So we end up intervening perhaps unnecessarily without holding our own anxiety and our own guilt. So one of my little messages is don't try too hard.

On that note, what do you do with the big feelings in a household? How do you let issues not get carried away?

So one of the things that I try to work with with families is understanding, I use the metaphor of a dance, that there's emotional flow going between people and that emotional flow defines how that relationship works. And sometimes what happens is that anger becomes the dominant way in which connection happens.

The other thing I think about in terms of emotions, I think of emotions as being viral. You catch the emotions of the person closest to you. If your kid is angry with you, it's very hard not to get angry back at them. So kind of developing an awareness of that emotional flow of how it's working in your particular relationship and developing an understanding that that has become a dance.

For example, I know there was a period in my own kid's life where there was a lot of tension, a lot of sibling rivalry to the point where our son and daughter were getting physical and losing temper. And we thought, me and my wife thought only one of them would survive in childhood. That's what it felt like to us.

Anyway, so I thought, okay, well I have to try and do something about this. So I started writing little post-its at the end of each day, just a few, a sentence or two about things that I liked that happened and I just stuck it above their bed before they went to bed.

After a couple of weeks of doing this, my daughter said to me, "Dad, you're being weird." And I said, "What do you mean I'm being weird?"

"Why do you keep putting these post-its and saying these nice things?" I said, "Okay, do you like it?"

"Yeah."

So just something also a bit playful a bit, but it's just about trying to refine that emotional connection somewhere other than what's become the defining dance.

A little bit of, “all you need is love.” And I think you had it at the top of one of your chapters, quoting Confucius.

Exactly. The journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step.

Will it take a zombie apocalypse to fix masculinity? The thought occurred to me as I sat in a theater taking in Danny Boyle’s 28 Years Later the other day. This intense, gory, nudity-laden flick was also one of a surprisingly heartwarming journey for a young boy, Spike, who doesn’t buy into his community’s view of the world. Everyone around him is fearful, incurious, and readily accepts convenient and clear falsehoods about their lives. Spike seeks hope, even if it requires him to face the violent, cruel, and potentially fatal real world off his island.

I won’t spoil too much in the way of the plot but I will say that the way the story speaks to masculinity — wading through lost men, toxic lies, and not-so-symbolic alpha males (in the form of one truly terrifying zombie) — is thoughtful and fresh. In context of the cultural landscape for boys and men today, it’s the kind of exploration we could really use.

Two months ago, Scott Galloway, a professor of marketing at NYU and media tour de force affectionately known on his podcast as Prof G, took to The View to talk, as he does so often, about masculinity.

“I like the idea of restoring an aspirational vision of masculinity,” he said to a room that seemed, a bit surprisingly, in total agreement. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with leaning into your femininity or masculinity if it feels natural.”

In his view, this vision of masculinity involves three pillars: provider, procreator, and protector.

When it comes to the provider, “every man at the outset of his career should take economic responsibility for his household. Sometimes that means getting out of the way” of your more successful partner, he says, and other times it means stepping up. For procreation, he says we should channel “that fire of desire… the right ways [to] make you a better man — kinder, stronger, thinking about how you dress … showering, for God’s sake.”

Finally, he says that in an aspirational vision of masculinity, “your default operating system is protection.” This is a more gentle and empathetic pillar than it might sound on its face. “A lot of women don’t feel safe on the subway,” he explains, “or they see men walking down the street, they cross the sidewalk.” This is due to men eschewing their duty as protector. And “it’s not just physical,” he continues. “When you see a group being demonized, your default setting as a man is you move to protection.”

In 28 Years Later, Spike found himself chasing this view of masculinity headlong: providing the health care his mom needed that his dad would not, protecting her from zombies and himself from indoctrination, not exactly chasing procreation (he’s 12) but rejecting his father’s philandering example. The fact that he lives in a post-apocalyptic landscape in many senses brings clarity to his vision. When there are no worldly comforts, moral clarity arises.

Danny Boyle and Prof G have this in common: They’re both speaking to the broadest possible audiences about things that so many men primarily discuss with, well, other men. With 28 Years Later raking in over $100 million at the box office already and The View’s audience being, well, The View’s audience, it’s refreshing to see such discussion spilling out into the public.

Masculinity is making a comeback. It’s time to talk about it.

Does anyone have a truly healthy relationship with their phone?

I don’t see much evidence of it out there. Personally, the phone is undeniably useful but still feels like a foreign object in my hand — a feeling that was brought into stark relief the second my kids were old enough to pick up a screen. To them, a tablet or phone offers an enticing, comforting, and even productive space. Not healthy, exactly, but familiar. For me, it’s alien — and ground zero for a cultural battle against brain rot, attention loss, and reality itself. Phones stress me out.

I ran into a much needed perspective on this dilemma in a long, thoughtful essay by Karl Ove Knausgaard, the brilliant Norwegian writer with an uncanny ability to see the world as it is, in meticulous detail. My struggle, as he helped me to see, comes from those most influential years in my life — the years before the smartphone. “To understand a man, you have to know what was happening in the world when he was twenty, Napoleon is supposed to have said,” writes Knausgaard in Harper’s Magazine. “The quotation is probably apocryphal, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true.”

My Napoleonic prime was in the 2000s — shortly after the advent of Facebook, but right before the iPhone was in everyone’s hands. For Knausgaard, who is 56 years old, the internet barely existed in his twenties. He admits that he has been ignoring the fundamental influences of such technological advances since. “Not once in those forty years have I turned my attention to technology and tried to understand it,” Knausgaard writes, “how it works in itself, how it works in me. It’s as if I had moved to a foreign country and not bothered to learn its language, as if I am content with not understanding what is happening around me and just settling for my own little world. This lately feels like serious neglect.”

This resonates. While I spend considerable time trying to understand and control the impacts of screen time on my kids' developing brains, I hardly pay attention to my own use. What am I doing when I check for emails, Slack messages, and texts with lab rat-like repetition, or scroll Reddit News and The New York Times at every down moment, or get lost in Instagram and YouTube rabbit holes? More importantly, what should I do about it?

Knausgaard found his technological insight by heading out to Athens, Greece to talk to James Bridle, an author and artist with a specialty in nonhuman ways of thinking (and what orangutans can teach us about politics). In a sense, Bridle sees technology as getting in the way of experience. Sounding like a free range parenting proselytizer, he says that “the only thing you can do is experience it and do it yourself. You have to do it, you have to experience it, it has to happen to you. Bodily, physically — because you’re part of the world.”

Bridle takes this deeper, offering the example of an ancient Eleusinian cult in which initiates were led into a dark room, shown a “whirlwind of impressions, without anyone telling them what they were seeing or what it meant” and being left to interpret that on their own. The next year, they were shown the initiation from the outside, “and you could say that only then, when the gaze from within was complemented by the gaze from without, was the initiation completed.”

This metaphor for the digital world made it all click for me. We’re all too often inside looking at the whirlwind of the internet with little control and understanding. There are more of us now trying to step outside of this world — to see the puppet masters at play in order to walk away from it all.

We’re not going back to 2006, that innocent year before the iPhone was introduced. And I don’t think that should be the goal. The technology that has been introduced since my childhood is incredible, powerful, and a big piece of human progress. But it’s no replacement for the real world lessons I get when I put down the phone and experience life, unfiltered.

On a tip from a savvy movie critic, I took my 7-year-old out to see his second ever Marvel movie the other day (he's a big fan of Norse mythology so he's seen Thor: Ragnarok and sorta liked it). We sat back, donning our 3D glasses (he was very into the novelty of this) and took in The Fantastic Four: First Steps. What a pleasant surprise. The movie is, in fact, as my movie critic colleague promised, The Best Marvel Movie for Families.

For the kids, there’s a lot to love. There are the action montages, a bright retro futuristic setting, a visual style that is gee-whiz superhero cool, but in a comic way — shiny and light and not over the top. The movie is just more palatable for kids than most other Marvel movies, emotionally and cognitively. The superheroes are relatable as family but they also play the part of role models well, interacting with and caring deeply about the public they serve. The villain, too, is not so much motivated by evil but by an unstoppable appetite (for planets, granted) that he is actively trying to rid himself of. A little sympathy goes a long way to take the teeth out of a monster. But most importantly there’s Franklin, the baby.

The Fantastic Four are a family and have arguments and issues that are familiar to all kids. One big one is the strain (and joys) that having a baby puts on, well, everyone. I especially loved seeing Reed Richards and Sue Storm, superheroes with doctorates who no doubt have seen their share of sleep debt, complain about tiredness. Even genius superheroes can’t face the superheroic task that is getting baby to bed. It’s a tension that gets the screen time it deserves. Just ask any parent.

Sleep has been on my mind a lot lately. I always thought that I would crush sleep once my baby grew up, but some 6 years later I realize maybe it wasn’t the baby? I’ve never met someone who doesn’t have a tenuous relationship with sleep. When I was in physical prime either during my senior high school years as a soccer player and middle distant runner or during my marathon-happy thirties, I slept so very soundly. At least that’s how I remember it.

Now that I’m older I juggle more — so much more — work out a little less and do a lot more staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night. With age, I maybe need to admit, I need an assist.

I’ve only just started to give sleep tracking a fair shake. I’ve been pairing up a new Samsung Galaxy 8 watch with a Samsung Galaxy Ring (I’ve been a Samsung man since I converted to their Flip phone, which pairs seamlessly together, requiring no third-party apps).

So what have I found? That data is in fact motivating. I won’t get too into the weeds but I will tell you that late night snacks, screens, night caps, and work are bad for my sleep. Evening walks, reading, and days with lighter fare and more quality workouts lead to more quality sleep.

It’s all fairly obvious stuff, but what the tracking does is force the attention. Good sleep matters and is, for those of us without babies, a fairly controllable thing. We can create habits that help sleep. We can choose to prioritize our health and well being. Stats don’t tell us what to do, but they do show what our current priorities.

When my son was a sleepless baby (he really was the worst) the only two priorities I had were to keep him healthy (alive) and to find sleep. My world is a little easier now and my list of priorities has grown immensely. I want to be outdoors more, to find new fitness, to take on new passions (birding is kind of fun, everyone), to embrace a new phase of marriage, to learn new skills, and meet my kids where they are. But sometimes you have to remember the basics. Without good sleep, everything is more difficult. Only a superhero can defeat the eater of worlds on a new parent’s sleep schedule. The rest of us need all the help we can get.

Labor day is upon us and as I celebrate the ending of the chaotic mess that is summer for parents, I also can’t help but feel a little wistful. Did I make the most of the summer? Or, more to the point, have I made lasting memories for my kids?

The answer to that, I think, is yes. But the memories are not found in volumes of ice cream, the rides at the county fair, the hours of pool time and picnics, or the (shockingly expensive) songs and bonding they had at camps. I believe that in the long term these simple joys will become part of a happy and balanced childhood, but they’re not the kind of thing they look back on and say, “remember when …?”

The “remember when” moments are a different kind of fun — Type 2 fun.

As former Fatherly editor Julia Holmes explained in her wonderful essay on memory and adventures, there are varying levels of fun. “The ‘fun scale,’” she writes, “which first circulated in climbing books and media in the 1980s, divides outdoor recreation into three major categories. At one end of the scale is Type 1: You expect to enjoy yourself and you do (a day at the beach). At the other end of the scale is Type 3: not even remotely fun, catastrophically bad, something never to be repeated (shipwrecked). Somewhere between those extremes is the perfect fun, the kind of fun that pushes you past yourself and (hopefully) delivers you back to yourself in better condition — stronger, happier, full of fresh gratitude for comfort and company.”

Type 2 fun is the stuff of memories. When we tell a great story about travel or adventure — one that’s worth retelling throughout life — there is usually an edge to it. There are barriers overcome, there is a sketchy or frightening moment, there are lessons learned.

I think about Type 2 fun all the time. As a distance runner and cyclist and outdoors person who remembers the first time they got hypothermia fondly (it’s a good story!), I embrace such “fun” and try to bring my kids into it. As a dad, I know that summers, with the kids out of school and the weather cooperating is a great time to go after it.

So, as we stare down Labor Day, I wonder to myself, how’d I do?

This summer, if you are to look at my 8-year-old’s skinned knees, I think some memories were made. We daily took to the trails and roads and pump track to bike. There were falls, tears, and an awesome amount of getting back on the bike with a chin held high. One of his favorite stories to tell was actually from last summer when we were mountain biking together, attached, tandem-style. It was hot, buggy, and we had already had a minor crash (or two) along the rocky trail. At one point, there was a ledge that required you to walk your bike, single file, over a small cliff. I asked my son to go to the other side and wait, the better for him to watch as I awkwardly pushed the long tandem bike along the thin ledge, lost my balance and, rather than fall 20 feet to the forest floor, tossed the bike and leaned into the rock. I steadied myself as the bike crashed below. Thirty minutes later, we had were back up top and on the trail again — with a story to tell.

For my older child, I might have gone a little hard on the Type 2 fun this summer. I offered to pick up my teen and their best friend from overnight camp and take them on their first real backpacking trip this year. I marked the maps, packed the food, and neatly stored our tents, stoves, water purifiers, headlamps, and sleeping bags for a three-night, four day trip on The Long Trail in Vermont. The more serious ascent was to happen on day 1, leaving the rest of the trip for a rolling hike, out and back, to give them a pleasant taste for one of my favorite pastimes.

The Gods of Type 2 fun had other plans. First of all, the parking lot on the map simply wasn’t where it should have been, so we wound our way through country roads to the next lot, miles away and downhill from the planned start. In the new parking lot, a sign informed us that a shelter had moved a few miles further. The short of it: A good hike became a formidable trek. Three days, 18.34 miles, and 4,698 feet (up!) later, the kids refused to camp a third night in the woods, demanding to hike straight to the car and go get a hotel. We did just that. I stopped for milkshakes on the way, but somehow, years from now, I don’t think the truck stop shakes are what they’re going to remember about their time on The Long Trail.

This weekend, I think I’m going to take the family to Coney Island. The kids will grab hot dogs, we’ll all ride on the Wonder Wheel, walk down the beach and share the breeze. We’ve made enough memories this summer — and everyone needs a little forgettable fun too.

The time when kids go back to school is full of hope and excitement. It can also be a time of nervousness and apprehension. And, for as long as most people can remember, one of the greatest ways to cure the blues, for kids and adults, is to read a good book.

Not all great back-to-school books have to be specifically about school or jitters. But sometimes that kind of thing helps. From Pre-K kiddos to high schoolers, here’s a selection of great books that will help kids feel calmer, brighter, and more confident about heading back to the classroom.

Amelia Bedelia's First Day of School

You might remember Amelia Bedelia as a bumbling housekeeper, but her more recent adventures as a younger woman are great for young ones. This picture book contains some of the same wordplay of the old books, with a great message.

Age: Pre-K, Kindergarten, and 1st Grade

Why Do I Have to Go to School?

This board book is part of Usborne’s “Very First Questions and Answers” series and, as such, addresses the basic question of why school, or some form of education and structure, is important. Neither pandering nor confusing, this book is literally designed to explain the concept to very young school-age ones. The talking points here take some of the guesswork out of a parent’s speech, so you may want to read it quickly to yourself before sharing with your kid.

Ages: Pre-K and Kindergarten.

Clementine’s Great Big UH OHs

This sweet picture book isn’t about school specifically at all. But it is a book about how kids can plan for and manage their disappointments. The titular mouse, Clementine, worries about all sorts of things going wrong. But, the key lesson here is to plan for “Uh Ohs.” Great for parents who have anxious kids or children who feel like everything has to be perfect.

Ages: Pre-K, Kindergarten, and 1st Grade.

The Dory Fantasmagory series

As first chapter books go, Abby Hanlon’s brilliant Dory Fantasmagory books are really without any peers. Hilarious, heartfelt, and easily readable for kids just starting chapter books, the Dory books don’t just make kids feel better about being kids; the books actually capture the hilarious nature of little kid logic.

All of Dory’s adventures are good for back-to-school jitters, but the second book, The Real True Friend, is perhaps the best primer for meeting new kids and trying to fit in.

Ages: 1st grade and up.

Superfudge

Judy Blume’s immortal book is technically the third in a series that began with Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing. Focused on the trials and tribulations of 5th and 6th graders, and their changing feelings toward the world, this book has only gotten better since 1980. The humor and realism still work, over 40 years later, and the analog nature of this very recent past can be nothing but positive for modern kids.

Ages: Late Elementary school and Middle School

Choose Your Own Adventure (New Covers!)

That’s right, the classic Choose Your Own Adventure books are back. And now, with new, slick covers for the 2020s. Why are these good for back-to-school? As nuts as some of the classic Choose Your Own Adventure books are, the thing that makes these stories so great for emerging readers is the fact that it’s totally okay to fail.

The bite-sized adventures are also great for kids who think that they don’t enjoy reading. These books are modern classics for the specific reason that kids feel like they’re in control.

Ages: Second grade and up.

Wings of Fire Series

Imagine a series sort of like Harry Potter, but instead of humans, you’re following a bunch of talking dragons. That might not fully represent Wings of Fire, but it does give you a sense of the appeal of this series. With different dragon characters that every kid can identify with, Wings of Fire is a truly inclusive series, which is impressive since most of the characters are fire-breathing reptiles.

Ages: 4th grade, and up.

Olympians graphic novel series

Sometimes the best way to educate kids about the classics is to barely disguise the classics at all. The brilliant thing about George O’Connor’s Olympians graphic novel books is that these are fairly straightforward takes on classic Greek mythology. Middle-grade kids will love the awesome illustrations, but they’ll also be way ahead in history class.

Ages: 4th grade, 5th and up.

Wildwood series

The story of siblings finding a secret world within a normal city has become an instant classic since 2012. Not exactly coded for back-to-school, middle-grade or early middle-school kids should read the Wildwood series for one reason: Other bookworm kids will have probably read these books, too.

Ages: 5th grade, 6th grade, or Middle-School

New Kid

A graphic novel from author and illustrator Jerry Craft, New Kid is perhaps the perfect contemporary back-to-school book for older kids. Focused on a 7th grader named Jordan Banks, the book is all about feeling like an outsider, relative to both class and race. A good point of view for all kinds of kids.

If your kid likes this one, there are others in the series, including Class Act and School Trip.

Ages: Middle School and High School

Sunrise on the Reaping (Hunger Games series)

Yes, after all these years, Suzanne Collins' Hunger Games universe is still relevant and great for older kids. The newest 2025 book, Sunrise on the Reaping, is the second in the Hunger Games prequels series that began with The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes in 2020. In some ways, these prequels are better than the classic Hunger Games books. But if your kiddos get hooked, the other books are waiting for them after they finish the new ones.

Ages: High School

The Complete Collected Poems of Maya Angelou

Sometimes tweens and teens need a little bit of inspiration. And that comfort and inspiration don’t always have to come in the form of narratives. Instead, why not turn to the poetry of one of the greats? Every kid who has ever had a deep feeling about something will relate to at least one of Maya Angelou’s poems. And, in terms of centering oneself before the stress of back-to-school, nobody touches the soul quite like Angelou.

Ages: Middle School and High School

Allowing your child to have access to the entire Internet without restriction or supervision would be like setting them loose in the middle of Lagos. Not a good idea, and not a safe bet. And while the Internet can be the perfect place to watch harmless cat videos, research bottomless databases for school reports, and play games that educate and entertain them, it’s also a place where phishing, social network harassment, and scams abound. That’s why it’s up to you to educate your children about what’s safe and what’s not — and to know what to keep an eye on for yourself.

Talk About Cyberbullying

According to Wired Safety — a leading online safety, education, and help organization — cyberbullying begins to expand by age eight. And from there it reaches far and wide, with 43 percent of teens aged 13 to 17 reporting that they have experienced some sort of cyberbullying in the past year. Help your child learn how to deal with cyberbullies (and how to not become one) by having them “graduate” from the Carnegie Cyber Academy — an interactive educational tool developed by Carnegie Mellon University to teach proper Web etiquette and how to defend yourself from “Cyber Villains.”

Set Limits

No matter what age your child is, setting boundaries with the Internet is imperative. The types of websites your kids visit, the search engines they use, and the content they have access to should all play into the restrictions and limitations you set on your devices and through your Internet provider. Enough Is Enough compiled a list of kid-safe search engines that are more reliable than a Google Safe Search. Additionally, most cable and Internet providers, such as XFinity and Comcast allow you to block websites by URL, keyword, and device accessing them. If that’s not enough, there are services such as The Children’s Internet that offer children safe, age-appropriate Internet experience available for a monthly fee. If you do allow your child to use a mobile device, then use a kid-friendly mobile device.

Don’t Save Any Lessons For Later

From the first time you log on with your kids, utilize every opportunity to promote safe practices and open dialogue about the Internet. According to Enough Is Enough — a non-partisan, non-profit organization that has been a national leader in Internet safety legislation and education since 1994 — by the age of five, kids are very capable of using computers and phones to access the Internet. At this age, they also “accept media content at face value,” meaning that it’s the perfect opportunity for you to teach them what to avoid and how to avoid it online. Teach kids from this age to never click on ads or sidebars, how to create a username and password that is safe, what information is safe to share online, and basic privacy practices. Watch this Internet Safety video at BrainPOP Jr. together and talk about the lessons it teaches.

Teach You Kids to Treat the Internet Like “The Real World”

A good lesson to instill in children is to be as cautious and careful on the Internet as they are in real life. Challenge them to ask themselves, “Would I tell this or act like this to a stranger in person?” and, “Would I be comfortable with this if a responsible adult were looking over my shoulder?” This allows children to acknowledge that everyone is a person behind the computer screen.

Supervise the Screens

Just because you have restrictions or blocks on devices doesn’t mean that you don’t have to keep an eye on your children’s activity online. Enough Is Enough encourages families to keep all devices in shared or open space in the home — such as the living room. Make sure you know who your child is communicating with online, as well as their online history.

Internet Safety For Kids: A Cheat Sheet

• On average, teens spend 5 hours and 38 minutes online every day.
• This list of search engines includes sites that are safe for kids of all ages to use.
• Teach your kids to interact online with the same care and caution you have taught them to use every day in the “real world.”
• Kids are very capable of using computers and phones to access the Internet by the age of five.
• Utilize your device and service provider to block inappropriate websites, keywords, and search returns.
• Keep communication and dialogue about Internet use and safety open with kids.

Before Fred Rogers slipped on his shoes and a cardigan, he was a young theology student attending the University of Pittsburgh in the 1950s. There, he studied under developmental psychologist Margaret McFarland, who would end up inspiring, influencing, and actively molding Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. To say the show would not have been without McFarland is an understatement. Over the course of three decades, Rogers and McFarland met to discuss psychology, upcoming scripts, songs, and of course, children, on a weekly and sometimes daily basis, and her wisdom is imprinted all over the neighborhood.

McFarland was already a large figure in child psychology before ever meeting Fred Rogers. After receiving her doctorate from Columbia and teaching in Melbourne, Australia, McFarland returned to Pittsburgh in 1953 and co-founded the Arsenal Family and Children’s Center with Dr. Benjamin Spock, famous for his studies on child development, and renowned psychologist Erik Erikson, known for coining the eight stages of development and the term “identity crisis.”

Unlike Spock and Erikson, McFarland kept a very low profile throughout her career and wrote very little about her teaching philosophies outside of her dissertation and a single journal article on “development of motherliness.” But her legacy has lived on through her students, Rogers chief among them, and the core tenet of what she taught should sound familiar, even if their origin is not.

1. Anything human is mentionable, and anything mentionable is manageable.

When Fred first began his study of child development at Pitt, McFarland help him get in touch with his own childhood memories and feelings. When doing this, she would repeatedly use the phrase, “Anything human is mentionable, and anything mentionable is manageable.” Simply put, it is OK to experience hard feelings openly, and more importantly, when people do this, they find healthier ways to cope. This theme comes up over and over again in Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, like when Mister Rogers taught kids about how to get mad without hurting anyone, and feel many other complex feelings. It made for a catchy song and a crucial lesson in emotional intelligence, but like many of Roger’s great ideas, it started with McFarland in the classroom.

2. Attitudes aren’t taught — they’re caught.

In a 2003 interview with the National Endowment for the Humanities, David McCullough boiled down McFarland’s worldview: “What she taught, in essence, is that attitudes aren’t taught, they’re caught. If the attitude of the teacher toward the material is positive, enthusiastic, committed, and excited, the students get that.”

Rogers recalled favorite examples of McFarland putting this into practice in Stuart Omans’ and Maurice O’Sullivan’s book, Shakespeare Plays the Classroom. She had a well-known sculptor from Carnegie Mellon University come to Arsenal but told him not to teach, but to simply be excited about clay in front of the kids.

“And that’s what he did. He came once a week for a whole term, sat with the 4- and 5-year-olds as they played, and he ‘loved’ his clay in front of them,” Rogers said. “The children caught his enthusiasm for it, and that’s what mattered. So, like most good things, ‘teaching’ has to do with honesty.”

3. Learning depends on love.

McFarland championed a teaching philosophy based on love and compassion. Her friend and colleague Rev. Douglas Nowicki remembers that, “For her, learning could only take place in the context of love. She believed that if a child doesn’t sense that the teacher cares for him or her, then that child will not be able to learn very much.”

Love is perhaps one of the most important supporting characters in Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, more than Mr. McFeely and Daniel Tiger. There were his many ways to say “I love you” and how he always let children watching know he liked them just the way they are, not the things they wear or the way you do their hair. But love may have fallen into the background or been eclipsed by King Friday if it hadn’t been for Margaret.

4. Be an observer.

Pittsburgh play therapist Carole McNamee, one of McFarland’s students, credits her with being one of the sharpest observers. “She could just spot things. She was phenomenal that way,” McNamee shared on the podcast When Fred Met Margaret.

“I’ve never seen anything like it before or since,” Margaret Mary Kimmel, a Ph.D. professor emerita of library and information sciences at Pitt, agreed. Kimmel eventually became a consultant for Mister Rogers and taught a class called Early Childhood and Media, which McFarland helped teach and develop material for. “Margaret talked about how the child interacted with the mother. ‘Did you see her face and the baby’s face? And what about when he started to fuss? How did the mother handle it?’ I learned so much from just watching her watch and describe to the class what was going on between the mother and the baby.”

Fred Rogers may have been the star of the show, but he never wavers from letting children be the center of attention. Even though he cannot see the kids watching at home, his gentle delivery and purposeful pauses helped them feel seen anyway.

5. Look to the helpers.

During times of disaster, Rogers famously told kids to, “Look to the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” This lesson comes from his mother and not McFarland, but McFarland may have been the Platonic ideal of this. Never marrying or having children of her own, she was completely dedicated to her work and yet a uniquely humble helper. There was no ego that compelled her to take credit for a lot of the show, she loved to teach, and gave out ideas like they were warm cookies she baked and delivered to friends regularly. Rogers’ ability to turn her lessons into a successful television programs was just another sign of a job well done. Rogers’ mother taught him to look for the helpers, but it was in McFarland where he found one.

If you were to rank the most blissed-out segment in Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, you would have a monumental task ahead of you. Each show is 28 minutes of zen. But easily making it into the top five recurring warm-bath segments are the factory tours. Watching red balls take shape, pretzel dough go into the oven, the Crayola factory come to life, and a cloud of cotton getting brushed into a towel with Fred Rogers’ calm, interested voiceover makes for good television, sure, but it does so much more. These segments show the magic of work — that an object is the sum of its parts plus labor, and this process is a sight to behold. Rogers wanted to show kids that our chaotic world is an orderly place with meaning, if we just take time to look below the surface.

As an adult looking back at these segments, it’s clear to me the world just isn’t that simple anymore. Sure, the adult viewpoint complicates things (“Who’s their manager?”; “I wonder what overtime pay is like?”), But so does the world economy. Companies don’t just make a single thing anymore. For better and worse, the world just doesn’t work like that.

There’s perhaps no better example of this than in Mister Rogers’ visit to the Crayola factory. The episode, which ran on June 1, 1981, sent the team packing to Easton, Pennsylvania, to explore one of the most familiar objects for kids: the crayon. The segment begins, as most factory segments do, with Mister Rogers approaching the picture frame and a slow zoom taking us into the scene, which happened to be of a great big tanker train. From there, colorful visual flow and fade in and out as in a fever dream. This vision is mostly beside the point. The heart of the experience comes through in Rogers’ methodical language, as if he is putting the crayons together with his words:

“The train is full of hot wax. And from the tank it’s poured into a kind of big kettle with a kind of powder that makes the wax hard. After that, they put in the pigment, which is like colored flour.

This pigment is yellow, so it’s used to make yellow crayons.

Now all of that hot wax and hardener and pigment is mixed together into a kind of pouring bucket… into a mold for lots of crayons. Each little hole will be filled with the colored wax.

See how they pour that in?

That colored wax is going into all those holes. And a little later, each one of those holes will show a crayon coming up. People wait for about five minutes for the yellow wax to get hard. Then they scrape of the top which they’ll melt and use again

Now watch the crayons come into the crayon collectors.

There they are.

Look at all those yellow crayons. Handfuls of yellow crayons. It’s like a ferris wheel, isn’t it? These crayons get lots of rides.

To make up big boxes of crayons, many little boxes are put together in one big box. Then they’re all put into a big shipping box. And then people take those boxes to the stores where other people come to buy them.”

The segment, to this kid at least, was mind-blowing. It initially complicated the relationship with a familiar object, dissecting it into its essential and unfamiliar parts, before slowly bringing it back in a solid, familiar form. Out of a steaming train and molten swirling yellow liquids and people moving boxes and cylinders of wax comes crayons. This is how crayons are made. This is what work looks like. The world makes sense.

On its surface, it seems like not much has changed. The crayon-making process at Crayola is, wonderfully and surprisingly, not all that different. There’s a bit more automation. There are fewer people. But the modern-day crayon-making process (as you can see here in a 2014 video from Wired) is pretty damn similar to the one Mister Rogers showed us. It’s still visual gold. It’s hard labor. It’s how things are made.

But of course, things have changed. Some 37 years later, the world is a lot more complicated and so is this crayon factory. Crayola is still be based in Easton, Pennsylvania, but its supply chain is international, its products more complex and wide-ranging than crayons, and its core value all the muddier. The quiet essence of the yellow crayon and the crayon factory producing crayons, and the factory worker making crayons is lost.

There’s this plot twist in The Good Place, an excellent show about how to live a moral life in modern times, where, spoiler alert, the main character realizes that everyone goes to the bad place because the world is too complicated for good to exist. A good act, like ordering flowers for grandma, they propose, is complicated by the fact that those flowers have high CO2 emissions, the phone used to order them was built in a sweatshop, and the shipping company used to keep costs down is hellbent on union-busting.

Likewise, the making of yellows crayons — handfuls of yellow crayons — is complicated by modern economic forces. You can look deep into the supply chain that churns out familiar objects, but unlike in Rogers’ time, there’s no coming back to the Platonic ideal. What does Crayola manufacture? Crayons. Also, crafts, this weird springy clay stuff, animals that ooze, pricey museum-like experiences, cheap screen-based experience, slightly horrifying 5-foot-tall talking crayons, and some very colorful marketing. In other words, it’s complicated.

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Since Mister Rogers’ heyday, American goods have increasingly come from far away lands and the way they’re made in those places is simply not transparent. When you see video from, say, FoxCon, the largest manufacturer of electronics in China, it’s usually exposing human rights violations, not to showing work being done. Crayons, likewise have not gone untainted. While Pennsylvania continues to be the epicenter of crayon manufacturing in the U.S. — with 13.5 million crayons made there per day — there have been competitors from factories whose standards are not as high. A massive scandal 25 years ago, which lead to a recall of Chinese crayons that were found to have lead in them. This scandal alone slowed the tide of crayons in the American market, never sending imported crayons past the three to five percent mark in America.

Crayola is dominant in crayon-making, but it is not resting on its laurels. Like most modern companies, it has expansive intellectual property. This, logically both helps the bottom line and helps a company reach more people. In the case of Crayola, the do-it-yourself craft ethos shines through in most of its products (we’ll give the middling apps a pass) and the toys and crayons offer great entertainment for kids. But the wide variety of offerings also makes companies much more complicated to understand.

If you look at the latest products from Crayola this year, you will find a whole lot of things that don’t remotely resemble crayons. New products include: Build A Beast Dragonfly Craft Kit made of Model Magic (manufactured in China), Sprinkle Art Uni-Creatures Activity Kit, and a 2-in-1 Color Chemistry Gift Set. These are not bad toys. In fact, the Build-a-Beast line are filled with great toys that require creativity, imagination, and hands-on skills. The latest from that line even made Fatherly’s hand-picked list of the 50 Best Toys of 2019.

The point being, a Mister Rogers factory tour would look very different today. Crayola is no longer the maker of a single, well-understood product in one place that you can break down into wax, dye, and packaging. Mister Rogers would need to enter a boardroom, talk to product designers, marketers, and audience analysts to get the full picture. He’d be required to speak to why the company made the product rather than simply what parts went into the thing.

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Perhaps most confusing to kids and furthest from the Mister Rogers’ ethos, Crayola has put a lot of money into selling its factory as a destination for experiences. The Crayola Experience, a DIY museum of sorts that launched 23 years ago in Easton and has expanded to Arizona, Minnesota, Florida, and Texas, teems with smiling crayon characters on interactive screens and posters lining all the walls. There are rooms with screen-based games, “silly selfies,” melted crayon art, DIY crayon making (these are both admittedly very cool and very on-brand), and the mandatory pizza and soda and junk food you find in a kids’ museum cafeteria.

It’s an interesting place and, by all means, fun for families. But it again complicates the company. This is no longer the place where crayons are made — a point made by the fact that factory tours are not only not part of the Crayola Experience, they aren’t available to the public. From the kid’s point of view, Crayola is a place where magic happens, a place where 100-pound orange crayons drop from the sky on New Year’s Eve and melted wax spins into art. In this case, “magic” is ephemeral. As you grow older, it goes away. The magic of the Crayola Experience, unlike the magic of drawing with crayons, is lost on adults.

The truth of the matter is that a Crayola Experience is an inculcation. The smiling 5-foot talking crayons replace the smell of wax (it’s beef fat that makes it smell like that). Interactive displays and oozing clay replaces sitting down to draw. Crayola replaces crayons. Of course Crayola puts its own name over its most iconic product. After all, there are already crayons in every restaurant and home in the country — what else is there to sell there?

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I recently showed my kids (two and eight) Mister Rogers’ crayon tour, playing the segment from my phone. I prefaced it with little more than this is how crayons were made. They were attentive and quiet, watching, I imagined, in the calm repose that Rogers’ voice instills. I turned off the phone and told my older kid she had been there (we were once members at the Crayola Experience). Blank stare. I then asked if they wanted to draw. My 8-year-old declined, no doubt feeling a little old to do some coloring. The 2-year-old, ever the follower, also declined. Then he asked for “more TV!” But kid, I thought, Mister Rogers isn’t just TV. This is a man showing us how the world works. As it turns out, it is all a bit more complicated than that.

The way Fred Rogers communicated has been the subject of much examination. He was deliberate without being rigid. He was quiet without being passive. He was empathetic without being paralyzed. How did he achieve this? He worked hard at his scripts. In his archive in Pennsylvania, stacks of scribble-covered papers pay tribute to Rogers as an exacting self-editor. The printed scripts contain large words that were then carefully crossed out and replaced with more comprehensible language. After all, Mister Rogers, the titular character and de facto mayor of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, spoke mostly to coma and to the millions of children watching in their homes. He understood that they hung on his every word. But what were those words, exactly?

We know that Fred Rogers created a space of encouragement and kindness, but by examining which words he leaned on, we can learn to construct meaning and child-friendly lessons out of Mister Rogers’ rhetorical building blocks. To that end, Fatherly analyzed the closed-captioning text for 30 representative episodes of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood pulled from the 31-season run. After throwing out common words (conjunctions, articles, pronouns), we looked at the frequency of word use. The results show that Mister Rogers was not merely a calm and affirming character. He insisted on exploration and action. He demanded curiosity. And he responded to it as well.

A breakdown of Mister Rogers’ most frequently used words provides a window into a spectacularly effective communication strategy. And his top five words by usage are a great place to start.

5) “Know”

Used 457 Times

It makes sense that a cornerstone of educational children’s programming like Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood would make knowing central. To know is to be educated and to understand. But for Fred Rogers, the verb was dynamic and transactional. The knowing went both ways. Yes, he wanted his young audience to know the world through the lens of their neighborhood, but he also wanted to know his young audience.

In Mister Rogers’ world, “know” is frequently part of a question. Rogers doesn’t assume a child’s knowledge or demand that they know much of anything. But he uses knowing to pique curiosity: “Did you know…?” or “Do you know…?” has the power to draw children into discovery. The word places a primacy on the act of seeking an answer, and assures children that the world can be known. In that way, Rogers could inspire kids to be curious themselves, while also reassuring them that there was an answer to be found. Rogers is often remembered for the emotional resonance of his work, but he was not just interested in feelings. He loved to empower children with facts. The feeling of security he inspired emerged from the sense that Mister Rogers was never evasive. He wanted his audience to know what he knew.

4) Make

Used 469 Times

Many viewers of Mister Rogers Neighborhood will remember the factory visits. Viewer were often taken to various spots near the WQED studios in Pittsburgh to learn how things were made. We were given a glimpse into the process of making so we could see that the things in our homes didn’t simply appear there fully formed. There were steps in making paper, or violins or rubber balls.

Rogers loved the idea of manufacturing. In the Neighborhood of Make-Believe the puppet Cornflake S. Pecially calls himself a man that manufactures. He makes chairs. And there are often plots that revolve around Cornflakes’ chair-making factory. Cornflake was one of the first puppets Fred Rogers ever made.

But aside from showing his young viewers how things were made, Mister Rogers often invited children into his kitchen, to sit with him a the table and craft. The projects would usually involve materials found around the home — a protean form of upcycling before the term was even coined. And happily, there were rarely right ways in which to build the crafts. There was always room for creativity. The beauty was that the word “make” came to encompass both industrial processes and creative processes. The act of creation, rather than the forum in which the act took place, was the thing of interest.

3) Go

Used 609 Times

Fred Rogers was calm, measured and reassuring, yet his third most frequently used word was an exhortation to motion. One doesn’t necessarily equate Mister Rogers with action, but when you watch his episodes with the word “go” in mind, it’s suddenly clear just how restless the program is. The camera is always shifting and Mister Rogers and his viewers rarely stay in one place for too long. Again, this is very much by design. Kids do not have long attention spans. To keep his audience engaged, Rogers had to move quickly.

Consider the fact that the show begins with the act of arrival and ends with the act of leaving. Viewers don’t just happen upon Rogers sitting idly in his home.Viewers catch him between here and there. And while they’re with him, they go. Viewers go to factories and businesses. Viewers go to the Neighborhood of Make-Believe. Viewers go outside or to the kitchen.

Yes, as children, we sat at home watching. But we were watching a man being active. Mister Rogers modeled active behavior through the television — an entirely unique trick.

2) See

Used 675 Times

A close second to “go” is “see.” There’s likely a reason that the two words are used nearly the same number of times in these episodes. Because if you’re going to go, you’re also going to see. “Let’s go see … ,” is a common refrain on Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. But there’s more to “see” than the activity that happens once viewers reach their destination. Interestingly, the word “look” is used about half as much as “see” (346 times) over the same number of episodes. “Watch” is used considerably less (59 times). What’s the difference? If Rogers just wanted kids to regard something, wouldn’t these words be more likely to have similar rates of use?

Not really. Watching is passive. Looking is fairly passive. Seeing is active. When you see, you notice. When you see something, an object or an event, you’ve been able to capture and retain something of its quality. In order to know something, you have to see it. Seeing is part of learning in a way that watching is not. Fred Rogers didn’t want children to watch his show. He wanted them to see inside his house and his neighborhood.

1) Oh

Used 918 Times

At first blush this seems like a mistake. Isn’t the frequent usage of this two-letter exclamation more of a rhetorical quirk than a choice? Doubtful. It’s unlikely he would have allowed “oh” to colonize his sentence. There’s little reason to believe that “oh” was anything but a measured choice. And, once you think about it, the prevalence of “oh” begins to make sense. In fact, it feels kind of profound. The word “oh” communicates recognition and realization. It is a hook on which a conversation can hang. And Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood was a conversation.

But “oh” isn’t just an acknowledgment. It’s a declaration of wonder and surprise. “Oh” is also “Oh!” And “Oh!” is a big-hearted feeling. It can mean joy or love. It contains about as much as two letters can. In a sense, “oh” can hold the entirety of the Mister Rogers neighborhood in one fine syllable.

But when taken with the other four words in Mister Rogers top five words, “oh” becomes an exclamation for a fine life motto that someone might stencil on their wall:

Know. Make. Go. See…. Oh!

It’s Fred Rogers final command to us — learn something of the world, build something useful that lasts beyond you, move beyond the places you know, make an effort to notice the world around you and never be afraid to show your joy in it.

Know. Make. Go. See.

Oh!

What would Mister Rogers say to kids in these strange, difficult, and uncertain times? It can be hard to grasp how a child’s mind works: I’m often thrown by the way my 3-year-old makes logical leaps that are alternatingly brilliant and disjointed, with wild emotions, good and bad, clouding her perception of the world. It can be hard to know what to do with all those knotted feelings and ideas, especially in times of universal stress, with all normalcy temporarily knocked down by the coronavirus pandemic.

How can we talk to our kids when we’re feeling some child-like fear and frustration ourselves? How do we make kids feel safe and secure, while giving them space to share their feelings? How do you speak to a child in their language? And, perhaps more important, how do you understand them when they speak back?

Mister Rogers knew how to talk to kids, in part because the brilliant child psychologist Dr. Margaret McFarland was his mentor. Operating in the shadow of Benjamin Spock during his Pittsburgh tenure and afterwards (and whose work would not age nearly as well), McFarland focused on meaning. She understood that, to a child, a bee is not just a bee. It’s an existential threat. She offered Fred Rogers these insights and a view into the complex interplay of language and feelings, as they’re experienced by children (which she drew partly from her study of mothers’ interactions with their babies). McFarland helped rework most of the scripts for Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood and the results speaks for itself: The show has quietly captivated children for decades.

Naturally, those around Fred Rogers credited him with inventing the language he spoke. He didn’t. Neither did McFarland. They learned it, and Rogers became the most prominent American to speak it both publicly and fluently. This language came to be known among the crew at KQED, where Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood was filmed, as Freddish. It is, in short, the language of children.

Freddish 101

Like any language, Freddish is not simply a collection of words. Grammar comes with it. Manners, too. It’s easy to think that Mister Rogers cast a spell by speaking simply — and that certainly helped — but it was his clarity and inclusiveness that helped him stand apart. The phrasing was always precise, not clouded by inadvertent negativity or stress. The slow pace, defined by all those pauses, allowed room for kids who were watching to think, to look, and to respond.

The Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood staff were so impressed by Rogers’s ability to speak to children that they wrote a translation manual. Written in jest, but extraordinarily accurate, “Let’s Talk About Freddish,” offers nine commandments of communication that collectively serve as a guide to speaking to young children in a way that facilitates understanding and comfort.

The precepts, which appear in Maxwell King’s The Good Neighbor: The Life and Work of Fred Rogers, are as follows…

1. “State the idea you wish to express as clearly as possible, and in terms preschoolers can understand.” Example: It is dangerous to play in the street. ​​​​​​
2. “Rephrase in a positive manner,” as in It is good to play where it is safe.
3. “Rephrase the idea, bearing in mind that preschoolers cannot yet make subtle distinctions and need to be redirected to authorities they trust.” As in, “Ask your parents where it is safe to play.”
4. “Rephrase your idea to eliminate all elements that could be considered prescriptive, directive, or instructive.” In the example, that’d mean getting rid of “ask”: Your parents will tell you where it is safe to play.
5. “Rephrase any element that suggests certainty.” That’d be “will”: Your parents can tell you where it is safe to play.
6. “Rephrase your idea to eliminate any element that may not apply to all children.” Not all children know their parents, so: Your favorite grown-ups can tell you where it is safe to play.
7. “Add a simple motivational idea that gives preschoolers a reason to follow your advice.” Perhaps: Your favorite grown-ups can tell you where it is safe to play. It is good to listen to them.
8. “Rephrase your new statement, repeating the first step.” “Good” represents a value judgment, so: Your favorite grown-ups can tell you where it is safe to play. It is important to try to listen to them.
9. “Rephrase your idea a final time, relating it to some phase of development a preschooler can understand.” Maybe: Your favorite grown-ups can tell you where it is safe to play. It is important to try to listen to them, and listening is an important part of growing.

The manual is an excellent tool to use when interacting with your child. I might not be able to go through the entire nine-step process or have the time — or, let’s face it, the emotional energy — to speak as thoughtfully as Rogers did. But even keeping in mind one guideline, which is what I’m starting with, makes a difference.

Translating Into Freddish

With most languages, translation is a matter of matching similar words with similar functions. Translating to Freddish, however, is about identifying emotions and relationships as well as words. The goal is to communicate a clear sense of purpose and to provide support while also introducing an idea. The evolution of an adult thought into a Freddish expression would look, in our house, something like this….

1. Put on your damn pajamas. I’ve asked you five times.
2. In case you didn’t hear me the last five times, can you please put on your pajamas?
3. Can you please put on your pajamas? Ask me for help if you’re having trouble with something.
4. It’s time to put on pajamas. I’m always here to help you if you’re having trouble with anything.
5. It’s time to put on pajamas. I can help you if you’re having trouble with anything.
6. It’s time to put on pajamas. I can help you if anything is difficult to do.
7. It’s time to put on pajamas. I can help you if anything is difficult to do. It’s good to get cozy and comfy for sleeping.
8. It’s time to put on pajamas. I can help you if anything is difficult to do. It’s important to get cozy and comfy for sleeping.
9. It’s time to put on pajamas. I can help you if anything is difficult to do. It’s important to get cozy and comfy for sleeping, so that you sleep well and grow big and strong.

How to Listen to Kids Like Fred Rogers

I have a lot to learn when it comes to talking to my daughter: I sound nothing like Number 9. But I have even more to learn about listening — something that Mister Rogers also knew how to do. Watch any episode and you’ll see and hear Rogers leaving quiet space around his words so kids could respond or make observations; making the most of simple, open-ended comments like “Oh,” which allows kids to draw their own conclusions; asking lots and lots of questions, which gives kids a chance to participate in the conversation and feel — incredibly, for a TV show — that the attention is on them.

The pacing of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood can make the show difficult to watch. It’s slow. But that slowness is a product of discipline, and that discipline pays dividends. Adopting that slowness and communicating with purpose is incredibly difficult, but when I manage the trick, I can see my daughter respond. She stops using her favorite daycare expression — “You stepped on my words” — and starts communicating more directly as she senses that I’m listening and not jumping in.

I’ve stopped asking my daughter, “What is it?” when she shows me a drawing. I ask her to tell me about it — and she does. I’m starting to explain more clearly what I ask of her and the reason why. I’m learning to wait while she finds the exact words to explain that her play food is “hair ketchup” that she’s pouring on her head. It can be confusing at times, slow at others, but I understand that it’s my job to sort through what comes out, and Freddish helps. Asking questions helps. Being quiet helps.

Smartphones are small miracles. If your kid has a smartphone, they have access to the world’s accumulated knowledge and whatever TikTok is. Unfortunately, owning a smartphone also means access to porn, violent imagery, and other disturbing content that they’re just not mature enough to see. The other big risk: constantly disappearing into the world of the phone, much of which is designed to be addictive, and not participating enough in real life.

Thankfully, with the rise of these smartphones has come a number of parental-control devices and apps that help you do everything from block problematic sites to set weekly screen-time limits. These six apps, in particular, are excellent tools for monitoring your kids’ usage and setting parameters on what they’re able to see. They’re a must for parents worried that a smartphone might screw their kid up.

Best All-in-One Parenting App: OurPact Parental Control and Kid Tracker

A continual parent favorite, the OurPact Parental Control and Kid Tracker is our pick for best-in-show if you want a little bit of everything. Control screen-time limits, block apps, locate, track, and shut down texts: This one does it all, and it does it all well. There’s even another app, OurPact Jr., that gives kids the information they need regarding their screen-time allowance and schedules. (Free, $2, and $7 monthly plans)

Available on: Google Play

Best Parental Control App for the Young Gamer: Azoomee

Question: What to do for the kid who chews through every game put in front of him or her? Answer: Azoomee. This curated app includes over 1,000 games, puzzles, and activities, all of which have some kind of educational component designed for kids 5 and older. Sometimes, the easiest way to keep an eye on the kid is to trust the digital environment you put them into. (Free version includes access to a small selection of content; premium is $6.50 monthly, $33 for six months, or $59 for the year)

Available on: Apple App Store and Google Play

Best Parental Control App for Practicing What You Preach: Covenant Eyes

Covenant Eyes is an effective porn blocker that will make sure your kids don’t stumble across inernet smut. Once installed it bleaches content from search engines (including when said search engines are accessed through other sites) and YouTube. Should an attempt to gain access be made, a report is sent to you. (Free)

Available on: Apple App Store and Google Play

Best Parental Control App for the Android Family: Google Family Link

As fathers, we want to trust our kids with their own devices, and that’s why Google Family Link is so important. For children under 13, the app manages the apps on their devices, controls screen time, and establishes a bedtime, all while still allowing for installed apps to update. Keep in mind that, while you can monitor your kid’s phone if it’s an iOS device, you can only lock it down it if they have an Android phone. (Free)

Available on: Apple App Store and Google Play

Best Parental Control App for Bands of Roving Children: Kaspersky Safe Kids Family GPS

True, Kaspersky Safe Kids Family GPS offers some of the features you’d expect from a parental control app, such as customizable website blocking, safe search, remote permission granting, app and device usage, and more. But it’s the premium service that distinguishes it from its peers. Once they pay, parents can go beyond just checking their kid’s current location. Should your child leave his or her designated “safe space” you’ll receive an alert. You’ll also receive alerts for suspicious activity and social media monitoring of new friends. Android users can also monitor their texts and calls. (Free; Premium for $12/year)

Available on: Apple App Store and Google Play

Best Parental Control App for Multidevice Protection: Mobicip Parental Controls

Mobicip covers computers, and Mobicip Parental Controls covers smartphones. In short, if your child is using anything short of a library book for research, this app is tracking, filtering, and protecting them. Customize by age, establish a time limit, filter YouTube, and, at the end of the day, receive a report on activities. And since it’s based in the cloud, kids can’t simply switch from wifi to 4LTE to escape its safety net. ($40/year to protect up to five devices)

Available on: Apple App Store, Google Play, Google Chrome, Windows, macOS

Fred Rogers was so good at so many things — rocking a cardigan, controlling puppets, speaking very straightforwardly to children— that it often obscures another skill: he was a damn fine musician, writing a performing hundreds of songs during the show’s masterful run. Figuring out the best Mister Rogers’ songs is mostly all about thinking about why the series was so successful to begin with. Part of the reason why a piece of kids’ entertainment stands the test of time is nearly always connected to music. The reason we still love Sleeping Beauty is because of the brilliant way Disney adapted the classic ballet by Tchaikovsky and, essentially, turned that music into a bunch of pop songs. Nobody thinks about it, but the great visuals in kids’ entertainment are almost always not the reason something is amazing.

The same is true for Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, to an extent. Yes, we love Fred Rogers’ style, but arguably, the words he spoke and the songs are the real reason the show is so enduring. Contemporarily, the descendant of Mister Rogers; Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood, also finds its way into the hearts and minds of children through the helpful songs. And though I think some of the Daniel Tiger songs are great, it’s hard to top the originals from Fred himself.

Here are nine songs from Fred Rogers, ranked in order of how memorable and how good they will make you feel.

9. “You’ve Got to Do It”

I call this one the Mister Rogers version of the ’80s anthem “Relax.” Same energy. Same vibe. But, I think Fred Rogers does this concept better than Frankie Goes to Hollywood, don’t you?

8. “What Do You Do With the Mad That You Feel”

Chances are if you’ve heard this song, you remember it from the very famous speech Mister Rogers gave when he addressed the U.S. Senate. Because this is one of his famous songs that deals with complicated feelings, it’s obviously one of his best. It’s a bit of a talking-through-it song, which is like the Rogers version of Bob Dylan impression, except every word is impeccably enunciated.

7. “You Are My Friend. You Are Special”

There’s a Daniel Tiger song called “We Are Friends.” My daughter likes it a lot. But, the thing is, this song is way better.

6. “The Truth Will Make Me Free”

I have a very strong memory of this song, and I imagine kids who grew up in the ’80s are with me. There’s something about the sentiment of it, combined with the sweetness that really, really stick in your mind. The truth will make you free! He’s right, obviously, but there’s something more magical about it than just that. He’s right, and if you sing along, you can be forgiven for whatever stupid little kid stuff you did. Magic.

5. “Everybody’s Fancy”

If Mister Rogers was Taylor Swift this would be his biggest hit single. This song is great for kids who have just learned the word “fancy,” but also for adults who need to think about their inner-fanciness. A song that is equally good for right before bedtime with your kids, or a boozy brunch with your buddies.

4. “Many Ways to Say I Love You”

Once we start getting into the top of this list, the songs are basically great because they are absurdly sweet. Still, the message of this one has some intelligence behind it. And, I suspect Paul McCartney wished he’d written it.

3. “I’m Taking Care of You”

Feeling safe is probably the most important thing for a child. The reason why Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood worked so well is that the idea of security and comfort was built into everything about the series. And this song is the musical version of that philosophy.

2. “It’s Such a Good Feeling”

You know this one by heart. You’re humming it right now. Not just one of the best Mister Rogers songs of all time, but probably one of the best children’s songs, period. Plus, the bass player is taking it for a walk.

1. “Won’t You Be My Neighbor”

The theme song of a TV show is usually memorable in connection with that show and, therefore, hard to really care about in another context. Like, the theme for Knight Rider; you can’t hear it without thinking about David Hasselhoff, several buttons unbuttoned on a shirt, and a talking car. “Won’t You Be My Neighbor” is like that for Fred Rogers. If you hear you, can picture him taking off his shoes, meticulously. And the reverse works, too. If you take your shoes off slowly and calmly, you’ll be humming this tune.

Finding great movies for kids isn’t easy. It’s not that there aren’t plenty of kids films — just the opposite. Right now, parents are swimming in it. In fact, quantity is part of the problem. But finding, or remembering, the true quality is what makes finding great kids movies all the more difficult. The haystack is growing, and the needles are better hidden in it.

So when a parent picks up a remote, what do they do? You can rely on your own memory, but too often so-called masterpieces and “classics” suddenly seem dated and offensive today. This is another way of saying no, Peter Pan and Dumbo are not on this list.

This isn’t to say parents should only chase new kids movies. If you go that route, you’ll end up with things that are both mindless and boring, like Cars 2 or Hoodwinked. And to make matters worse, some of these movies star talented people and purport to be “clever.”

But it’s not just what kids want that matters. Parents wanting to watch these movies with their children matters, too. Coming up with the 100 best kids movies of all time isn’t about picking some movies you can throw on so the kids are distracted. These movies are about things to watch as a family, because, shared screen time, isn’t really a problem.

Fatherly’s goal here is to offer up movies that every kid should — nay, must! — see by the time they’re 10 years old. These are kids movies for kids at a time in their development when the world is full of wonder and magic — real magic — and jaded Hollywood critiques of films haven’t crept in yet. To do this, we got together six dads plus one film expert — all of whom are film critics — and compiled a list. There were rules: Each film had to be well-received enough to have mostly favorable reviews on respected publications like Common Sense Media or Rotten Tomatoes. These had to be films that families could find — and stream — easily. And finally, the movies had to exhibit a timeless quality, whether they were made in 1955 or 2022. In some instances, we expanded our scope beyond movies that are strictly for kids — like Star Wars — but no matter what, we strived to make sure that the films made sense for families. These are movies that families do watch and should watch together. This list isn’t about making your kids happy. It’s about watching movies together that inspire something bigger.

In order to rank the films, editors, and writers at Fatherly voted on a long list of films to determine the top slots. We didn’t always agree, and so, this entire ranking represents a composite of our views on the best kids movies of all time. Every movie on this list is a must-see. Even if a movie ranks low on this list, we still think this is a great movie because we put it on this list. This is a ranking of great kids movies, not a ranking of bad kids movies at the bottom and good ones at the top.

If you see it on the list, it’s a great movie. So, bust out the microwave popcorn, and dim the lights, here are Fatherly’s best 100 kids movies of all time.

100. FernGully (1992)

Hey, kids, want to learn about protecting the environment and conservation? That’s probably not the most effective way to convince kids to care about the Earth’s ecosystem, but if you tell it to them in the form of fairies, a miniaturized construction worker, a bat voiced by Robin Williams, and a demonic chemical spill voiced by Tim Curry, well, then you’ve got something. The young fairy Crysta (Samantha Mathis) lives in a world where humans are believed to be extinct, destroyed by a dark spirit of pollution known as Hexxus. But when Crysta learns that humans are still out there, she falls in love with a young lumberjack named Zak (Jonathan Ward) and faces off against a reborn Hexxus, whose scenes gave many of us our first experience with kindertrauma. There’s a vast amount of imagination on display in FernGully: The Last Rainforest, and the film remains memorable, which speaks volumes considering it came out in the age of Disney dominance. — RN

Stream FernGully on Pluto TV, Tubi, The Roku Channel, PLEX, and Starz

99. Toy Story 4 (2019)

Toy Story 4 arrived in theaters in 2019, nearly a decade after Toy Story 3. Did the world need another Toy Story adventure? The answer was a resounding... yes, for kids, parents, and parents who were kids when the original Toy Story opened in 1995. Pixar delivered yet again, reuniting old pals Woody and Buzz Lightyear, as well as many of their familiar fellow toys, and spinning a story about friendship, letting go, growing up, freedom, and love. The animation is pristine, the music hits all the right notes, and the story makes time for two wonderful new characters. There's Forky (Tony Hale), a pseudo-toy made of out a plastic spork, some wax and clay, pipe cleaners, and mismatched googly eyes, and Duke Caboom (Keanu Reeves), a Canadian motorcycle-riding daredevil in the Evel Knievel mode. The movie is better and more touching than it has any right to be. — IS

Stream Toy Story 4 on Disney+

98. Yellow Submarine (1968)

The Beatles made their mark in so many ways, even in animation. Yellow Submarine is a surreal, madcap, and strange masterpiece, filled with inside jokes and puns and, of course, some great songs (including the title track, “All Together Now,” “All You Need Is Love,” and “Hey Bulldog”). The story follows the Fab Four — John, Paul, George, and Ringo — as they ride a yellow submarine to help save the good folk of Pepperland from the clutches of the Blue Meanies. The Blue Meanies despise music of any kind, while the Pepperlandians appreciate the music of all stripes. Oddly, the Beatles lent their music and likenesses to Yellow Submarine, but actors provided the voices of the characters. Young children likely won't notice or care. — IS

Stream Yellow Submarine on Apple TV

97. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (2001)

The very first entry in the Harry Potter franchise often gets a bum rap, and it’s a bit undeserved. Director and co-producer Chris Columbus launched the franchise, playing a major role in casting all the key players, including Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, and Rupert Grint, plus the late, great Richard Harris and Alan Rickman. He also established the magical world of Hogwarts and many of its visual cues and captured the elements of inclusiveness and chosen family inherent in J.K. Rowling’s novel. The film as a whole may be workman-like, but there’s an overall warmth to it, and Columbus elicited wonderful performances from his young cast, especially Radcliffe, and he’s owed an enormous debt of gratitude. — IS

Stream Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone on Peacock, Max, or fuboTV.

96. The Absent-Minded Professor (1961)

When it came to manic comic genius, Fred MacMurray had nothing on Robin Williams, who took on the actor’s The Absent-Minded Professor iconic role as an insufficiently practical professor in the hit remake Flubber. But when it came to all-American affability, no one could top the star of Double Indemnity and My Three Sons. 1961’s The Absent-Minded Professor gave MacMurray one of his signature roles as a daffy professor who invents a flying substance called Flubber and then must deal with the unexpected consequences. Along with Mary Poppins (which, to be fair, features animation), The Absent-Minded Professor is about as good as live-action 1960s Disney got, which is very good indeed. — NR

Stream The Absent-Minded Professor on Disney+

95. The Fox and the Hound (1981)

People like to think that Pixar invented the tear-jerker kids movie (see: Up, Inside Out, Toy Story 3, etc.), but the OG House of Mouse knew how to cue the waterworks. The Fox and the Hound is a quiet, understated story of an adorable fox kit and a puppy who become fast friends only to grow up and be told, by those around them and even their very natures, that they’re meant to be enemies. With adorable animal antics, a remarkably mature and bittersweet ending, and a terrifying bear who is low-key one of the best Disney villains, The Fox and the Hound is a special, special movie with an important, melancholy, and beautiful message about friendship. - IS

Stream The Fox and the Hound on Disney+

94. Bedknobs and Broomsticks (1971)

The live-action/animation hybrid Bedknobs and Broomsticks offers an irresistible central conflict: witches versus Nazis, Wiccans versus the SS. A perfectly cast Angela Lansbury is a force of nature as newbie witch Miss Price. The spell-caster enters the lives of three children traumatized by World War II with an eye toward using her ever-increasing knowledge of the dark arts to help defeat the Axis powers. It’s a nifty premise begging for a contemporary update, particularly since we are, if anything, even more, obsessed with fascists and practitioners of the occult, a group that overlaps a fair amount. — NR

Stream Bedknobs and Broomsticks on Disney+

93. The Parent Trap (1961)

Hayley Mills solidified her standing as the Queen of Disney live action with a masterful dual turn in 1961’s The Parent Trap as identical twin sisters who are separated at birth and grow up without knowledge of the other’s existence. The very different siblings meet at summer camp and scheme to reunite parents Brian Keith and Maureen O’Hara as they go from strangers to siblings to dear friends. Disney used old-school movie magic, extensive split screens, and some damn fine acting to create the illusion that one gifted child actor was two distinct human beings. It’s an ingenious premise borrowed from the 1949 novel by Erich Kästner that led to a number of TV sequels and a swell 1998 remake starring a terrific Lindsay Lohan in a star-making performance that promised more than her career ultimately delivered. — NR

Stream The Parent Trap on Disney+

92. The Rescuers Down Under (1990)

Crikey! The Rescuers Down Under could have gone under so easily. It was a sequel to the beloved (but problematic) 1977 movie, The Rescuers. And it seemed to want to be set in Australia only to cash in on the popularity of Crocodile Dundee. It could’ve been a disaster, but instead, it’s an unexpected delight, a quirky action romp with a memorable setting, exciting stakes, and a pretty good environmental message. — JG

Stream The Rescuers Down Under on Disney+

91. Muppets Christmas Carol (1992)

This may shock you, but Charles Dickens? Pretty good writer! The Muppet Christmas Carol, for all of its wonderful puppetry and humor, is remarkably faithful to Dickens’ original story, which makes the inclusion of familiar, outsize characters like Kermit and Miss Piggy all the more delightful in their contrast. At several points, Gonzo (playing the role of Dickens), straight-up recites the author’s original text verbatim. Michael Caine’s legendary and completely earnest performance brings it all together, as at no point does his Scrooge treat his felt co-stars as a joke. The Muppet Christmas Carol is such a gift because it doesn’t just rely on the Muppets many strengths, but uses them to bring out the best of a 19th century classic. — JG

Stream Muppets Christmas Carol on Disney+

90. The Black Cauldron (1985)

Based on the first two books in Lloyd Alexander’s Chronicles of Prydain series, The Black Cauldron was a rare box office bomb for Disney, though has since become a cult classic among fantasy fans. There is a surprising level of darkness to this tale of an assistant pig farmer, Taran, and his companions who seek out a mystical Black Cauldron that the Horned King plans to use to create an army of the undead. One of Disney’s few PG-rated animated movies, The Black Cauldron doesn’t steer away from some horrific images or even death, but it does so with such an atmosphere that the film feels like an artistic wonder, even if it’s too scary for most kids and too narratively simplistic for most adults. — RN

Stream The Black Cauldron on Disney+

89. Stuart Little (1999)

Family films don’t come much better than Stuart Little. Rob Minkoff, who directed the animated classic The Lion King, tried his hand at this live-action/animated hybrid, which brings to life E.B. White’s beloved book of the same name. Essentially, the Little family (Hugh Laurie, Geena Davis, Jonathan Lipnicki) of New York City adopts a talking mouse, Stuart (voiced by Michael J. Fox), not as a pet, but as a son/brother. Gently, playfully, and with heart and state-of-the-art visual effects/animation, Minkoff explores friendship, family, jealousy (Nathan Lane is a hoot as the Littles’ covetous cat, Snowbell), fear, bullying, sibling rivalry, and more. — IS

Stream Stuart Little on MGM+

88. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005)

While Prisoner of Azkaban took the Harry Potter franchise into the dark, The Goblet of Fire truly upped the ante with the first PG-13 entry, pushing Harry, Ron, and Hermione closer to adulthood as the threat of Voldemort loomed ever closer. Featuring the World Quidditch Cup, a wide variety of magical creatures, and an expansion of the Wizarding World. The Goblet of Fire is a testament to all of the fun the franchise can offer, but also the darker designs waiting at the end of the fun and games. Voldemort’s return provides a frightening yet enthralling lesson about growing up. — RN

Stream Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire on Peacock, Max, or fuboTV

87. Shrek (2001)

At this point, Shrek is more meme than movie, more glib punchline than a cinematic experience. The film’s once revered reputation has taken a hit over time thanks to unnecessary sequels, spin-offs, sequels to spin-offs, TV shows, parody, and imitation. So it’s easy to forget what a pop culture phenomenon Shrek was at the time of its release or how rapturously it was received. The film’s smart-ass take on fairy tale mythology was a very direct rebuke to the saccharine niceness of Dreamworks honcho Jeffrey Katzenberg’s old employer, Disney. Shrek was a massive hit that made Dreamworks as a force in animation and helped establish the studio’s aesthetic. Shrek proved massively influential, for better or worse, and won the first Academy Award for Best Animated Feature. — NR

Stream Shrek on Netflix

86. Tarzan (1999)

The last film of Disney’s renaissance era, Tarzan gives new life to Edgar Rice Burroughs’ iconic tale of a man raised by apes. Tarzan explores what it means to be human, pitting Tarzan (Tony Goldwyn) against the savage William Cecil Clayton (Brian Blessed) for the love of Jane Porter (Minnie Driver). There’s just something so inherently cool about Tarzan in this movie, dreadlocked, and surfing on trees like a bohemian extreme sports athlete. But beyond the cool, there’s a lot of heart in Tarzan’s search for belonging. With its big emotions, and backed by an original soundtrack by Phil Collins, Tarzan feels like an epic rock opera. — RN

Stream Tarzan on Disney+

85. Moana (2016)

Whenever Disney strays from adapting the traditional European fairy tales we all know and love, it’s a pretty safe bet that they’ll deliver something special. While it’s not a direct adaptation of any particular story, Moana draws from Polynesian myths to tell a beautiful tale about a young woman who discovers herself through her ancestors and saves her culture with the help of a demigod. With fantastic vocal performances from Auliʻi Cravalho, Dwayne Johnson, and Jemaine Clement; brilliant songwriting by Lin-Manuel Miranda, Mark Mancina, and Opetaia Foa’i; stunning environmental effects; and a chase sequence inspired by Mad Max: Fury Road; Moana is a high point in Disney’s modern animated canon. — RN

Stream Moana on Disney+

84. Anastasia (1997)

Don Bluth and Gary Goldman were at the top of their games when they directed this lush retelling of the legend of Grand Duchess Anastasia. Here, the character is 18-year-old amnesiac Anya, voiced primarily by Meg Ryan (with assists from Kirsten Dunst, Lacey Chabert, and Liz Callaway), who yearns to locate her family. The animation is gorgeous and the songs range from OK to really good, but the voice cast truly sets Anastasia apart. Just listing the names will eat up the rest of the allowed word count — John Cusack, Angela Lansbury, Kelsey Grammer, Bernadette Peters, Christopher Lloyd, Andrea Martin, Hank Azaria, and then-relative newcomers Billy Porter and J.K. Simmons. — IS

Stream Anastasia on Disney+

83. Encanto (2021)

Perhaps the best thing about Encanto — well, the second-best thing after “We Don’t Talk About Bruno,” an instant addition to Disney’s top-tier songs — is that it doesn’t end the way you expect it to. Our plucky heroine, the only member of a superpowered family without an ability of her own, doesn’t end the movie with a special power. Encanto is about acceptance, both of yourself and the people you love. — JG

Stream Encanto on Disney+

82. Incredibles 2 (2018)

Although the long-awaited sequel to the first Incredibles doesn’t have the same novelty as the original, it does do one thing the first movie failed to do: Show what a stay-at-home dad's life is like. The way that Incredibles 2 flips the script on the very old-timey parental gender roles is essential.

A bit scarier than the original, Incredibles 2 is still one of the best Pixar movies of all time and presents family life not as you wish it was, but mostly, as it actually is.

Stream Incredibles 2 on Disney+

81. Explorers (1985)

Explorers is an imperfect gem of a movie. Three teen boys — Ben (Ethan Hawke), Wolfgang (River Phoenix), and Darren (Jason Presson) — build a spacecraft and venture into space, all based on Ben’s dreams. Soon, they meet actual aliens, who are as fascinated by the boys as the boys are by them. There are magical moments, strong performances (especially Hawke and Phoenix, who made their film debuts here and soon would be major stars), and some very cool creatures. Fans of director Joe Dante will get a kick out of seeing his go-to ensemble, including Robert Picardo and Dick Miller. — IS

Stream Explorers on Pluto TV

80. The Princess and the Frog (2009)

The Princess and the Frog rarely feels like it gets the attention it deserves. Maybe it’s because it’s a hand-drawn feature released in the age of computer animation or because the film is entrenched in African American culture in 1920s New Orleans. Either way, the film takes the classic fairy tale and transforms it into a story of chasing one’s dreams but also not forgetting to enjoy life in the process. Tiana (Anika Noni Rose) is practical and driven, while Prince Naveen (Bruno Campos) is irresponsible, yet when a botched voodoo spell turns them both into frogs, they’re forced to re-examine their lives, not by sacrificing who they are but by being additive and open. The opening musical number is a showstopper and the film features one of Disney’s most terrifying animated villains in the voodoo bokor Dr. Facilier (Keith David). — RN

Stream The Princess and the Frog on Disney+

79. The Sword in the Stone (1963)

There will always be something appealing to young minds about the story of King Arthur and the sword in the stone, the idea that you might have a secret destiny that doesn’t rely on strength or power but being chosen. As far as chosen one stories go, The Sword in the Stone is just a good time and solely focuses on young Arthur, without getting into the Knights of the Round Table, Mordred, and the King’s darker future. The story may be slight, largely focused on Merlin teaching Arthur important life lessons by turning him into a variety of animals, but it’s never short on entertainment. While it’s a far cry from the epic scope of T.H. White’s The Once and Future King, the whimsy through which fantasy is approached feels like a good entry point for kids before introducing them to The Black Cauldron, The Hobbit, and Harry Potter. — RN

Stream The Sword in the Stone on Disney+

78. The Muppets (2011)

After years of increasing irrelevance among modern audiences and direct-to-video films that did little to increase their stature, the Muppets made their big comeback in 2011. Co-written by and starring Jason Segel and featuring the talents of Amy Adams and Chris Cooper, alongside a who’s who of celebrity cameos, The Muppets recaptured the heart, humor, and iconic music of Jim Henson’s beloved creations.

It’s a “get the band back together” movie that not only relies on audiences’ nostalgia but also provides a great entry point for new viewers to fall in love with these characters. — RN

Stream The Muppets on Disney+

77. One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961)

When people contemplate the wide world of Walt Disney animated movies, many immediately think of their heroine or hero, while other folks instantly recall the villain. Be honest... Can you even remember who the hero of One Hundred and One Dalmatians is? Our point exactly. Sure, you recall the adorable spotted dogs, all 101 of them. But it's Cruella de Vil — voiced by the late, great Betty Lou Gerson — who stole the show. Haughty and terrifying and dangerous and greedy, and driving around in the coolest of cars, she's a character for the ages — and still deliriously fun to watch. — IS

Stream One Hundred and One Dalmatians on Disney+

76. Treasure Planet (2002)

Treasure Planet was an enormous flop when it came out, bombing at the box office despite being the most expensive traditionally animated film ever made. That’s a shame because this swashbuckling space adventure shines brighter than a chest full of doubloons. Robert Louis Stevenson’s Treasure Island is a classic for a reason (this is not the only adaption of the book you’ll find on this list, though this one is Muppet-free), and by updating the setting to make it a sci-fi space opera, Treasure Planet brings a whole new life to a timeless tale. — JG

Stream Treasure Planet on Disney+

75. Matilda (1996)

Danny DeVito directed and co-starred in this faithful adaptation of the beloved Roald Dahl novel of the same name. Mara Wilson — who is 35 now!!!! — stars as Matilda, a 6-year-old girl with magical powers and a terrible, hateful family (including DeVito as Matilda’s father). Supported by a loving teacher, Miss Honey (the wonderful Embeth Davidtz, who should have been a major star), Matilda comes to harness her powers, namely her humanity and her telekinetic abilities. DeVito captures the dark, seedy, mean-spiritedness of the world around Matilda.

Stream Matilda on Netflix.

74. Ponyo (2008)

Ponyo tells a very simple (if somewhat strange) story: A little goldfish falls in love with a boy and wants to become a human little girl. It’s the stuff fairy tales are made of. What the Brothers Grimm didn’t have, though, was Hayao Miyazaki. The life and colors and movement in Studio Ghibli’s ocean are a wonder to behold, a spellbinding display of beautiful complexity that elevates the wonderfully childlike story. (Or should we say, submerges it?) — JG

Stream Ponyo on Max

73. Coraline (2009)

Based on Neil Gaiman’s novella, Henry Selick’s Coraline is kindertrauma at its finest. It’s boundary-pushing, nightmare-inducing, and a powerful story about the importance of family. When Coraline stumbles into a parallel universe with parents more attentive than her own, she believes she’s found a sanctuary. But there’s a much darker truth to this alternate world, and the horror that lurks there is enough to even give some adults a pause. Coraline is a welcome challenge for younger viewers interested in horror and dark fantasy. And in an age of computer animation, its stop-motion animation is a rare sight to behold. — RN

Rent Coraline on Amazon Prime Video.

72. Spy Kids (2001)

Robert Rodriguez is a signature voice, one that even in the space of kids movies is still instantly recognizable. When Carmen and Juni’s superspy parents are captured, the siblings use their parents’ resources to save them from crazed children’s television host, Fegan Floop. Spy Kids revels in absurdity while also offering a loving entry point to the espionage genre. Action, mystery, and cool gadgets are plenty to hold a kid’s interest. Oh, and then there’s the Thumb-Thumbs, truly the stuff of nightmares, yet made entirely plausible in Rodriguez’s gonzo fantasy world. — RN

Stream Spy Kids on Max

71. Time Bandits (1981)

Terry Gilliam, Monty Python’s resident animator turned twisted auteur, turned his attention to the world of children’s entertainment with the surprise 1981 hit Time Bandits. It’s a rollicking dark comedy about a contemporary child who ends up falling in with a group of time-traveling little people who journey through the ages with larceny in their souls. Even at his most PG and wholesome, Gilliam still managed to invest an awful lot of humor, darkness, personality, and imagination into the proceedings. Time Bandits is the kind of movie that makes kids fall in love with film as a medium and its infinite possibilities. Did we mention George Harrison did the songs? — RN

Stream Time Bandits on Max

70. Hercules (1997)

Greek gods get the Disney treatment with this entertaining romp of a movie that, for the sake of the kids in the audience, tones down the darker side of typical mythology tales. So, for example, Hera is good versus evil. Fast-paced and entertaining, with yet another all-star cast and some offbeat wildcards (Tate Donovan, Susan Egan, Danny DeVito, Rip Torn, Samantha Eggar, Hal Holbrook, Wayne Knight, Paul Shaffer, Charlton Heston, Bobcat Goldthwait, Matt Frewer, and, best of all, James Woods as fast-talking villain Hades). Interestingly, Hercules is considered a box office disappointment, as it only grossed $99 million at the U.S. box office. — IS

Stream Hercules on Disney+

69. Space Jam (1996)

The premise of Space Jam only barely made sense in the ’90s. Michael Jordan, just off the peak of his powers and finishing an odd stint as a minor-league baseball player, combined with the Looney Tunes, who were in vogue again for reasons that may or may not have had to do with the popularity of bootleg “gangster” Looney Tunes shirts. Space Jam shouldn’t work — and in many ways, it doesn’t, actually — but there’s something so bewildering about how inexplicable it all is that you can’t help but have a good time. — JG

Rent Space Jam on Amazon Prime Video

68. Mulan (1998)

There’s an impressive level of maturity to Mulan, given the subject of a young woman who joins the Imperial Chinese Army, disguised as a man, in order to save her ailing father from certain death. The stakes, both in terms of the film’s depiction of China and those for Mulan herself, couldn’t be higher, and yet the risks are in service of something greater: honor. Mulan is one of Disney’s most well-rounded animated characters, and Ming-Na Wen lends the character an endearing spark of resilience and humor that allows Mulan to be equally convincing as an underdog and a warrior. And Eddie Murphy keeps the film’s energy up as Mushu. Songwriters Matthew Wilder and David Zippel, who came aboard as last-minute replacements to the film if you can believe it, deliver an iconic soundtrack that’s impossible to forget. — RN

Stream Mulan on Disney+

67. Alice in Wonderland (1951)

Alice in Wonderland is considered a classic today, often mentioned in the same breath as such early Walt Disney animated fare as Snow White, Cinderella, Bambi, and Dumbo. Visually, it’s gorgeous and inventive, as well as far trippier and less linear than anything that preceded it and most of what followed it, which makes sense since it’s an adaptation of Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Any child who has read the book and liked it can surely handle the film. If it’s a young child’s first introduction to Carroll’s world, be prepared to answer questions and possibly quell concerns. — IS

Stream Alice in Wonderland on Disney+

66. Raya and the Last Dragon (2021)

Raya and the Last Dragon is a spectacle to behold, a film that not only emphasizes the importance of unity but stands as a fantastic action film as well. The warrior princess Raya (Kelly Marie Tran), who witnessed a tragedy that turned her father into stone and divided her people, seeks out a dragon, Sisu (Awkwafina) in order to restore a mystic gem and drive the evil spirits from her land. Co-directed by Moana’s Don Hall and Carlos Lopez Estrada, Raya and the Last Dragon boldly subverts the expectations of fantasy and the traditional notions of good and evil by highlighting the complexities and beauty of different cultures. It’s the Disney animated film for this current age. — RN

Stream Raya and the Last Dragon on Disney+

65. Pinocchio (1940)

The cautionary tale that is Pinocchio has been told countless times on the big screen, in versions animated and live-action. Oscar winner Guillermo del Toro has a new one on the way, and we’re excited to see it. Nothing, however, beats Walt Disney’s 1940 animated musical. The story still touches the heart, with its relatable I-want-to-be-a-real-boy scenario and Geppetto’s boundless love for his puppet creation. And the songs, especially “When You Wish Upon a Star” and “I’ve Got No Strings,” are as timeless as ever. “When You Wish Upon a Star” and the film's score both won Academy Awards. — IS

Stream Pinocchio on Disney+

64. Lady and the Tramp (1955)

Lady and the Tramp is a sentimental favorite for many Disney fans. And that’s because love is in the air for Lady, a sweet-but-spoiled cocker spaniel, and Tramp, an easygoing, self-sufficient mutt. The story is adorable, the animation is charming, and the romance is swoon-worthy. The spaghetti-and-meatball scene, which ends in an accidental — and iconic — kiss continues to raise a smile nearly 70 years later. Peggy Lee voices several of the film’s characters and sings a trio of songs, and her contributions are priceless, especially the Brooklyn accent she brings to the character Peg. — IS

Stream Lady and the Tramp on Disney+

63. Batman (1966)

Sure, Batman’s known as the Dark Knight, but with all due respect to Christian Bale and Robert Pattinson, the Caped Crusader doesn’t always need to be dark and edgy. Batman ’66 takes Adam West’s charming, corny, and comical take on Batman from the old TV show and blows it up to feature length. There’s room in the world for a Batman who tracks down a serial killer and a Batman who fends off a shark with his handy dandy Shark Repellent Bat-Spray… and one of those two Batmen is much more kid-friendly. Biff! Pow! Comics aren’t just for kids anymore (but sometimes they are, and it’s wonderful). — JG

Stream Batman on YouTube TV

62. A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965)

In a lot of ways, A Charlie Brown Christmas is kind of like Charlie Brown’s wimpy little Christmas tree. The animation is somewhat janky, the plot a little scattershot, and it’s pretty short. Those qualities, though, are part of what makes it such a wonderful and enduring classic. Those quirks are what makes A Charlie Brown Christmas feel distinct and special rather than generic, and like Charlie Brown’s tree, it has a lot of heart if you’ll just show it a little love. — JG

Stream A Charlie Brown Christmas on Apple TV+

61. James and the Giant Peach (1996)

Roald Dahl’s stories are unique among all children’s literature. There’s nobody else who could blend such imaginative, loving whimsy with a twisted, dark, and scary streak. Fitting, then, that James and the Giant Peach doesn’t really look like any other children’s movie, sporting a distinct stop-motion style that’s both lush and ever-so-slightly off-putting. It’s a weird movie with a bit of an edge, and that makes it extra-ripe for enjoyment. — JG

Stream James and the Giant Peach on Disney+

60. Beauty and the Beast (1991)

This “tale as old as time,” as Mrs. Potts calls it, was the first (and for many years, only) animated movie to have ever been nominated for Best Picture at the Oscars. It’s more than deserving of the accolade. Few movies before or since, in any medium, have pulled off what Beauty and the Beast pulls off, making a very furry sort of romance feel effortlessly timeless. The fact that every song in the movie is an all-time classic certainly helps. — JB

Stream Beauty and the Beast on Disney+ and Sling TV

59. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (2005)

The magical world of C.S. Lewis comes to life in a fantastical adaptation directed by Andrew Adamson, making his live-action debut after Shrek and Shrek 2. Four children step through a wardrobe into a world of wonder and dangers and learn that the fate of Narnia is in their hands. The kids — Anna Popplewell, William Moseley, Skandar Keynes, and especially young Georgie Henley (who is now 27!!) — are wonderful and share genuine sibling-esque chemistry, while James McAvoy (as the faun, Mr. Tumnus), Tilda Swinton (as the cold, imperious White Witch), and Liam Neeson (as the voice of the regal lion, Aslan) elevate every scene they’re in. The Narnia series spanned three films, and it’s a treat to watch the core quartet of actors mature physically and as performers.

Stream The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe on Disney+

58. How the Grinch Stole Christmas (1966)

There are three factors that make How the Grinch Stole Christmas such a holiday classic. The first is Dr. Seuss, who penned and illustrated the book that inspired the animated adaptation. The second is legendary Looney Tunes animator Chuck Jones, who put such life and whimsy into every frame. The final thing that makes Grinch such a Christmas staple is a man who’s more typically associated with Halloween. Boris Karloff, Frankenstein’s Monster himself, provides narration that gives the colorful and festive proceedings just the right amount of gravitas.

Stream How the Grinch Stole Christmas on Peacock

57. The Land Before Time (1988)

Disney veteran turned studio head Don Bluth reportedly had to cut an awful lot of potentially nightmare-inducing and child-traumatizing scenes to secure a G rather than PG rating for 1988’s The Land Before Time. That helps explain the film’s brisk 69-minute runtime. But an awful lot of darkness slipped into the film all the same. Bluth’s crowd-pleaser occupies an ancient, lost world both beautiful and unmistakably grim, marked with death, abandonment, and fear. Computers would soon take over animation, but The Land Before Time illustrates the incredible artistry of hand-drawn animation at its most time- and labor-intensive. The Land Before Time wasn’t just followed by a direct-to-video sequel but rather 13 follow-ups that, needless to say, aren’t anywhere near as essential or revered as the original. — NR

Stream The Land Before Time on Netflix.

56. Aladdin (1992)

Aladdin is maybe the most important animated film since Steamboat Willie. There were cartoons before Robin Williams — a bona fide celebrity! — voiced the Genie, and then there was everything that came after. From then on, it would be the norm for animated movies to feature big-name live-action voice actors. With Aladdin, though, such casting was still exciting and new, and although the rest of the movie boasts gorgeous visuals and a swashbuckling story, Aladdin is Williams’ movie. He’s perfectly cast as the Genie, because he, like his all-powerful blue counterpart, is a magical force that just needed to be unleashed. Aladdin ain’t never had a friend like him, and audiences ain’t never seen anything like him, either. — JG

Stream Aladdin on Disney+

55. Lilo & Stitch (2002)

Lilo & Stitch expands the Disney formula considerably. Here, we get Stitch (aka Experiment 626), a blue alien creature who resembles a cross between a dog and a koala bear, arriving on Earth — specifically Hawaii — where he befriends Lilo, a quirky, feisty, and independent young girl. Lilo and Stitch cause chaos wherever they go, and the powers-that-be on Stitch’s planet want him brought back home. The story spotlights friendship and love and family, especially chosen family, and it’s complemented by colorful animation that ventures from outer space to the beaches of Hawaii, as well as a half-dozen smartly utilized Elvis Presley songs. — IS

Stream Lilo & Stitch on Disney+

54. Coco (2017)

So many “kids” movies are about death — or at the very least, prominently feature death in the opening moments. (See: every Disney movie with a dead mom.) Coco goes beyond that in a beautiful, touching, and technicolor way. Miguel’s journey to the Dia de los Muertos-inspired Land of the Dead is a fun adventure, but it’s also a warm and earnest reflection on family and how those we’ve loved and lost are never really gone if you remember them. — JG

Stream Coco on Disney+

53. The Great Muppet Caper (1981)

Perhaps it’s appropriate, given that the film is a madcap heist, but Jim Henson’s directorial debut is a criminally underrated gem. Sandwiched between 1979’s The Muppet Movie and 1984’s The Muppets Take Manhattan, the Muppets’ second feature film, set in London, is actually second-to-none. Its soundtrack is filled with singable tunes, including the touching “The First Time It Happens,” the hilariously bombastic “Piggy’s Fantasy,” and the freewheeling Electric Mayhem-led rock-disco groove “Night Life.” There are a number of truly laugh-out-loud moments (including a great sight-gag that punctuates a running joke about an unexpected familial connection between Kermit and Fozzie), but the film’s true accomplishment is the way it pushes the bounds of puppetry to tell a story full of humor and heart. When Kermit, Piggy, and the rest of the gang sing and ride bicycles through Battersea Park, you’ll temporarily forget that you’re watching creatures made of foam and felt. — CG

Stream The Great Muppet Caper on Disney+

52. Up (2009)

Up is arguably the zenith of Pixar animation. It’s beautiful to look at, funny as can be, and touching beyond words. Ed Asner provides the voice of Carl, a cranky old widower who winds up on the adventure of a lifetime in South America, not with his late, beloved wife, Ellie, but rather with an excitable young Wilderness Explorer named Russell (Jordan Nagai) who somehow becomes chosen family. Asner deserved an Oscar, and Christopher Plummer (as an explorer chasing an elusive bird named Kevin) is equally good. The opening sequence, a remarkable four minutes and 22 seconds that reveal Carl and Ellie’s love story, never fails to reduce grown adults to puddles of tears. — IS

Stream Up on Disney+

51. Pete’s Dragon (1977)

Even as an adult, it’s still a delight to see cartoons interacting with live-action people or environments. They’re two different mediums! They don’t belong together! Pete’s Dragon capitalizes on this inherent excitement by making Elliot (Pete’s titular dragon) the only animated part of the movie, instantly signaling that he’s 1) not part of the mundane flesh-and-blood world and 2) he’s a kinder, more cartoony sort of figure. Pete’s Dragon is uneven in a way a lot of Disney films of the era are, but you just can’t beat a big green cartoon dragon being best friends with a little boy. — JG

Stream Pete’s Dragon on Disney+

50. The Lion King (1994)

The 1980s-1990s Disney animation renaissance found inspiration from the highest of highbrow sources when 1994’s The Lion King gave Hamlet an animated, anthropomorphic spin. (Wait is it Hamlet?) The heavy, dramatic story of a young prince who must deal with duplicity and betrayal in his own family in the form of his nefarious uncle Scar (Jeremy Irons, oozing effete villainy) is lightened by the comic relief antics of Timon and Pumba and infectious ditties like “Hakuna Matata” from the songwriting team of Elton John and Tim Rice, who picked up a staggering three Oscar nominations for best song from this film alone. With The Lion King Disney aspired nakedly to greatness and achieved it. — NR

Stream The Lion King on Disney+

49. Flight of the Navigator (1986)

The 1980s were full of kids movies that owed their existence to the zeitgeist-capturing success of E.T. Steven Spielberg himself produced many of these, most notably Gremlins and its sequel. Spielberg was not involved with Disney’s 1986 cult classic The Flight of the Navigator, but it’s hard to overstate his influence on the film. The Flight of the Navigator reproduces the central dynamic of E.T. by having a child befriend a space alien with an adorably childlike spirit and sensibility. Only in this case, the playful E.T. in question is Max, the robotic controller of a spaceship that ferries a lonely boy throughout space. Only a year after the breakout success of Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure, Paul Reubens provides the voice as well as the impish, lovable spirit of Max in a motormouthed, virtuoso turn. — NR

Stream Flight of the Navigator on Disney+

48. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)

Roald Dahl was as notorious for anti-Semitism as he was revered for his enduring genius, yet Willie Wonka, his most famous creation, will forever be associated with Jewish actor Gene Wilder. Wilder found the perfect tone for the legendary gimmick-happy confectioner, at once vaguely sociopathic, dryly sarcastic, wildly condescending, secretly humane, and ultimately very sad, even tragic. Wilder’s Wonka looks down on humanity, but particularly children, as if they are a lesser species he will never understand because they fundamentally defy comprehension. The nightmare-inducing production numbers, sadistically catchy songs, and free-floating darkness certainly help but the key to the film’s enduring cult lies in the tricky genius of Wilder’s uncompromising and utterly fearless performance.

Rent Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory on Amazon Prime Video

47. The Aristocats (1970)

Disney got jazzy with The Aristocats, and that fact is reflected in the whirlwind animated imagery that accompanies the jaunty musical numbers. The story unfolds in Paris in 1910 and centers on Duchess (Eva Gabor) and her three kittens, who are dumped in the countryside by Edgar (Roddy Maude-Roxby), a butler displeased that the cats, and not him, will inherit his employer's fortune. Heading back to Paris, they encounter O’Malley (Phil Harris), who becomes a love interest for Duchess and a father figure to the kittens, and O’Malley’s musically inclined alley cat pal, Scat Cat (Scatman Crothers) and his singing, dancing, and instrument-playing buddies. The Aristocats is particularly fun for kids, with lots of silly gags and chases. The music and voices are aces.

The only thing parents should be aware of is that a few of the background jazz cats flirt with racial stereotypes. It’s nothing approaching how offensive Dumbo or Peter Pan gets (neither of which made our list for that exact reason), but just be aware. The upside here is that this is one of the least scary classic Disney movies of all time. — IS

Stream The Aristocats on Disney+

46. Wall-E (2008)

There are tons of kids movies with environmental messages, which is great, but so many of them are not exactly subtle, and they beat their viewer over the head about saving the Earth to the point where you almost wonder if it’s no longer effective. That’s not the case with Wall-E, which has enough faith in its audience to trust that they’ll get the message through a lengthy first act that almost feels like a silent movie. Things get a little more explicit when Wall-E goes to space and finds what remains of the human race, but even so, the film resists spelling everything out for its viewer. As humanity rediscovers at the end, it’s more rewarding when you put in some of the work yourself. — JG

Stream Wall-E on Disney+

45. A Christmas Story (1983)

Children hear the word “no” an awful lot: Can I stay up late? Can I have ice cream for breakfast? Can I bike ride to Japan to see my favorite band in concert? No, no, no. Director Bob Clark perfectly encapsulates this truism in A Christmas Story, a series of childhood vignettes from writer and raconteur Jean Shepherd (who also narrates the film as adult Ralphie) connected by a common thread: 9-year-old Ralphie Parker’s desire for an Official Red Ryder carbine action 200-shot range model air rifle. It’s a mouthful, and also potentially dangerous, as nearly every adult reminds him throughout the movie’s 94-minute runtime. Even the Big Guy from the North Pole is in on the safety conspiracy: “You’ll shoot your eye out, kid,” a department store Santa Claus says before pushing Ralphie down a giant slide with his big, black boot. “Ho, ho, ho.” Everything works out in the end — for the most part — and by the time the final credits roll, A Christmas Story proves itself to be about more than a young boy’s quest for a toy. It’s about the importance of family, friends, and slowing down to appreciate the simple moments in life before they pass you by. After all, isn’t that what the holidays are all about?

Rent A Christmas Story on Amazon Prime Video

44. Willow (1988)

Adventure and romance are at the heart of Willow, a late 1980s fantasy film from director Ron Howard and producer George Lucas that’s grown in popularity over the years — and remains good family fun. A baby is destined to cause the downfall of an evil sorceress, Queen Bavmorda of Nockmaar (Jean Marsh), and she wants the infant killed. The effort to protect that child leads to an unlikely partnership between Willow (Warwick Davis), a goodhearted Nelwyn little person and aspiring sorcerer, and a braggadocious mercenary, Madmartigan (Val Kilmer), who romances Queen Bavmorda’s free-spirited daughter, Sorsha (Joanne Whalley) — or does she romance him? Kilmer and Whalley ended up getting married in real life, and Davis, who charms from beginning to end, will reprise his role as Willow in an upcoming Disney+ series.

Stream Willow on Disney+

43. The Lego Movie (2014)

Audiences and critics alike did not have high hopes for 2014’s The Lego Movie, a motion picture inspired by a popular line of plastic building toys for children. Post-modern pranksters Phil Lord and Christopher Miller’s blindingly shiny CGI animated comedy about an affable everyman, voiced by Chris Pratt, who discovers that he may possess a heroic destiny soared above the low, low expectations engendered by its inspiration with a wild romp through seemingly the entirety of pop culture, or at least the intellectual property Warner Bros. controls. The Lego Movie isn’t just funny and inventive; it’s also surprisingly satirical and unexpectedly emotional. The Lego Movie isn’t just funny and entertaining; it’s genuinely about something as well. — NR

Stream The Lego Movie Netflix.

42. Robin Hood (1973)

The 1970s are not generally seen as a high point for Disney animation. The period between Walt Disney’s death in 1967 and the Disney renaissance of the late 1980s and 1990s represents a wilderness period for the studio, but the films it made in that ostensibly fallow time nevertheless connected with audiences, particularly children, in a big way. This is particularly true of 1973’s Robin Hood, the House of Mouse’s beloved Nixon-era adaptation of the classic yarn about a heroic soul who steals from the rich and gives to the poor, with songs by country’s oddball genius Roger Miller. Brian Bedford might just have done too good of a job of making the title character foxy in more ways than one, as Robin Hood has created more furries than just about any other film that side of Zootopia, which was very overtly inspired by Robin Hood and its iconic hero. — NR

Stream Robin Hood on Disney+ or Pluto TV

41. Toy Story (1995)

On paper, Toy Story did not look particularly distinguished. It was the first movie from a new studio called Pixar involved in the excitingly, terrifyingly new field of feature-length computer animation. Even less encouragingly, it was about the adventures of real-life, extremely purchasable toys like Mr. Potato Head (voiced by Don Rickles) as well as fictional toy pals like space hero Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen) and cowboy throwback Woody (Tom Hanks). Toy Story soared over low expectations with animation so dazzling, revolutionary, and richly imagined that it felt like a form of magic. But Toy Story didn’t just look different and better than pretty much every animated movie ever made: It was equally sophisticated and satisfying in its storytelling. From the very beginning, Pixar was uniquely gifted at integrating cutting-edge technology with a Disney-like grasp on the emotional needs of the moviegoing public. People might have been skeptical of computer animation going into Toy Story, but it didn’t just single-handedly redeem CGI as a medium; it established it as a medium with the potential to be deeper, richer and greater than conventional animation in every conceivable way. With the exception of Nas’ Illmatic and Orson Welles’ Citizen Kane, debuts don’t get better than this. — NR

Stream Toy Story on Disney+

40. Who Framed Roger Rabbit? (1988)

The awesome power of executive producer Steven Spielberg, the most commercially successful filmmaker in the history of American film, as well as one of our greatest auteurs, made the impossible happen with 1988’s Who Framed Roger Rabbit. He brought together Disney and Warner Bros. and Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck, not to mention a slew of other legendary cartoon icons for a blisteringly bleak cartoon noir tale of lust, greed, murder, and public transportation.

Bob Hoskins should have won a godd*mn Nobel Prize, not just an Academy Award, for his hilarious and heartbreakingly real performance as tragic shamus Eddie Valiant, while Jessica Rabbit kickstarted puberty for multiple generations of horny young people. Christopher Lloyd’s Judge Doom, meanwhile, wasn’t just way too terrifying for a kid’s film; he’d be too scary for even the most intense adult horror film. Who Framed Roger Rabbit is nothing short of a miracle, the perfect fusion of cutting-edge technology and world-class storytelling. — NR

Stream Who Framed Roger Rabbit? on Disney+

39. Chicken Run (2000)

When it made the leap to big screen filmmaking with 2000’s Chicken Run, Aardman Animations maintained the droll wit and inveterate Britishness that distinguished its television output but added an extremely cinematic element of spectacle and adventure. Chicken Run is an extended riff on The Great Escape with chickens terrified of being slaughtered by evil farmers taking the place of Allied soldiers and a nefarious farmer couple assuming the roles occupied by the Nazis in the original film. Chicken Run is still the top-grossing stop-motion animated film of all time, so it is perhaps not surprising that a long-in-the-works sequel will be coming out on Netflix next year. — NR

Rent Chicken Run on Amazon Prime Video

38. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (2018)

Recently, superhero movies have been obsessed with exploring “the multiverse,” a comic book concept that offers a lot of creative opportunities but carries the risk of making things too complicated, obtuse, and self-referential for the average viewer to understand. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse totally avoided getting tangled in this web. Just as it states the motto that “anybody can wear the mask,” anybody can follow (and appreciate) one of the best movies in recent memory. Spider-Verse is zany, but it’s accessible to everyone, whether they’re thrilled to see a hero who looks like them, empathizing with midlife crises, or are just delighted to see Spider-Ham hit a bad guy with a big hammer. —JG

Stream Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse on fuboTV.

37. The Princess Bride (1987)

1987’s The Princess Bride was only a modest box-office success, but in the three and a half decades since its release, it has been so beloved and so ubiquitous that seemingly everyone has experienced it. It’s not unlike A Christmas Story in that respect. If people haven’t seen Rob Reiner’s effortlessly charming adaptation of William Goldman’s novel about fairy tales, childhood, innocence, storytelling, and imagination then they’ve undoubtedly processed it through memes, quotations, homage, parody, and imitations. Cary Elwes and Robin Wright became instant romantic icons as pure-hearted lovers, and they’re supported by a cast of ringers like Billy Crystal, Mandy Patinkin, Wallace Shawn, Christopher Guest, Andre the Giant, Carol Kane, and Peter Falk in perfectly cast roles. The Princess Bride is every bit as good as its sterling reputation suggests. It’s better than good; it’s perfect, an all-too-quotable contemporary classic that’s much more than just the source of a lot of hack bits on the Internet. — NR

Stream The Princess Bride on Disney+ or fuboTV

36. Finding Dory (2016)

Finding Dory can’t quite reach the heights (depths?) of its predecessor, Finding Nemo. That’s understandable, especially because far too often, franchises struggle when they promote a supporting comic relief character like Dory to a leading role. And yet Finding Dory is a charming dip back in the ocean, and Dory thrives rather than flounders as a protagonist, turning her previously funny memory issues into a surprisingly tender story about overcoming self-doubt and the unforgettable love parents have for their kids.

Stream Finding Dory on Disney+

35. Hook (1991)

Rufio! Rufio! Rufio! If chanting this character’s name is meaningless to you, it means you’ve never seen the greatest Peter Pan adaptation of all time, the Robin Williams epic Hook. Sure, this movie is dated and riddled with a general feeling of ’90s-ness. And yet, as far as “modern” takes on “classic” kids stories go, Hook is one of the most unique. Also, possibly, Steven Spielberg’s most underrated movie, ever. — RB

Stream Hook on AMC+ or Philo

34. The Secret of NIMH (1982)

Legendary animator Don Bluth made his directorial debut with an adaptation of Robert C. O’Brien’s Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH. What’s great about Bluth and particularly this film is that he never underestimates the intelligence of children and handily blends fantasy with the reality of the world, even if that reality is dark and scary. The central character, a mouse named Mrs. Brisby (changed from the books to avoid copyright concerns with the sports disc) undertakes a quest to save her sick child Timothy, discovering a colony of technologically advanced rats, and the secret of her deceased husband, rodents who were all part of experiments at the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). It’s an impressive reveal and makes quite the statement on animal testing. Yet despite these larger implications, Bluth never loses sight of Mrs. Frisby’s heroic journey. — RN

Stream The Secret of NIMH on TUBI, Pluto TV, The Roku Channel, or MGM+

33. The Red Balloon (1956)

The argument for this movie as one of the best kids movies ever is threefold. First, it’s a great way to segue kids from animated movies into live action. Second, it’s a movie about sentient balloons — and where are you going to see that? Third, and foremost, some of the best movies in the history of cinema are silent films and few adults even get exposure to this medium ever anymore. If the Red Balloon is the only silent film your kid ever sees it will be a fine one. — RB

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32. Princess Mononoke (1997)

Another absolute classic from writer-director Hayao Miyazaki, Princess Mononoke spins an exciting, enthralling, and thought-provoking tale about Ashitaka, a prince in ancient Japan who becomes caught up in a clash between humans who are destroying a lush and wondrous forest and the forest’s spirits determined to protect it. The messages are unmistakable and the animation and music are perfect. This one is recommended for kids who are a bit older, and we also suggest going with the English-language version, which is bolstered by a Neil Gaiman script and the voices of Minnie Driver, Billy Crudup, Billy Bob Thornton, Claire Danes, Jada Pinkett Smith, and others. — IS

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31. Home Alone (1990)

Pure mischief. That’s the name of the game in Chris Columbus’ Home Alone, which made Macaulay Culkin a child star and launched half a dozen sequels that never lived up to the first one. As a kid, there was always a bit of wish fulfillment in Home Alone, not only in the premise of being left to your own devices to defend your home from burglars but the fact that the burglars, Harry and Marv, so memorably played by Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern had a true sense of threat about them. They so clearly came from the adult world, something the Columbus-less sequels frequently forgot. Home Alone challenges pre-conceived notions of children’s comedies by integrating a true sense of danger within its holiday cheer and hijinks. — RN

Stream Home Alone on Disney+

30. Frozen (2013)

Parents be warned: One of the best parts of Frozen is also, potentially, the worst part. “Let It Go” is a tremendous song — perhaps the best of the modern Disney era — but it’s also a tremendous earworm, so be careful before firing up Disney+. Luckily, there’s far more to Frozen than just Idina Menzel’s pipes. The movie is a fun inversion of the classic Disney princess formula without any Shrek-like winks, and the sisterly bond between Elsa and Anna forms the warm heart at the core of this frosty tale.

Stream Frozen on Disney+

29. The Transformers: The Movie (1986)

The most transgressive and bizarrely mature animated film designed to just sell kids a bunch of expensive toys is easily The Transformers: The Movie. Not only does this movie teach kids healthy (and sad!) lessons about death, but it also contains an instantly relatable hero’s journey. Seeing Autobot Hot Rod (Judd Nelson) go from petulant risk-taker to bona fide leader is, still, somehow, inspiring. The rest of the voice talent is unreal. From Robert Stack to Leonard Nimoy, Eric Idle, and yes, Orson Welles as a planet that eats other planets, it’s hard to find an ’80s kids movie having more fun than Transformers.

But then you remember the soundtrack. Weird Al is there, but every ’80s kid will always remember the Stan Bush banger “The Touch.” Will contemporary kids feel like this movie still has got the power? The answer is a big yes. — RB

Stream The Transformers: The Movie on YouTube

28. 9 (2009)

Think of 9 as your kid’s gateway drug to the post-apocalypse. What is without a doubt the scariest movie on this list (you will want to wait until they’re closer to 10 years old for this one), 9 is also the film to introduce them to some of the deepest joys you’ll find in adult movies — lost civilizations, seat jumps, chases, and suspenseful soundtrack (which includes probably the most horrifying use of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” in a film to date). It also has an equally colorful cast of characters that includes killer robots (one with a doll head), sweet burlap puppets infused with the soul of humanity, and Christopher Plummer. While there is chair-gripping suspense and a share of death (but no gore), it is all tempered by the fact that hope reigns supreme throughout this movie — and wins out in the end. This is, after all, a flick for kids. — TT

Stream 9 on Max

27. Inside Out (2015)

Kids have big feelings. And, one of the hardest things about parenting is unpacking those feelings. It’s hard to think of a better kids movie that actually addresses this. Inside Out feels like it could be the best Pixar movie ever. The only reason it’s maybe not is simply that it’s so meta. Still, absolutely essential and comfort food for all those kids who live out loud. —RB

Stream Inside Out on Disney+

26. Babe (1995)

That’ll do pig! No childhood is complete without a pig-centric adventure, and it’s really tough to find a more perfect pig movie than Babe. There are certainly some sad aspects of this film, and the possibility that it may turn certain children into vegetarians. (Which, arguably, is the best-case scenario!) Can you really say you’ve parented if your kids haven’t seen Babe? — RB

Stream Babe on Max

25. Jurassic Park (1993)

It’s one of the greatest movies of all time, as everyone reading this already knows. For dinosaur-loving kids of a certain age, there’s no better choice. The wonder of Steven Spielberg’s film, the way in which it brought dinosaurs to life onscreen like never before, and the cast of memorable characters comprising both adults and children, its balance of science and thrills, have allowed Jurassic Park to remain popular almost 20 years later. While it can be quite intense for younger viewers, for those old enough to appreciate a jolt, Jurassic Park is a foundational film experience. — RN

Stream Jurassic Park on Tubi or Peacock

24. Kiki’s Delivery Service (1989)

There’s a wonderful amount of whimsy and charm in this, one of Hayao Miyazaki’s best films, but although Kiki is soaring through the sky on a flying broomstick, the stakes are remarkably grounded. Kiki is a young witch out in the big city for the first time, trying to find her first job and a place in the big beautiful world. It’s a coming-of-age story with a great role model at its center. Ultimately, Kiki’s is about a good kid who just wants to work hard and help people — something that’s as magical as any talking cat. — JG

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23. Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey (1993)

Kids and parents alike have delighted in Homeward Bound for nearly three decades. Three house pets — Chance (Michael J. Fox, who serves as narrator), a standoffish bulldog; Shadow (Don Ameche), an old but experienced and sage golden retriever; and Sassy (Sally Field), a spoiled Himalayan cat — become separated from their families and think they’ve been abandoned. And so they head out on a dangerous trek through the wilderness, hoping to make it home safely. That means toughing out the terrain and weather and outsmarting a bear and a mountain lion. There’s comedy and action, lessons about friendship and family, and it’s all shot live-action, which is great... except for the fact that animals’ mouths don’t move when they speak! - IS

Stream Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey on Disney+

22. The Hobbit (1977)

For many ’80s and ’90s kids, The Hobbit was our first introduction to The Lord of the Rings. While directors Arthur Rankin Jr. and Jules Bass were primarily known for their holiday specials, they created a lasting impression on budding fantasy fans with their adaptation of Tolkien’s novel and the unlikely hero Bilbo Baggins, winningly voiced by Orson Bean. With beautiful character designs, a deft balance of humor and tension — including a great adaptation of the iconic “Riddles in the Dark” scene, and some lovely songs by Maury Laws, The Hobbit is a formative fantasy experience that surpasses the notion of a TV movie. — RN

Rent The Hobbit on Amazon Prime Video

21. Star Wars (1977)

The only Star Wars movie your kids actually need to see is the one that doesn’t require a subtitle. Although the artistry and expansiveness of the Star Wars galaxy get more varied and perhaps deeper in the subsequent sequels, prequels, and spinoffs, the original film (later subtitled Episode IV: A New Hope) is a wonderful stand-alone adventure. The massiveness of Star Wars as a phenomenon, has, perhaps, over the years, diminished the potency of the first movie. But the movie was an instant classic for a reason, and more than any other Star Wars film plays out like a true children’s classic. — RB

Stream Star Wars on Disney+

20. Paddington (2014)

The first live-action film based on the beloved books of the same name is improbably not rated G, but instead, PG. Why, you may ask? The answer is, that Nicole Kidman plays an evil taxidermist who also shoots people and animals with a silencer gun that fires knock-out darts. Her goal is to stuff Paddington, and frankly, Kidman sells this performance perhaps better than any Bond villain. The rest of the cast is equally amazing, including Hugh Bonneville (you know, the dad from Downtown Abbey) and Sally Hawkins (The Shape of Water). Ben Whishaw (Q from the Daniel Craig Bond films) nails the voice of Paddington, while secret MVP Peter Capaldi lurks around as a hilarious nosy neighbor.

Although Paddington 2 is the better film, you have to start here. And, if Paddington was your child’s first “live-action” movie, you’d be doing something right. This film prepares your kid for literally every single action movie trope, in the most delightful way possible. — RB

Stream Paddington on Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, or Tubi

19. Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)

After roaring out of the gate with Chicken Run, still, its top grossing feature, the tea-sipping, crumpet-eating, exquisitely English geniuses over at Aardman Animations gave their most beloved icons, genial inventor Wallace and his loyal pooch Gromit, their very own feature film vehicle with 2005’s beguiling Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit. The result was spooky in the most innocent, child-friendly manner possible, a lovable horror comedy with a delightfully droll wit. And in a world of bloated runtime, Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit runs a lean 85 minutes. This Academy-Award-winning stop-motion animated gem makes a very big impression in a minimal amount of time. — NR

Stream Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit on Peacock

18. The Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)

At times, Fantastic Mr. Fox feels a little too peculiar and specifically grown-up to be a “kids” movie, due to the combination of Roald Dahl’s unique storytelling and Wes Anderson’s singular aesthetic. Yet, that kind of makes it perfect, in an unexpected way, as a kids movie, because sometimes kids act like weird little adults. They deserve to see a stop-motion George Clooney fox living a charming little life and engaging in some delectable high jinks. It’s a twee, animal Ocean’s Eleven. — JG

Stream The Fantastic Mr. Fox on Disney+ or Hulu

17. Superman (1978)

The film that started it all. If your kid is a fan of superhero movies, well it all started here with Richard Donner’s Superman. From the iconic performances by Christopher Reeve, Margot Kidder, and Gene Hackman as Superman, Lois Lane, and Lex Luthor respectively, and John Williams’ iconic score, Donner presented Superman as an American fable. It’s light on action, perhaps more so than today’s young audiences may expect, and heavier on romance than young audiences may want, but there’s no doubt that there’s still a thrilling sense of wonder in seeing Superman soar the skies and Reeve provide the warmth and integrity you’d want your kids to aspire to. — RN

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16. The NeverEnding Story (1984)

In between giving the world the acclaimed German World War II submarine masterpiece Das Boot and the Secret Service-intensive thrillers In the Line of Fire and Air Force One, Teutonic auteur Wolfgang Petersen tried his hand at children’s fare with a beloved 1984 adaptation of Michael Ende’s novel of the same name. If it were re-booted today, The Neverending Story would be filled with soulless CGI, but it was fortunate enough to be created at a time when practical effects and puppetry ruled. Petersen’s marvelous meditation on the life-changing power of storytelling and imagination follows an insecure boy who gets sucked into the titular book about a realm called Fantasia threatened by a malevolent force known as The Darkness in an increasingly literal level, eventually becoming a player in the action himself. It’s a film of darkness and wonder that isn’t afraid to go to some very grim, potentially traumatic places AND it has a banger of a New Wave theme song. Despite the title The Neverending Story ends after 94 minutes, and the Neverending Story franchise ended after three movies, the last of which went direct to video. — NR

Rent The NeverEnding Story on Amazon Prime Video

15. Spirited Away (2001)

Fans of legendary Japanese animator Hayao Miyazaki consider Spirited Away to be one of his three best films, if not the best. Deservedly so. It’s a vivid fantasy, filled with wonder and some scares, about a 10-year-old girl, Chihiro, who unexpectedly steps into a fantasy world where her parents are pigs and a witch steals her name. The animation is rich and brilliant, and the story celebrates nature, family, perseverance, friendship, and the bravery of a young girl. While the film works fine in the original Japanese version, younger kids might prefer the American iteration, which features the voices of Daveigh Chase, John Ratzenberger, Suzanne Pleshette, Jason Marsden, Susan Egan, David Ogden Stiers, and Michael Chiklis. — IS

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14. The Iron Giant (1999)

After a distinguished television career that included The Critic, King of the Hill, and The Simpsons during its 1990s golden age, Brad Bird made an extraordinary directorial debut with the 1999 adaptation of Ted Hughes’ The Iron Giant. Set against the backdrop of the Cold War, The Iron Giant captures, with a Spielbergian sense of wonder, the complicated, intense emotions that ensue when a lonely little boy in 1950s Maine discovers and befriends a massive robot from outer space voiced by Vin Diesel. The film’s plot pits otherworldly innocence against the worldly malevolence of a government and a military that do not trust anything they cannot control. The movie was a big flop at the time of its release but has acquired a huge cult following. Its title character was even bizarrely and crudely roped into the migraine-inducing inanity of Ready Player One as a futuristic warrior and showed up in Space Jam: A New Legacy, a project as mercenary and corrupt as The Iron Giant is pure. The Iron Giant was similarly an early indication that Vin Diesel’s true gift lie in voicing sweet-natured creatures from outer space, not in playing human beings in live-action films. — NR

Rent The Iron Giant on Amazon Prime Video

13. Finding Nemo (2003)

Technically, this is a list of the best kids movies. Finding Nemo definitely qualifies by that, as it’s a refreshingly beautiful adventure across the sea full of important life lessons and fun characters like a great white shark who wants to change his diet and a tubular sea turtle. However, Finding Nemo is really for all the dads out there, as Marlin’s journey to find his son — and eventually find a balance between wanting to keep him safe and letting him explore and grow up — is extremely powerful even if you’re a landlubber.

Stream Finding Nemo on Disney+

12. The Great Mouse Detective (1986)

Mercifully featuring only one musical number, The Great Mouse Detective immediately precedes the Disney renaissance that began with The Little Mermaid in 1987. Based on the children’s book series Basil of Baker Street, which of course, were pastiches of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes stories and novels, The Great Mouse Detective may be one of the most accessible and smart movie versions of Sherlock Holmes ever. As talking mice go in the great pantheon of kids movies, Basil is deeply underrated. —RB

Stream The Great Mouse Detective on Disney+

11. Mary Poppins (1964)

They don’t call it a jolly holiday with Mary for nothing. Thankfully deviating from the P.L. Travers books series of the same name, this Disney classic is, perhaps, the most timeless blend of live-action and animation ever. There are a few things in this that are a bit questionable for contemporary audiences, but luckily, the movie version of Poppins isn’t overtly racist like the book version.

Mary Poppins is a great example that often, the book is worse and the movie is better. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious had nothing to do with books, but in the movie, it’s perfect. Julie Andrews is much better in this than she ever was in The Sound of Music, mostly because Mary Poppins is a wonderfully flippant character, sort of like an unpredictable wizard fused with Doctor Who. And, no matter what anybody tells you, Dick Van Dyke is freaking hilarious in this. — RB

Stream Mary Poppins on Disney+

10. E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial (1982)

It’s no surprise that Steven Spielberg’s beautiful tale of a young boy who befriends a stranded alien from outer space broke the record for the highest-grossing film of all time and became a global phenomenon. In comparison to the director’s previous work, E.T. is intimate and personal. But thanks in large part to John Williams’ sweeping score, cinematographer Allen Daviau’s picturesque shot composition and lighting, screenwriter Melissa Mathison’s ability to perfectly tap into the emotions and vernacular of suburban youth — “It was nothing like that, penis breath!” — and of course, Spielberg’s direction, which is simultaneously bold and careful, the movie manages to feel like a big summer blockbuster, despite its relative quietness. As for the titular extra-terrestrial, Carlo Rambaldi and his team brilliantly created an alien that is simultaneously off-putting to look at, at least initially, while also being undeniably cute and impossible to look away from. When you add in the brilliant performances by the cast and the breathtaking effects work by Industrial Light & Magic, you have a true cinematic masterpiece for children of all ages. — CG

Rent E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial on Amazon Prime Video

9. Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989)

When he made his directorial debut with 1989’s Honey, I Shrunk the Kids, Joe Johnston was already an Academy Award winner due to his special effects work on Raiders of the Lost Ark and a legend due to his work helping create the look of iconic Star Wars characters like Boba Fett. That turned out to be the perfect background to direct Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. The surprise blockbuster updated the sunny innocence and all-American wholesomeness of live-action 1960s Disney fare like The Absent-Minded Professor with cutting-edge technology and the latest in special effects. Rick Moranis was perfectly typecast as a Poindexter dad who accidentally shrinks his children and must save his family from being squashed like bugs. Honey, I Shrunk the Kids had some help at the box office from Tummy Trouble, the first Roger Rabbit short. But even without the help of Robert Zemeckis’ rascally rabbit, this would still be a winner. — NR

Stream Honey, I Shrunk the Kids on Disney+

8. The Incredibles (2004)

The Marvel Cinematic Universe is making a Fantastic Four movie, but honestly why bother? Pixar already made the best Fantastic Four movie, even if it’s technically not Marvel’s First Family. Younger kids may identify with Dash, the headstrong speedster, and teens might find a connection with how Violet feels like she’s invisible even when she’s not using her powers.

Parents probably see aspects of themselves in Mr. Incredible and Elasti-Girl as they navigate their relationship and their own personal desires. Above all, though, The Incredibles is about how these four (and Jack-Jack) work as a family. Well, that and some extremely stylish crime-fighting. — JG

Stream The Incredibles on Disney+

7. Pee-wee’s Big Adventure (1985)

A year before audiences were welcomed into his puppet-filled playhouse on Saturday mornings, Paul Reubens’ lovably quirky Pee-wee Herman character made his big-screen debut under the direction of newcomer Tim Burton. On the surface, Pee-wee’s Big Adventure is an epic and unforgettable, highly quotable road trip movie — “I know you are, but what am I?” — complete with trips to the Alamo, a high-speed chase through the Warner Bros. movie lot, and performance of The Champs’ 1958 hit “Tequila” in a biker bar. But at its core, Big Adventure is a hilarious and surprisingly touching love story between a man and his bicycle. Do you want to talk about friendship goals? Find someone who looks at you like Pee-wee looks at his Schwinn. — CG

Rent Pee-wee’s Big Adventure on Amazon Prime Video

6. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

Despite his possessory credit, Tim Burton did not direct The Nightmare Before Christmas, nor did he write the screenplay, although he did dream up the story and characters. Yet the film nevertheless represents the purest representation of Burton’s adorably gothic aesthetic. Burton’s stop-motion-animated musical finds Halloween, in the lanky, unforgettable form of Pumpkin King Jack Skellington, staging a confused takeover of Christmas that results in mischief rather than merriment and monstrosities rather than mirth. Fueled by Danny Elfman’s fiendishly catchy songs, Nightmare Before Christmas has been lovingly realized down to a molecular level. It’s The Grinch That Stole Christmas by way of Charles Addams while feeling throughout like a creative X-ray of Burton’s soul. Like the best Christmas fare, it feels like The Nightmare Before Christmas has always been with us; it just needed Burton to pluck it down from the ether for the world to enjoy every Christmas and Halloween. The Nightmare Before Christmas is a Christmas and Halloween classic that occupies a massive place in our culture and the childhoods of countless theatrical weirdos because it’s ultimately just that good. Nightmare Before Christmas might have spawned multiple generations of Hot Topic mall goths but don’t hold that against it! — NR

Stream The Nightmare Before Christmas on Disney+

5. Ratatouille (2007)

Brad Bird followed up two of the greatest children’s films ever made in The Iron Giant and The Incredibles with another all-time winner in Ratatouille. In a bravura performance that taps into the legendary comedian’s status as a passionate fan and enthusiast as well as a true artist, Patton Oswalt is the voice and the soul of Remy, a Parisian rat who dreams of becoming a gourmet chef and is able to realize those aspirations with the help of a human helper/sidekick/vessel. Peter O’Toole is equally perfect as Anton Ego, a feared critic with a brutal pen but an underlying streak of empathy and understanding. In the best Pixar tradition, Ratatouille is funny and beautifully animated but also deeply moving and surprisingly profound. — NR

Stream Ratatouille on Disney+

4. The Dark Crystal (1982)

With five successful seasons of The Muppet Show under his belt, Jim Henson did the unthinkable: He pulled the plug on his highly successful primetime variety show and turned his attention to writing and directing an expansive fantasy-adventure film, told entirely with puppets. It would take several years (and two Muppet films) before The Dark Crystal made its way to theaters, but thanks in large part to the world-building and creature designs of artist Brian Froud, Henson and co-director Frank Oz successfully created one a modern myth that continues to endure. Although the film wasn’t a runaway hit when it arrived on screens in 1982, its cult following has grown through the decades, with the film even spawning an Emmy Award-winning Netflix series, The Dark Crystal: The Age of Resistance, in 2019. Even Aughra, the film’s all-knowing spiritual mother figure, might not have seen that coming. — CG

Stream The Dark Crystal on Tubi, Pluto TV, Peacock, The Roku Channel, or PLEX

3. My Neighbor Totoro (1988)

Disney movies might be magical, but Hayao Miyazaki (aka Studio Ghibli) movies pull off honest-to-god magic tricks. My Neighbor Totoro’s enchantment stems from Miyazaki telling a story convincingly and surreally through the eyes of a young child, Mei. As such, a sad plot — two girls leave their sick mother behind in a hospital for a new house in the country with an understandably absent father — turns on the joyful and innocent imaginings of Mei. A gleefully trippy movie is the result, filled with living cat buses, mischievous soot gremlins, and a round furry flying creature that grows to be as big as a house — and the most supportive friend a struggling kid could ever ask for. — TT

Stream My Neighbor Totoro on Max

2. Paddington 2 (2017)

Paddington was winsome, entertaining, funny, and a visual treat and Paddington 2 is even better — and less scary. Less scary is a good thing, since Nicole Kidman terrified young kids who saw the first film. This time around, everyone’s favorite, super-polite British bear (voiced by Ben Whishaw) is steadfast in his determination to find the perfect 100th birthday gift for his Aunt Lucy. It leads to wild misadventures full of oohs and aahs, plenty of laughs (scripted jokes and visual gags alike), and oodles of affection. And while kids won't necessarily notice or care, adults will love seeing some of the United Kingdom’s greatest actors letting loose, among them Hugh Grant (hamming it up as an... actor), Hugh Bonneville, Sally Hawkins, Brendan Gleeson, Julie Walters, Jim Broadbent, Peter Capaldi, Tom Conti, and Joanna Lumley. — IS

Rent Paddington 2 on Amazon Prime Video

1. The Wizard of Oz (1939)

It may seem like cheating to give an extremely famous movie that is nearly 90 years old the top slot. But. Come on. Everything comes from The Wizard of Oz. Great songs. A cutesy team-up, an unfaithful — but wonderful — adaptation of an already beloved kids book. Great costumes. And more and more and more. Nobody truly hates The Wizard of Oz, even if they say they do. The flying monkeys and the witch are scary as hell for the very little ones, perhaps even more so than Darth Vader.

But, in many ways, all of cinematic pop culture revolves around The Wizard of Oz. Parents reference this movie without remembering they’re referencing it. (“I’m melting! I’m melting!”) It makes instantly adorable kids’ costumes, instills reasonable fear of extreme weather into children, and perhaps best of all, teaches kids to distrust authority figures who don’t give straight answers. Even when you get to Oz, things will not be what you expect, a lesson that gets more and more poignant year after year. — RB

Stream The Wizard of Oz on Max

Back on November 27, 1977, kids watching network TV were introduced to the “greatest adventure” of all time. Although the original Star Wars blew everyone’s minds that summer and forever altered the way we think about blockbuster movies, the Jules Bass and Arthur Rankin Jr. version of The Hobbit quietly pushed the most famous fantasy origin story of all into the mainstream. 45 years later, the impact of the animated Hobbit cannot be overstated.

Clocking at just 77 minutes (and apparently, not an hour and a half as many remember it), the animated version of The Hobbit from Rankin and Bass captures the breezy and jaunty quality of J.R.R. Tolkien’s 1937 children’s novel The Hobbit. Of course, even by 1977, The Hobbit had been retroactively relegated to “prequel” status, making it something of an underdog next to the sprawling, and mega-popular Lord of the Rings trilogy of novels, which had been published, originally from 1954 to 1955. Before this, in 1951, Tolkien had revised The Hobbit, to make it more closely aligned with the spirit of The Lord of the Rings, making the slightly more childish version of the book a historical memory.

However, the 1977 animated Hobbit, firmly took the world of Middle-earth and made the adventure for children. With their experiences on other animated kids’ specials like Frosty the Snowman, Rankin and Bass upped their game significantly for The Hobbit, mostly because they had amazing source material to work with. While hardcore Tolkien heads are very aware of the various songs throughout the book versions of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, for the casual viewer in 1977, the staggering amount of music in the animated Hobbit might have seemed weird. However, it was Jules Bass himself who adapted a good chunk of Tolkien’s lyrics directly from the book and then assisted composer Maury Laws, in making it all happen.

The famous Glenn Yarbrough-sung folksy ballad, “The Greatest Adventure,” was, in fact, the only song that was original to the movie, and not derived from the pages of The Hobbit. This single fact is the microcosm that demonstrates the overall brilliance of this version of The Hobbit; it’s both wildly faithful to the source material, but also morphs into a significantly separate adaptation. Just as Bilbo’s stories of his meeting with Gollum later turned out to be unreliable, the 1977 Hobbit succeeded in turning Tolkien’s book into a modern folk tale. Depending on who was retelling the story, the story could change. Before 1977, this hadn’t happened yet with The Hobbit, and other than Tolkien’s revisions, alternate versions of the story simply couldn’t exist.

As scholars and students of folk tales and fairy tales will tell you; what ensures that a story survives isn’t just the preservation of the text, but instead, the retellings of a story is what creates immortality. In the time before the printed word, this was accomplished through the oral tradition, but in the late 20th century, film adaptations began to do something similar.

With its unforgettable animation style, brilliant pacing, hilarious moments, excellent casting, and yes, whimsically endearing music, The Hobbit was the first of its kind: A new take on what had already been an instant classic in 1937. Like the film version of The Wizard of Oz, the 1977 Hobbit sublimated a wonderful kids’ book into a brilliant piece of modern animation. Today, we might think of the 1977 Hobbit as retro. But the reason why it was so important is that, when it comes to amazing fantasy adaptions, the future began right here.

You can rent The Hobbit on Amazon Prime Video right here. It is also included in Fatherly’s 100 Best Kids Movies Ever.

All good things must come to an end, or so the saying goes, and when you’re a kid that’s never more true than when late August rolls around and summer vacation draws to a close. Going back to school means an end to unscheduled days of fun in the sun, but it can also be the start of something good. The first day of school can be the first time a kid meets their new best friend, or it can kick off an important semester of learning and discovery. It can also be, well, not so good. Sometimes, back-to-school is hard.

This is why families sometimes turn to our greatest TV shows for guidance. TV isn’t the perfect teacher, but it can help families reflect on their own experiences in cathartic ways. Here are 10 of the best back-to-school episodes, an assortment that captures the highs and lows of stepping back into the classroom — or stepping into a new one for the first time. These episodes are listed here roughly in how young the target audience is for each. So, we’ll start with toddlers and end with high schoolers!

“A Visit to School,” Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood (Age: Toddler to Kindergarten)

As one might expect from a series based on Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood, “A Visit to School” showcases the same gentle understanding and straightforward communication the beloved children’s show host excelled at. If you’re feeling scared about doing something new — like going to the first day of school — talking it out and preparing for the new experience is a great way to feel more confident. It’s actionable advice.

Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood streams on Amazon Prime Video.

“Arthur and the Real Mr. Ratburn: and “Arthur’s First Day,” Arthur (1st grade to 3rd grade )

These two Arthur episodes, from the very start and very end of the long-running PBS series, show how every back-to-school comes with its own challenges — and how all of them can be overcome. In the first episode, Arthur and Buster are nervous about their new third-grade teacher, Mr. Ratburn, until they learn he’s not actually scary at all. Then, 15 real years later, Arthur’s excited to be moving on to 4th grade, until he realizes his best friend Buster won’t be in his class anymore. But, that doesn’t mean that they’ll stop being friends.

Arthur is streaming on Amazon Prime with PBS Kids.

“The New Kid,” Recess (2nd grade to 4th grade)

The Disney Channel series Recess is focused on a group of elementary school friends, but not every member of “the gang” was in the first episode. It’s not until the second episode that Gus Griswald shows up at school. Recess has a great way of heightening normal playground politics and Gus’ struggle to escape the “new kid” label is one that anybody who has transferred schools probably empathizes with — and there’s a very happy ending. Not only does Gus get his actual name back and ditch the “new kid” moniker, but he also gets a group of fast friends.

Recess is streaming on Disney+.

“I Am Karma,” Karma’s World (3rd grade to 5th grade)

The first episode of the Netflix kids' show Karma’s World has the titular character excited about her first day of middle school, only to initially be met with a bully who makes fun of her name Things end up all right, as she makes a friend and the bully eventually apologizes, and the episode offers a more representational take of the back-to-school story.

Karma’s World streams on Netflix.

“First Day & Lockers,” Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide (5th grade to middle school)

The series premiere of this Nickelodeon sitcom understood how seemingly little things can have big stakes when you’re a kid. For instance, locker placement. The main trio of friends, Ned, Moze, and Cookie, all work to stake out a good (or at least a not-stinky) locker in this episode, as they’ll be stuck there for the rest of the year.

Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide streams on Netflix.

“Back to School Blues,” Full House (junior high/middle school)

DJ Tanner’s first day of junior high does not go well, and not just because she’s accidentally dressed just like her teacher, which is just about the least cool thing you can do. She’s also feeling less developed than her classmates, and she only has one class with her friend Kimmy. But, “Back to School Blues” knows that a first day of school is always followed by a second day of school, and DJ (with some guidance for Danny) returns the next day with a good attitude and a little more age-appropriate outfit.

Full House streams on Max.

“Back 2 School,” Boy Meets World (Middle School/High School)

Cory and Shawn’s first day of school is exactly as melodramatic as you’d expect from Boy Meets World, but’s also a pretty heavy look at bullying and brotherly bonds, as Eric stands up for his younger bro even though the “cool” politics of having a younger sibling in the same school as you are fraught, at best. And, Boy Meets World gets to keep the sitcom status quo while also shaking things up with the reveal that Mr. Feely has been promoted to be the principal of their new school.

Boy Meets World streams on Disney+.

“First Days,” Modern Family (High School)

Most back-to-school episodes are focused, understandably, on the kids who are stepping back into the classroom. But, it’s a big day for parents, too, and this Season 5 episode of Modern Family focuses more on parents Phil and Gloria as they come to grips with the fact that Luke and Manny are growing up!

Modern Family streams on Peacock.

“Back to the Hellmouth,” Buffy the Vampire Slayer (High School)

OK, chances are the average student doesn’t need to list “vampires” as one of their concerns on the first day of school. But, even if Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s premiere episode isn’t as relatable as some of the other entries on this list, it’s still a great back-to-school episode. Sometimes school sucks, and sometimes it sucks blood.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer streams on Hulu.

For over 30 years, Goosebumps books have scared children silly. A gateway for children to step into the world of horror novels, this R.L. Stine mega-franchise has maintained its spot as one of the best-selling book series of all time. These books combined just the right amount of kid-friendly spookiness with a dash of humor, complete with twist endings that always left readers demanding more.

Goosebumps is no stranger to screen adaptations, including a four-season live-action series on Fox Kids in the mid-90s, and a pair of movies with Jack Black from a few years ago. This Halloween season, Goosebumps is back with an all-new live-action show streaming on Disney+ and Hulu, promising more mature frights while remaining faithful to the original material. This series follows five small-town high-school kids investigating the death of a teen from three decades prior, whose home the new English teacher has just moved into.

As opposed to its 90’s counterpart, this modern adaptation will be a spine-tingling 10-part mini-series, with the first five chapters dropping on October 13, and subsequent episodes added weekly. Instead of transforming a single book into a self-contained 30-minute mini-movie, the new series takes inspiration from them, inserting those elements into the overarching narrative across the duration of the show.

According to an official press release from Scholastic, the show draws elements from five of the books, but the recently revealed titles for the episodes show nearly all of them evoke fan favorites from across the 62 original books, with links across the entire 230+ books in this expansive franchise.

Which Goosebumps books can viewers expect to see in the new show? Readers beware – you’re in for a scare!

“Say Cheese and Die!”

Throughout the trailer, we see Miles McKenna as James and Zack Morris as Isaiah causing trouble with a Polaroid camera. The story that develops is taken from the fourth Goosebumps book, which shares the same name as the episode (a trend throughout most of these titles).

A group of friends discover a cursed camera in a rundown house, but instead of snapping a pic of the moment, it predicts a grim future for whoever is photographed. Scary movies and cameras are always a bad mix, no matter if it’s for photos or videos. It’s also a reminder – never take things you find in decrepit abandoned houses, unless you want to be a character in an R.L. Stine book, and you know how they tend to end up.

“The Haunted Mask”

Seen briefly in the trailer is a lifelike human face attached to a slab of wood. It’s a mask, but just any kind. It’s a recurring haunted object seen throughout the Goosebumps franchise. These self-aware parasitic masks were created by a mysterious shopkeeper, hungry to be worn so they can completely take over the body of the wearer.

“The Haunted Mask” was the 11^th book in the series and is among the most popular for adaptations into different media. In addition to being one of the few books to have a direct sequel (“The Haunted Mask II”), the masks made an appearance in the recent live-action movies, were an item found in the 2015 video game, and returned to the books over a decade later in “The Scream of the Haunted Mask.”

What tied them all together was Carly Beth Caldwell, the child who defeated them in the first entry of the saga back in 1993. Don’t be shocked if that name comes up once again in this new show!

“The Cuckoo Clock of Doom”

Cuckoo clocks are a classic trope in horror, loud pendulous machinery that lulls the audience into a false sense of security, right on time for a jump scare leaping out of the furniture. In the 28^th Goosebumps book, “The Cuckoo Clock of Doom,” flipped that cliché is flipped on its head by instead becoming a sinister time-travel device that could go years into the past, and even undo the existence of people.

In the trailer for the new series, James and Isiah were seen playing with the cursed camera, but the repercussions of that might not have been revealed. The following scene shows a cluster of those two characters in a cave, meaning those two might be involved in some time-altering dilemmas thanks to the clock.

“Go Eat Worms”

The 21^st Goosebumps book was a play on the 1973 classic kids’ book by Thomas Rockwell, “How to Eat Fried Worms.” The exception was that the main character in Stine’s version wasn’t paid $50 to devour the wriggling bugs, and instead “supernaturally” found their way into clothing and food.

While the true cause of this ruckus wasn’t actually revenge-seeking worms, the book ended with an enormous worm erupting from the ground, one of the more surreal third acts in the franchise. The trailer doesn’t show much in the way of insects, but get ready for some potential gross-outs if the show follows any scenes from the book, unless you don’t mind finding a half-bitten worm in your sandwich.

“Reader Beware” / “Give Yourself Goosebumps”

The fifth and seventh episodes of the new series aren’t named after a specific edition, but an entire sub-series in the Goosebumps literary universe. “Reader Beware” – besides being what R.L. Stine used to introduce some of the live-action ’90s shows – was the tagline for the “Give Yourself Goosebumps” imprint.

Totaling 50 volumes, these were interactive books that offered readers multiple ways to control the outcome of events. Imagine “Choose Your Own Adventure” books, but with titles like “Welcome to the Wicked Wax Museum,” “Escape from Camp Run-For-Your-Life,” and “Secret Agent Grandma.” A screenshot from this episode shows the kids enraptured with glossy, darkened eyes while listening to a mysterious figure read from a mysterious tome, so perhaps the teens will unwittingly be pulling the strings of some events unknown to them. Speaking of strings...

“Night of the Living Dummy”

There can’t be anything made under the slimy Goosebumps umbrella without Slappy the Dummy making an appearance!

The sixth and ninth episodes of the 2023 TV series share titles, with the latter being Part 2 of this story. All of the “Night of the Living Dummy” books star Slappy, the de facto face of the Goosebumps franchise. He debuted in the seventh book of the series in 1993, and returned multiple times over the years to torment more hapless children, including the movies and the 90s TV series. Slappy was so popular that this malevolent ventriloquist’s dummy even had his own series of books, “SlappyWorld.”

Puppets can often be a scary thing for kids, and Stine admitted in his autobiography that this character originated from his own aversion to puppets, specifically Pinocchio. He later took back control of that fear by using his own dummy to scare his brother, a formative moment for Stine en route to writing horror books.

“You Can’t Scare Me”

The 15^th book in the original series, “You Can’t Scare Me” has one of my favorite Tim Jacobus covers, giving readers a sneak peek at the terrors lurking inside its pages. This one features the Mud Monsters, reanimated corpses of town residents from yesteryear who drowned in a flood in Greene Forest, and rise up once a year to seek revenge on those who refused to help.

There are no murky dirt zombies to be found in the trailer, so this one may be in name only, but I wouldn’t be disappointed if I saw these turbid golems rampaging in the woods once during the series.

“Welcome to Horrorland”

The finale for the 2023 series brings us to another mainstay in the Goosebumps universe, HorrorLand!

This ghoulish theme park debuted in the sixteenth book in the series back in 1994 and is another popular part of the franchise. Run by the HorrorLand Horrors, sadistic monsters who can only be defeated by pinching them, this is far from the happiest place on earth. Their motto is “Where Nightmares Come to Life!” and features rides like The Coffin Cruise, Ferris Squeal, and Wheel of Misfortune.

Besides a direct sequel, this volume has been adapted over the years into a board game, comics, three different video games, a two-part episode in the 90’s show, and spun off into its own series that concluded by bringing notable characters from past books together to take on this haunted establishment. This marked the first serialized tale in Stine’s Goosebumps franchise, a fitting title to close out this new series, which also follows a single narrative amidst the disparate scary events these five high-schoolers contend with.

Earlier this May, a different R.L. Stine series, Just Beyond, was pulled from Disney+ along with many other shows and films during a period when many streaming platforms were culling their content. It seems like Disney is hedging their bets on this one, with a rollout that includes the first two episodes being shown as part of Freeform’s “31 Nights of Halloween” the same night it launches online. It’s possible the new Disney+ Goosebumps could be 2023’s version of Wednesday — a scary good time of destination TV with the right amount of nostalgia, ready to scare and entertain audiences of all ages.

Goosebumps streams on Disney+ and Hulu.

There are always characters in TV shows that viewers loathe, whether it be for legitimate reasons or personal preferences. The same goes for kids’ entertainment, and that sentiment persists even in something as wholesome as Bluey. If you were to make a tiered chart of characters from this popular Australian kids' cartoon on Disney+, chances are a high percentage of fans would rank these two characters at the bottom – Muffin and Judo. We’ll save the Heelers’ Chow Chow neighbor for another day, but Bluey’s cousin Muffin is a divisive one among its audience.

Muffin’s fiery temper has landed her in some hilarious situations, but it’s also made Bluey fans leery of her. Brash, spoiled, and tantrum-prone, many have compared this member of the extended Heeler family to Angelica Pickles from The Rugrats. It’s easy to take Muffin at face value as a prima donna, but she’s another case of Bluey showing kids and parents in a more realistic light.

Despite her behavior, Muffin is the prime example that no child is irredeemable, holding an uncomfortable mirror up to expose some unpleasant truths about raising kids, and certainly worth a deeper look at why she’s really one of the best in the show.

Is Muffin Really A Brat?

Even from her first appearance in season one’s “BBQ,” Muffin was a chaotic force of nature. She’s like a wild pony, unable to be tamed no matter how hard anyone tried unless she took the reins for her own sake. There are plenty of examples of Muffin’s bratty tendencies across the series, making it understandable why this kid has such a rough time getting fan support.

She was mildly antagonistic to her older cousin in “Horsey Ride,” being a know-it-all when her younger sister Socks was nomming on Bluey’s special toy. Season two showed us how demanding Muffin could be in “Charades” and “Library,” and she was just plain bonkers in “Sleepover,” but there’s no culprit to blame on that other than lack of sleep.

No shortage of episodes display the negative traits of this character, but many show her as a precocious child who just likes to have fun. Muffin was following Bluey’s play pattern when it came time to defend their nail salon in “Stumpfest”, the same as she did in “Backpackers.” She’s also genuinely well-mannered in the Christmas episodes, unrelated to Santa visiting their home, and has been a good big sister with her sibling, even helping the pup hold an ice pop in “Charades.” Even in season three’s “Pizza Girls,” Muffin was more about anarchy than she was about disobedience and stirring up trouble.

What’s the episode where Muffin became nice?

Muffin’s turning point occurs in season three’s “Faceytalk,” which is about the Heeler children virtually playing together on tablets. The episode begins with Bluey’s mum, Chilli, reminding Bluey not to hog the screen from Bingo, “because we know what happens when you hog.” While this may seem like a simple lesson, it falls into the deeper message of the episode as the plot progresses.

Muffin wants to finish drawing a hat on the Faceytalk screen before turning the tablet over to her little sister, Socks, and resists the boundary Stripe places on her screen time. Trixie, meanwhile, has washed her hands of the situation because she has “somewhere to be.” Remember, Muffin is around four years old here and is testing the limits of what she can and can’t do. There’s no intent of malice on her part since, in her mind, all Muffin wants is to doodle her pink cowboy hat. Stripe gets in the way of her finishing that task, but has difficulty being firm and following through with what he says. After Muffin absconds with Stripe’s phone, a wild chase through the house forces Trixie’s involvement and leads to a standoff with her husband instead of her unruly daughter.

“Faceytalk” isn’t just about Muffin’s problems with sharing, because the root of the problem starts with her parents. From the onset, the couple had communication problems regarding how to handle their kids and being on the same page with each other. In the last act of this episode, it all comes crashing down into the event that permanently changes who Muffin becomes.

The running theme through this story was “hogging” things, and Stripe felt like Trixie hogged the kids when it came to discipline, and undermined him, while Trixie felt Stripe wasn’t doing things the way she wanted and was therefore inferior to her decisions. In the end, the pair find unity in their parenting, and in doing so, start a cascade effect on Muffin that begins to see the character make some changes of her own.

The Redemption of Muffin Cupcake Heeler

A few episodes later, “Granny Mobile” brings us the threequel to the Granny series. This story marked the first time Muffin appeared since “Faceytalk,” and the difference in her personality is immediately noticeable.

The Heelers, with Muffin joining them for a playdate, visit their neighbor Doreen’s yard sale. After seeing a mobility scooter for sale, the girls decide to play Grannies, with Muffin playing the part of Gladys the “grouchy granny.” After spending some time as this character, Muffin tells Bluey she isn’t enjoying being so mean but is unsure how to play the part differently.

As Doreen struggles to not be such a pushover during her yard sale, a real grouchy granny shows up demanding to buy the scooter for a fraction of its actual price. Muffin, so lost in her elderly persona that Daniel Day-Lewis would be impressed, grouches back to the actual octogenarian, and uses her Muffin powers for good instead of evil, helping Doreen get four times the asking price for the vehicle.

Muffin’s good deeds showed her there was a time and place for her authoritative voice, acting as positive reinforcement that it’s possible to still follow the boundaries set by her parents while also maintaining her inner self. If anything, this proved Muffin can stand up for others the same way she used to for herself, advocating for the voiceless in whatever situation may occur. How this realization will be used in future stories remains to be seen, but the evolution of Muffin is clear now, and the road ahead is starting to look much less bumpy than her wild ride in “Sleepover.”

The Sweetest Muffin of Them All

It’s important to remember that Muffin is only around four years old by the end of season three, so her emotional development is still in flux as she learns about boundaries. If her behavior was like this as an adult, it would certainly be a call for alarm, but this is relatively normal for a preschooler.

Outgrowing this phase will naturally happen through her mum and dad collaboratively parenting their child, and supporting each other. It won’t be easy and there will likely be more disagreements as they figure things out, but seeing how quickly Muffin changed in season three, it proved it’s never too late to make positive changes that will enhance the attitude of their kid while improving communication with each other.

While some parents may fear their children reenacting the negative traits of Muffin, or others may label her “annoying,” watching someone like Muffin grow onscreen is vital for kids and adults to observe. It took some time, but Muffin is learning about the consequences of her actions while her parents strive to become better at their jobs as caregivers. If there are two things Muffin taught us, it’s that coconuts have water inside them, and it’s never too late to make a change.

Bluey is available to stream in the US on Disney+.

Bluey has become not only the biggest kids’ show on the planet but one of the most popular TV series worldwide. Period. First airing in its homeland of Australia in 2018, the realistic portrayals of parenting combined with the zany wholesome hijinks of a pair of adorable animal sisters means the show is loved equally by kids and adults.

But. Not every single moment of Bluey is available in the United States. A handful of episodes were eliminated by American censors and/or Disney. Some episodes have also been heavily censored and/or altered for American audiences. Why would a kids’ show be censored or have episodes banned? It’s a reasonable question and the easy answer is: it’s complicated. Sometimes it’s because a word has a different connotation in the U.S. than it does in Australia. Other times, there’s an innuendo, or topic U.S. censors have deemed inappropriate.

Across all seasons of Bluey, references to Australian-specific things were localized for American audiences, so we won’t spend too much time discussing those unless they were explicitly censored for serious implications (as serious as Bluey can be, anyway). Likewise, certain bits of dialogue were altered through the series for various reasons, and unless it was something provocative, this article will also glance past those changes.

So, without further ado, here’s a full list of censored and banned Bluey episodes as of May 2023, including one very recent body-shaming moment in Australia.

Update! This list now includes 2024 Disney+ versions of Season 3 episodes!

Bluey Season 1 — Censored Or Banned Episodes

The good info about the first season is currently no episodes are banned in the U.S. anymore. However, a few notable changes were made to them, some of which were censored and altered outside of Australia.

Censored: “Daddy Robot”

What was censored and why? A fairly wholesome and hilarious episode, this episode and two others from the first season, “Shaun” and “Teasing,” along with “Flat Pack” from Season 2 were censored due to the use of a racially-insensitive term that could refer to Aboriginal people. The ABC apologized and claimed it was not intended to refer to that abhorrent use of that word. “Daddy Robot” and the other episodes now use a nonsense word to replace the derogatory phrase.

Update: “Teasing” was restored on Disney+ when Bluey season 3B was added, replacing the offensive phrase with “Shoobi-doo-wop”.

Censored: “Fruit Bat”

What was censored and why? A scene where Bluey is playing “Penguins” in the bathroom was cut from the U.K. and the U.S., although it’s still referenced in the episode. The cut scene has Bluey sliding around the room, something that could be dangerous for a kid to do on a wet tiled floor.

Censored: “Taxi”

What was it censored and why? The episode ends in the U.S. with Bandit finally boarding his imaginary airplane, only to realize the reckless cab driver is also his pilot. However, the original version continues after that realization, with Bingo’s character pretending to throw up on Bandit’s lap. In the U.S. version, there is no vomit, and that’s why the episode ends earlier here than in the original one.

Censored: “Markets”

What was censored and why? As the girls are looking for a way to use some cash, they meet a unicorn handler (actually a pony with a horn on her head). Bluey is excited at this idea but learns only one of them can have a ride on her. Their disappointment quickly disappears after the unicorn drops a huge turd on the grass, leaving the kids fleeing as they scream their heads off. The turd does not exist in the Disney+ version.

This horse and her owner were seen again in the Season 3 episode “Pass the Parcel,” only this time the horse had already relieved itself. In the original version, her feces can be seen in a wide shot where the kids are playing the game, but the American version has an alternate version with the poo pile missing.

Censored: “Daddy Putdown”

What was censored and why? At one point in the episode, Bingo asks her dad how babies get into mom’s bellies. This line is cut in the U.S. version. Apparently, Disney doesn’t want pregnancy discussed in-depth in a show aimed at preschoolers.

Bluey Season 2 — Censored Or Banned Episodes

The second season brought a few new challenges to the show that needed resolutions, including one episode that will probably remain in the Disney vault until the end of time.

Banned: “Dad Baby”

Why was it banned? Similar to “Daddy Putdown,” this one is even more focused on pregnancy and carrying babies. The episode does not exist on Disney+ and in the U.S. at all. In it, Bandit (the dad) simulates what it’s like to give birth. The entire episode is banned as a result.

Will it be unbanned? Most likely never. Unlike “Family Meeting” (aka “the fart episode”) it appears this one is not coming to Disney+ anytime soon.

Altered: “Army”

Why was it changed? Jack seems to act like a child with ADHD. Although he is too young to comprehend the way his brain understands the world around him, he knows it works differently from others.

In the original version, Jack tells Rusty “There’s something wrong with me.” It was later revised to “There’s something going on with me.”

Censored: “Trains”

Why was it censored? Bluey hands Conductor Bandit something when he asks for her ticket that she instructs him to rub all over his face. In the original version, imaginary poop was passed to her dad. In America, the line was changed to transform that invisible heap into a slug.

Censored: “Flat Pack”

Why was it censored? We already discussed earlier how this one was hit with the same racially-insensitive insult heard in “Daddy Robot,” but there may be another reason this one was controversial.

The core of this episode is a whirlwind examination of the cycle of life, rife with metaphors and silliness to keep it light. However, this episode does include a part that can be interpreted as an afterlife, and it’s also possible to see this plot as a baby’s first look at evolution.

Currently, the episode is available on all platforms in the U.S. with only the derogatory term removed. If you haven’t seen it in a while, it’s a deeply moving six minutes worthy of a rewatch.

Bluey Season 3 — Censored Or Banned Episodes (So Far)

The release of this season has been split into several batches of episodes. At the time of publication, Australia is about to get the third part of the season, with no plans on when it will come to the United States.

Censored: “Exercise”

What was censored? The episode opens with Bandit looking unhappy about the results of weighing himself, grabbing his sides remorsefully. Chilli shows similar dissatisfaction when she does the same. Arguably one of the biggest chunks to be edited out of this show, “Exercise” turned into a huge divisive battle immediately with accusations of fat-shaming, and concerns centered around body dysmorphia in children and adults. Ultimately, the first minute of this episode was removed across all global distributors due to these concerns, instead starting in the backyard with Bandit beginning his workout routine and no discussion on the shape of his body. To be clear, this episode has not even aired yet in the US.

Censored: “Perfect”

Why was it censored? In one flashback, Bandit is playing “Boomerang” with Bluey while having a conversation with Fido. In the original version, the conversation seems to be about getting neutered, or in human terms having a vasectomy. When it arrived in the U.S., it was changed to be about having Bandit’s dog teeth removed.

Censored: “Born Yesterday”

Why was it censored? In a scene where Bingo and Bluey teach Bandit how to use a swing, the girls intentionally position him so it hits him in the crotch, causing him to cry out, “My groin!” That word is eliminated in the U.S. version.

Also in S3, the word “groin” is edited out of the U.S. version of “Chores” when Bandit complains about hurting his groin after attempting to do Bingo’s “Bee-yoop” silly walk.

Censored: “Mini Bluey”

Why was it censored? When Bingo proves to Bluey she’s annoying too, only in a different way, the younger sister tapes her nose back and puts fake teeth into her mouth. Bluey says she looks “crazy” in the Australian version. The word “crazy” does not appear in the U.S. version.

As opposed to an abrupt cut to hide something like Bandit’s groin hit in “Born Yesterday,” the cut is not noticeable at all and adds to the element of surprise once Bingo reveals herself.

Censored: “Driving”

Why was it censored? While having an imaginary drive with Bluey that starts to take a turn into madness, her stuffed cat Agatha threatens to pee on the curtains. In the censored version, Agatha instead tells them she’ll scratch their curtains.

Censored: “Faceytalk”

What was censored? When Muffin goes on a rampage and tries to escape from her dad while still on the call, she runs around the house, eventually smashing into the bathroom, which Trixie is using. In the original version, Trixie can be clearly seen on the toilet, forced to cover herself up. The American edit crops this out, instead keeps the shot tight on Muffin’s face so as not to reveal the scene behind her.

Update: As of the summer of 2023, “Faceytalk” has been restored to the original version, with Trixie easily seen seated in the bathroom.

Censored: “Puppets”

Why was it censored? Unicorse is using his best moves to get on Chilli’s good side in the worst way possible. While showing off his sweet moves, Chilli remarks about the chili sauce stain on his body. Australians heard Unicorse respond with, “Wanna’ lick?” The American version has altered this to “Want a bit?”

Censored: “The Decider”

Why was it censored? Twice in “The Decider,” the two families of sports fans tease each other by saying their team will “flog” the opponents. A term more commonly used with Australian sports fans than Americans, Disney+ viewers will instead hear “beat” due to the violent implications of what the other word means.

Briefly Banned: “Family Meeting”

Why was it banned? The obvious reason is the sheer volume of references to passing gas. There isn’t any real potty humor here, but the impetus of the episode is based around a silent but deadly affront to poor Bluey’s nose.

Censored: “Relax”

Why was it banned? In the opening moments of "Relax," Bandit calls the kids "Super Troopers" in the US edit. However, in the original Australian version, he refers to his girls as "Dingle Berries." What's so controversial about a nonsense word? Turns out the phrase has more than one meaning, and while many know it as a way to insult someone's intelligence, it stems from something more fecal. Apparently, when it comes to Disney Plus, bathroom humor and Bluey mix like cereal and windshield washer fluid, so those berries were better left where they belonged.

Where To Watch Banned Bluey Episodes

If you’re looking to find all the episodes closer to how they looked when they initially aired, the only way is to get the DVD of Season 1 and Season 2, which is region-specific to the United States. There are also other ways to find Bluey episodes, but even the hardiest of Pomeranians wouldn’t dare look in those dark corners of the web. Occasionally, the ban does lift on an episode, but so far, that’s only happened once or twice.

Non-banned Bluey episodes air on Disney+ in the United States.

Raising kids is a daily learning experience, but Chili and Bandit make it look so easy in Bluey. Sure, they have their tough times, like Bandit’s failed attempts at making a duck-shaped cake for Bingo’s birthday, or the Sticky Gecko incident with Chili (which she prefers we don’t talk about), but they overcome and make us want to excel at parenting as much as they seem to be. Much of that parenting and resolution comes from play — Bluey games that show good parenting and good fun can go hand in hand. Who knew animated anthropomorphic dogs would be our parenting inspiration, but here we are. But how do you play the games from Bluey in real life? What are the rules of the Bluey games?

We can’t all reach the same level of playtime excellence that Bluey’s Mom and Dad constantly achieve. But you can recreate wonderful games. We’ve rewatched every episode of the show with attention to the games, and then we tried them at home with our kids. Did they all work as perfectly as they did on screen? Not exactly. But in general, did we have a good time? Are Pomeranians a hardy breed? Exactly. Here’s a list of 19 specific Bluey games that come straight from the show into your living room — a guaranteed good time for the whole family.

19. Shadowlands

From Bluey Season 1, Episode 5, this game is best played in a wide-open field on a bright day with fluffy clouds looming in the sky. So, this one isn’t an everyday affair. Your kids hide under the shadows cast overhead, then run, jump, and scream into the next nearest shadow. Touching any part of the ground the sun hits means you’re out. It’s also a good way to stretch your budget on sunscreen.

Watch “Shadowlands,” on Disney+ here.

18. Taxi

This game comes from Season 1, Episode 25, “Taxi.” Destination unknown, as your living room becomes a taxi, and your kid — the driver. Set up some chairs and a makeshift dashboard, and into traffic, you go! Watch out for pedestrians, other drivers, or whatever other hazards will get in the way of making your arrival on time. There are plenty of variations you can do with this game, changing the vehicle from a cab to a plane, train, starship, sandworm, or whatever imaginary vessel you want.

Watch “Taxi,” Bluey Season 1, Episode 25 on Disney+ here.

17. Raiders

The game of “Raiders,” comes from Episode 16 in Season 1, which is called “Yoga Ball.” If you’ve got a Yoga ball in your home, you’re ready to play Raiders! The goal is to grab a lost treasure hidden behind obstacles you set up. Once they snatch it – you come after them and roll the ball down the hall to recreate that iconic movie scene. Really, though, if you’ve ever seen any Indiana Jones films, you can make up other gambits to chase your kids with. Even after the game ends, you can still teach them about monkey brains at dinner.

Watch Bluey Season 1, Episode 16, “Yoga Ball,” right here.

16. Grannies

I’d say who doesn’t love The Grannies on Bluey, but if your kids become half as exasperating as Janet and Rita, you will definitely have your hands full. This one comes from Bluey Season 1, Episode 28. The “rules” are simple: Your children dress up and act like octogenarians, turning mundane tasks into elderly-inspired chaos. If you’re daring, combine Grannies into any of the other games on this list, and watch the madness unfold.

Watch Bluey, Season 1, Episode 28, “Grannies,” right here.

15. Boomerang

This game comes from Bluey Season 3, Episode 14, which is called “Perfect.” It’s a solid diversion if you’re at a gathering with other adults, but your children still want to play. Gently lob your kid in another direction and let them spin and twirl to their heart’s content. Then, like the game’s namesake, they return back to you, ready to be thrown again. Minimum effort on your part, but maximum fun for the little ones since they’re really the ones in control of how wild the boomerang is!

Watch Bluey, Season 3, Episode 14, “Perfect,” right here.

14. Dance Mode

From Bluey Season 2, Episode 3, it’s all about “Dance Mode.” Did your kids know there’s a switch on your back? If they find and flip it, you turn into a dancing machine – no matter where you are! If you’re coy, you can convince your children they also have a button that turns on their best jitterbug. This game is not for those who embarrass easily, but if you’re ready to show your kids how committed you are to playtime, Dance Mode turns everywhere you go into a boogie-down good time.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 3, “Dance Mode,” right here.

13. Charades

We all might think we know the game of charades, but Bluey Season 2, Episode 5, “Charades,” takes it up a notch. This is the only game on the list that requires investing a bit more into your game, but it’s worth it. Use a pack of Charades cards that don’t require reading and have pictures on them, then act out the image until someone guesses it correctly. It’s a lot of fun seeing how children interpret the world around them, you’ll be surprised how enjoyable this game can be with little ones. Nana Heeler plays this with the kids, so this is a good way to get grandparents or older relatives involved in playtime that won’t involve sprinting around the house.

Watch Bluey, Season 2, Episode 5, “Charades,” right here.

12. Restaurant

From Bluey Season 2, Episode 14, “Fancy Restaurant,” we get a classic make-believe game with a new hilarious twist. Why go out for a dinner date with your significant other, when you can stay home and be served by your kids? They can be the maître d’, the waiter, the chef - or if they are feeling villainous, the lazy exterminator – and give you a night out you’ll never forget. I’d suggest setting some ground rules about what you’ll eat before you start playing. Otherwise, you’ll feel exactly like Bandit did at the end of that episode. Poor guy…

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 14, “Fancy Restaurant,” right here.

11. Bad Mood

From Bluey, Season 2, Episode 3, “Bad Mood,” is sort of what it sounds like. Intended as an exercise in emotional regulation, the concept of the game makes it exceptionally fun for any situation. Bandit plays this with Bingo when she’s in a bad mood, climbing onto his feet and controlling her limbs as they smash into things, much to Bingo’s excitement. Even without a bad mood, your kids will love piloting a parent mech. Viking hats sold separately.

Watch Bluey, Season 2, Episode 3, “Bad Mood,” right there.

10. Work

In Bluey Season 1, Episode 31, everyone gets down to business in “Work.” If you’re a remote worker, you already know the struggles of trying to stay afloat at the job while having kids scamper underfoot. The kids can interview you for a profession of their choice, and turn you into their employee to boss around. If you play your cards right, you might be able to distract them with the paperwork of their own to let you sneak in some actual work time. Try not to get fired - ideally from BOTH of your jobs!

Watch Bluey Season 1, Episode 31, “Work,” right here.

9. Backpackers

In Bluey Season 1, Episode 36, everyone gets the travel bug with “Backpackers.” But, the trick here is nobody is actually going anywhere! Save money on a vacation to hike around the Alps or the Appalachian Trail, and instead backpack through Europe in your own home. Your children call the shots here, as they create the exotic locations and give you commands about what to do and say while on your excursion. Remember – as much as you wish you were, you are not a cartoon dog. Unless you’ve been doing your deadlifts, don’t wear the kids on your back if you want to be able to bend over when you’re older. What they can do instead is fill an actual backpack with household objects you’ll use on your trip instead of the items you’d actually need. Who needs a passport when you can hand Customs a toilet brush instead?

Watch Bluey Season 1, Episode 36, “Backpackers,” right here.

8. Rug Island

This one comes from Bluey Season 2, Episode 10, “Rug Island.” Find the biggest rug or carpeted space in your home, drag some potted plants or couch cushions onto it, and transform your living room into a deserted island in the middle of the sea. Bluey and Bingo used felt markers to make all the objects in their little haven by the shore, but anything goes on the rug so take whatever you like and pretend it’s the essentials you need to survive. Imagination rules above all else, so immerse yourself in the mind of a child and drift away to simpler times when an island could just be a rug.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 10, “Rug Island,” right here.

7. Feather wand

This comes from Bluey Season 2, Episode 2, “Feather Wand.” When Bingo discovered a feather on the ground, she quickly realized it was a magic wand. Whenever she pointed it at something or someone, she exclaimed “Heavy!”, and made it weigh a ton! You haven’t lived until you’ve cleaned your teeth with a floor toothbrush. Much of the fun happens when the objects are disenchanted, and suddenly become their original weight as they abruptly fly at your face once the struggle is over.

A variation on this would be from the episode “Magic Asparagus”, where your child transforms you into different animals by zapping you with an enchanted vegetable. Bluey used asparagus, but a sturdy carrot or parsnip would do the trick, too. Nothing leafy, unless you like cleaning up sprigs of supernatural broccoli from your dining room floor.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 2, “Feather Wand,” right here. Also, watch Bluey Season 1, Episode 49, “Asparagus,” right here.

6. Torch Mouse

This game comes from Bluey Season 2, Episode 25, “Double Babysitter.” A brilliant game to wear out your young ones, this game works best at night time when it's darker. Your child is the cat, trying to catch the “mouse” AKA the beam from your flashlight or laser pointer. Bluey and Bingo were elated to play this with their babysitter, and it will quickly become a favorite with your little kittens, too.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 25, “Double Babysitter,” right here.

5. Pet Feet

Not every game on this list requires the parents to break a sweat. I’m throwing you a bone here. This one comes from Bluey Season 2, Episode 8, “Daddy Dropoff.” And, it’s a game you can easily play on your back in bed, while your kids have a romp with your frisky feet. Whatever is below your knees becomes the animal of your choosing, and your kids can play and take care of them. When you get tired of playing, just remind them of how stinky your feet are, and that should be enough to send them running.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 8, “Daddy Dropoff,” right here.

4. Favorite Thing

As the day comes to a close and you are all winding down, Favorite Thing is a fantastic way to interact with your kids at mealtime that doesn’t wind them back up. This comes from Bluey Season 2, Episode 7, “Favorite Thing.” The rules are simple: Everyone takes turns sharing what their favorite thing was that happened to them today, and you discuss it and turn their singular experience into a moment everyone enjoys. This a sneaky way to get your kids better at their conversational skills and having etiquette at the dining table, while also creating fun family memories that will last a long time after the plates are cleaned up.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 7, “Favorite Thing,” right here.

3. Story Time

This game comes from a classic Bluey episode: Season 1, Episode 8, “Fruit Bat.” It’s typical to read a book to your kids at bedtime to help them sleep, but it’s a bit unusual for you to fall asleep while reading their book. Try as you might, you just can’t stay awake, especially when you get to the exciting parts. Your kids can try to wake you up, but you’re having such a hard time keeping your eyes open! Whether you finish the book, or flop onto their pillow for a nap of your own, is up to you.

Watch Bluey, Season 1, Episode 8, “Fruit Bat,” right here.

2. Octopus

This comes from Bluey Season 2, Episode 46, “Octopus.” Chloe the Dalmation learned this game from Bluey, who explained Dad is the octopus behind their couch, and the two kids are fish trying to steal his treasure. The octopus tries to stop them with his tentacles, swinging them at the fish and trapping them in his suction cups. Simple enough, and easy to play.

The dilemma is, when Chloe brings the game back to her home to play with her dad, it isn’t the same experience. Every time one suggests something, the other felt like their ideas were being rejected. Instead of turning the other person down, they decide to say yes to everything and remake the game to fit the way they play.

The lesson Chloe and her dad learned is when it comes to games, there are no rules. Playtime with your kids is like improv comedy. It’s best when it’s “Yes, and –“because saying no grinds the scene to a halt. There are still boundaries that must be respected, but let your imagination go as far as they can reach to make playtime a truly enjoyable experience for everyone involved.

Watch Bluey Season 2, Episode 46, “Octopus,” right here.

1. Keepy Uppy

The game that started it all! From Bluey Season 1, Episode 3, this game is essential. Blow up a balloon, toss it to your tiny ones, and let the havoc begin. As long as the balloon never touches the ground or pops, the game continues! If it does land, throw it back in the air and start again.

Watch “Keepy Uppy,” on Disney+ here.

Bluey streams on Disney+.

Imagine if you could tell Bilbo Baggins to leave the ring behind for Gollum, have Leslie not swing on the rope to Terabithia on that rainy day, or remind Jonas to pack warmer clothes at the end of The Giver. Most fiction is concrete, with the authors dictating what happens next. But that changed when two writers figured out a way for the reader to control a character because the reader was that character. We’re talking about Choose Your Own Adventure, of course. The first published installment arrived in 1979, with The Cave of Time — though as we’ll see that wasn’t really the first book. For decades, Choose Your Own Adventure was an atypical experiment in literary determinism that resulted in one of the most-read book franchises ever created.

For a generation, these interactive novels transported readers through space and time to form their own stories, putting them in the cockpit of planes, the gi of a judo master, or even the fins of a shark. By the end of the 90s, CYOA closed the chapter on its story, but nearly twenty-five years later, the company is back in action. Here’s how it all began, ended, and began again.

Interactive books weren’t a completely new idea before Choose Your Own Adventure (CYOA), but its predecessors weren’t mainstream popular. There was a romance novel from the 1930s, where the reader decides which suitor the protagonist marries, with dozens of possible endings. Several high-concept stories arrived by the 50s and 60s, like Raymond Queneau’s surreal Story As You Like It or Robert Coover’s explicit and unsettling The Babysitter. Celebrated for their uniqueness, none of these caught on beyond their novelty and were purely adult fare. It wasn’t until a lawyer teamed up with a young writer to find a way to bring this idea to bookshelves across the country.

Edward Packard came from a family deep in the legal business, but practicing law was never something he truly cared about. While his passion was writing, Ed’s children's books were never picked up by publishers. His fate changed one evening in 1969 while making up a bedtime story for his two daughters about a character named Pete. Struck by writer's block, Packard couldn’t figure out how to progress the tale and asked his kids what should happen next. When both girls answered differently, he realized Pete was never the protagonist – it was his kids living those adventures firsthand in their imaginations. Immediately, Packard knew he was onto something.

Ray Montgomery had just started Vermont Crossroads Press in 1970, after cutting his teeth writing roleplaying scenarios for Clark Abt, a pioneer in educational games. The Yale and NYU grad had aspirations larger than his employer and ventured out to make a name for himself in publishing. When Packard walked into his office with a draft of Sugarcane Island in 1976, Montgomery saw great potential that perfectly aligned with his interests. “I Xeroxed 50 copies of Ed’s manuscript and took it to a reading teacher in Stowe,” Montgomery said in an interview from 1981. “His kids — third grade through junior high — couldn’t get enough of it.”

Sugarcane Island became the best-selling book of the upstart publisher, moving over five thousand copies, but they were still an unknown entity in a crowded landscape.

Choosing Their Own Adventures

It was this point where things started to get messy for Packard and Montgomery. Both writers saw a potential for larger success beyond the small Vermont publishing house, and the two pursued greener pastures, independent from each other's ventures. Packard published two CYOA-style books in 1978 under the Harper imprint, Lippincott. Meanwhile, Montgomery’s agent managed to obtain a six-book deal from Bantam in 1979, and the two writers came together to officially launch the CYOA experience as we know it today.

Similar to the origin story of Sugarcane Island, Packard turned to his kids for story ideas. His daughter, Andrea, told him about her summer escapade, spelunking, and her desire to wander solo to explore more. She imagined a tunnel that could transport her to another time or place, and her dad loved it! Andrea scribbled more notes and ultimately ideated the first published CYOA book, “The Cave of Time.”

While hiking through Snake Canyon, you come upon a cave you’ve never noticed before. You step inside and can potentially travel to medieval times, a prehistoric era, the Ming Dynasty, and other periods. Along the way, you can find your fortune through a foolish king, dine with cavemen, battle the Loch Ness Monster, try to escape the sinking Titanic, or any number of unpredictable possibilities. Some endings are bittersweet, others hopeful, and some are just plain grim.

A fortuitous mistake resulted in Bantam overprinting this inaugural entry, and the publisher remedied its overstock by donating 100,000 books to schools and libraries throughout America. This charitable act guaranteed their target audience would have no problem discovering the book, transforming CYOA into a household name practically overnight.

50 books later, readers returned to the cave for another adventure, making it one of the few retro CYOA titles to have a sequel. For her efforts, Andrea received a credit in the book and a percentage of royalties that still come to her mailbox decades later.

Final Destination

The opening page of every CYOA book warns readers they are responsible for their own fate. There’s no backtracking allowed (in theory), creating a flexible narrative where the outcome changes each time a page is turned. More often than not, the wrong turn leads to fatal consequences. But, really, who hasn’t flipped backward to reconsider a choice?

Few books offer the chance to be the master of a protagonist’s destiny, have wild adventures in a pocket-sized format, and combine those parts with the element of risk and uncertainty from a single decision. Some books have as many as 40 endings, and that finality could happen as early as the first ten pages. While most readers sought the happily ever after conclusion, others found pleasure in seeing how many ways they could fail in the grizzliest way possible.

“My philosophy was that it should be like life,” Packard once said, with the intent of including moral realism in the reader's experience. Smart choices were typically better than impulsive, haphazard decisions, but morally virtuous ones weren’t guaranteed to be the wisest, and you often paid for heroics with self-sacrifice. Cheating was discouraged, but technically, if you didn’t take your finger off the page, it wasn’t a final decision.

There was one time when being mischievous paid off, and that famous case was the twelfth book, Inside UFO 54-40. This is the only book in the series that explicitly rewards cheating. In order to find the secret alien planet, the reader must forego the typical CYOA patterns and stop playing along. Only by reading the book straight through would they stumble on a page unmarked by any choices to discover this paradise. “You did not make a choice, or follow any directions, but now, somehow, you are descending from space—approaching a great, glistening sphere.” The lesson was ambiguous, but a valuable one - sometimes, disobeying the rules is its own reward.

The End? Return to Page One

CYOA books dominated stores around the world during the ’80s and ’90s, with hundreds of millions of books sold in 38 languages. But as the new millennium approached, Montgomery and Packard found themselves at a crossroads with no page to turn.

Video games were taking over, as screen time replaced reading. Sales dwindled until the company flew the white flag in 1998, ending with book #184, Mayday, which Packard co-wrote with the person responsible for the very first title in the franchise, his daughter Andrea.

In 2003, Montgomery and his wife Shannon Gilligan (who met while working on an Atari game based on the CYOA books) bought the rights to the franchise and revived it through Chooseco. Montgomery passed away in 2014, writing Gus vs. the Robot King, but Gilligan has kept the brand thriving as CEO while bringing it to new places.

Today, CYOA sells an average of a million books annually, evolving to reach a more inclusive readership and touching on issues that affect modern society. Their bestseller remains a four-pack filled with Classics, but Chooseco transitioned into graphic novels like Eighth Grade Witch and offers longer CYOA books with titles like Time Travel Inn and Murder at the Old Willow Boarding School, which introduced their first nonbinary character. Readers ages 5 to 8 can dip their toes into the Dragonlark series, and even younger ones can start their adventure with the adorable board book The Abominable Snowman, with lethal endings absent from these kid-friendly editions. There are also board games, a math book, an upcoming Tarot card set, and a proposed book series for nostalgic adults with more mature themes — but nothing too explicit.

Packard wrote a trio of books in the CYOA style under the name U-Ventures in 2010 and continues to write fiction while maintaining his blog.

Montgomery always hoped the CYOA series would be a stealth reading program to excite kids into becoming voracious bookworms. Years later, his dream continues to be a reality and may soon rekindle that same love within adults who grew up on these books.

There are surprising plans beyond the traditional format that Gilligan couldn’t divulge in 2023, but even as technology evolves, nothing beats the experience of reading a physical book and not knowing what awaits the reader when they turn it over.

At Toy Fair 2023, Shannon Gilligan said: “Touching a page and moving it makes the brain think you’ve been somewhere on some super subtle level.” And even though she said Choose Your Own Adventure is at the “dawn of a relaunch,” the truth is, we’ve all been on this adventure for years.

It’s an undeniable fact that Beverly Cleary was a huge part of the way several generations of kids learned to read. She has been since Henry Huggins arrived in 1950, and remains a top pick for voracious young readers beyond her passing in 2021 at the age of 104. Library shelves forever enshrine her Ramona and The Mouse and The Motorcycle books, rightfully revered as timeless classics. Despite being generations apart from when they were first penned, children continue to connect with Cleary’s earnest style that never forgets to throw in some laughs. Among her dozens of books, there’s one underrated story that can be viewed as the most empathetic book the author ever wrote, covering a topic rarely tread upon in kids' literature written during that era.

First published four decades ago, in 1983, Dear Mr. Henshaw centers on a boy from California named Leigh Botts, who aims to be a writer when he grows up. Beginning in second grade, the youngster starts a correspondence with famous children’s book author Boyd Henshaw, which continues over several years. During this time, Leigh is coping with his parents' recent divorce, trying to make sense of the confusing emotions caused by this trauma.

Mr. Henshaw responds to Leigh’s sixth-grade assignment to write a letter to an author with his own set of ten questions. The aspiring author slowly and reluctantly answers probing inquiries like “Who are you?” or “What is your family like?” As time marches forward, Leigh discovers he enjoys writing to Mr. Henshaw, and the letters become a form of therapy, eventually transitioning into a personal diary addressed to “Pretend Mr. Henshaw.” Leigh finds comfort in this safe space, openly addressing his fears and concerns, like why his dad doesn’t say he misses him when they talk on the phone (if he remembers to call), and how Leigh doesn’t like being home alone after his mom leaves for work.

While Leigh responds to his correspondence, the readers of Dear Mr. Henshaw never see a single word from the adult author. The character is merely a guide to Leigh opening up, processing his feelings, and permitting himself to have this outlet. Between his time writing letters and the lessons from his teachers, Leigh’s abilities as a writer simultaneously mature while his emotional vocabulary grows. By the end, he’s able to face his negligent father, understand his mother’s pain, and realize the divorce wasn’t his fault, while also having his first taste of success as a published author. No matter how hard he wishes, Leigh’s world will never be the way it was, but like the butterflies he finds during his walks along the shore (similar to the real Monarch Butterfly Grove in Pismo Beach), Leigh grows into something new and different, comfortable with who he's become.

According to Beverly Cleary, Dear Mr. Henshaw is the most serious book she wrote during her lifetime. The story came about because two different boys wrote letters to her around the same time, asking why she hadn’t written about a boy whose parents were divorced. The spark was lit, and the book flowed from her head onto paper.

Cleary’s books were not typically as solitary as Dear Mr. Henshaw, and rarely delve into serious trauma. It’s an outlier with its somber tone and grounded situation, although Cleary’s signature humor from across her catalog of work is present. Leigh doesn’t live in a bustling cul-de-sac surrounded by kids, but rather isolated in “a really little house,” with his neighbors being a gas station and a thrift shop. He’s lethargic to find meaning in anything that goes on around him, trapped between unfamiliar spaces, physically and emotionally. After he adds writing to his routine, his sense of abandonment fades to allow personal growth that even adult readers can admire and aspire towards.

Dear Mr. Henshaw

Dear Mr. Henshaw is available from Amazon and most other retailers who carry books

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Dear Mr. Henshaw covers many of the anxieties children feel during a divorce. It’s not unusual for them to go through their own makeshift stages of grief, ranging from being mad and sad, denying the events are real while hoping everything will return to how things were before, and eventually accepting the new status quo. Kids can react to this outwardly through anger and tantrums, while other children will internalize it and never show what they’re truly feeling. Cleary reassures the reader that whatever they’re going through is nothing to feel ashamed about, and one can heal from the invisible wounds on their heart.

Divorce is rarely an easy transaction, no matter how old you are. Processing the good memories alongside the bad is a difficult experience, and often a source of confusion and frustration. Dear Mr. Henshaw encourages the reader not to be afraid to explore what hurts them because the only way to grow is to face it in a healthy and introspective way.

Despite earning a Newbery Medal when it was released, Dear Mr. Henshaw remains overshadowed by Cleary’s more popular and light-hearted stories. It received a sequel eight years later with Strider, centered on Leigh and his friend Barry sharing custody over a stray dog they discover on a beach. While it didn’t reach the level of notoriety its predecessor had, it’s a perfect follow-up for children continuing their own journeys through divorce.

Cleary’s books were predominantly a slice of idealized Americana, but the concept of change can be found in many of them. Dear Mr. Henshaw is a magnificent book as relevant today as it was 40 years ago, inspiring readers to look inward and answer the tough questions preventing them from finding clarity in their lives.

Parents often lament that kids don’t come with instruction manuals. This isn’t to say there’s a lack of guidance available for those wanting to refine their parenting skills. As far back as 1946, when American pediatrician Benjamin Spock’s The Common Sense Book of Baby and Child Care sold 500,000 copies in its first six months of publication, the parenting book industrial complex has been humming right along.

As the school year gets ready to kick off, many parents will be looking for a helpful read as they start a post-summer reset. With so many options to sort through, we’ve hand-picked nine essential parenting books that provide cutting-edge insights across an array of topics — without talking down to parents.

A Place to Belong: Celebrating Diversity and Kinship in the Home and Beyond by Amber O'Neal Johnston

At the beginning of A Place to Belong, Amber O’Neal Johnston challenges parents to embrace self-interrogation in the pursuit of inclusivity. She fully acknowledges the intentionality and hard work that are required to cultivate a truly inclusive home, but she also captures the real urgency of this particular moment in history, if we want to start undoing the toxic effects of divisiveness and injustice.

Johnston lays out a compelling blueprint in A Place to Belong for how to help kids grow in self-acceptance and radical inclusivity. She includes examining family culture, acknowledging the challenges and injustices other cultures face, and evaluating the literary and media lenses parents provide through which their kids then interpret the world around them. And she’s a passionate proponent for parents normalizing difficult conversations with their kids.

While it’s a message delivered with grace, Johnston’s call to inclusivity isn’t an easy task to adopt. But she’s tread the road with her family, and gives a clear-eyed view of how she came to the realization that accepting such an undertaking was preferable to accepting the alternative.

The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives by William Stixrud Ph.D., and Ned Johnson

There’s no shame in parents wanting what’s best for their kids. Where things tend to go off the rails is when parents take too intense of a hands-on approach to every aspect of their child’s lives, stunting their capacity for independence and problem-solving.

But parents who want to foster independent kids need to rely on more than their gut feelings to discern appropriate levels of parental support. Stixrud and Johnson offer insights from research to give parents evidence-based strategies for raising resilient kids who don’t fear failure and provide practical advice to help address the roots of childhood anxiety.

Parent Like It Matters: How to Raise Joyful, Change-Making Girls by Janice Johnson Dias, PhD

Real talk. Parenting can feel like such a high-stakes endeavor at times, and when it does it can absolutely suck the joy out of parents and kids alike. Sociologist Janice Johnson Dias, Ph.D., understands that reality and sets out in Parent Like It Matters to help parents cultivate joy in their daughters without lowering the expectation that they can create sustainable social change.

Dias bolsters autobiographical storytelling and insights from academic research with assignments at the end of each chapter that provide a roadmap for parents to better care for themselves, get to know their daughters more fully, and raise girls who are purposeful, courageous and joyful.

How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids: A Practical Guide to Becoming a Calmer, Happier Parent by Carla Naumburg, Ph.D.

Are you ever afraid of how judgy other parents would get if they knew how often you lost it with your kids — or how much energy you burn to keep yourself from losing it with your kids? Well, chances are, you’re not alone. Which doesn’t mean that parents shouldn’t strive to become more patient, but it does suggest we’d all be better off if we were honest about how hard it can be to keep our cool.

Naumberg gives voice to these struggles with an honest hilarity to help parents break the shame cycle of feeling like a failure whenever they can’t conjure the patience necessary to keep a compassionate poker face when their kids are driving them nuts. It’s a disarming — though also direct and to-the-point — approach that provides parents the space to identify their triggers and make a plan for avoiding and diffusing them.

The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.

When The Whole-Brain Child was released over a decade ago, it felt revolutionary in the way it explained the practical implications of neuroscience to parents. Their explanations about how the brain works and how parenting affects brian development were easy to digest, and it felt like parents were being given a cheat code to understand healthy ways to respond to normal kid behaviors that often seemed irrational.

Eleven years later, The Whole-Brain Child still holds up as one of the most helpful and practical parenting books available. And as eye-opening as it can be on first read through, it’s formatted in a way that is easy to flip through for a quick refresher when parents want to brush up on its content and strategies.

The Power of Showing Up: How Parental Presence Shapes Who Our Kids Become and How Their Brains Get Wired by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.

Tina Payne Bryson and Daniel Siegel have released dozens of helpful books, articles, and Ted Talks since the release of The Whole Brain Child, at their latest book is particularly relevant in that it explains how parents can be more present in an increasingly distracted world. It can sound like a daunting task, but The Power of Showing Up actually simplifies things for parents by giving them strategies on how to “show up” for their kids without overparenting.

As is common with books that Bryson and Siegel author together, The Power of Showing Up uses stories, scripts, simple strategies, and illustrations to present clear explanations of cutting-edge neuroscience as well as helpful evidence-based applications. It’s also strikingly reassuring in its emphasis that parenting mistakes and missteps are repairable and that it’s never too late to regain your child’s trust and help them develop emotional intelligence.

The Family Firm: A Data-Driven Guide to Better Decision Making in the Early School Years by Emily Oster

Most people don’t have “Ivy League Business Professor” on their bingo card of most helpful parenting experts, but Oster breaks the mold by providing some of the most data-rich writing available without making you want to sleep through class or skip the reading.

The Family Firm has been described as “a targeted mini-MBA program designed to help moms and dads establish best practices for day-to-day operations," which in some ways is an apt descriptor, though it makes the book sound significantly more stale than it actually is.

What helps The Family Firm feel fresh is that Oster understands the questions that parents find most confounding and shares the parenting missteps that have spurred her to dig into research in an attempt to

There is a special joy a parent gets when watching their child fall in love with a book, but whether you’re browsing your local library, walking through your favorite bookstore, or scrolling through a seemingly endless list of titles online, helping your child find the perfect read can be a daunting task.

But it’s an important one, especially when children are transitioning from picture books to chapter books. With most reaching at least a hundred pages, the right chapter book can not only entertain, but also build up a young reader’s reading endurance — and even their patience. Just as adults are drawn to watching “just one more episode” of their favorite binge-watchable television series, the right chapter book, especially ones with cliffhangers at the ends of chapters, can have your child begging to stay up late to read “just one more chapter.”

And wouldn’t it be great if that book were one that you and your child could enjoy reading together? Whether it’s a graphic novel, a light and silly read, a fantasy with larger-than-life characters and situations, or a story firmly grounded in reality, the right chapter book will have parents just as hooked as their children, creating the perfect bonding experience, especially as kids head back to school.

It may be tempting to suggest an “old reliable” book to your kid. After all, they’re reliable for a reason. But while there is a long list of children’s tales that are still beloved by many — from true classics like L. Frank Baum’s The Wonderful Wizard of Oz and Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland to comparatively newer titles, such as the works of Roald Dahl (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Matilda) and Louis Sacher’s Sideways Stories From Wayside School — new books are released each year that seem poised to become classics in their own right, captivating and sparking the imagination of today’s kids.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the quantity of books currently on the market, have no idea what kids are reading these days, or are just looking to introduce your child — and yourself — to something new, Fatherly has curated a list of 15 chapter books that were released within the last 10 years, broken down into different age ranges and across different genres, that will become treasured favorites once added to your child’s home library.

Lower Elementary Reads

Eerie Elementary: The School Is Alive! by Jack Chabert

Most kids have stepped foot in an elementary school, but how many have spent time in one constantly being threatened by ghosts? Hopefully not too many, but young readers will get a kick out of the Eerie Elementary series, where nearly everyone is in danger at school all the time, and it’s up to a small group of kids to save them through clever problem-solving. While The School Is Alive! is written in an age-appropriate way, it may be a little scary for kids who are prone to being fearful. You know your children best, but most early readers will enjoy having a few mild frights.

Yours Sincerely, Giraffe by Megumi Iwasa

This charming story of two unlikely pen pals, a giraffe and penguin, is a great way for children to learn that animals — or, even better yet, people — who look different and come from different parts of the world can still find a lot that they have in common. The narrative unfolds not only through narration and illustrations, but also the correspondence between the animals, making for a fun reading experience. At just over a hundred pages and fewer than 10 chapters, Yours Sincerely, Giraffe is an excellent book for elementary school-aged children and beginning readers looking to build their endurance. Also, don’t miss Megumi Iwasa’s follow-up, Dear Professor Whale, another story of two animals who develop a close long distance friendship.

Sofia Martinez: My Family Adventure by Jacqueline Jules

Jacqueline Jules’ expansive Sofia Martinez series offers excellent reads for all early elementary school-aged kids, but they will especially be embraced by those within the Latinx community. My Family Adventure, the first book in the lineup, centers on Sofia, a 7-year-old with two older sisters, who is eager to stand out and do things her way. Young children will enjoy reading about a character who is among the youngest in her family and who gets in all sorts of fun situations. Sofia’s immediate and extended family dynamics are quite beautiful to see play out, and the series also wonderfully includes common Spanish words and phrases into the narrative for authenticity, with a glossary provided to non-Spanish speakers.

Dog Man by Dav Pilkey

The creator of Captain Underpants returns with a graphic novel book series centered on Dog Man, who, as the name suggests, is part dog, part man, and all hero! He’s also the faithful companion of a not-too-bright police officer, whom Dog Man helps solve problems in creative ways. Like Dav Pilkey’s other works, readers can expect broad humor and story elements that will elicit genuine laughs from your children. This is a great story about loyalty, friendship, and the importance of outside-the-box thinking. While kids may be interested in skipping the author’s note, it’s worth taking a moment to read it with your child, as Pilkey explains how his early struggles with dyslexia ultimately led to his career as a writer. It’s an inspiring bit of personal history that should remind kids that challenges do not have to be permanent barriers to success.

The Invention of Hugo Cabret by Brian Selznick

It’s understandable why some kids may not enjoy reading period pieces, but it’s hard to imagine any child not being immediately gripped by author and illustrator Brian Selznick’s beautifully and creatively told story of Hugo Cabret, a young orphan in 1930s Paris who has inherited his family’s interest and skill in all things mechanical. Selznick’s superpower is moving the story forward and deepening our understanding of the characters through his illustrations. Sections of the book are told without words, just as portions of a motion picture might be played out without dialogue, making this an accessible book for readers for lower-level and/or younger readers, while still being a stylistically interesting read that will appeal to older kids and more seasoned readers as well.

Dragon Masters: Rise of the Earth Dragon by Tracey West

This fantasy-adventure story is perfect for kids with vivid imaginations who love fantasy and are often swept away by films like How to Train Your Dragon. While there are plenty of age-appropriate battle sequences, Rise of the Earth Dragon’s greatest strength lies in how the book subtly teaches kids about how to communicate effectively with others and draw on the strength of your friends. Tracey West’s Dragon Masters series is a great entry point for kids who are just starting to explore chapter books, as the vocabulary and storytelling won’t pose too much of a challenge for most early readers.

Upper Elementary/Lower Middle School Reads

The One and Only Ivan by Katherine Applegate

A gripping, first-person narrative told through the perspective of Ivan, a gorilla that has been held captive for 27 years. Ivan is blissfully unaware of his figurative shackles until he meets and befriends Ruby, a baby elephant recently taken from the wild who changes his world view. It’s easy for young readers to fall in love with the vivid, albeit contained, world that Ivan paints, and adults will enjoy the clear literary kinship between Applegate’s novel and classics like E.B. White’s Charlotte’s Web and Stuart Little. Kids who have trouble parting with the characters they love will enjoy learning that The One and Only Ivan is the first book in a series, and has been recently adapted into a film currently streaming on Disney Plus. This beautiful tale of friendship and possibilities is perfect for kids in upper elementary and early middle school grades.

The Last Last-Day-of-Summer by Lamar Giles

Summer reading can often feel like a chore, but Lamar Giles’s The Last Last-Day-of-Summer is just the book parents need to get their kids away from the screen and into a book. This quirky sci-fi adventure follows Otto and Sheed, two young Black male cousins, who are working to solve a mystery while traveling through time. The first in the Legendary Alston Boys series, this book’s exciting and funny time-bending narrative makes it the right read for kids — and parents — who enjoy Phineas and Ferb. Children without siblings, and/or kids who have strong bonds with their cousins, will also enjoy seeing Otto and Sheeds’ brotherly relationship unfold.

Space Taxi: Archie Takes Flight by Wendy Mass and Michael Brawer

Archie Morningstar is an 8-year-old boy with a talking cat who stays up past his bedtime to fight crime around the cosmos. We bet you’re intrigued, and your kids will be too! This debut in the Space Taxi series kicks off on “Take Your Kid to Work Day,” when our young hero learns that his dad drives aliens around in a taxi throughout outer space in the twilight hours. This fast paced sci-fi adventure story is filled with humor and, as you might expect from a story centered among the stars, a fair amount of educational information sprinkled throughout. This is a zippy and exciting read for second- through fourth-graders.

Dog Diaries: A Middle School Story by James Patterson

Readers who have enjoyed following the adventures of Rafe, the main character in James Patterson’s best-selling Middle School series, will get a real kick out of becoming better acquainted with Junior, Rafe’s faithful canine companion. This spinoff is told through Junior’s perspective, providing a new way to see a well-established literary world. Parents should be warned that there is some animal potty humor — after all, dogs will be dogs, and as all pet owners know, butt sniffs and peeing in the house comes with the territory — but this is a fun, and often silly, story of friendship and loyalty, proving that dog’s really are humans’ best friends.

My Pet Slime by Courtney Sheinmel

Representation matters in all forms, and My Pet Slime is a fun read for all kids in upper elementary grades — but especially for those who have allergies. The first book in Courtney Sheinmel’s series centers on Piper, a young girl who wishes she could have a pet. The problem, unfortunately, is that she’s allergic to just about everything. However, thanks to a little literary magic, she ends up becoming the owner of a pet out of slime that has come to life. With bright, colorful illustrations and a wonderful premise, My Pet Slime will resonate with your kids and even teach them a thing or two about caring for a pet in the process.

Hilo: The Boy Who Crashed to Earth by Judd Winick

This fast-paced and funny graphic adventure novel is a great fit for kids in upper elementary school grades. The Boy Who Crashed to Earth is the first in a series centering on Hilo, a seemingly normal kid who is anything but normal — and anything but what he seems to be. The vividly and boldly illustrated book captures larger-than-life moments, like Hilo, who heralds from outer space, battling large robots, with all the excitement they deserve. With a visual and narrative style that seems ready to adapt for an animated show on Nickelodeon, the stories of Hilo and his diverse and well-rounded group of friends will capture the attention of even the most reluctant of readers.

Middle School Reads

The School for Good and Evil by Soman Chainani

Even though your middle schoolers might feel too old for fairy tales, they will love The School for Good and Evil, Soman Chainini’s fresh take on the stories your children grew up loving. Like most fantasy stories, and most fairy tales, there is quite a bit of peril, violence, and some mild romance. It’s always fun when readers think they can predict what is going to happen next in a story, only to find out that their expectations have been used against them, and The School for Good and Evil delivers on that front in spades.

Blended by Sharon M. Draper

Some parents may find it difficult to discuss race with their children, but Sharon M. Draper’s Blended does an excellent job of introducing what could be challenging topics in a compelling narrative. The story centers on Isabella, an 11-year-old biracial girl who feels caught between her divorcing parents. Throughout Blended, Isabella encounters several microaggressions — intentional and/or unintentional insults about her race and gender — that end up having an impact on her self-esteem and shifting the way she sees the world. As it’s common for children in upper elementary and middle school grades to feel out of place, Blended provides a mirror for some kids to see themselves in an ultimately uplifting piece of realistic fiction. Parents should be advised that there are some mature themes, like a shooting and police brutality, but everything is presented in an age-appropriate way that will keep your kids glued to the book to find out what happens next.

Ghost by Jason Reynolds

If your middle schooler has fallen out of love with reading, or is itching for books that feel less kiddie books, then Ghost, the first in Jason Reynolds’ four-part Track series may be perfect for them. It’s a gripping coming-of-age story of Castle Cranshaw, nicknamed “Ghost,” who seems destined to be the star of his middle school track team, if only he could outrun his trauma brought about by a toxic and abusive parent first. While Ghost is somewhat mature in its themes, and — mild spoiler alert! — its unresolved ending will frustrate some, it’s a page-turning story of friendship and overcoming, or perhaps, outrunning, one’s obstacles.

Today, parents probably spend more time not watching kids TV shows than actually sitting down and watching them. Unlike family movie night, children’s television serves one undeniable purpose in the life of a busy family: a virtual babysitter. And, unlike 30 years ago, thanks to streaming, children now can binge-watch, just like their parents, requesting “one more episode” sometimes sweetly, sometimes because they’re hooked.

This isn’t to say children today watch too much TV, or that they watch more than we all did back in the ‘70, ‘80s, and ‘90s. And, in all the ways that count, what makes a good kids TV show is the same as it was back in the day: It’s a show that parents can walk away from, and, upon returning, won’t drive us too nuts. The greatest kids TV shows of all time are those that enrich our children’s lives in ways that we can enjoy, too.

Here at Fatherly, figuring out which kids TV shows are actually the greatest of all time means embracing several of these paradoxes. The writers and editors of this list — all TV critics who happen to be dads — didn’t decide that all of these shows were the most educational, most popular, or most politically progressive for the moment we live in. Many of the shows on the list tick those boxes too, sure. But like film, TV is an art form that informs as much as it entertains.

These shows are undeniably good — well-directed, acted, and produced — but they’re also, important. Great kids TV shows don’t just entertain our children. They inform them, subtly, or sometimes, hit them over the head with a message. They stick in the imagination of children, but not in an obnoxious way that is frustrating. Yes, many children’s shows are products, but the best ones don’t feel like pure consumption. There should always be something a little bit healthy in a great kids show, even if it’s just the fact that the show is extremely unique. Redeeming social value is good. Some educational value is great. But these things alone aren’t why adults watch TV, and this is also true of kids. So, we tried to think of not just great kids shows that are good for kids, but also great to watch. Some shows here are for very small kids. Some shows are for tweens. All of them are what we think are good shows first, and good kids shows, second.

With all of those criteria in mind, we also aimed to have fun with this list. It’s not remotely objective, nor is it biased. Fatherly’s 100 Best Kids TV Shows Of All Time, we hope, reflect the sensibilities of parents everywhere — it’s a little bit of this, a little bit of that, and a few big surprises along the way.

100. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

You may have heard that in the 2010s, My Little Pony rebooted and gained a following of a bunch of adult men who call them selves “Bronies.” While this phenomenon is notable, it does oddly overshadow the sheer brilliance, nuance and perfection that is My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Imagine a show where the comedy is so good, you’re actually looking forward to watching episodes with your little one. Now imagine that that same show has deep fantasy lore and interconnected canon that rewards you after you really get into it. That’s what Friendship is Magic is; it’s like Lord of the Rings meets Cheers, but for 7 year-olds. Some of the seasons beyond Season 6 start to push it a bit in terms of new ideas, but Seasons 1-5 are pure magic. For some Gen-Z kids out there, this show is already retro. But for your young ponies at home, it will feel brand new. — Ryan Britt

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic streams on Netflix and Tubi.

99. Salute Your Shorts

From its opening theme song, complete with the word “fart” in the lyrics, Salute Your Shorts proudly declares itself as a show that is a bit sweet, a bit rude, and incredibly funny. Set at a fictional sleepaway camp, the show followed a group of a half-dozen or so campers (most with instantly-memorable names like Donkey Lips, Sponge, and Z.Z. Ziff) who were often at odds with the head counselor, Kevin “Ug” Lee. Despite only running 24 episodes, the show still maintains a strong cult following. — Caseen Gaines

Salute Your Shorts streams on Paramount+.

98. Teen Titans Go!

Teen Titans Go! is a comedy triumph, one that weaponizes any knowledge the viewer might have of DC comics canon against them and ultimately has them in stitches. In an era where meta-awareness is increasingly a requirement for robust franchises, Teen Titans Go! knows how to have fun with comic book lore rather than be bogged down by it. It’s both a perfect entry point to the DC Universe for new viewers just looking for a fun time and the ultimate endpoint. — James Grebey

Teen Titans Go! streams on HBO Max.

97. Lizzie McGuire

Hilary Duff’s Disney Channel sitcom still appeals to countless teen girls as much as it did in 2001 as it does in 2023. Like Lizzie, Duff plays a typical teen trying to make her way through junior high school and life, which means contending with parents and siblings, mean girls, crushes, puberty, and homework.

What sets Lizzie McGuire apart is its effervescent star, Duff, a terrific supporting cast (Lalaine and Adam Lamberg as Lizzie’s best friends and Hallie Todd and Robert Carradine as her parents), and the animated Lizzie who expressed the character’s relatable, often panicked, feelings, fears, and aspirations. — Ian Spelling

Lizzie McGuire streams on Disney+.

96. The Magic Garden

Airing on New York’s WPIX for 12 seasons — from 1972 to 1984 — The Magic Garden lives up to its name, a show about people sitting in a magic garden playing music. Hosts Carole Demas and Paula Janis interact with the Chuckle Patch (giggling flowers), a Magic Tree, and a playful, peanut-loving squirrel named Sherlock (puppeteered and voiced by Cary Antebi). They also put on little shows, sparked by what they’d find when they opened the Story Box. Demas, Janis, and Antebi recently reunited for a few live 50th-anniversary performances and they’ve still got it. It’s one of the most unique kid’s shows of all time, and it very much holds up.

Demas and Janis are planning to produce an animated prequel focusing on young Carol and Paula becoming friends and discovering the wonders of the Magic Garden. — IS

You can watch huge chunks of The Magic Garden on YouTube.

95. The Flintstones

Airing from 1960 to 1966, The Flintstones is basically a cartoon version of The Honeymooners, for better or for worse. Fred harrumphs and embarks on doomed schemes with his pal Barney, while Wilma and Betty look on incredulously. Add in loads of visual jokes and punny names — Ann Margrock, Stony Curtis, Mr. Slate, brontosaurus burgers — as well as Dino, the Flintstones’ pet pink dinosaur, who loves to lick Fred, and you’ve got a stone-cold classic. Late additions Pebbles, Bamm-Bamm, and the Great Gazoo actually improved the show. Does it make any sense? Nope! But the enduring brilliance of great kids shows is that they’re sometimes not required to make any sense or be anything but entertaining. — IS

The Flinstones streams on HBO Max.

94. Land of the Lost

Ambitious way beyond its means, Sid & Marty Kroft’s Land of the Lost (1974-1976) sends the Marshall family — dad Rick, daughter Holly, and son Will — deep into the past (or something like it). There, the Marshalls encounter dinosaurs, and assorted creatures friendly (Cha-ka, a Pekuni) and dangerous (the hiss-worthy Sleestaks), as they struggle to survive and find a way home. Bona fide sci-fi talent — including huge writers like David Gerrold, Margaret Armen, Norman Spinrad, and Larry Niven — helped spin the show’s stories, particularly in its first — and best by far — season.

This is one of those classic old family shows that is way better and way more sophisticated than some might remember, and ripe for revisiting. — IS

Land of the Lost is streaming on Peacock.

93. Captain Kangaroo

CBS ran Captain Kangaroo for 29 seasons, from 1955 to 1984, a remarkable, legendary run. Countless millions of kids — and then their kids — grew up with the titular Captain, played by the wonderful and grandfatherly Bob Keeshan, who also created the show. Episodes — many of which kicked off with a major celebrity greeting Keeshan with “Good morning, Captain!” — featured sweet stories, visits from friends, entertaining puppets, animated shorts, knock-knock jokes (followed by a cascade of falling ping pong balls), songs, birthday greetings, and more. Favorite characters included Mr. Green Jeans (Hugh Brannum), Grandfather Clock, Mr. Moose, and Dancing Bear; the latter three roles were all performed or voiced by Cosmo Allegretti. — IS

Captain Kangaroo is streaming on the “Beta Max Channel” on Roku.

92. Clifford the Big Red Dog

Norman Bridwell’s beloved children’s books came to life from 2000 to 2003 as an adorable animated series (encompassing 66 episodes over two seasons) featuring John Ritter as the voice of Clifford, a massive 25-foot Labrador retriever. His owner, 8-year-old Emily Elizabeth, loves Clifford so, so, so, so much as a puppy that his size represents her love for him. And off on adventures they go, with Clifford’s size and puppy energy wreaking good-natured havoc.

Of all the Clifford adaptations, this series captures the heart of the books. It’s not so much about the problems Clifford creates. It’s all about Emily Elizabeth showing children what unconditional love looks like. — IS

Clifford the Big Red Dog streams on PBS Kids.

91. Thundarr the Barbarian

Imagine a post-apocalyptic show, in the vein of Planet of the Apes, with a character who behaves like Arnold Schwarzenegger in the Conan movies. What you would have is the 1981 series Thundarr the Barbarian, which is shockingly good.

Some ‘80s and ‘90s kids like to say Thundercats was better. But the truth is, Thundarr is the true winner here, mostly because Hanna Barbera had the inspired gall to give Thundarr a knock-off lightsaber. – RB

You can buy episodes of Thundarr on Amazon.

90. The Jetsons

Admit it: you saw the words The Jetsons and immediately started singing the show’s earworm of a theme song. Many people don’t realize that this Hanna-Barbera series ran for just one 24-episode season (1962-1963); another 51 episodes were produced between 1985 and 1987.

The original two dozen episodes tell the story of George Jetson and his family (wife Jane, daughter Judy, son Elroy, and dog Astro). The stories range from weird to weirder, but the imagery is what works here: brightly lit and straight out of the imaginings of the World’s Fair: flying cars, apartment complexes above the clouds, a robot maid (Rosey!), and an outdoor treadmill for Astro. Is it all in outer space? Or just very high in the sky? These are the questions children should be asking. — IS

The Jetsons are streaming on HBO.

89. Dragon Tales

The idea of escaping the mundanity of the real world and traveling to a fantastical world full of adventures is popular for a reason. (See: the plots of many sci-fi movies and shows, several video games, and the entire Isekai anime genre.) The PBS series Dragon Tales remains a wonderfully age-appropriate version of this fantasy. Dragon Land, where Max and Emmy travel to hang out with their dragon friends, is exciting without ever feeling dangerous. Dragon Tales doesn’t condescend or make its fantasy boring — a much more magical accomplishment than you might think. — JG

Dragon Tales is streaming on Prime.

88. The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles

In 1992, when George Lucas decided to put his wise-cracking, whip-cracking anti-hero on the TV screen, he also did something brilliant: He turned the entire story of Indiana Jones into a history lesson for children.

Throughout all the episodes of Young Indy, the titular adventurer finds himself connected to various historical events from the early 1900s through the 1920s. One of the most excellent episodes finds Indy present during the Treaty of Versailles. At least one Fatherly editor remembers his history teacher showing this episode in class in the year 2000. That’s right, history teachers were using episodes of Young Indy! If you’ve forgotten how great and educational this series is, it's time to catch up with the Joneses. —RB

The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles is available for rent on Apple TV+.

87. Vampirina

Based on the picture book series by Anne Marie Pace, Vampirina tells the story of a young family of monsters who move from Transylvania to Pennsylvania. As the theme song tells us, they get a case of “human race cultural shock,” right away. The fish-out-of-water theme pervades the entire series, making the titular character one of the most relatable vampires in all of fiction.

The show smartly never really gets into what kind of vampire “Vee” might actually be, and there’s never a mention of anybody drinking blood. But, the series does push it as far as a contemporary Disney series would allow. For kids who are having a hard time feeling seen at school, or for anyone feeling left out, Vampirina is both sweet and smarter than its saccharine appearance. — RB

Vampirina streams on Disney+.

86. Waffles + Mochi

Why are most kids cooking shows thinly-veiled celebrations of child labor and privilege? Kids should be taught that, in the words of Ratatouille, “everyone can cook,” not that cooking is a contest in which only those with special gifts can come out on top (and likely driven parents who are trying to make a child star out of a kid who likes to bake cakes). Instead, they should take a page from the brilliantly produced and downright inspiring cooking show Waffles + Mochi.

The formula is unbeatable: Two muppets representing the titular foods drive the plot (with a kid-life curiosity about food), Michelle Obama plays the role of mom working together to answer the kids' questions (and, yes, offer a moral or two along the way), and some of the world’s most influential chefs come in to inspire, breaking down the origins, uses, and meaning behind some of the most basic ingredients. Each episode brilliantly revolves around a single ingredient, a move reminiscent of Samin Nosrat’s Salt Fat Acid Heat (Nosrat is in fact one of the very best guests on the show). The show will drive you to the kitchen to, yes, make delicious recipes (the excellent Waffles + Mochi Get Cooking! cookbook helps) but more importantly to experiment, something even many adults are shy to do with food. Waffles & Mochi isn’t just a good kids cooking show — it’s one of the best cooking shows ever made, for kids, parents, and anyone truly curious about the food we eat. Bon appetit. — Tyghe Trimble

Waffles + Mochi streams on Netflix.

85. Izzy’s Koala World

The premise of Izzy’s Koala World is simple: This is a reality TV show about a girl who takes care of koalas in Australia. Izzy is real. Her mother, who is a veterinarian, is real. The koalas are real. The show never shies away from the real danger the koalas might be in, but it’s also a gentle show that knows the audience is very young children. These adorable, real koalas may get separated from their families, but there are no real scares (and no death scenes) in Izzy’s Koala World.

A brilliantly thoughtful and sweet show, Izzy’s Koala World reminds kids that the real world is just as exciting and full of love as the world of fantasy. — RB

Izzy’s Koala World streams on Netflix.

84. Smurfs

Where would we be without the Smurfs? To leave this show off a list of the best kids shows of all time would be bizarre. This isn’t to say that the classic Smurfs aren’t a tad bit problematic.

But, the energy, family vibe, and overall goofiness have earned these blue creatures a place in our hearts for one very good reason — we all still relate to the various Smurfs, and in looking for who we relate to in any given moment, parents and children can find themselves. — Harlan Sharpe

Smurfs is streaming now on Tubi.

83. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

In the ‘90s, just the title of this show seemed like it was trying to do too much. But today, everything about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TMNT) seems quaint, in a good way. Every iteration of the series, more or less, is about family. And, the parenting lessons we can all get from Splinter are still valuable.

TMNT may not teach kids much about actual martial arts, other than the fact that fighting is not actually the point. The titular teenagers here act like teens, so impatient kids can feel like their heroes are just like them. — RB

The 1987 version of TMNT is available for rent on Apple TV+.

82. Ada Twist

Based on the wonderful Questioneers book series, the Netflix show Ada Twist treats the scientific method like the ABCs. This empowering kids show has one stated goal: to demystify science for kids, by removing any pretension from discussions around fact-based subjects.

The result? Ada Twist and her friends don’t treat science as a superpower. They treat it as a normal, everyday part of life. As it should be. — RB

Ada Twist streams on Netflix.

81. Larva

Like Ren & Stimpy and roughly 25% of Spongebob, Larva is inappropriate. There’s no real way around that label given its obsession with bodily functions and cartoon violence that sometimes leads to actual death. But there’s a very big difference in the inappropriateness of this show compared to so many others — it’s 100% meant for the kids.

While Ren & Stimpy’s every revealed butt cheek and Spongebob’s quietly over-the-head penis jokes are given with a wink at the adults watching, Larva has an excess of toilet humor not to be subversive, but because kids like toilet humor. The two main characters, one red and one yellow caterpillar, often lean into pratfalls and gross jokes because, like kids, the world is large and scary and when they’re together roughhousing, farting, and being weird, they’re laughing. What better way to make their world a bit smaller, and more manageable? Profound? Not exactly. Socially redeeming? Not really. Sometimes we all could use a good chuckle. For kids, Larva is a laugh riot. — TT

Larva is streaming for free on Tubi.

80. The Facts of Life

Although the series got off to an unwieldy and unfocused start, once The Facts of Life honed in on Blair, Tootie, Natalie, and Jo — and, of course, their headmistress Mrs. Garrett — the show was off to the races. The series was bold, not only for focusing on four adolescent girls, but also for the array of subjects that were covered in each episode. As the title suggests, the comedy really was on a mission to teach its characters and viewers that sometimes in life you have to take the good and take the bad. That’s just a fact. — Caseen Gaines

The Facts of Life is streaming on Tubi.

79. You Can't Do That on Television

You Can’t Do That on Television holds the distinction of being the birthplace of Nickelodeon’s iconic green slime. But it was so much more than that. Launched in Canada in 1979, You Can’t Do That on Television served up variety show-style sketches for children, drenching countless kids and a few adults too in water and slime, and slamming endless locker doors. An ever-evolving cast starred in the show, which ran from 1979 to 1990 and gave us 144 episodes across its 10 seasons. Fun facts: A pre-teen Alanis Morissette appeared five times and the late, great Les Lye turns up in every episode (the only adult to do so), essaying multiple roles, including the show’s stage manager, a corrupt politician, and an inept firing squad commander. Slime is in. Incompetent adults are out. — IS

You Can’t Do That On Television streams on Paramount+.

78. Kim Possible

A kind of early-aughts brand of girl power takes center stage in the fun and fast-paced Kim Possible, as the title character (Christy Carlson Romano) juggles high school, friends, family, and cheerleading with the responsibilities of saving the world on a regular basis. Ron Stoppable (Will Friedle) serves as her sidekick along with his pet Rufus (Nancy Cartwright), who happens to be a naked mole rat (and generates lots of laughs). In the best possible way, Kim Possible — which dropped 87 episodes over four seasons from 2002 to 2007 — at times feels like a fully animated Lizzie Maguire. In a world where girls are still searching for great action heroes, the classic feminism of Kim Possible still works wonders. — IS

Kim Possible is streaming on Disney+.

77. Inspector Gadget

Imagine, if you will, a combination of The Pink Panther’s Inspector Clouseau and Get Smart’s Maxwell Smart as an equally daft and inept — and bionic — police inspector who fights crime across the globe. Now add a brilliant and savvy young niece (Penny) and a brainy dog (named Brain, natch), as well as a KAOS-like big bad called M.A.D. (Mean and Dirty), and you’ve got Inspector Gadget. Over the course of two extended seasons (from 1982 to 1986), fans enjoyed 88 episodes of pure silliness made even more entertaining thanks to the on-the-nose (but still awesome) casting of Don Adams, Maxwell Smart/Secret Agent 86 himself, as the voice of Inspector Gadget. — IS

Inspector Gadget streams on PlutoTV.

76. Captain Planet

Why can’t Captain Planet appear unless he’s summoned? Does he not exist without the belief that he exists? What do the magic rings do? Do they actually need the rings, or could they just call Captain Planet?

Hopefully, if you have a cool kid, they will ask all of these exact same questions while watching Captain Planet. The absurdity of the show is still great for kids today, and perhaps even more so than it was in the ‘90s. If you ever scoffed at the idea of an ecological superhero back then, you’re certainly not laughing now. The utter lack of cynicism is what makes this show immortal. Too bad Captain Planet doesn’t exist in real life. — RB

Captain Planet streams on YouTube.

75. Looney Tunes

No childhood would be complete without exploding sticks of dynamite. Yes, various aspects of Looney Tunes are bizarre, violent, and straight-up disturbing, but in that way Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, and all the rest reflect the real world. Life is looney, and at the very least, we should have a sense of humor about it.

The enduring impact of Looney Tunes is almost impossible to measure. Some purists would rank this show much higher on a list like this. We think it’s important that it’s here, but the truth is a discussion of Looney Tunes is much bigger than this list. Hot tip: Buy the DVDs. Getting all the good stuff online is going to be tricky for a while. — RB

Here’s Fatherly’s guide to streaming Looney Tunes.

74. Care Bears

OK, Care Bears is not cool. But consider, for a moment, the existence of “Grumpy Bear.” In all versions of the Care Bears, in which some concepts have been retired, and new bears and cousins created, “Grumpy Bear” abides. The idea that all the Care Bears represent the different feelings of children and that the show does not shame the concept of an ever-present grumpiness is not only brilliant, but it’s also very kind. Children need as much love as the world can give. But, they also need to know it’s OK to be grumpy AF sometimes. — RB

Classic Care Bears streams on YouTube.

73. X-Men

Other than Batman: The Animated Series, no comic book TV adaptation ever went as hard as X-Men. This show didn’t try to water down the complex comic book storylines; it embraced all of that. From time travel paradoxes to people losing their powers, to figuring out how to fit in with a society that hates mutants, the X-Men had it all.

Today, various films have given kids and families different versions of these Marvel comic book favorites. But, in a sense, the best version of the X-Men was right here. And it’s never been topped. — RB

X-Men is streaming on Disney+. But, here’s the Fatherly guide to watching the episodes in the correct order.

72. Phineas and Ferb

Pre-teen stepbrothers Phineas and Ferb take advantage of their long summer vacation to build crazy contraptions and embark on wacky sci-fi-ish adventures, while their bratty older sister Candace plots to rat them out to Mom. And we haven’t even mentioned the boys’ pet platypus, Perry, who’s actually a spy. It’s all whiz-bang silliness, with lots of action and some catchy original songs. Fun fact: Thomas Brodie-Sangster, who wowed in The Queen’s Gambit and won audiences’ hearts as the little boy in Love Actually, voiced Ferb, while Ashley Tisdale (The Suite Life of Zack & Cody, High School Musical) voiced Candace. What does this prove? The talent of Phineas and Ferb is immense. It’s good because great people are in it. — IS

Phineas and Ferb stream on Disney+.

71. Doug

Of the original Nicktoons, Doug was the most grounded — and the one with the most heart. It was easy to fall in love with Doug Funnie, who wrote in his journal every day, oftentimes about his adventures with his friend Skeeter (honk, honk!) and his feelings for Patti Mayonnaise. Doug both dared to be weird (who can forget the rock band The Beets and their hit single “Killer Tofu”?) while also relishing in the mundane aspects of adolescence: schoolwork, bullies, best friends, and unrequited crushes. With a literally colorful cast of characters, including Doug’s plucky pup Porkchop and artsy sister Judy, the show immediately left a lasting impression on everyone who came of age alongside Doug and the other residents of Bluffington. — CG

Doug is streaming on Paramont+.

70. The Brady Bunch

Try looking at a three-by-three grid of blue squares without envisioning Carol, Mike, Marcia (Marcia, Marcia!), Greg, Jan, Peter, Cindy, Bobby — and don’t forget Alice — awkwardly tilting their heads to smile at each other. The Brady Bunch often wore its cheesiness on its sleeve, starting with the conveniently gendered conceit of a man with three sons marrying a woman with three daughters, but even the most cynical viewer could find something entertaining about the simplistic problems the Bradys found themselves into, complete with a heavy-handed lesson from the family patriarch.

With their dated fashion and a few truly groovy songs as part of their repertoire (while “Sunshine Day” might be their most notable hit, your kids will ask you to play “Keep On” over and over again), it’s no surprise that the Bradys found themselves the subject of two excellent tribute-parody films in the 1990s, and a not-so-excellent one in 2002. But even without those films, their variety of specials, animated series, and other offshoots, the original show still stands on its own two feet. — CG

You can stream the classic Brady Bunch on Paramount+.

69. Ghostwriter

For a show designed to strengthen the reading and writing skills of children, Ghostwriter was more captivating than it had any right to be. Maybe it was the backdrop of a largely-romanticized version of New York City in the mid-’90s, or the well-developed and authentically diverse characters that included Black, Latinx, Asian, and white kids solving mysteries together. It may have been the character of Ghostwriter himself, a disembodied spirit who could make words appear on computer screens and across the sky, but in a way that was only visible to the chosen kids who could see him and summon him with their special pens. The show was educational, but beyond reading and writing, Ghostwriter taught kids how to think critically by encouraging the viewing audience to keep track of clues, either in their head or a physical notebook, over two-hour-long story arcs. — CG

New and old Ghostwriter streams on Apple TV+.

68. DuckTales

Both the classic version of DuckTales from 1987 and the more recent reboot have their charms. But, overall what this show has going for it in all incarnations is the way it perfectly pairs absurd premises with utter conviction.

Uncle Scrooge is pretty well redeemed by this series, though we’re still not sure how a duck can comfortably swim through giant pools of gold coins like that. Did we mention there’s a pilot duck character named “Launchpad” and we all just accepted that? Brilliant. — RB

DuckTales streams on Disney+.

67. Lily's Driftwood Bay

With a unique and utterly beautiful animation style, the stories of Lily’s Driftwood Bay encourage imaginative play through found objects. This isn’t the most gripping show of all time, but it is one that feels like taking a deep breath. For kids who need to unwind, as much as they need to be stimulated, this hidden gem is much more profound than it might seem, at first. But, like the treasures that Lily finds, the effect is cumulative. — HS

Lily's Driftwood Bay streams on Apple TV+.

66. Winnie the Pooh

No children’s library would be complete without the brilliant works of A.A. Milne, and the same is true when it comes to great kids TV. The 1977 Pooh shorts, created by Disney, in many ways, have supplanted the conception of the character in everyone’s mind. But, this isn’t an accident. First voiced by longtime Disney voiceover actor Sterling Holloway, the infectious nature of that Pooh-bear sound is universal.

Some great kids entertainment can be described and understood. Other times, it’s pure alchemy. All TV versions of Pooh come from the shorts that make up “The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh,” and most retain the heart and wit of the original.

Various Winnie-the-Poohs are streaming on Disney+ here.

65. Jonny Quest

All versions of Jonny Quest deserve a place in the history of great children’s TV for one reason: The characters transform archetypes like James Bond or Indiana Jones, and turn those adventures into believable children. Not everything about the classic ‘60s Jonny Quest will scan as progressive or 100% politically correct today. But, this show’s heart was in the right place. Like reading an old Hardy Boys or Nancy Drew novel to your kid, Jonny Quest comes with a warning label. But, it’s still great fun, and there’s nothing quite like that theme song! — RB

Jonny Quest streams on Amazon Prime.

64. The Backyardigans

One of the greatest musical shows ever to hit Nickelodeon, The Backyardigans represents a very specific moment in the early aughts. In some ways, this show was the anti-Teletubbies, mostly because it just contains so much wit, charm, and heart. Shows that encourage sing-alongs can get tricky, fast. Luckily, The Backyardigans holds up. The songs are so good, in fact, TikTok has created a whole Backyardigan renaissance. — HS

The Backyardigans streams on Paramount+.

63. The Adventures of Puss In Boots

What is it about Puss In Boots that keeps us all wanting more? The brash, fearless, and reckless cat with a sword is not a character who grows or reveals his complexities over time. He remains brash, fearless, and reckless in the face of his enemy-filled world. And yet, he’s not a two-dimensional character that can’t carry a movie (two, to be exact, plus scene-stealing cameos in the Shrek movies, and, why we’re here, three solid seasons of streaming television).

After all, his determination and defiance are charming and relatable — especially to the braggadocious 5-, 6-, or 7-year-olds who make up the ideal audience for Puss. While the Puss In Boots movies are masterful Quixotian cartoon adventures, the Puss In Boots television series (on Netflix, from 2015-2018) is more focused on the joy of the characters, bringing the adventure home to the cat and his pals. The show isn’t one that’s really for binging as the plots are a bit predictable, the villains mostly forgettable, and the lessons a bit thin. But Puss is undeterred, wearing his confidence like a badge and by the end of each episode, owning up to his mistakes — until the next episode, with swords drawn, ready to fight. — TT

The Adventures of Puss In Boots streams on Netflix.

62. Shaun The Sheep

Nick Park spun off this very British stop-motion animated children’s show from his super-popular Wallace & Gromit universe. Basically, in each seven-minute episode — 170 of them aired across six seasons from 2007 to 2020 — the mischievous Shaun tries to help his flock stave off utter boredom as they live out their lives on a farmer’s property. Determined to rein in the chaos is Bitzer, the farmer’s sheepdog, and Shaun’s frenemy. Since the animals, including the bad-buy pigs, don’t speak, Park and company amplified the slapstick comedy and the characters’ eyes, expressions, and, well, bleating. — IS

Shaun the Sheep streams on Prime.

61. Lamb Chop’s Play-Along

With her bright, tight red hair and infectious energy, puppeteer Shari Lewis invites kids to “play along” with her pals Lamb Chop, Hush Puppy, and Charlie Horse in each installment. Of course, most of her pals are sock puppets (we hope we didn’t ruin the illusion for anyone here!) but their personalities are all so distinct, it’s easy to forget that they each sprung from Lewis’ imagination. To ensure the show’s staying power, each episode ends with “The Song That Doesn’t End” playing over the final credits, which we are certain some people are still trapped singing after all these years. — CG

Lamb Chop’s Play-Along is streaming on YouTube.

60. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse

The Disney Channel hit Mickey Mouse Clubhouse teaches problem-solving skills to preschoolers and elementary schoolers through the interactive, computer-animated adventures of their soothingly familiar pals Mickey, Minnie, Donald Duck, and the rest of the Clubhouse game. It’s a brightly colored, tune-filled, and strangely meme-friendly romp for small children that uses music, repetition, computers, tools, and some of the most beloved characters in pop culture to educate and entertain plus its insanely infectious opening and closing songs are by They Might Be Giants. — Nathan Rabin

You can stream Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on Disney+.

59. The Wild Thornberrys

The masterstroke of The Wild Thornberrys is that Eliza Thornberry’s ability to speak to animals is a total secret. She couldn’t let anybody know, which added a level of tension and, weirdly, relatability to her otherwise fantastic life. What kid wouldn’t want to travel around the world chatting with elephants, tigers, and chimpanzees instead of going to dumb ol’ school? And yet, the fact that Eliza always had to stay guarded (with humans, at least) gave The Wild Thornberrys a sense of stakes that any viewer could get invested in. — JG

The Wild Thornberrys streams on Paramount+.

58. Pinky and the Brain

Do kids know who Orson Welles is? The joy of Pinky and the Brain, a spin-off of The Animaniacs, was that it didn’t matter if you knew who voice actor Maurice LaMarche was impersonating, it was just a hoot to watch the evil genius Brain and his dimwitted associate Pinky try to take over the world. And yet, even if ‘90s kids didn’t get the reference, Pinky and the Brain’s reverence for the pop culture of ages past is all over the show, and it’s this sometimes imperceptible sense of history that elevated the show of many Saturday morning cartoon competitors. — JG

Pinky and the Brain is available for rent on YouTube.

57. Gargoyles

The coolest show from the ‘90s is one that children today will love more than they can possibly imagine. When immortal gargoyles come to life to protect humans from bad humans, all the tropes of who is scary and who is good get inverted.

Come for the excellent gothic action adventure. Stay for a show that is deeply invested in making sure superficiality is not in your kids’ worldview, ever. — RB

Gargoyles is streaming on Disney+.

56. Scooby-Doo, Where Are You!

Is the classic Scooby-Doo series from the ‘70s full of cheap animation and extremely formulaic and repetitive plots? Yes, of course, but that’s a feature, not a bug. The basic structure of the show — four teens and their talking Great Dane drive around solving mysteries, and in every single instance the answer is “somebody was faking a supernatural event” — is a winner. There’s so much charm in each episode that pulling off the culprit’s mask never gets old. Thank goodness for those meddling kids. — JG

Scooby-Doo, Where Are You? streams on Tubi.

55. Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?

There probably weren’t many ’90s kids who were experts at world geography, but when that globetrotting criminal Carmen Sandiego was on the loose, youngsters were happy to flex whatever knowledge they had to help find her. While Carmen Sandiego was a pretty niche game show, there was a lot for audiences of all ages — and knowledge levels — to enjoy. The producers may have wanted you to come for education, but we stayed tuning in for the musical stylings of Rockapella, whose clever geography-themed wordplay was on full display in every episode. “She put the ‘miss’ in misdemeanor / when she stole the beans from Lima” still lives rent-free in our heads. — CG

Where In the World Is Carmen Sandiego is on YouTube.

54.Rocky and Bullwinkle

Jay Ward’s Rocky & Bullwinkle was to television what Mad Magazine was for print: an American institution that entertained while introducing multiple generations of children to the concepts of social satire and post-modernism. The animated variety show alternates between snappily written vignettes involving the titular duo and their Soviet-style antagonists Boris Badenov and Natasha Fatale, blundering mountie Dudley Do-Right, the time-traveling pair Mr. Peabody and Sherman, and the fantastical world of fairy tales (Fractured Fairy Tales). The result was critically acclaimed and wildly influential in proving that an audience existed for cerebral cartoons that appealed to adults as well as children. Rocky and Bullwinkle was low-budget but you don’t need money when you have this level of wit and comic sophistication. — NR

Rocky and Bullwinkle streams on Amazon Prime.

53. Double Dare

Game shows were all over network television, but Double Dare was one of the first times that kids could see themselves as the contestants. The show’s host, the affable Marc Summers, assumed his master of ceremonies role as part “cool dad” and part serious, objective enforcer of the rules, and the questions ranged from incredibly accessible to truly challenging, at least for its key demographic. But let’s be honest — the physical challenges are what kept us tuning in. Getting covered in slime, whipped cream, and all other kinds of slippery filth never looked so fun. Arguably more than any other show on the network, Double Dare best embodied Nickelodeon’s key philosophy: kids rule. — CG

Double Dare streams on Paramount+.

52. Darkwing Duck

The Disney version of Batman meets the Shadow, meets... well, a DuckTales spinoff that is beyond brilliant. In fact, Darkwing Duck is so memorable, we’re gonna go out on a limb and say it’s better than DuckTales!

Darkwing Duck suggests that the world of Disney cartoons could be wittier and less careful than some of the other Disney fare. And, unlike the somewhat problematic Uncle Scrooge or the absent father of Donald Duck, Drake Mallard is actually a great dad! — RB

Darkwing Duck streams on Disney+.

51. Power Rangers

The decision to take the special effects shots and the broadest possible plot outlines from the Japanese series Kyōryū Sentai Zyuranger and recut it, dub it, and shoot new scenes with a group of American teenagers (with attitude!) was a brilliant one. Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers (and the many, many sequels and spin-offs that would follow) are a gem. Power Rangers is full of absurd creatures and kaiju, reused footage, cheap-looking fights, and repetitive plots. None of that matters when you’re a kid — only Morphin Time matters. — JG

The classic Power Rangers are streaming on Netflix.

50. Star Wars: The Clone Wars

The live-action Star Wars shows like The Mandalorian and Ahsoka are increasingly mining the Star Wars animated series for plots — and for good reason. Star Wars: The Clone Wars contains some of the most gripping storytelling in the entire franchise, give or take an Andor.

But what makes The Clone Wars extra special is that it manages to tackle deep themes and topics — nuanced and detailed looks at how the Jedi and the Republic sowed the seeds of their own (not entirely unearned) destruction — while also being a crackerjack week to week series of adventures in a galaxy far, far away. On top of all of that, The Clone Wars gave young girls the best Star Wars character of all time, in the aforementioned Jedi hero, Ahsoka Tano. — JG

Star Wars: The Clone Wars streams on Disney+.

49. Saved by the Bell

For kids who have yet to reach high school age, Saved by the Bell painted an idyllic picture of a school that kids would actually want to go to. Who needs a cafeteria when you have The Max, a cool restaurant next door that seemingly employs students to work during the day when they should be in class? While Zack Morris and Kelly Kapowski were the main couple to watch, jock A.C. Slater and feminist (and occasional caffeine pill popper) Jessie Spano were the show’s more interesting twosome. Perhaps some held out hope that quirky nerd Screech would end up with fashionista Lisa Turtle, but alas, it wasn’t in the cards. — CG

Saved By the Bell is streaming on Peacock.

48. Family Matters

You’d be forgiven for forgetting that Family Matters is a spinoff of the sitcom Perfect Strangers, as the show quickly established its own identity — even if that identity changed over the course of its run. What began as a series centered on a Black family in Chicago morphed into a star vehicle for Jaleel White’s lovably intolerable Steve Urkel, who spent the greater portion of the show’s nine seasons causing major property damage (“Did I do that?”), conducting scientific experiments, and pining for his lovely Laura Winslow.

While the writers found clever ways to maintain interest (including stunt casting Donna Summer as Urkle’s Aunt Oona from Altoona and introducing Michelle Thomas as his girlfriend, Myra Boutros Boutros Monkhouse), the show’s quality petered off, leading to Jo Marie Payton, who played matriarch Harriet Winslow, leaving the show midway through its final season.

That said, the legacy of Family Matters is utterly wonderful for kids. Urkel was a kind of “geek icon” that generations of kids desperately needed, while the basic morality tales of each episode hold up to this day. — CG

Family Matters streams on HBO Max.

47. Animaniacs

It’s impossible to know what the real-life Warner Bros. who founded the motion picture company a century ago — their real names were Harry, Albert, Sam, and Jack — would have thought of being reimagined as anthropomorphic feline-canine creatures, but their opinion really doesn’t matter. Audiences could not get enough of Yakko, Wakko, and their equally-important and equally-frenetic sister Dot. While the Warners were the stars of the show, it’s impossible to choose the “best” component of the series.

The theme song is an unforgettable and still easily-karaokable earworm, filled with witty wordplay and dated references (“…while Bill Clinton plays the sax…”) and besides the main trio, kids of all ages enjoyed Pinky and the Brain, Slappy Squirrel, Chicken Boo, and the rest of the cavalcade of curious creatures. There’s no studio lot in the world that’s more fun. — CG

Animaniacs is streaming on Hulu.

46. Clarissa Explains It All

Before she was Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Melissa Joan Hart commanded the role of Clarissa Darling, a somewhat normal teenager who, like most teenagers, felt like she was completely abnormal. Throughout the series, she tried to navigate through school, puberty, friendships, and family dynamics — especially when it came to her annoying little brother Ferguson. While the title seems to suggest that Clarissa was explaining how life worked, in most episodes she was just trying to figure it out. Kids tuned in for five seasons to try and figure it out alongside her. — CG

Clarissa Explains It All streams on Paramount+.

45. Freakazoid!

The best children’s entertainment is paradoxically sometimes deeply uninterested in entertaining children. That’s certainly true of the gleefully irreverent, wildly post-modern 1990s superhero spoof Freakazoid, which was executive produced by Steven Spielberg, who also appears on the show regularly as a character. The absurdist parody revolves around a mild-mannered computer geek who becomes a sort of super-powered sentient internet after a fortuitous accident. That means that he’s fast, funny, powerful, and incredibly obnoxious, a motor-mouthed, pop culture-crazed goof who is forever shattering the fourth wall and making fun of himself, his world, and everything else like a teenaged, slightly more family-friendly Deadpool. Freakazoid! feels so contemporary and ahead of its time that it’s honestly surprising it hasn’t been resurrected repeatedly the way seemingly everything else even half-tolerated has. — NR

Freakazoid! is available for rent on YouTube.

44. The Little Rascals

When Hal Roach had the idea to take a ragtag group of children of different ages, races, sizes, and singing abilities and put them on screen together in the 1920s, before television existed, he inadvertently created one of the best programs for children of all time. The Little Rascals, originally released as theatrical shorts under the title Our Gang, remain timeless.

Everyone who has seen them, or watched the well-done 1994 film adaptation, has a favorite character, sight gag, bit of wordplay, or song that was performed. While the 10- and 20-minute shorts stand alone, it’s worth tracing them down and watching in order, just to see the different generations of kids join the gang, often as very small children, and exit once they’ve aged out. For example, Spanky, easily the most popular “rascal,” first appeared when he was just three years old and lasted until he was fourteen and the series ended. For the uninitiated, might we suggest starting with “Our Gang Follies of 1938,” an unusually big-budget entry that showcases a lot of what made the series so special to this day. — CG

The Little Rascals is streaming on Freevee via Amazon Prime.

43. Garfield and Friends

Even at its Reagan-era best, Jim Davis’ newspaper and marketing bonanza Garfield was never more than a pleasant, pandering mediocrity. Film Roman improved considerably on Davis’ wildly successful if famously formulaic comic strip about a lasagna-loving, Monday-hating fat cat with a series of classic, Emmy-winning specials like Garfield on the Town and Garfield’s Halloween Adventure and then Garfield and Friends, which ran from 1988 to 1994. Lorenzo Music, who co-created The Bob Newhart Show in an earlier life, was the perfect voice for Garfield, besting even the film world’s Bill Murray in his ability to make lazy selfishness charismatic and endearing while the consummate professionals o Film Roman, the veterans behind The Simpsons, The Critic, and Family Guy, provided slickly appealing animation and character design. Unlike its inspiration, Garfield and Friends wasn’t just popular. It was good as well. — NR

Garfield and Friends streams on Tubi for free.

42. Star Trek: The Animated Series (1973)

In the 1970s, when Sesame Street dominated the Emmy Awards for best daytime children’s show, there was a brief hiccup, and, in 1975, that award went to...Star Trek. That’s right, the famous and immortal sci-fi show from the 1960s was briefly reborn from 1973 to 1974, as an animated series for children. The show ditched Captain Kirk’s fist fights from the classic show and replaced the action with more rescues, more representative, and best of all, more kooky aliens.

Though the animation style from Filmation feels stilted by today’s standards, the intelligence and wit of this series holds-up surprisingly well today. Nearly every episode presents some kind of inversion of our assumptions about the villains, and usually, problems can be resolved by talking things through, or with phasers set lightly to stun. Most interestingly, Star Trek: The Animated Series, was the first major children’s TV series to depict the death of a child’s pet on screen in the excellent episode “Yesteryear.” Yes, Fred Rogers lost his fish in 1970, be he himself is not a child. In “Yesteryear,” Spock time travels to help himself as a child, and yes helps himself mourn the loss of his adorable pet, a giant teddy bear monster with fangs. — RB

Star Trek: The Animated Series streams on Paramount+.

41. Muppet Babies (Classic)

The bold stylistic technique that made Muppet Babies unique as well as beloved unfortunately also ensures that it will almost assuredly never be available to stream in any legal format in the United States. The fondly remembered staple of Reagan-era childhoods used film clips of some of the best-known and most lucrative intellectual property in existence to illustrate the vivid fantasy world of baby versions of Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, and the rest of Jim Henson’s puppet creations.

That includes multi-billion-dollar franchises like Star Wars as well as Henson’s own creations like Labyrinth. Muppet Babies would remain charming, funny, and lovable even without movie excerpts it’s undoubtedly prohibitively difficult and expensive to clear but they lend this unique version of a classic set of characters a flavor and texture all its own. — NR

Muppet Babies streams on Disney+.

40. Peppa Pig

Peppa Pig is as English as tea time, cricket, and the Queen. The wonderfully droll adventures of porcine charmer Peppa Pig, her brother George, and their parents make life in jolly old English seem so idyllic and quaint that it famously led to a rash of fake British accents from American children who internalized the show a little too intensely. Peppa Pig represents the most irresistible, and the most irresistibly British English export since Wallace and Gromit. — NR

Peppa Pig streams on Paramount+.

39. The Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show

Bill Melendez and Lee Mendelson’s legendary Peanuts animated specials, most notably 1965’s A Charlie Brown Christmas and 1966’s It’s the Great Pumpkin, brought Charles Schultz’s American institution to television with its melancholy soul and bittersweet brilliance intact. In 1983 Melendez took a rare foray into the world of episodic television with The Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show, a series that brought Chuck and the gang to the small screen while maintaining the fragile alchemy and delicate genius of both Schultz’s comic strip and its television special spin-offs. As with the specials, The Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show eschewed professional adult voice actors in favor of actual children. In Season 2, that included Stacy Ferguson, aka Fergie of Black Eyed Peas, as Sally Brown and Peppermint Patty. — NR

The Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show is streaming on Apple TV+.

38. Arthur

What is the longest-running animated educational kids’ program in history? The answer may shock folks, but it’s Arthur. Yes, the show about a cartoon aardvark, his pals, and his family, which mined and expanded the world introduced by Marc Brown in his beloved Arthur books. The secret ingredient in the gumbo over the course of its 25-season run (1996-2022) was Arthur himself, who remains sweet, hopeful, honest, caring, earnest, creative, and more as the 8-year-old experienced the joys and challenges of life.

And those joys and challenges include everything from problem-solving, bullying, and making friends to bedwetting, death, and sibling relationships, all made age-appropriate for the show’s target audience, children ages 4 to 8. — IS

Arthur is streaming on Amazon with a PBS Kids add-on.

37. Bill Nye the Science Guy

It almost feels like a falsehood to say that Bill Nye made science “cool.” Part of the Science Guy’s whole appeal was that he was sincere, exuberant, and just a little awkward. He’s Jerry Lewis in The Nutty Professor, but actually a scientist (technically his background is in mechanical engineering). This, paradoxically, was the key to why his beloved show worked so well. There was a wonkiness to his experiments that made it so you couldn’t help but share his enthusiasm. — JG

You can rent episodes of Bill Nye on YouTube.

36. He-Man and the Masters of the Universe

If it’s been a while since you watched the original He-Man, the one thing you’ve probably forgotten is that He-Man has a totally unnecessary secret identity. But don’t let this extremely still detail make you think He-Man is somehow not a good show. In fact, just the opposite. With a ton of heart and a truly unique place in children’s adventure fiction, He-Man is better than you remember, not worse. And that’s its true secret identity: It seemed like a corny show designed to sell action figures, but, underneath that, was the real show, which was, and is, amazing. — RB

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe has a ton of episodes streaming for free on YouTube right here.

35. Thomas and Friends

There is something so charmingly, well, British about Thomas & Friends. Though later iterations of the franchise would modernize its look and storytelling, the original episodes from the ‘80s and ‘90s eschewed so much of what we think of kids TV to be today. The model train animation was deliberate and loving but also kind of janky. The trains didn’t speak; rather a narrator described all the action as if one were simply hearing a story. The whole thing is wonderfully uncanny. — JG

Thomas and Friends streams on Amazon Prime.

34. The Electric Company

The Electric Company — which cranked out 780 episodes across six seasons (1971-1977) — was the hippest, loosest children’s entertainment series ever produced. The theme song rocks, and so does the cast: Rita Moreno, Morgan Freeman, Irene Cara, and Denise Nickerson (Violet from Willy Wonka!), with Mel Brooks, Joan Rivers, Gene Wilder, Diane Keaton, Walt Frazier, and Carol Burnett among the live-action and voiceover guest stars.

The segments range from sketches to animated bits (The Adventures of Letterman!) to songs, all with a lesson, moral, or piece of advice. Yes, this seems like a dated show, but it influenced much of what came after, and it is truly unique. Again, just look at that amazing cast. (Fun fact: Paul Dooley — Molly Ringwald’s dad in 16 Candles and Pops in The Wonder Years — co-created the show.) Dont you want those folks entertaining your kids? — IS

The Electric Company is available to purchase on Amazon.

33. Molly of Denali

A relatively recent PBS series, Molly of Denali is a series that excels at representation in a way that some other so-called “classic shows” struggle with. Molly is a native of Alaska, and the show naturally, and whimsically, introduces all sorts of themes about indigenous peoples to its wonderful storylines. Of the newer crop of PBS offerings, Molly of Denali deserves the label of “instant classic.” — HS

Molly of Denali streams on PBS Kids.

32. Avatar: The Last Airbender

There’s a chance that, for a certain generation of kids Avatar: The Last Airbender is the most important TV show. The Nickelodeon series, a loving, respectful, and deeply thoughtful homage to anime and Eastern cultures, is such a masterful synergy of world-building, characters, animation, and storytelling, and all of these elements (pun intended) come together for an epic story that rivals Star Wars or Harry Potter when it comes to the impact it has had on those who fell in love with the Gaang.

If you’re looking for a show that does fantasy in a way that actually helps kids, rather than confuses them, Avatar beats the Force and Hogwarts any day of the week. — JG

Avatar: The Last Airbender streams on Netflix.

31. Gilligan’s Island

There may not have been children on Gilligan’s Island, but the misadventures of the Skipper, his little buddy Gilligan, the wealthy Howells, brainy Professor, glamorous movie star Ginger, and farm girl next door Mary Ann, who fell victim to what has to be the worst three-hour tour in history, were perfect fodder for kids who wanted to see adults in silly situations. There’s a certain joy in knowing how a story will end, especially if you don’t know exactly how you’ll get there. Just as every South Park viewer waited to find out how Kenny would meet his maker throughout the show’s first five seasons, Gilligan devotees got a kick out of knowing that, no matter how hard they tried, the seven shipwrecked acquaintances were never going to get off the island. — CG

Gilligan’s Island is streaming for free on Tubi.

30. Puffin Rock

Hands down, one of the gentlest shows for toddlers and preschoolers from the 21st century. Featuring a bunch of creatures who live on a little island near Ireland, the best thing about Puffin Rock is the constant, slightly baffled narration from Chris O'Dowd. It’s like he’s channeled his character from Brides Maids and turned it into an omniscient god for this cutesy children’s universe. Also, for parents, this unflappable voice and narration style works as a kind of inner mantra. Having a hard time? How would the Chris O’Dowd Puffin Rock narrator articulate it? See, you feel better already. — RB

Puffin Rock streams on Netflix.

29. The Magic School Bus (Classic)

Joanna Cole and Bruce Degen’s Magic School Bus books let kids use their imaginations to further bring to life the adventures of Miss Frizzle and her students, as they rode their yellow bus like a time machine into a wide variety of stories. The animated version of The Magic School Bus (1994-1997) took it to the next level, with colorful imagery, toe-tapping music, and the boundless energy provided by Lily Tomlin as the voice of Miss Frizzle. A follow-up series, The Magic School Bus Rides Again, ran for two seasons (2017-2018) and centered on Miss Fiona Felicity Frizzle (voiced by Kate McKinnon) and also featured Tomlin’s Miss Frizzle as Fiona’s older sister. — IS

The Magic School Bus streams on Netflix.

28. Tumble Leaf

The No. 1 thing this show has going for it is that it’s a visual feast. With an animation technique that utilizes stop motion, and a style seemingly borrowed from Wes Anderson, Tumble Leaf is quirky in all the right ways. It’s also, refreshingly, a show in which its young creatures solve logistical problems, rather than emotional ones. The Fig, Maple, and the rest of the Tumble Leaf crew are a stable lot and their can-do attitude and rallying cry “let’s figure this out!” is infectious. On top of all of that, the basic idea of a treasure chest called “a finding place” is brilliant. When you watch Tumble Leaf with your very young ones, they’ll want to make they’re own “finding place,” which can instantly turn household objects and forgotten toys into things of wonder. — RB

Tumble Leaf streams on Amazon Prime.

27. The Real Ghostbusters

In 1984, Ghostbusters was not a children’s brand. By 1986, the cartoon series The Real Ghostbusters changed everything. Not only did this show forever alter the pop culture definition of a “ghost” (but seriously, what were some of those creatures?) it also disabused ‘80s and ‘90s kids of their preconceived notions of the word “real.”

The first script editor on The Real Ghostbusters was comic book and sci-fi TV maestro, J. Michael Straczynski. Sci-fi fans know him as the creator of Babylon 5, the guy who co-wrote wrote the first Thor movie in 2011, and the co-creator of Sense8. If you feel like the early seasons of The Real Ghostbusters have a legitimate science fiction flavor, that’s why. Straczynski is that good. — RB

The Real Ghostbusters streams for free on Crackle.

26. Superman (1940s)

There are a lot of ways to introduce your kids to The Man of Steel, but the Max Fleischer animated shorts remains the absolute best place to start.

What do kids learn from this Superman? Well, other than the fact that he always stands up to bullies, the Fleischer shots also teach kids about the power of minimalist art forms. These shorts barely need dialogue to convey the story. Superheroes can be art, these timeless shorts are proof. — RB

All the 1940s Superman cartoons are streaming on YouTube.

25. Fraggle Rock

Kids and adults love Fraggle Rock in equal measure. This Jim Henson project serves up wildly colorful puppets, catchy songs, inventive sets, and lively humor. It’s pure entertainment with the educational elements feathered into the fun, rather than the reverse. Over the course of nearly 100 episodes (five seasons, 1983-1987), Fraggle Rock gave us Red, Boober, Wembley, Gobo, and Mokey, as well as their fellow Fraggles singing, dancing, exploring, and, occasionally working. Meanwhile, Uncle Traveling Matt spent a great deal of time in Outer Space aka the Human world. Fraggle Rock begat an animated series and, most recently, a winsome reboot, Fraggle Rock: Back on the Rock, featuring most of the same characters and their voices/puppeteers, returning too. — IS

Fraggle Rock is streaming on Apple TV+.

24. SpongeBob Squarepants

Not every kids show needs to be educational. This brings us to SpongeBob SquarePants, about a frenetic, well-meaning sea sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea, pals around with a very dopey starfish, and flips burgers at the Krusty Krab, where he works for the pirate-loving Mr. Krabs and alongside the ever-cranky Squidward. Cue day-glo animation, whipsaw-quick editing, nonstop visual and spoken jokes (some for the kids, some for the adults), and whimsical music. SpongeBob launched in 1999 and exploded into a cultural phenomenon that spawned movies (with Johnny Depp, and Keanu Reeves), a Broadway musical, tons of tie-in merch, a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade float, and on and on. And speaking of on and on, Nickelodeon continues to drop new episodes, with the show closing in on the 300 mark! — IS

Spongebob Squarepants streams on Paramount+.

23. Transformers

In some other version of this list, this show is No. 1. In 1984, the fact that anyone didn’t view the debut of Transformers as a world-shattering moment is truly shocking. The premise combines two things that little kids love: utter absurdity and utter commitment to said absurdity. Meanwhile, the sci-fi world-building of Transformers held together better than Star Wars and made several generations of children deeply attached to robots who — really think about this — transformed into cars, planes, trucks, and sometimes, cassette tapes. The brilliance of the Transformers was, when you left your house, you could imagine anything as a possible robot in disguise. They were always with you. — RB

Transformers (1984-1987) is streaming for free on Tubi.

22. The Wonder Years

Running from the late 1980s to the early 1990s, and spanning from 1968 to 1973, The Wonder Years fully deserves its reputation as one of television’s finest dramas. Kevin Arnold’s (Fred Savage) coming-of-age tale touches on first love, friendship, sibling rivalry, the fun, and the follies of middle-class family life. Everyone watching crushed hard on Winnie (Danica McKellar) and wanted a best friend like Paul (Josh Saviano). Beautifully filmed and sensitively written, the show also boasted great period costumes, a perfect theme song (Joe Cocker’s cover of “With a Little Help from My Friends”), a superb core cast, and amusing recurring characters (including Robert Picardo as Coach Cutlip). It’s a classic. — IS

The Wonder Years is streaming on Hulu.

21. Batman: The Animated Series

It’s closer to known fact than hot take to say that this was the best Batman adaptation there’s ever been or that the late, great Kevin Conroy was the best Dark Knight. Bruce Timm’s heavily noir-influenced take on the Caped Crusader is a masterpiece; a fully realized world of superheroes and crime. Though Batman: The Animated Series rarely shied away from some of the more unsavory aspects of Gotham, it was never “mature” — it just has an immense respect for its audience. — JG

Batman: The Animated Series streams on HBO Max.

20. Doc McStuffins

Created by contemporary kids show mega-genius, Chris Nee, the basic premise of Doc McStuffins takes the general conceit of Toy Story (toys are alive!) and turns it into a science-fiction hospital show. The show is relentlessly upbeat, the characters absurdly charming, and the specificity of each toy’s specific malady increasingly surprising. At some point, Doc Mcstuffins doesn’t really worry about there not being direct analogs for some of the things that need fixing with the toys. This is how hard Doc McStuffins owns its premise, which is likely the secret reason for its success. — RB

Doc McStuffins streams on Disney+.

19. Dinosaur Train

There’s no dad alive raising a fan of PBS’s greatest dinosaur show who can resist singing its title out loud, in a baritone descending A minor: “Dinosaur Traaaaaa-in.” The charming, fun, and addictive qualities of Dinosaur Train all start with the title song, written by Jim Lang (of Hey Arnold! fame) but inspired by, I don’t know, Primus? It’s a bop that outlines the very strange plot of the show: A Pteranodon has a bunch of babies but one of them turns out to be a T-Rex. They keep him and decide to go on a series of trips on a time-traveling train that takes them all over the Mesozoic era, that 80-million-year period where dinosaurs reigned.

The premise sounds like a toddler pipe dream (“Dinosaurs! And trains! And time travel!”) but thanks to Lang’s deft hand, a deluge of dino facts, properly interesting subplots, and an animation style that is like Cocomelon crawling out of the uncanny valley, the series is as watchable for a three-year-old (PBS says the show is for 3- to 6-year-olds and they’re spot-on here) as it is for the adult humming the theme songs beside them on the couch. — TT

Dinosaur Train streams on Amazon Prime.

18. The Muppet Show

The brilliance of The Muppet Show is in the simplicity of the premise. Take Jim Henson’s lovable felt and foam creations, task them with staging a variety show in a theater, toss in some hecklers, sprinkle celebrity guest stars on top, mix in a healthy amount of humor for all ages, and you have a recipe for an international hit. Much like The Flintstones, it was hard to pin down exactly who the targeted demographic was for The Muppet Show, which meant that, like The Flintstones, it really was a show for everyone. While some viewers may have tuned for the guest star of the week, the back-and-forth antics between Kermit, Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, and the rest of the gang was reason enough to keep coming back. — CG

The Muppet Show is streaming on Disney+.

17. Rugrats

Rugrats created a universe of entertaining and sometimes annoying characters, all of whom orbited around Tommy Pickles, an adorable and adventurous 1-year-old. The show’s genius is that it told its nearly 200 stories (1991-2004) from the vantage points of Tommy and the babies/toddlers around him. Parents, grandparents, and next-door neighbors, etc., were weird, unpredictable, and, of course, loving caretakers. Like some other shows on this list, Rugrats inspired flotillas of merchandise, a few films (Rugrats in Paris is fantastic), a spin-off (All Grown Up!), and a recent reboot (with much of the original voice talent returning, including E.G. Daily as Tommy). Season 2 of the new Rugrats debuts on April 14. — IS

Rugrats is streaming on Paramount+.

16. Blue’s Clues

Perfect for preschoolers, Blue’s Clues blended live-action, animation, and education into its 143 episodes (1996-2006, six seasons). Everything clicked, from likable first host Steve (Steve Burns) to the adorable animated dog, Blue, who left clues about her plans for the day, clues that Steve and the audience at home had to decipher. Blue’s Clues felt interactive and immersive. It moved unhurriedly and asked kids to decipher, interpret, or just guess, and provided long pauses following any questions it posed, giving children a moment to talk out loud or converse with a parent, sibling, or caregiver. A reboot, Blue’s Clues & You!, debuted in 2019. There are three generations of hosts, and they’re all great. — IS

Blues Clues is streaming on Paramount+.

15. Storybots

The “Ask The Experts” genre of kids TV is too often the kind of show aimed at parents who want to feel good about putting their kids in front of programming to get 30 minutes or so to themselves (while the kids are learning!). The problem is not so much that these shows don’t connect with the kids — there are tons of fantastic nonfiction kids shows — but that the delivery is just so grating. What they lack in well-written script, the hosts, often in a silly lab-coat-looking getup, try to make up for with enthusiasm and volume.

Storybots instead bring personality, with a funny collection of cartoon robots, each with their own point of view (or, you might say, learning style), and connects them with actors parents can recognize. Kevin Smith, Snoop Dogg, Ali Wong, David Cross, and Wanda Sykes show up as “experts” and they nail the roles, one and all. The writing is to thank here. “All you ask about is cats! Why always cats? Can’t I get one dog?” says Snoop Dogg in the “How Do Computers Work?” If you find yourself sitting down to explain to your kid who that computer technician actually is (“the thing about Snoop Dogg is…”), well, mission accomplished, Storybots. — TT

Storybots streams on Netflix.

14. Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood

Daniel Tiger is easily the most depressed character on this list. And that’s saying something. In nearly every single episode, Daniel has a full meltdown about something. He’s never wearing pants, and things in his neighborhood of make-believe seem to suggest he’s living in a Matrix-esque simulation. Technically a spinoff from Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, the emotional chaos of Daniel Tiger’s day-to-day is much, much darker than the show from which it came. If Bluey is the show that makes parents feel seen (and also insecure) then Daniel Tiger is the show that makes toddlers feel seen. All children do think like these characters. It’s spooky. But it’s also brilliant. — RB

Daniel Tiger (mostly) streams on Amazon Prime with a PBS Kids add-on.

13. Tom and Jerry

No cartoon has ever quite done physical comedy like Tom & Jerry (sorry Wile E.). The chase that you get in each and every episode (there are 164) is a symphony of action, with multiple movements ramping up and down, shifting expectations and, ultimately, gliding into a finish where Jerry, the mouse, escapes the clutches of Tom, the cat. But to say this cartoon is all about a chase is like saying Charlie Chaplin was a man who’s really good at falling down.

Not to put too fine a point on this storied show, but Tom & Jerry is something of a philosophical treatise, a Sisyphean allegory where the roles are clear, the tasks and outcomes predetermined, but the object lessons ever-shifting. This is most obvious in episodes where the chase is disrupted, like in “The Night Before Christmas” (1941). In this classic, Tom gets his win, locking Jerry outside in the snowy cold, and then, instead of curling up by the fire as a cat is want to do, he looks at the door in a few ensuing and excruciating seconds of silence. He is a cat without purpose, and the viewer can’t help but feel dread. Fortunately, Tom shows his “humanity” — opening the door, thawing the mouse, giving them a candy cane, and ending with the required detente. They live to chase another day. What other end could there be? — TT

Tom & Jerry is streaming on HBO Max.

12. Doctor Who

Even longtime fans of the cult British sci-fi series may not know that Doctor Who began as a children’s program. Created in 1963 by Sydney Newman and Verity Lambert for the BBC, the stated goal of Who was to use a time travel premise to introduce children to science concepts and history lessons. At the same time, Doctor Who was to be a family-friendly action-adventure series, starring a protagonist who never carried a gun, but instead, solved problems through their wits and intelligence.

Six decades later, Doctor Who has, more or less, retained that mission statement. Although the fan base is much bigger than families, and the contemporary versions of the show are better for kids 8 and up, Who has an undeniably upbeat vibe. The titular Doctor is “never cruel or cowardly,” and even in the darkest of these timey wimey adventures, the series is wise, funny, and big-hearted. In fact, in the mythology of the show, our favorite Time Lord has two hearts instead of one, which tells you everything you need to know about how the metaphors on this show work. The Doctor’s time/space machine, the TARDIS, is “bigger on the inside,” and over the years Doctor Who has proven to be capacious enough to take several generations of fans along for the journey. If you give Who a closer look through the eyes of a parent, you can see why Disney+ snatching it up for 2023 makes perfect sense. — RB

Doctor Who is currently streaming on HBO Max and BritBox. In Fall 2023, it will hit Disney+.

11. The Powerpuff Girls

Sugar, spice, and everything nice (plus a little Chemical X). Those are the ingredients that created The Powerpuff Girls, an immensely stylized and smart take on superpowers and girl power. The show had a rogue’s gallery to rival Batman’s (the verbose monkey Mojo Jojo and Him, a Yellow Submarine-inspired devil, are all-timers), and the core trio of Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup were worthy of entry into any Justice League. — JG

The Powerpuff Girls are streaming on HBO Max.

10. A Series of Unfortunate Events

The greatest middle-grade book series produced in the last twenty years is without a doubt Daniel Handler’s excellent Lemony Snicket books, including the volumes that comprise both All the Wrong Questions and A Series of Unfortunate Events. But, the 2017-2019 TV series nearly matches the brilliance of the first 13 books with one simple trick: While most adaptations of great children’s literature tend to condense, the TV version of Unfortunate Events actually managed to expand the Baudelaire saga and give us characters and scenes that were impossible to depict in the books.

The wit, style, intelligence, and pure originality of this series may never be topped. The only real negative thing to say about it is that the fact that hews so closely to the story of the 13 original books, means, there was never going to be a season 4. Certainly not for young kids, but your older kids are gonna love it. And, even if they don’t, you can just watch it by yourself. This isn’t just one of the best children’s shows ever, it’s one of the best TV shows of the past two decades. Period. — RB

A Series of Unfortunate Events streams on Netflix.

9. Octonauts

The greatest thing about the Octonauts is that it doesn’t try too hard to be excellent. Featuring a crew of brave explorers — who all just happen to be talking animals — the Octonauts travel the world in their undersea ship, the Octopod. With a musical score equal parts John Barry’s 007 and Michael Giacchino’s The Incredibles, the name of the game here is adventure above all. Each character has a catchphrase that is somehow not annoying, which blends well with a format that mixes the best elements of Star Trek, Voltron, and Thunderbirds. On top of that, The Octonauts is 100 percent non-violent and incredibly educational. Via “Creature Reports” (and later, “OctoReports”) we learn about various animal life, natural phenomenon, and more. The Octonauts is a show with a conscience that is never preachy. It’s also full of wit without resorting to banal “quirkiness,” a true rarity among contemporary kids' shows. The only thing bad about this show is that parents will wish it existed when they were in preschool, too. — RB

The Octonauts and its various standalone movies all stream on Netflix. The spinoff show, which is nearly the exact format, Octonauts: Above and Beyond also streams on Netflix.

8. Pee-wee’s Playhouse

When Pee-wee Herman invited viewers into his kaleidoscopic playhouse in the fall of 1986, the show was the only program on CBS’s Saturday morning children’s television lineup that wasn’t entirely animated. Luckily, Pee-wee and his human friends (like the mildly-flirtatious Miss Yvonne and disembodied head, Jambi the Genie) were like cartoon characters brought to life. Paul Reubens (the Clark Kent to Pee-wee Herman’s Superman) broke the children’s television mold by creating a show that was as innovative as it was retro and familiar as it was unique. Where else could you see someone jump inside of a puppet, like the Magic Screen, make a spaceship by playing connect the dots, and then flying into space… just moments before or after watching a classic cartoon from the 1940s. Week after week, Pee-wee encouraged kids to be creative, take up space (sometimes just by screaming “real loud” at the secret word), and be the best friend—and version of themselves—that they could be.

It was a place where “anything can happen,” as Cyndi Lauper sings in the theme song, and where everyone is welcome. For all of Playhouse’s crowning achievements, perhaps one of its most significant was creating a truly inclusive environment. The 1988 prime-time Christmas Special featured a segment on Hanukkah and Black actors like Laurence Fishburne (back when he was Larry), S. Epatha Merkerson, Gilbert Lewis, and William Marshall were series regulars. The show was set in the fictional Puppetland, but things would be much more fun if the real world was like the one Pee-wee lived in. — CG

Pee Wee's Playhouse is available for rent on YouTube.

7. Wild Kratts!

Most cartoons celebrate the cute and the fuzzy aspect of animals. But there’s so much more to the animal kingdom. What about the bite of a polar bear or the long flight of a butterfly, the speed of a basilisk, or the ink shot of a squid? The Kratt Brothers — Chris and Martin — celebrate the superpowers of animals with a show that’s half animal documentary, half cartoon adventure.

Wild Kratts! the longest-running series from these real-life zoologists (the Kratt brothers also created Kratt’s Creatures, Zoboomafoo) has such staying power because of an ingenious formula. This is a show that shines a light on the badass side of all creatures great and small, explores the fragility of the natural world, and then satisfyingly takes down ecological villains all in a tightly packed 25 minutes. — JG

Wild Kratts! streams on PBS Kids via Amazon Prime.

6. Dora the Explorer

Swiper no swiping! If your toddler watches one show, let it be Dora the Explorer. The brilliance of this show is boundless. It’s a show that casually introduces English-speaking kids to Spanish while making kids who speak Spanish as their first language feel seen. It’s a show led by a young girl who is a good-natured thrill seeker and also best friends with a monkey. Dora is like Indiana Jones for toddlers. She’s immortal. She’s wonderful. The only question is: Does she live inside of a computer or what? — RB

Dora the Explorer streams on Paramount+.

5. Schoolhouse Rock!

If “knowledge is power,” as the Schoolhouse Rock! theme exclaims, then viewers of the three-minute animated educational musical segments are among the most powerful people in the world. If you grew up between the 1970s and 1990s, there’s a good chance you are familiar with the series’ distinct style—you may not know his name, but I bet you can hear Jack Sheldon singing “I’m Just a Bill” and “Conjunction Junction” right now — and even if you divorce them from the educational content, a lot of the songs still hold up as pieces of music. There have been several attempts to renew interest in the series over the years, including a recent anniversary special on ABC featuring pop artists of today, but nothing beats the originals. — CG

Schoolhouse Rock is (mostly) streaming on Disney+.

4. Reading Rainbow

LeVar Burton can lay claim to three remarkable and career-defining television roles: Kunta Kinte in Roots, a decades-long long stint as Geordi La Forge in Star Trek: The Next Generation (and its movies and spin-offs), and his work as the creator/host of Reading Rainbow. For more than 20 years as a show (1983-2006) and now as an app, Burton and Reading Rainbow encouraged kids to, yes, read, read read — but also to take the lessons from books and apply them to the real world in order to more fully experience life.

Most episodes of Reading Rainbow took a page from Mister Rogers’ factory tours: Burton would visit a place — a bowling alley in Ohio or the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington, DC., or the sandy beaches of Sanibel Island in Florida — and talk to an expert there about how that place is meaningful. The episode would then be brought together with a lesson gleaned from a picture book, read by narrators who reflected Burton’s career and personal favorites including Ruby Dee, Patrick Stewart, Alfre Woodard, Pete Seeger, Julia Child, Raul Julia, and James Earl Jones. Like Mister Rogers, the pace is slow, careful, and deliberate — just right for young minds. But Burton relied more heavily on his settings and guests to bring the real world to the kids. The many voices from each episode — of narrator, author, experts, alongside Burton — completed the promise of the theme song, brilliantly sung by Chaka Khan, that “I can go anywhere” with “friends to know, and ways to grow.” That’s Reading Rainbow. — IS

Reading Rainbow streams on Amazon Prime.

3. Bluey

It’s popular to say that Bluey is so huge because it captures the actual experience of parents trying desperately to entertain their children. This is false. Bluey presents a bizarre idealistic world in which peppy parents utterly give themselves over to every whim their children ever have.

And yet it's in that idealism where Bluey thrives. Yes, it makes parents feel a little bit guilty, but it also empowers families to spend time together in new and creative ways. From an instructive point of view, Bluey has invented more games to play with your children than, perhaps, any other show in recent memory. The show is down to Earth in the extreme, which is its superpower. In some ways, because of its obsession with the commonplace, Bluey is a kids show about nothing, which is why, it’s about everything. — RB

Bluey streams on Disney+. (But there are some episodes you can’t watch in the U.S.! Here’s our full list of banned or censored Bluey episodes.)

2. Sesame Street

Sesame Street has been on the air for over 50 years and remains the gold standard in children’s entertainment for the entirety of its run. What began as a program to supplement the education of Black and brown kids in America’s cities has grown into an internationally-recognized phenomenon, beloved by kids and adults the world over. Sesame Street’s strength is in its fun, varied, and holistic view of learning. In one segment, you can see a comedic musical vignette with a human teaching a Muppet how to tie their shoelace, and then a moment later, see an animated spot about counting to twelve. It was diverse in the way it approached edutainment, and also in the way it approached humanity—even if often expressed through Muppets like Big Bird, Grover, Telly, Elmo, Bert and Ernie, and the many others that have graced our screens over the last half-century. Sesame Street paints an idyllic neighborhood where people talk through their feelings, often with others who look nothing like them.

It’s impossible to estimate how many people were positively impacted by getting to meet Latinx characters like Luis and Maria, Black characters like Gordon and Olivia, deaf actress Linda Bove, and celebrity guests from different cultures and walks of life who passed through the Street in each episode. Every once in a while criticism springs up about the show — “It was better when I was a kid!” — but those sentiments are really about how attached we all feel to our childhood memories of sitting on the floor while laughing and learning, along with our favorite characters. No matter how old we get, a small part of us will always want to know how we can get (back) to Sesame Street. — CG.

Sesame Street streams on HBO Max and PBS Kids.

1. Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood

Fred Rogers spent 30-plus years (1968-2001) as the genial host of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, and millions of people still consider him a dear family friend, a source of calm in a storm, and a man who made simple sense of the world. Rogers walked into his house, got comfy (off came the jacket and shoes, on came the sweater and sneakers), sang “Won’t You Be My Neighbor?” and spoke directly to the camera as he addressed his audience of young kids. He told stories, introduced them to the real world (teaching them how macaroni is made, for instance), stepped into the fantasy world of the Neighborhood of Make-Believe, and welcomed friends and special guests.

His philosophy and personality influenced not just countless generations of children, but also other children’s entertainers. If there’s an alternate universe in which Fred Rogers didn’t decide to do what he did, we don’t want to know about it. He taught us to look for the helpers, and we’re lucky every day that he did. — IS

Here are all your options for streaming Mister Rogers’.

When Zoboomafoo premiered on PBS on January 25, 1999, families instantly fell in love with the high-energy Kratt brothers and the parade of live animals they interacted with during each 30-minute episode. Combining puppetry with real wildlife, its format was as unusual as some of the critters that walked, flew, and slithered across their set, and that’s what drew more eyes to the show.

You and your kids might recognize its hosts from Wild Kratts, a popular PBS series now in its seventh season. That’s the one where animated versions of the bros showcase the abilities of different animals, living a day in the life of that species while preventing bad guys from messing with the world. But the story of these zoologists begins not with flashy cartoons and super-powered animal costumes, but with a lemur puppet and his penchant for snacks.

Me, You, and Zoboomafoo

After graduating from college, Martin Kratt and his younger brother Chris traveled the world together making low-budget documentaries about animals for children. The handheld footage from these adventures became the basis of their first PBS show, Kratts’ Creatures. Aimed at preschoolers, the brothers espoused the uncanny abilities of the animal kingdom in a style that spoke to their young demographic.

Kids loved Kratts’ Creatures, and its success led the pair to a spin-off titled Zoboomafoo. Instead of sojourning across the globe, this studio show took place in a fictional reserve called “Animal Junction.” The brothers enthusiastically taught viewers about different animals with help from their co-host, a lemur who was the show's namesake. Whenever Zoboomafoo (Zoboo for short) had a snack, he burped and transformed into a speaking puppet who interacted with the Kratts and the episode’s special creature guests. A nature show for children like this was an untested and highly ambitious project, one that few believed would be popular, let alone become a reality.

“A few production managers… during the planning phase quit because they didn’t think it could be done,” Chris said in an interview with Variety in 2021. “We had this puppet lemur that was going to sometimes be the real lemur and we were going to cut back and forth between them … It freaked out a lot of seasoned television professionals.”

Undeterred, the Kratts made their risky vision come true, introducing home audiences to exotic creatures like the binturong or Kinkajous, creepy crawlers like tarantulas, beautiful birds like the kookaburra, and predators like wolves and tigers, assisted by the wise-cracking and curious lemur. There was even an episode about humans and what made them special within the animal kingdom. Whatever they were doing, it was working, as the ratings were phenomenal. It proved a hit among kids and adults, as analytics revealed high co-viewing numbers with families watching together.

The constant flow of animals on set meant production schedules were beholden to the critters, and not the humans filming them. The staff let the wild guests do their thing and kept the cameras rolling. It helped that the animals were usually babies, which typically made them easier to keep from getting into more serious mischief – even if that wasn’t always the case.

Will the real Zoboo please stand up?

Chris and Martin have been the face of kids’ wildlife shows for over two decades, but if you ask them who was the true star of Zoboomofoo, they’d answer it was the lemur. Two lemurs to be precise- one real and one hand-made - but both important to the show's success.

Gord Robertson was the voice and puppeteer for Zoboo, an experienced performer who worked on Jim Henson productions leading up to his time on the PBS Kids show. Robertson called it fun but “challenging,” often performing flat on his back on a concrete floor covered in mulch instead of the typical raised set he was used to. One thing that took some adjusting was working with the unpredictability of wild animals. Robertson was gassed by baby skunks, crushed by an elephant, and nearly mauled by a cougar (the same one seen in the opening credits), but the most harrowing misadventure nearly endangered the safety of more than just the staff on set.

“They had this bear who might have been a retired circus bear but he was a little skittish, and a bear is a bear- retired or not,” Robertson recalled in an interview from 2021. “I'm standing backstage [after they cleared the set of bystanders] and the lighting director is lying on a sofa looking at a monitor to watch the scene. We see the bear enter the shot, stand up, drop, turn, and run, and then he’s out of shot. All we hear is the clack-clack-clack of his claws running on the pavement!”

After being warned by the animal wrangler to remain still, the bear sprinted past Robertson and towards freedom through an air conditioner vent. “He crushes the vent and then gets out of the building. Just as he does that, the trainer comes around the corner and says, ‘Where's the bear?’ I look at him and say ‘Outside.’ He says ‘Outside where? I say ‘Outside!’”

This could have been disastrous, as the studio was in the middle of a highly-populated suburban area in Toronto, Canada. Luckily, the bear didn’t wander far and was quickly discovered back at his trailer. Production continued, likely with very few bathroom breaks needed by the human staff.

Caitlin O’Reilly, who helped build and wrangle puppet Zoboo, remembered the odd tasks she did to keep the faux lemur safe on the wildlife show, including “washing off camel spit, making sure the ostrich didn't poke at the puppet's shiny eyes, and ensuring the brave puppeteer didn't have spiders falling on to him while stuck in a barrel with his arm through a hole.”

Who was Zoboomafoo the animal?

When he wasn’t a puppet, Zoboo was a real animal who enjoyed his time in the spotlight. Jovian, a five-year-old Coquerel’s sifaka lemur, loved leaping all over that set and hanging out with the Kratts. He grew up in the Duke Lemur Center in North Carolina, a sanctuary for these rare and endangered animals that Martin volunteered at while attending Duke University as a zoology student.

From his soft creamy-white fur to his expressive face and bright eyes, it was impossible not to fall in love with Jovian. The young lemur was mesmerizing to watch, whether gracefully jumping across the room, climbing a ladder with his long tail following behind, or noisily chomping on a banana. "He'd jump in through the window and we'd feed him mangoes or garbanzo beans,” Martin recalled in an interview from 2014. “Sometimes he'd grab our noses with those soft sifaka hands."

A second identical “Animal Junction” set was built in North Carolina to record the lemur scenes without moving them far from their habitat. Jovian, along with parents Nigel and Flavia, pranced and leaped on this set, using that footage for Zoboo throughout the series. Nigel and Flavia showed up simultaneously with their offspring during the episode “Happy Lemur Day,” an episode all about lemurs that celebrated Zoboo’s birthday, with his parents appearing alongside their famous ring-tailed son.

Jovian sadly passed away in 2004 at 20 years old, but his legacy continued with his other adorable family members, including children of his own.

While Zoboomafoo only lasted 65 episodes across two seasons, its presence helped elevate the Kratt brothers into the premier hosts for kids’ nature shows. Today, Wild Kratts is one of the most popular cartoons on PBS, and a lucrative one as well with toys, books, and other products helping this show maintain its boa-constrictor grip on children’s entertainment.

A Zoboomafoo reboot was announced in early 2020, but there have been zero updates four years later. While it’s been two decades since Zoboomafoo left the airwaves, there are still ways to watch it online or on physical media. It’s worth introducing it to your wild animals, especially if it makes them leap like a lemur to learn more about the wonders of nature.

Zoboomafoo is streaming on Amazon Prime.

The 21st century has been the century of dads. Never before has the idea of being a father become part of the national conversation, and never before have dads faced an onslaught of shifting mores and expectations.

Regardless of the chaos we’ve experience in the last twenty-five years, it’s been a decent time to be a father. Scratch that — it’s probably the best point in human history to be a dad.

Sure, you might have spent more time with the family on the farm in the 18th century, but that was primarily as a manager for your child laborers. If you were parenting during the industrial revolution, let’s just say the whole child labor thing got a lot worse — and off your watch. And what of the booming ’40 and ’50s, those supposed halcyon days that are so often held on high? Don’t let false nostalgia fool you — the infant mortality rate alone tells a different story: It has dropped 85% since the Baby Boom.

It’s truly never been easier to raise a healthy and maybe even happy kid — and the past 25 years bear the fruits of this fact. From public policy shifts to pop culture moments, to an evolving conversation about the nature of masculinity, the past twenty-five years have been full of great moments for fatherhood.Here are twenty-five of our favorite moments so far this century, all of which highlight how the culture of being a dad has grown, changed, and been celebrated

25. Jerry Seinfeld’s Alligator Joke (2020)

If you’re not a dad, it’s easy to assume that Jerry Seinfeld stopped being relevant in the 1990s. But, one of the wonderful things about the 21st-century Seinfeld, is seeing this venerable comedian turn into a Dad Comic. In his 2020 special 23 Hours to Kill, Seinfeld brilliantly compares parenting to keeping a baby alligator in your house.

“You put it in your tub…and you feel the little…bitey…teeth. And then time passes, and you think — You know, I think we have to get this thing the hell out of here!”

24. Nick at Nite’s First Animated Series (2004)

While it’s fair to say that the legacy of Bill Cosby has been tarnished, it is significant that the very first animated series to ever air on Nick at Nite is a now-defunct show called Fatherhood.

To be clear, Cosby wasn’t really in the show, and though it was based on one of his books called Fatherhood, this show was very much its own thing. It’s sort of hard to imagine an animated show called Fatherhood in 2025, but that doesn’t mean there shouldn’t be.

For what it’s worth, Cosby isn’t the only person who has a book titled Fatherhood. The editors of Fatherly published one, too, back in 2021. And ours is almost as funny as the Nick at Nite cartoon.

23. Chris Pine Gets Outer Space Daddy Issues (2009)

We’re gonna have two mentions of the Star Trek franchise on this list, so get ready for that. But, honestly, in terms of fascinating pop culture moments around fatherhood, the J.J. Abrams-directed 2009 Star Trek reboot has to be discussed. First of all, the trailers for this movie really used this tagline: “This is not your father’s Star Trek.”

The funny thing was, with that sh*t-eating grin, Chris Pine’s James T. Kirk was very much representative of an old-school take on Star Trek, a ton of action, punching, and one-liners. The movie was also literally about fathers and sons, and how people forge their own paths outside of the legacy they’re expected to carry. Plus, can you believe that a pre-Thor Chris Hemsworth played Chris Pine’s dad?

21. George Lucas Put All His Kids In Star Wars Secretly (2005)

Today, George Lucas has four kids in total, but during the era of the Star Wars prequels, from 1999 to 2005, he had three: Amanda, Katie, and Jett. And all of them were in Star Wars. But, because Lucas is classy and didn’t want to make this into a big nepotism thing, those kids are all in fairly under-the-radar, secret roles.

Katie was even credited as “Jenna Green” for a background role in The Phantom Menace. Meanwhile, Jett plays a young padawan named “Zett Jukassa,” seen briefly in Revenge of the Sith. Finally, Amanda had a small background role in Revenge of the Sith, alongside her father.

20. Dads Change Their Story (2022)

Is being a father the way you see yourself? If you were a dad in the 20th century, the answer would be very different than it is today. According to a Pew Research Center survey published in 2023, 85 percent of fathers with kids under 18 claim that being a parent is either the most or one of the most “important aspects of who they are as a person.”

This is huge. Identifying as a father first is simply something that wasn’t in vogue a few decades back. In the 1980s, comedies like Mr. Mom seemed edgy because of a challenge to gender norms. Now, those gender norms are utterly different.

19. Ben Stiller’s Royal Tenenbaums Dad Skewers Helicopter Parents (2001)

Though the late Gene Hackman’s portrayal of patriarch Royal Tennenbaum gets a lot of the attention in The Royal Tenenbaums, this modern classic has another great dad role model. Yes, Ben Stiller is the man who gave us Zoolander, and currently, the mind behind Severance. But, in Wes Anderson’s modern classic, he also gave us a tender and hilarious portrayal of fatherhood.

Chas Tenenbaum is a widow, and as such, strives to be the ultimate parent, concerned with safety, and essentially begins the movie as a laughable helicopter parent. But by the end of the movie, Chas makes peace with his own dad, his demons, and learns to lighten up a bit. We could all have a bit of this character’s desire for organization for our kids. And we could all learn to change, too.

18. Dwyane Wade Supports His Kid (2023)

People can disagree on various issues around youth sports, but one thing all dads know is true is simple: You’ve got to support your kids. And so, NBA legend Dwyane Wade’s support of his daughter, Zaya Wade, is an exceptional example of what it looks like when dads step up.

On February 25, 2023, at the 54th NAACP Image Awards, Wade made it clear that standing with Zaya, who is trans, was his duty as a father. “Zaya, as your father, all I’ve wanted to do was get it right,” he said. “I admire how you’ve handled the ignorance in our world ... that you face every day. To say that your village is proud of you is an understatement. Thank you for showing me that there’s more than just one way to communicate effectively.”

17. Eminem Sings About His Daughter (2002)

The fact that Eminem sings a track rather than raps would be a significant cultural moment. But, Eminem’s “Hailie’s Song” in 2002 was a bigger deal than perhaps we’ve admitted. Prior to “Hailie’s Song” the image of Eminem was a little less sympathetic, but the utterly honest sentiment of the song for his daughter changed all that.

It’s a song about a parent trying to explain the conflicting emotions inside all of us. Whether or not Eminem is a great dad or not isn’t the point. This song was a big deal.

16. Amazon Finally Gets Reacher Right (2022)

Go to a party and talk to a dad about what they’re reading. At least half the time, if you mention Lee Child’s Jack Reacher books, you’re going to get a big smile. Boomer dads love Reacher. GenX dads love Reacher. Millennial dads love Reacher. Currently, the Amazon Prime Video version of Reacher is one of the biggest shows on the planet, which makes sense since the fan base has been ready for this show since 1997.

But what’s significant about Reacher as a TV series is that it’s a vast improvement over the forgettable Tom Cruise movies Jack Reacher (2012) and Jack Reacher: Never Go Back (2016). Crusie was totally miscast as Reacher in those films, and as such, those flicks nearly ruined an excellent action franchise. Reacher is popular because he’s a vargant Sherlock Holmes fused with an American James Bond. Alan Ritchson’s take on the character has done what Cruise couldn’t do: Bring Reacher to the people.

15. Matthew McConaughey Talks About His Dad’s Death (2025)

Although Matthew McConaughey’s father passed away in 1992, he’s more recently come forward about how that death impacted him and his worldview. “Through the mourning and the pain, it’s the biggest moment of becoming a man.”McConaughey explained in a 2025 conversation with Interview. “There’s a certain safety net that I’ve always had behind me that’s gone.”

For many of us, McConaughey is like a Texan version of Yoda; he seems like he contains endless wisdom, and his approach toward life, love, and family is endlessly inspirational. And so, for him to be so clearly vulnerable about losing a parent is incredible. Losing a parent rewires your brain, regardless of age.

14. Harry Potter Creates Blockbuster Book Lines (2000)

There had never really been midnight releases for books until the year 2000. And this meant that the beginning of the century was kicked off with moms and dads driving their little witches and wizards to bookstores to get the latest Harry Potter books.

While the first three books were very successful, the release of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire in the year 2000 created an utterly new phenomenon. Many kids were driven to these midnight events by their parents, and a ton of those kids are parents now themselves.

We have a complicated relationship with Hogwarts and the Wizarding World these days, but for parents and kids, the Harry Potter midnight madness was a uniquely 21st-century event.

13. Facebook Dad Groups Become a Thing (2006)

As soon as Mark Zuckerberg made Facebook available to the general public, the era of the chat room officially died, and the world of Facebook groups was born. Today, Facebook skews a bit older than some of the other social media platforms, and that’s probably because 19 years ago, contemporary dads were all still in their twenties.

We got on Facebook back then, we created friend groups around different interests (Soccer, Video Games, Seinfeld memes), and now, we’re still there. Facebook groups didn’t start as Dad Groups, but that’s what time does to you.

12. LeVar Burton Unites With Daughter On Screen For Star Trek (2023)

If there’s anyone who really should have the title of America’s TV Dad, it’s LeVar Burton. Not only did he raise generations of readers on Reading Rainbow, thanks to his role as Geordi La Forge in Star Trek: The Next Generation, but he also inspired countless people to tackle the STEM fields in new and innovative ways.

In 2023, Burton brought all of this metafictionally full circle. In the critically acclaimed Season 3 of Star Trek: Picard, Burton co-starred with his real-life daughter, Mica Burton, who played his onscreen daughter, Alandra La Forge. When those episodes aired, Fatherly talked to Burton about how Geordi was portrayed as a sweetly overprotective parent. Burton’s response was perfect: “I don’t know a dad who’s not overprotective. All dads are overprotective. I mean, we live in a culture and in a society where that is our primary responsibility, to protect, defend, and provide for. That’s why we’re here.”

11. The National Shepherds In A New Era of “Dad Rock” (2010)

Today, it is well understood that The National is the most “dad rock” bands currently in existence on the planet. But this wasn’t always the case. There’s no way the band thought of themselves this way back in the early aughts, but something changed after the release of their 2010 masterpiece High Violet.

Without really meaning to, The National transitioned from being a really good band to the most important rock band for a certain kind of 30-something and 40-something man. High Violet is the beginning of the version of The National we have now, and fifteen years later, we still owe money to the money, to the money that we owe.

10. Avengers: Endgame: “I Love You 3000” (2019)

When Robert Downey Jr. uttered the words “I am Iron Man” in 2008, it changed the game for male cinematic heroes. And so, it’s still hard to grasp that just eleven years later, in Avengers: Endgame, the heroic Tony Stark would die. But the most compelling thing about the journey of fatherhood across the saga of Iron Man wasn’t him defeating Thanos. Instead, it was Tony’s relationship with his daughter, Morgan Stark (Lexi Rabe).

As all dads know, sometimes kids come up with hilarious phrases to express their affection, and Lexi’s “I love you 3000” remains perfect because it’s so real.

9. Dax Shepard Embraces the Madness of Paw Patrol (2020)

One of the toughest afflictions that parents have to suffer in the modern age is the existence of a militia of mutant canines hellbent on providing alternative forms of law enforcement, healthcare, and basic public safety. We don’t know if the Paw Patrol is funded at all by taxpayer money, and we don’t want to know. (In the 2021 movie, we’re meant to think raw capitalism funds the Paw Patrol.)

In any case, Paw Patrol is a whole thing, and so, the moment in which Dax Shepard both embraced and mocked Paw Patrol in an ad for Paw Patrol was a perfect catharsis. Paw Patrol kind of sucks, but it also knows that it sucks.

8. Dads Get More Protections (2019)

Paid paternity leave is more robust in the 2020s than it's ever been before. In fact, laws around giving employees paid paternity leave have only been strengthened in the past few years, not weakened. If you are a new dad and you’re wondering about taking time off in those early months, you shouldn’t really wonder. There’s a whole world of benefits for dads out there that simply weren’t as prevalent in the previous century.

No excuses, check out our guide to paid time off right here.

7. James Bond Dies to Save His Daughter (2021)

Daniel Craig’s 2021 swan song as James Bond wasn’t necessarily the best-loved 007 movie of all time, but it did deliver one of the best dad moments of the century. For decades, James Bond was a symbol beloved by dads, but a character who existed in a childless space.

No Time To Die flipped the script on all of that, by revealing that 007 has a five-year-old daughter, Mathilde Swann (Lisa-Dorah Sonnet), whom Madeleine Swann (Léa Seydoux) has kept a secret. By the end of the movie, Bond has to die to make sure Madeleine and Mathilde can live. It would have been nice for Bond to live and be a family man, but as a symbol, the idea that 007 ends his life for his family was a powerful moment.

6. Bandit Emerges as the Greatest Cartoon Dad Ever (2018)

Regardless of how you feel about Bluey, the fact of the matter is that in terms of cartoon dads, the character of Bandit (voiced by David McCormack) has eclipsed all other cartoon dads. Not as overtly progressive as Daniel Tiger’s dad, but also not as horrible and useless as, say, Homer Simpson, the character of Bandit straddles the line between realism and aspiration with impressive nuance.

We may not all want to be Bandit at all times, but there is some version of various dads in him. Like it or not, this is the one that all future cartoon dads will be compared to.

5. BBC Dad (2017)

When Professor Robert Kelly had a work call interrupted while on global news, a meme was born. He didn’t mean to become “BBC Dad,” but the hilarious moments in which his Kelly’s children waltzed into his work-from-home office touched a nerve with the parenting population of the world.

Ironically, just a few years later, after the lockdowns of 2020, many of us became BBC Dad, and in truth, many of us still are. The nice thing about BBC Dad, was that we could all agree that it was normal for your kids to exist right alongside your professional life. Things are messy, and you’re doing a lot of jobs at the same time. For many of us, it seems like our working hours never end, and that’s because, in truth, as a father, you’re never off the clock.

4. The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2001-2003)

Prior to the 21st century, nobody needed to explain why J.R.R. Tolkien’s books were wonderful. And yet, in 2001, with the debut of Peter Jackson’s big screen adaptation The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, an entirely new pop culture vocabulary was codified. Fathers benefited from this because they either shared the films and the stories with their kids for the first time or were kids themselves when these films hit theaters. (Using Hobbit math, we’re counting being a teenager or being in your early 20s as a “kid” here.)

For those who haven’t read Tolkien out loud to their kid, you’re missing out. And, it’s possible, without the popularity of The Lord of the Rings movies, several generations of parents wouldn’t have had the renewed permission to do so.

3. Obama Cements His Legacy as Father-in-Chief (2021)

Of all 21st-century presidents, regardless of party or ideology, Barack Obama is easily the best symbol of a father figure who is as aspirational as he is relatable. As the dad of Sasha and Malia, Obama was present and also honest about his shortcomings.

In 2021, Fatherly spoke to President Obama about how to find time to slow down and see your child grow up. He mentioned coaching Sasha’s basketball team, “even in the midst of the presidency.” He talked about the sheer “joy” of those moments, and regretted that he hadn’t “planned to have more of that” and a little “less of meetings in the situation room.”

The reason this is so powerful is that Obama, like so many dads, admits when it gets it wrong. Having regrets and feeling like you wanted to be more present is part of the journey of fatherhood, and as a leader and example for other dads, Obama gets it.

2. Bob Odenkirk Writes a Hilarious Book With His Daughter (2023)

Whether you think about Bob Odenkirk as one part of Mr. Show, or maybe Saul from Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul, the truth is, the man is a national treasure. Brilliantly, he also showed parents everywhere how to be better at their most important job.

In 2023, along with his daughter Erin (who provided the illustrations), Odenkirk released a collection of children’s poetry called Zilot. Here’s the thing: These poems were ones that Odenkirk wrote with his kids when they were much smaller. “I want to tell everyone, any parent who's thinking of trying this, and I hope you are, that I really did let the kids write the poems,” Odenkirk told Fatherly when the book was released. The result was not only a great book (seriously, quirky kids will love it) but also an important lesson to parents everywhere: Make things with your kids.

1. Dads Become 33% More Involved In the New Century (2020s)

During the age of the Baby Boomers, it was still possible to think of dads as distant, uninvolved people. Martin Amis described this phenomenon as being a “parent emeritus.” You’ve got the title. You’re hanging around. But what do you actually do?

This attitude has shifted substantially in the 21st century. As of 2022, according to The Institute for Family Studies, college-educated fathers with children under age 18 at home now spend an average of 10 hours, 12 minutes a week on child care. Overall, the trend indicates that dads are 33 percent more involved with caregiving than they were in the previous century. Basically, the new generations of dads are nothing like the dads we grew up with. Which, hopefully, means the future will be even better.

The first month that you have a child is life-changing in ways that are hard to describe. While there is plenty of scientific research to back up the idea that fathers get their brains rewired by having a child, the biggest change that occurs is that your concept of time is forever altered. And that’s why, at the start of your child’s life, you need to take some time off. Taking paternity leave is one of the most important things a dad can do, not just for their partner and their child, but for themselves. This may seem obvious on paper, but the vast majority of men who have access to reasonable paternity leave benefits end up not taking advantage of it.

Don’t become a statistic. Your time will become more precious to you than ever before once you’re a parent. And paternity leave is the only buffer you have to get yourself and your family adjusted to the new normal.

Here’s how dads need to advocate for paternity leave, and what to do with your time once it happens.

Paternity Leave Should Be a Given

Regardless of the job you're in or the pay structure, the conversation with your boss about leave shouldn’t be a question of permission, it should be a conversation about how much time you’re taking off. There may be some legal questions about what your state is technically obligated to offer you, so certainly do your homework first. But, even in the absence of a clear paternity leave policy, you shouldn’t be begging for time, but rather, approaching the conversation as a negotiation for exactly how much time is reasonable for you, versus what makes sense for your job.

If your job already has a paternity leave policy, the amount of time you should take should be the maximum amount offered. “But I don’t need all that time?” you say. Well, you probably do.

You’re going to end up needing other parenting time off, and you’re going to have to negotiate a new relationship with work. This is one of the many things that paternity leave does. From pretty much now until the end of time you will have someone else’s schedule on your mind. This will impact your work schedule — not for better or worse, it just will — and paternity leave is your transition to this new juggling of schedules. In another sense, you’re setting a precedent with your job. Do you want it to be one that is sustainable? If so, take paternity leave.

Paternity Leave Is The Ultimate Career Pivot

No matter how you think of your career, having a kid is, without question, a pivot point for it. Before now, work-life balance was more of a theory; a calculus about how many drinks you could have at happy hour versus how hungover you’d be the next day. Having a child makes all of those prior considerations seem quaint. And so, the best way to think about paternity leave is that it’s the transition from one kind of career to the next.

In your previous life, you managed your time and money, perhaps, with a shoulder shrug and a “good enough” mentality. But being a parent isn’t like that. Everything you do, from hitting a deadline to taking out the trash, matters a little bit more. Good enough isn’t really good anymore. Yes, you’re going to make mistakes. That’s what parenting is all about. But it’s also nothing like a job. You’re not clocking in and out. If you think you’re suddenly going to have time off from being a parent, you won’t.

This is what makes time management so crucial — and why you need to take paternity leave to get your new schedule in order. Because you’re not at work, you are able to live in this period of transition. It’s weird. It’s hard. But without paternity leave, you’d barely be able to process it.

Housework & The Not-So-Invisible Labor You’re About to Take On

Unless you are the primary caregiver who is nursing with the child, the vast majority of the time you’ll have a job that will suddenly be more important than you’ve ever realized — cleaning up. When it comes to bottles, breast pump parts, new baby clothes, and blankets, keeping everything clean in those early months is essential. If your wife was the person who did laundry before, or kept an eye on your dirty dishes, those days are over.

Here’s a hot tip: Do you still have your apron from when you waited tables? Don’t have an apron? Get an apron. Preferably one with pockets. It's great for storing bottles, burp clothes, diapers, and pretty much everything else to keep your household sane.

Embrace Your New Relationship With Sleep

When you add it all up, parents lose about six years of sleep when they have a child. This will not magically get resolved when your child turns six, by the way. But the strange sleep patterns that you have during those first few weeks are truly hellish. The only way to deal with this is to accept it as soon as possible. Again, this is one of the reasons why paternity leave is so important. Both you and your partner are going to have to come up with an ad hoc sleep schedule in order to literally not lose your minds.

The sooner you understand that feeding and caring for a newborn is like working a double shift that never ends, the better. If you slept on a few chairs pushed together in the delivery room when your kid was born, the first month or two aren’t too different from that. It does get better, but the sooner you get over how horrible it is, the better.

Take Pictures. Hold Your Kid

Chances are, your partner will be even more exhausted than you are. And so, amid all the cleaning, helping, and wrestling in your mind with your raging id, you have to remember how special this time is. Yes, take a ton of pictures. No, you’ll never regret taking a million pictures when your child is a newborn. If anything, these photos will become even more incredible to you as the years pass. You’re lucky to live in a time when you have a movie studio in your pocket. Take advantage of it. Pay for the extra phone data. Get those digital photos printed up into albums right away. It’s all worth it.

But when you’re not being the support parent, when you’re not contemplating how the rest of your life is forever different, the best thing you can do is hold your child as much as possible. You’ve probably heard of the “football” grip by now, the thing where you can fit your kid into the crook of your arm. This is one of the coolest things ever, and it may seem like it will never end, but you won’t believe how fast this time goes.

Newborn babies sleep all the time. Yes, statistically, they’re going to do a big chunk of that sleeping with mom. But you’re on paternity leave for one big reason, a reason that is more important than all the other reasons: You need to put that kind on your chest, and in your arms, and make sure this little person knows that they are safe with you, forever.

We know how women’s bodies adapt to motherhood. Hormonal shifts, neurological flips, and, of course, the obvious post-partum biological changes. But only recently have scientists begun to focus on how men’s bodies adapt to fatherhood. We now know that fathers experience changes in their hormone levels (especially testosterone and oxytocin); their brains respond differently to parent-related stimuli, and even their socioeconomic status tends to change once children arrive.

Here’s the data behind these conclusions:

Fathers Experience A Testosterone Dip, An Oxytocin Spike

In 2014, a team of scientists at Emory University recruited 88 heterosexual, biological, married fathers of children between the ages of 1 and 2, for an unprecedented experiment. They tested their hormone levels (among other metrics) and compared these results to a group of 50 non-fathers. One of the most striking results is depicted below. Compared to non-fathers, dads had lower levels of testosterone, a male hormone linked to aggression, and higher levels of oxytocin, a hormone thought to play a role in maternal (and now, perhaps, paternal) attachment. The findings suggest that fathers, not just mothers, experience hormonal changes to help them adapt to their new roles as highly attached and less aggressive caregivers.

Dad Brains Change, Too

After running the hormone analysis, the researchers at Emory took the experiment one step further. They hooked each man up to an fMRI—which measures activation of different brain regions—and show him images of children and adults making happy, sad, and neutral faces. In the middle frontal gyrus, a brain region responsible for face emotion processing, fathers’ brain activities spiked for children’s faces significantly more than for adult faces. As depicted below, non-father brains made no such distinction. The results suggest that fathers’ brains change, too, helping them augment empathy towards children.

It’s Not Just Your Body And Brain: It’s Your Wallet

Beyond the biological implications of fatherhood, studies have shown that men with children experience psychological and social changes, too. But, unlike women who take pay cuts when they give birth, the financial impact of fatherhood on men is quite positive. The data below comes from City University of New York research, which found that fathers in the city have made more money, on average, than non-fathers since at least 1990. It is unclear whether the sudden burden of diapers and saving for college drives men to earn more, or whether it’s simply wealthier men who choose to start families. But one thing is clear from the preponderance of research: fatherhood changes men. Financially, hormonally, and neurologically.

The nicknames we use for parents go in and out of fashion, age to age and era to era. At one time, men preferred “Sire.” Other times, “Father” was preferable. What we do know is that the most agreed-upon way to refer to dad these days is by calling him, well, ‘dad.’

But why have we ditched ‘father’ for dad? The short answer is that things have gotten a little less formal. But the reason we’ve moved away from formality is that we’ve embraced what’s more linguistically natural for children and parents. ‘Father’ comes from the Proto-Indo-European “pəter” and Old English ‘fæder,’ meaning “he who begets a child,” reflecting the baby-talk sound “pa” as well as a phonetic shift from ‘p’ to ‘f’ in Middle English.

However, ‘dad’ did not evolve from ‘father.’

“It’s from ‘dada,’” says Professor John H. McWhorter, a professor at Columbia University, “a natural sound from children’s mouths as a second stab at consonants after they try the most natural ‘mama.’ Next is often either ‘dada, ‘tata,’ ‘baba’ or … ‘papa.’ Upon which, ‘father’ starts in Proto-Indo-European as “puh-TAIR,” and the ‘puh’ part is this same thing: what started as ‘pa’ in ‘papa.’ The words for Mommy and Daddy are the closest thing to linguistic universals because they are about mouth anatomy in infants rather than thought.”

There are also another key reason why this is reinforced over time. Emie Tittnich, a specialist at the University of Pittsburgh, speaking to Live Science, noted that parents generally refrain from using pronouns like ‘I’ or ‘you’ to avoid confusing their kids with abstract concepts early on. “‘Parents will use [‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’] to help their children learn the role names and also to indicate the relationship, ‘mommy and me,'” says Tittnich. “It usually takes the child awhile to understand that the same person can be called two different names.”

The agreed-upon naturality of these linguistic principles mean that as American society has become more colloquial and secular over time, we move (at least in this instance) away from a term that’s reflective of a status quo based in rigid concepts of class and religion—one of the meanings of ‘fæder’ in Old English is ‘supreme being,’ according to the Online Etymology Dictionary. As a result, we’re generally caught off guard when we hear a child refer to a parent as ‘father.’

However, this is not the case unanimously. We spoke with six dads who prefer — or simply stuck with — ‘father’ instead of ‘dad.’ Some do it as an homage to their own fathers; others do it to sound more authoritative. Others do it because it’s what their kids like. All have their reasons and, maybe, deep inside, some are just big fans of Proto-Indo-European language. Here’s what they say.

It’s What My Father Preferred

I sometimes worry that it sounds a little austere out loud, but it’s just what my father always asked us to call him, and it felt like it was important to me that we carry that on. No one in my family has had a problem with it. I think you can still be a ‘dad’ and be called ‘father,’ if that makes sense. It’s basically semantic, in that way, but it’s also more than semantics. — John, Baltimore, MD

It's What My Kid Decided to Call Me

It’s less of a request or a demand or anything, but when we were teaching my oldest what everything is called, we always just said ‘this is your mother’ and ‘this is your father,’ and he liked to say that, too. So we’ve kept it. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think it was just adorably proper to have our little man coming up to us and saying, “father, mother, may I use the bathroom,” or what have you. But as with everything, I don’t mind anything that seems to feel natural for my kids and makes them happy. — Eric, Austin, Texas

We’ve Always Been a More Traditional Family

My son didn’t start until he was older. I think he thought it sounded more respectful, or just more professional. We’ve always been a more traditional family, in how we carry ourselves, I guess you would say. So perhaps this was his way of taking that in stride, or contributing to that. My wife teases me about it sometimes. I should clarify, it’s generally him introducing me to other people that way. ‘This is my father, have you met my father?’ etc. — Patrick, Twin Cities, MN

It Just Sort of Stuck

In the past two years, my older daughter, age 21, began calling me ‘father’ and as strange as I found it, I didn’t mine it at all. Now, my four-year-old calls me “father” and I guess I now have a new title. As long as I am not being called ‘Henry,’ I am okay with it. — Henry, Boston, MA

It’s a Bit More Authoritative

I have eight children—three boys and five girls. I’ve always asked that they call me ‘father’ not to be domineering but because the house could get a little chaotic, as you can imagine, and my wife and I felt that it was a label that was more authoritative and kept things from being too chaotic. ‘Please don’t touch your father’s golf clubs’ just has a better ring to it, I guess. — Elliott, Charlotte, NC

It Instills a Sense of Responsibility in Me

I love that my children call me ‘father,’ because of the sense of responsibility it instills in me. Your ‘dad’ or ‘daddy’ is there to lend you the car, your ‘father’ is there to raise you, and protect you and make sure that you have the tool you need to succeed in life. When my kids call me ‘father,’ it reignites that sense of purpose for me every day, and reminds me it’s up to me to make their world a great place to grow up in. — Sam, Alachua Country, FL

Research has shown that when dads are engaged and present, kids do better. We celebrate dads on Father’s Day because we should celebrate everything that makes children’s lives — and outcomes — better. When children have close relationships with father figures, they tend to avoid high-risk behaviors; have higher-paying jobs and healthy, stable relationships; and have higher IQ test scores. The benefits go on, but one thing’s for sure: Dads matter in the lives of children, and so we should support and celebrate their presence in their kids’ lives.

Here are just a few organizations that champion dads and understand the integral role that fathers play in the lives of their children.

All Pro Dad

All Pro Dad is a program of Family First that provides tools and resources to dads that allow them to be more present in the lives of their children. Spearheaded by former NFL coach Tony Dungy, NFL player Benjamin Watson, ESPN personality Dan Orlovsky, and many other prominent sports figures, All Pro Dad hosts a yearly interactive get-together for kids and dads at an NFL or NCAA stadium and a monthly school program where dads meet up with their children at school to spend time bonding and relationship building.

Donate to All-Pro Dad here.

Center for Family Policy and Practice

The Center for Family Policy and Practice is a nonprofit organization that advocates for fair and equitable laws and policies that affect low-income families and fathers. Focusing on child support, family safety and security, and financial and economic security, the CFPP acts as a think tank to develop solutions to barriers experienced by low-income fathers and fathers of color.

Donate to the Center for Family Policy and Practice here.

Child & Family Blog

The Child & Family Blog provides research-driven content on the impact of family on social, emotional, and cognitive child development. In addition to covering topics like race, divorce, and inequality, the Child & Family Blog covers research on the importance of fathers and the role they play in both the family dynamic and the development of children.

Donate to the Child & Family Blog here.

Family Equality Council

The Family Equality Council works to ensure that members of the LGBTQ community have the ability to create families and provide support, education, activism and advocacy, and the resources they need to become parents and foster loving, healthy family relationships. The FEP also tracks national and state legislation that affects the ability of LGBTQ couples to become parents and maintain parental rights.

Donate to the Family Equality Council here.

Fathering Together

Fathering Together provides anyone who identifies as a father with tools and resources to uplift and support them as they work to create a “more equitable society.” The organization hosts different communities so that dads from every walk of life can reach out to peers for help, support, and advice while working to make the world a better and safer place for their children.

Donate to Fathering Together here.

The Fatherhood Project

The Fatherhood Project is a Massachusetts-based program that empowers fathers to become more “knowledgeable, active, and emotionally engaged with their children.” Through research-based principles and curricula and programs like Dads Matter, Dads in Recovery, Teen Dads, and Divorcing Dads, the organization aims to help all dads be more present and engaged with their children while focusing on dads in marginalized and underserved communities.

Donate to The Fatherhood Project here.

Fathers Incorporated

Fathers Incorporated is an Atlanta-based nonprofit that works with federal lawmakers and leaders in the responsible fatherhood movement, faith and business leaders, and family law practitioners to advocate for legislative and community changes that promote fathers’ involvement in the lives of their children. The group focuses on co-parenting, domestic violence, incarceration, child development, child support, and employment and financial stability. Fathers Incorporated provides resources and programs for fathers to engage with their children healthily and raise awareness through programs like the Million Fathers March and Black Dads Count.

Donate to Fathers Incorporated here.

Fathers’ Uplift

Fathers’ Uplift is a one-of-a-kind organization that provides fathers with the tools they need to overcome trauma, addiction, racial barriers, and emotional issues to help them fully engage with their children and families. Fathers’ Uplift provides therapy, coaching, training opportunities, and youth enrichment with the aim of reducing the number of children raised without positive father figures in their lives. It is the only organization in the United States that offers therapy, counseling, and addiction support specifically geared toward fathers and their families with the aim of reuniting families and providing them with the framework to thrive.

Donate to Fathers’ Uplift here.

National Fatherhood Initiative

The National Fatherhood Initiative is the country’s largest provider of research on the involvement of fathers and the impact fathers have on families. It provides communities with resources and training to increase father engagement with the goal of ensuring that communities and human service organizations have the tools and training they need to be father-inclusive so fathers can be more involved in the lives of their children.

Donate to the National Fatherhood Initiative here.

NAFFA

The Native American Fatherhood and Families Association is an Arizona-based nonprofit focusing on nourishing family relationships through its Fatherhood Is Sacred/Motherhood Is Sacred (FIS/MIS), Linking Generations by Strengthening Relationships, and Addressing Family Violence & Abuse programs. Employing culturally sensitive curricula and materials, NAFFA is able to address the specific concerns of the Native American community to reunite families and empower fathers to become family leaders.

Donate to the NAFFA here.

National Partnership for Women and Families

The National Partnership for Women and Families understands that families benefit when dads are present and actively engaged. One way the NPWF is creating a more equitable world for women is by spearheading programs, legislation, and calls to action that support fathers by promoting active fatherhood and gender equality.

Donate to the National Partnership for Women and Families here.

Promundo/Equimundo

Established in Brazil in 1997, Promundo has worked globally to engage fathers in the care economy, promote active fatherhood and promote gender equity and justice by engaging men and boys with women and girls. The organization is currently undergoing a rebranding to be more inclusive of all genders. Its new name, Equimundo: Center for Masculinities and Social Justice, “reflects our commitment to fostering gender equity and our roots in social justice. The name change also captures our approach of collaborating with and never overshadowing our diverse partners worldwide.”

Read more about Promundo/Equimundo here.

As a child, Kevin Hughes loved being part of a big family. One of four kids, he had tons of cousins. There were gigantic get-togethers and hours-long games of Ghost in the Graveyard. Hughes took it as writ that it was his job to look after his younger relatives and was comfortable babysitting by the time he hit middle school. He filed away information and ideas about how he intended to approach fatherhood in the future.

Today, Hughes, now 37, lives in Minneapolis with his wife and son, who will turn 1 this summer. He credits his upbringing for how comfortable he feels around his infant son. But even though he was about as prepared to be a dad as any man could reasonably be, Hughes admits the transition has been a shock to the system.

“You pass this threshold where there’s no going back,” says Hughes. “He’s always going to be around, and you can always be doing something as a parent to improve his existence.”

Parents have kids — everyone understands this. But that doesn’t mean everyone understands the nature of that experience. Few do prior to having it, and that number may be decreasing: Newly released Centers for Disease Control and Prevention data shows that United States birth rates are in a record slump, which doesn’t simply mean fewer babies. It means people are waiting and acclimating to a kid-free adult lifestyle.

The average age of first-time fatherhood has climbed steadily upward, from 27.4 years in 1972 to 30.9 in 2015, according to data released in 2017. That research also revealed that, during that same period, the number of first-time dads over 40 more than doubled, from 4.1% to 8.9%. This all means modern fathers have more time to contemplate what it might be like to be a father and less reason to take their expectations, informed by lifestyles that aren’t sustainable with children, seriously.

Even men like Kevin Hughes don’t know what’s coming until it hits them.

Accepted notions of paternal behavior have changed considerably since millennial fathers were millennial kids. Still, says Catherine Tamis-LeMonda, Ph.D., a professor of applied psychology at New York University, older ideas inform what men expect. The idea that men are obliged to be financial providers while women act as caregivers may be less accepted than it once was. But that doesn’t mean that monolithic notion, still common in mainstream representations of American families, doesn’t obscure men’s views of potential caregiving roles.

“We tend to have a narrative that raising a child is a mom’s domain, and moms do it better than dads,” says Tamis-LeMonda, adding that this is why it’s still not “cool,” societally speaking, for young men to think about wanting a family or talk about it. Not only are men’s views of themselves as potential nurturers blocked by cultural constructs, they’re also blocked by internalized ideas of masculinity.

Those ideas can also lead men astray even when they do make the effort to consider the sorts of parents they could become.

Before he became a father, Thomas Gonnella assumed he would have to become his family’s de-facto disciplinarian. He dreaded this development, which felt against his nature and inevitable. It never happened. Gonnella has two kids and a wife who doesn’t mind being “bad cop.”

“In our culture, we have ideas about what fathers do and what mothers do. Even though 99% of it overlaps, we think of it differently,” says Dante Spetter, Ph.D., a clinical child psychologist who teaches at Harvard on child and adolescent development and developmental psychopathology.

Spetter observes that both men and women enter parenting with unrealistic ideas about what it’s going to be like, in terms of the work it actually requires and how parenthood fits into the rest of life. “I think the unpredictability is the part of it that nobody anticipates, and when it comes to how to deal with that, moms and dads have different ideas,” she says.

Another fact of the expectation gap, Spetter explains, is that typically when people think about parenthood, they’re imagining little kids younger than 5. “They don’t think about a teenager. They think about a baby — nurturing is the part of parenting that people are thinking about. It’s not ‘how do you get someone dressed and into the car to daycare?’”

When Sean Sullivan, who has a 4-year-old, first became a dad, he remembers a process of figuring things out, but can’t recall spending time looking too far into the future. When his wife was pregnant, “I had not looked beyond the now-you-have-the-baby part,” Sullivan says. “Then it was like, all of a sudden, ‘What do I expect with this child?’ I just sort of thought it would be a lot of work and really busy. I didn’t really go into it with a lot of preconceived notions about what being a father would be like, other than the fact that I liked kids.”

Men sketch their concepts of fatherhood based on popular culture, perceived social norms, parenting manuals, peers, and even social media, explains Tamis-LeMonda. But approaches to parenthood are often forged in the molds — or against the molds — of an adult’s own parents.

“However fatherhood worked in their family and their own close community, that’s where they’re going to get their ideas,” says Spetter. As a clinician, she often hears men talk about how they want to be different from their own dads. Often, it comes down to: “When it comes to men thinking about being dads: What do they see at home?”

Rick Fordyce was 41 when he and his husband adopted their son in 2017. Raised by his grandparents in West Virginia, he grew up cooking with his grandmother and working in the garage with his grandfather, and knew he wanted to be a parent from a very young age.

“I don’t think society prepared me at all. If you look at TV from when I was growing up, the mom was the main character. As I thought about becoming a father, I never wanted there to be typical roles,” he says.

For Fordyce, developing his own style of fatherhood has meant letting go of preconceived notions about how he intended parent. “The part I wasn’t expecting as much was how I was willing to allow everything else to take a backseat: He takes priority always,” he says. “You compromise in relationships a lot. But there’s more compromising in being a dad that I had ever expected.”

One unanticipated point of compromise: co-parenting. Both Spetter and Tamis-LeMonda referenced the concept of gatekeeping, which among other behaviors describes mothers micromanaging dads. “Often what happens in a dynamic in a male/female couple is that the mom has very clear ideas about how things should be done — must be done — and if the father sees it differently, he’s either pressured to do it her way or pushed aside, not trusted,” says Spetter.

At 32, Jorian Arneson isn’t a dad, and he’s not sure he wants to be — mostly because of concerns about how parenthood would impact his marriage. Arneson and his wife have been together for 13 years, since college, and he cherishes their relationship the way it is. “Everything changes for some people when they have kids, because they can’t deal with the stress,” says Arneson. His fears are far from unfounded: Research shows that having kids irrevocably alters a relationship dynamic, as pillow talk is replaced by diaper-related discussions and kid-related everyday to-do lists.

On the other side of the threshold, Hughes also spoke about how fatherhood impacts his own marriage. One thing he didn’t think too much about prior to his son being born was how approaches of fatherhood, and motherhood, can collide. After witnessing peers struggle to get on the same page with parenting, from the “right” way to swaddle to the right moment to introduce solid foods, he feels fortunate to be in sync about those expectations. It wasn’t a given.

“I won the lottery,” says Hughes. “It’s so important to your experience how your partner deals with it individually, and how you deal with it as a team.”

Every parent has had an “ah-ha” moment, a time when suddenly and often inexplicably, clarity takes over and a realization sets in that helps you reframe who you are as a parent and person in general. Maybe you realized that you were being too serious and not silly enough with your kids. Maybe you realized that it’s much better — and simpler — to be honest with children about the long hours you work. Such moments can be as refreshing as they are eye-opening, reframing duties and elevating the concepts of compassion, understanding, presence, and making the most of every moment.

These moments of clarity are important. As important is sharing them so that fellow dads can learn the hard-won lessons a little bit sooner. That’s why we asked a group of men to share the realization that made them a better father. They shared stories of ah-ha moments both small and large that happened at charity book fairs and in classrooms. Each contains a bit of wisdom that fathers both young and old might learn a thing or two from.

1. I Realized I Didn’t Need To Keep Work and Family Separate

“I’ve always been a busy working professional, and I tried my best to make it work with my family. At one point, my son came to visit me at work, and I had a revelation that made me realize what kind of dad I wanted to be. I always tried to keep work and family separate, but this was the time I realized that it didn’t have to be that way. When my son visited, he was very curious about my work and would constantly ask questions. At one point, I realized how happy I was that he was there and was so curious about what I did.

From then on, I always used work discussions as a way to bond with my children and build a better relationship. They also respect my work more because of that, so they understand to keep away when things get too serious. It’s a relationship I wish for every working dad.” –Akram, United Arab Emirates

2. I Realized I Needed To Be More Involved

“My wake-up call to become a better father came through the passing of my own dad. I was constantly thinking I wish I’d been different, and spent more time appreciating him when he was alive. So I saw it as my chance to step up and become more involved in the lives of my children. We take the opportunity to get outdoors as often as possible. Fishing is my passion, and there have been trips when I feel the hairs on my arms stand up with the realization that I am pursuing the path of better parenthood. Sometimes it’s the little things that mean the most, like just expressing myself more often and being honest with my feelings. Hopefully, I’m teaching my children that life isn’t always smooth sailing and we all deal with failure in some aspect or another. In short, I want to use the passing of my father to benefit the life of my children, and I hope that my dad looks down on us with pride.” – Liam, 38, California

3. I Realized I Could Be More Present

“I’m the father of two, one boy, and one girl. I’ll never forget this certain moment of epiphany that prompted me not only to become a better father but a better individual. My youngest daughter was having her fifth birthday party. After we blew out the candles, she asked me if she would have a birthday every year. I said she would, and she asked, ‘Does that mean I’ll grow up like you?’ I said yes, she would, and she replied with, ‘Then that means you’ll grow up some more and get old like grandpa and grandma? But, Daddy, I want to be with you longer!’

From that moment, I realized how much longer I want to be with my children too. That single instance has prompted me to be more present every time we’re together. It has prompted me to try and maintain an active and healthy lifestyle, and to become a kinder and better parent and individual every chance I get.” –Johnny, 46, California

4. I Realized I Could Be The Serious And Silly Dad

“When I had my first son, I stopped ‘playing’ in order to be ‘serious’ about being an adult and a father. I gave up a lot of the things I loved to do, like water sports and traveling. I quickly became disgruntled and resentful. My son didn’t deserve that. He never asked me to give up my passions. But my whole family was suffering under my contempt, and I’m ashamed to say just how downtrodden and lost I became. The happy ending came when I realized that I could be myself and my son’s father at the same time. It sounds silly, but I thought I needed to choose one or the other. Really, my silliness and spirit were the levity my family needed most. Once I allowed myself these guilt-free rights, I held the responsibility of parenting closer to my heart. I returned to being the man I wanted to exemplify to my kids.” – Alex, 38, Utah

5. I Realized I Needed To Become An Advocate For My Child

“An individualized educational plan (IEP) meeting for my disabled daughter was how it was billed on paper. To this day, that meeting remains one of the most pivotal moments in my life as a parent. I had felt comfortable and competent as the parent of two children, the youngest autistic, the eldest not. Navigating the world with our daughter taught us to think differently about disability, acceptance, and community. ‘She does not qualify for special education,’ was all the administrator would say that day.

Despite the years of assessments and psychological batteries, the letter from her pediatrician and mountains of medical records, and most painfully, despite uncovering that the school had altered my daughter’s test scores to purposefully keep her from the access she required, her predetermined position would not change. On that day I was forced to become an advocate. Because on that day, I was painted as a difficult parent. Both labels put me on a path that challenged everything I knew about myself, and forced me to re-examine parenting.” – Aaron Wright, 46, California

6. I Realized I Had To Be A Better Example For My Daughters

“I was at a charity book sale and saw an old copy of Dr. Spock on Parenting by Dr. Benjamin Spock on sale for one dollar. I thought for a dollar, I couldn’t go wrong. It was the best parenting dollar I ever spent. As I read it, I could see why Dr. Spock’s book Baby and Child Care was one of the bestselling books of the 20th century. Ask any baby-boomer if their parents read Dr. Spock. They all did. In one of his chapters on being a father, he wrote that if you want to be a good father you have to be a role model to and a leader of your children.

The wisdom in that sentence hit me. I realized that I had to step forward and take the lead on dealing with situations involving my daughters. I had to be an example of the values I wanted my daughters to have. I had to be the kind of man I wanted my daughters to choose. It transformed me from being someone who was more of their mother’s helper to being their father.” – Elliot, 56, Toronto

7. I Realized I Needed To Start Reconsidering My Kids Views

“I have two teenagers, 15 and 17. For all of us, 2020 was a rough year all around ... because of the general state of everything. We had a conversation about all the things affecting the world and, in turn, their lives. I learned that my kids have a much different perspective about the world than I do. I have always led with a ‘my way or the highway’ philosophy, and being made aware of their perspectives made me realize I needed to take a step back and reassess.

They were scared about how rapidly the world was changing. And, honestly, I was too. After that initial discussion, we had many others. We really learned to communicate and be open with each other. This was such an extraordinary time for me as a dad. I was able to put my viewpoints on the back burner and listen to what they had to say about the world. The issues that are important to them are much clearer now, and important to me as well.” – Steve, 48, Arizona

8. I Realized I Didn’t Need to Hide Information About My Work

“Sometimes bringing home extra work or putting in longer hours is unavoidable, especially when you’re the boss. One day I stopped to talk to my kids and tell them exactly why I had to work so often and for so long this particular week, and I realized that was the key to both lessening my guilt and helping them understand why I’d be gone more than usual.

I started explaining to my kids why I’d have to bring work home or stay at the office longer, in simple terms they’d understand. I also made sure to always tell them it was just for a few days. Rather than try to hide it or ignore the fact that I was seeing them less, I gave them a reason why. They understand that when I have to work late it’s just temporary, and that’s made us all happier.” – Gabriel, North Carolina

9. I Realized How Fast The Years Were Passing By

“I think I realized how fast time was going by the day my youngest son graduated from elementary school. I began to see that time spent with my kids wasn’t something I could ever get back. I stopped worrying about work so much and tried to be more present and focused on my family. I used to always hear, ‘The days are long but the years fly by.’ When I watched my son graduate, it hit me that in eight years ,he would be gone from home forever. It really changed my perspective, and I devoted that last decade to being present. Not just physically, but invested in every minute with my kids and my family.” – Hugh, 48, Oregon

10. I Realized I Needed to Empathize More With My Kids

“One of the moments that made me a more understanding and focused parent was when I saw my son struggling with basic arithmetic. My son is an intelligent boy. But, it was heartbreaking to see how overwhelmed he got when math didn’t make sense to him. I realized I had to change my approach and look for more creative ways to teach him. We tried using his fingers and flashcards. He did well, but eventually became overwhelmed again.

It was heartbreaking. He looked so lost. So, we stopped, took a break, and I let him know, ‘It’s okay.’ Although some things can seem obvious to adults, it’s not fair to assume kids will get it right away. I’ve worked on empathizing more with my children. Sometimes it helps to put more effort into understanding where your child is coming from to help find the right strategy to help them out.” – Jonathan, 37, Nebraska

The following is an excerpt from Fatherhood: A Comprehensive Guide to Birth, Budgeting, Finding Flow, and Becoming a Happy Parent, Fatherly’s first parenting book from Harper Horizon, an imprint of Harper-Collins.

Your father knew nothing. Well, next to nothing — at least, next to nothing when it came to the likely effect he would have on you or your life. At most, when you were born, he had an inkling of what his presence and participation could offer. You inherited that same inkling. You’re considering it now, an undistinguished mass like an uncut diamond. Your sense is that you can make something priceless of it, but even the first cut requires a decision you might not be ready for. After all, you don’t know the first thing about diamond cutting.

Maybe your father loved you, maybe he didn’t. Whether he was present or absent, understanding or harsh, “good” or “bad” in your estimation, he was most likely unaware of what he held — because there was nobody to teach him to shape it.

Like others before him, he progressed through the experience of fatherhood, trying to refine the raw white stone and trying to make it shine. Someone just needed to help him find the correct angles.

Since 1950, the U.S. government has spent roughly $600 billion on NASA programs, nearly $10 billion collecting data on mothers, and the $15 million in change it found between the couch cushions went to research related to fatherhood. But the bulk of that research has been conducted in just the last decade. Which is all to say that humanity knows more about Alpha Centauri than we know about whether your old man f*cked you up.

Odd as it may sound, those initial dirty diapers become a gateway drug to care. You’ll want more. But only if you keep doing it.

Want to know what will happen to you in the moment that your child is born? Not much. As birth releases an oxytocin flood to your wife’s brain, overwhelming her with feelings of love so profound she ugly cries into low-thread-count hospital sheets, you may very well be tempted to check the Browns score (spoiler: they’re losing). You may feel this runs counter to the favored sentimental and celebrity narrative — “The first time I saw that face, my whole world changed!” — but birth experiences are as unique and varied as the men that have them. Instant love may be the story but it’s not necessarily the norm.

So, when does Mom pass Dad the oxytocin? When she passes the baby. Men only receive the biological benefits of dad-status when they start taking care of their kids. Odd as it may sound, those initial dirty diapers become a gateway drug to care. You’ll want more. But only if you keep doing it. And it goes on like that forever; kid and Dad passing the good feelings back and forth like a joint until, if all goes well, the former delivers the latter a heartfelt eulogy. But Dad has to start, because the kid’s hands are too small to roll one and because that’s the one thing that we absolutely know for sure, peer-review and all: whatever seriously good vibes are going to be, have to start with you.

Fatherhood: A Comprehensive Guide to Birth, Budgeting, Finding Flow, and Becoming a Happy Parent by Fatherly

While your father might have known nothing, he was particularly in the dark about the things he did know — which was actually a lot. He was pretty much parenting all the time. And surprise, surprise, most of the time, he was probably doing fine. Roughhousing was parenting; watching television with you was parenting; talking to your mother at the dinner table was parenting. Fatherhood is only a state of being in that it’s the act of being who you are. Because the fact is that the person you are before you have a kid will not be appreciably different than the person you are after you have a kid. And that person is the template your kid will use to learn how to live in the world. So becoming a good father is about knowing yourself, and leveraging all that’s good in you towards raising someone who knows better than you. That’s love.

But love isn’t always easy, and loving as a parent can be even harder. It’s easy for the bad times (and there will be bad times) to eclipse the wonder that is raising another human. It’s not for nothing that some dads go out for a pack of cigarettes and decide not to come back. Some men let the hard times lie to them. Some men fall into the trap of thinking parenthood will always be tough and they will never be tougher.

Don’t sweat what you don’t know, because if you know yourself, you know fatherhood.

You get maybe 18 good years to lean into being a truly active and effective father. If you’re lucky, your relationship with your kid will continue to bloom into their adulthood and your own old age. If you’re really lucky, you get to see how they turned out.

Those 18 years, though. They go by fast. And if you get lost in the tough times you miss the profound beauty of your kid becoming a person. You’ll look up one day and there will be a man or a woman standing in front of you and you’ll think, “What the hell just happened?”

That inkling that you have? That inkling that your father had? There’s no great secret in turning it into fatherly knowledge. All you have to do is be present. All you have to do is stop sometimes and observe a supposedly mundane moment. Because none of them are truly mundane — each one contains a look exchanged, a moment of communication, or a physical touch that is laying the foundation for your child’s personhood.

This book is about helping you create, recognize, and acknowledge those moments. And the fact that your holding it in your hands is a damn good sign that you’re on the right track. Don’t sweat what you don’t know, because if you know yourself, you know fatherhood.

You don’t go to Disney World to unplug. If you need to turn your mind off and get away from all responsibilities, head to a sandy shore and unfold your beach chair. But if you want to be entertained and surprised, thrilled and fed, to build more cinematic vacation memories for the whole family — then by all means, book a ticket to Orlando.

But, and you probably know this, you’re going to need to do some work. You need to get fluent in the language of Disney World — a bureaucratic tongue laid out in the My Disney Experience app and Genie+ systems, and Disney.go.com. You also need to have a plan, an itinerary, and it should probably be marked on a map. You need to treat Disney World with the respect that the 39-square-mile amusement park with 173 rides, more than 200 restaurants, and 77,000 cast members that draw roughly 160,000 guests a day deserves.

Let’s be clear: The folks at Disney World will give your kids a wildly entertaining experience. That’s pretty much a given. But to get the most out of it — and you do want to get the most out of it after you’ve dropped $200-plus per person per day on average — you should talk to those who have been there. Better yet, those who live for Disney and have been there over and over. To offer some well-informed Disney World tips, tricks, and hacks, we talked to the bona fide Disney experts — mostly dads because, hey, we’re Fatherly — as well as experienced parents who’ve learned a thing or two about what really makes a memorable trip to the Magic Kingdom. Here they are in no particular order. We hope they help.

Prioritization Is Key

You won’t be able to do everything, and you’ll want to leave room for those impromptu memories that just sort of happen at Disney World. So, before you arrive, have everyone choose one or two attractions they’re looking forward to the most, and make sure to do those things. The rest is all bonus.

Arrive Early

Veterans call this getting there by “rope drop,” which simply means arriving when the park opens. Whichever way you say it, the early hours are cooler and, likely, less crowded.

The Midday Break Is A Must

This is the key to a meltdown-free time. Memorize this schedule: Be at the park by “rope drop.” Leave by 11 to noon. Get some food. Put the kids down for a nap. Hang in the pool. Relax. Return in the late afternoon around 4 or 5 for more attractions and the fireworks display.

Stretch Every Morning

There’s a lot of walking and standing and kid-carrying involved in a Disney trip. Don’t go in cold.

Wear The Right Shoes

Don’t wear new ones. Break them in first. And don’t wear old crappy sneakers, either. You’ll likely be walking upward of 10 miles each day. Bring two pairs of comfortable sneakers and rotate them.

Work In Reverse

That is, start at the back of the park and move toward the front. Yes, it’s a bit of a hike. But you’ll be able to experience less crowded attractions earlier in the day (most parkgoers will hit the closest rides first) and be closer to the entrance by the time you’re ready to leave.

Go Left

Here’s another early day decision-making tip: When you come to a fork in the road, go left. We live in a right-handed world, so if you want to avoid some crowds, all you need to do is head left at all your forks in the road in the beginning of the day. It works — and makes for one less decision on your part.

Buy The Bucket

“Disney’s popcorn bucket is the deal of the century. The bucket is a great collectible, and it’s such an easy snack. Also, it’s very inexpensive to fill the bucket ($2 per refill) and it’s better than your local theater popcorn.” — Jeremy Acevedo, a PlanDisney expert and dad of three kids aged 17, 14, and 11

Spring For Genie+

The service, which is baked into the My Disney Experience app, allows you to reserve times at certain attractions and gives you the option to purchase Lightning Lane reservations for up to two in-demand rides per day. It’s worth it.

Make Use Of The Park’s Transportation

The monorails, boats, and gondolas are all fun ways to traverse the park — and give you and the kids some much-needed time off your feet.

Rent A Stroller

Even if your kids are a little too big for it, think of it as a mobile command unit where all your stuff can be stored.

Resist The Urge To Wake

If your kid is sleeping in the stroller, don’t wake them up to see something at the park. Yes, it’s probably something they’d like to see. But they can see it later. Let them rest.

Get A Dole Whip

Just do it. Some things are worth the hype, and the famous frozen treat is one of them. It comes in other flavors besides pineapple, sure, but pineapple is still the best.

Keep Your Eye On The Prize

“The first and probably most important thing is we all know about the Disney fireworks. This is the momentous occasion that will stick with you your entire life. You want to stay up for that. So take a midday break. And don’t mess with their sleep schedule.” — J.A.

Seek These Snacks

Disney World offers some seriously great snacks. Searching for something sweet? Scat Cat’s Club Café’s Mickey beignets are fantastic. And no one does a Warm Cinnamon Roll quite like Gaston’s Tavern. In terms of savory snacks, Flame Tree Barbecue’s Baked Macaroni & Cheese With Pulled Pork is a winner, as is the Sweet & Spicy Chicken Waffle Sandwich at Sleepy Hollow.

Chat With Cast Members

Pretty much anyone who works at Disney is technically a cast member, and whether they’re costumed characters or vendors, they all have interesting tips and advice for park visitors.

Fight The Funk

Florida is humid. In the summer, it can feel like you’re trapped in a mouth. Prepare yourself by wearing sweat-wicking underwear and socks and investing in some talcum powder.

Pack These Items

No, these aren’t necessities, but they’ll make your time in the park a lot smoother: a collapsible stool (to sit while waiting on long lines); a small, packable blanket (for sitting on while watching parades and fireworks); carabiners or hooks (for attaching things to your stroller or backpack like a souvenir or, oh, a big popcorn bucket); and a spray bottle (to mist the kids and yourselves).

Split Up

“You can split up. In fact, do split up if your kids are different ages or just like different things. There are usually rides right next to each other. For example, Buzz Lightyear (which is slow) is next to Tron (which is fast, and dark). And at the same time, you’ll get one-on-one time. My son didn’t want to see Anna and Elsa, so my wife took my daughters and we went on Winnie the Pooh. Nobody lost time. And we gained that one-on-one time.” — J.A.

Rely On Rider Switch

The Rider Switch program, which is available at certain rides and coordinated through cast members, allows one adult to wait with a child who doesn’t want to ride while the other family members ride. Once the other family members have ridden, the waiting parent can enjoy the attraction without having to wait in line again.

Eat These Foods At Epcot

The best food in the park, hands down, is at Epcot, where there are cuisines from 11 countries. Some highlights include the Norwegian School Bread at Kringla Bakeri Og Kafe, the Japanese Shaved Ice at Kabuki Cafe, the Caramel S’mores at Karamell Kuche, and the Nutella Fried Beignets at Les Halles Boulangerie-Patisserie.

Toss The Ball

“I like to bring a ball, gloves, a Frisbee… something along those lines to enjoy in the resort. I remember throwing the football outside Disney’s Polynesian. It was an amazing experience that the kids will remember. And you can take that football back home and say ‘Remember when...” — Jason Kaplan, a PlanDisney expert and dad of two sons, 20 and 16

Don’t Mess With Routines Too Much

Yeah, some things will be out of whack because that’s what happens on vacation. But if your kid normally naps in the afternoon, do what you can to ensure they have that opportunity. This will make things much smoother — and prevent the post-vacation nightmare of having to reintroduce schedules.

The Baby Care Centers Are Your Friends

“If your toddler needs a break, take them to a baby care center, a place where all the sensory stuff goes away. It’s the quiet space that you sometimes need.” — J.A.

Snap A Morning Photo

Do it for the memories, before the kids become a sweaty mess. But also do it because it’s helpful to have an up-to-date photo to show if your kids ever get lost.

Bring Plenty Of Plastic Baggies

Use them to hold your phone and wallet when you’re on water rides, store leftovers, and make security checks easier.

Embrace Mobile Food Ordering

It’ll save you a ton of time. Everyone can choose what they want while you’re waiting in line, and then you just go pick it up after you get off a ride. This is all done through the My Disney Experience app, which also displays the closest restaurants to you.

Bring Layers

“A lightweight jacket is super helpful. Also bring a pair of jeans, sweatpants, a sweatshirt. Use compression bags, squeeze it all together, and leave some room. If it’s your first or 50th trip, you’ll buy something. Oh, and lay it out in the morning.” — J.K.

Sunscreen. Sunscreen. Sunscreen.

You don’t want to ruin a trip to Disney World due to sunburn — that’s a mistake to make at the beach. So put on sunscreen and have everyone wear full-coverage hats. Set a timer on your phone to remind yourself to reapply.

Keep A Full Cup Of Ice

Every food location at Disney World will give you a free cup of ice water if you ask for it. Great for thirst. Also great for wetting a cooling towel.

The Cooling Towel Is Clutch

Be sure to pack one. Or four. A great option is the Frogg Toggs Chilly Pad. It retains water while staying dry to the touch and cool for hours. (evaporative cooling FTW). It’s also UPF 50+.

Bottle Your Back

Stack any insulated bottles with ice water in the body-facing side of your backpack to keep your back nice and cool as you walk through the park carrying the kids. Heaven.

Make Use of the Lockers

“There are lockers at the front of the park, and you can always go back to them. There’s only so much you should be carrying around.” — J.K.

Get Excited!

Build up the excitement while you’re in line. Freak out if you see a character you know the kids will love. Hype up the fireworks display. Anticipation makes for bigger thrills.

Ride The Disney Railroad

When your energy starts to fade, the Disney Railroad (20 minutes, round-trip) is a great “ride” for the kids that also gets you off your feet. The Skyliner, a free cable car, is another way to ‘sit and enjoy the view’ as you travel between Epcot, Disney’s Art of Animation Resort, Disney’s Caribbean Beach Resort, Disney’s Pop Century Resort, Disney's Riviera Resort, and Hollywood Studios (and back again if you’re just along for the ride or the kids are snoring).

Plan the Action Upfront

“Most folks go to Disney for about a week. So, you’re there five days, six nights with four to five days of park tickets. That’s pushing it to the limit if you think you’re going every day and spending every moment in the park. You’re going to be tired. Instead, put your back-to-back days at the beginning. Then relax.” — J.A.

Find These Fireworks Viewing Locations

The fireworks are a must-see event during any visit to Disney World. But the main viewing areas can be very crowded, and especially tricky if you’re maneuvering a stroller, and require getting there a few hours ahead of time. For a less packed experience, head over to It’s A Small World, the walkway near Tomorrowland, or Town Square, the latter of which’s entrance-adjacent location makes it easy to exit.

Avoid The Post-Fireworks Monorail

It’s usually a chaotic traffic jam. You’ve been warned.

Bring Spare Clothes

Wet swimsuits chafe. Spills happen. Come prepared.

How To Skip The Fireworks

Don’t care about the fireworks display or you’ve already seen it? The best time to ride your favorite Magic Kingdom rides is during the show. The lines are much shorter, and the park is beautiful at night when the crowds are taking in the explosions.

Remember That Kids Have Limits

Yes, the trip was expensive, and yes, there’s a lot to see and you want to get your money’s worth. It’s easy to push them into overdrive for the pursuit of memory-making. Don’t do that. Hydrate. Snack. Sit when it’s time to sit.

Freeze Some Drink Pouches

They’re a great thing to have during the heat of the day.

Find The Attractions That Make Everyone Excited

“We try to look at what attractions would split the kids apart and try to find the adjacent attraction. Whether it’s a simple boat ride… or Space Mountain… there’s something for everyone there.

But the real cool part is that they’re going to want to go on these rides and sit with each other. So, you start building these sibling bonds and that’s a real win for the parents.” — J.K.

Air Tag Your Stroller

This will ensure it doesn’t get lost in a sea of similar buggies when you park it before a ride. At the very least, tie a few bright ribbons or mark it with some other form of flair to it to ensure its easily identifiable.

Bring A Backup Battery

Scratch that — bring three. All the photo-taking, map-searching, and app-swiping quickly drains a phone. The park sells Fuel Rods, and you can exchange a depleted one at the kiosks for a fully charged replacement, which is nice. But bring whatever you want. You don’t want to be caught with a dead phone.

Pack A Cooler

FWIW and per park rules, guests can bring outside food and beverage items into the park “provided they are not in glass containers and do not require heating, reheating, processing, refrigeration, or temperature control and do not have pungent odors.”

Get Dusted

In Fantasyland, there’s a shop named Sir Mickey’s where you can ask any cast member about being “Pixie Dusted.” They will sprinkle you with pixie dust from a special wand. It’s fun. Just prepare to find glitter on your kids for the next several days.

Watch Before You Ride

Especially if you have little ones, give them a glimpse of the attraction first (it’s an entire genre on YouTube) or have a real-life look. If they’re scared of watching it, chances are they’ll be scared riding it.

Double Check Ride Requirements

You can do so here. The last thing you want is for your kid to get psyched up about an attraction to realize that they’re not tall enough to ride. Measure your kids before the trip

Your Pool Is The Single Most Important Attraction

“The pool is one of those places to decompress. Embrace it. I was there with my son last month, and we had so much fun at the Swan & Dolphin pool (‘The Grotto’ pool). We even went for a midday break. Kids will nap on those lounge chairs if they need it, and each of the pools has its quirks — like zero entry so you can walk in to their ankles. If your family likes pools, you might want to look to the pool first.” — J.A.

Prepare For Long Waits

No matter how much work you do to game the system, you’ll spend a lot of time standing in line. Don’t be surprised. Download plenty of kid-friendly games on your phone. Pack bubbles or other fun distractions. Have plenty of snacks and water.

Keep An Eye Out For Hidden Mickeys

Throughout the park, in different sizes and on everything from lampshades to sidewalks to murals, are a variety of hidden images of the House of Mouse’s mascot snuck into the designs. It makes for a fun scavenger hunt.

Go On An Official Scavenger Hunt

Speaking of scavenger hunts, in seven countries in Epcot, there are hidden animatronics everywhere. To unlock them, get the Play Disney Parks app and open DuckTales World Showcase Adventure. Solve the clues, and gather ’round for the big reveals — which in some instances are impressive enough to gather crowds who will wonder “How did they do that?”

Go Go Go And You’ll Be Gone

“You really want to manage your expectations and your emotional display to the children. You’ve invested money to have a magical vacation. But remember, Disney World is going to be there for a long time. So read your child and understand that when it’s snack time, sit down and have a snack… Focus on enjoying the process.” — J.K.

Savor the Small Moments

It’s easy to want to rush through the park and see and do as much as possible. And while yes, you should prioritize some memories, rushing will lead to frustrations and meltdowns. Instead, enjoy the journey. Slow down. Disney parks have amazing ambiance, and the most memorable moments — an impromptu performance, a character-driven surprise — often appear out of nowhere.

On Thursday, May 27, 2021, Fatherly’s co-founder, Mike Rothman, testified to the House Ways & Means Committee on the importance of, and the urgency for Congress to pass, federal family and medical leave.

As a company, Fatherly was born out of the acknowledgment that dads have been underserved in traditional media and haven’t been recognized for their changing role as caregivers and, at times, primary parents.

Fatherly’s mission is to empower men to raise great kids and lead more fulfilling lives. We do this, primarily, through journalism, offering expert-driven resources for dads on everything from public policy to developmental milestones to how to talk to teachers to the best games for kids and how to divide labor fairly in a relationship.

To that end, advocating for gender-neutral, inclusive, federal paid family and medical leave has been a part of the mission editorially since nearly day one. From deep interviews to investigative reports and our Best Places to Work guides, Fatherly has focused on federal paid leave — and the vast importance it has to dads, moms, daughters, sons, and siblings. It has become one of the linchpins of our public policy coverage.

As a result of this focus on paid leave as well as his own experience running a small business, Mike Rothman will testify to the House Ways and Means Committee about the importance and necessity of passing a federal paid leave plan in the United States.

Why push for paid leave? For one, nearly every other developed and wealthy country in the world has some form of paid leave from 2 to 21 months. In fact, the United States stands alone in how little it provides to working parents, and how much it expects from them in return.

Here are five other reasons we’re testifying.

• Because paid leave is good for companies, and it’s been good for ours. Dozens of studies have found that paid family and medical leave reduce worker turnover, has no adverse effect, or even a positive effect, on productivity, and increases or has no adverse effect on company morale. Before we enacted our paid leave policies, Fatherly missed out on great, mid-career level talent that went elsewhere for said benefits — harming our growth in the process. 90 percent of businesses in California under the state’s paid leave plan said that the program increased worker productivity, and 99 percent of companies surveyed said that the program had positive, or neutral, effects on employee morale, according to the National Partnership for Working Families.

• Because paid leave is good for workers, and work. Studies have found, time and time again, that paid leave access increases relationship happiness, parental bonding, decreases stress, and leads to better health outcomes. It lessens burnout. All of these things are good for workers, but they’re also good for the companies people work for. Of dozens of studies that Richard J. Petts has done on the subject, he’s found that paternity and parental leave leads to happier marriages, decreased risk of divorce, and stronger bonds with children.

• Because it’s one thing for Fatherly to report on the importance of paid leave; but rather importantly, we are strong advocates within the company for it. While Fatherly’s editorial output has long focused on the importance of paid leave, it took a bit of time before we began to advocate for, and push, gender-neutral, generous paid parental leave within the company. Now we offer four months of gender-neutral parental leave, a best-in-class offering for paid leave, like that offered at places like Deloitte, a massive international company. The Department of Labor reports that only 15 percent of companies with 99 or fewer employees have access to paid leave, much fewer people than those who work at big companies. A federal paid leave plan shouldn’t be something you get only if you work at a massive corporation.

• Because offering paid leave is great. But that’s just one part of the battle. It is simply not enough to offer paid leave and never bring it up again. Studies from folks like Dr. Jennifer Berdahl have shown that toxic work culture, and work culture that values long hours, after-work obligations, and limitless time for work devalue parents and also make it harder for them to feel empowered to take the leave they are offered through company benefits. Fatherly is advocating for a families-first company culture where managers visibly take and encourage employees to take, the full suite of the benefits offered to them. Flexibility has to be modeled in order for it to actually exist.

• And because small businesses, and parents, both overwhelmingly want paid leave to happen. In March of 2021, nearly 200 small and large businesses sent an open letter to Congress urging them to pass paid leave. Small businesses are overwhelmingly urging congress to provide federal paid leave to their employees. Parents, too, on a bipartisan basis, want to have access to paid parental and medical leave.

Ultimately, the fight for paid leave can’t stop at good companies doing the right thing. Because for as long as that happens, only those with salaries and full-time jobs will have access to an essential benefit offered around the world, and having access to this essential benefit will make workers subject to what they do.

Universal paid parental leave would be a massive step forward for workers, employers, and families in the United States. It’s time.

The state of parental leave in the U.S. is dismal. This, we know. And, often, that conversation can become a bit of a downer.

If you’d prefer to talk about paternity leave from an empirical perspective, rather than an abstractly depressing one, then you will relish the work of Brad Harrington, director of Boston College’s Center for Work and Family. Harrington has spent the better part of the last decade authoring a number of illuminating studies that have quantified just how bad of a job our society is doing in helping new dads connect with their babies. His work is useful and important, serving to illuminate the desire many fathers have to be a part of their family, why they feel forced into certain roles, and that, while the legislative hurdles we must leap over, while high, lead to a better place. Here are some of Harrington’s largest points.

READ MORE: The Fatherly Guide to Parental and Paternity Leave

Dads Want to Be More Involved Than Society Allows

In one of their studies, Harrington and his team asked about 1,000 dads how they viewed their role at home, on a continuum from breadwinner to caregiver. “You heard from fathers that they wanted to be more engaged than their own fathers were,” he said. Nearly three-quarters said they saw themselves as equal parts both. “That was a more balanced view than we expected. We thought fathers would have a bias toward breadwinning,” he says. But their actual role at home doesn’t quite fit that ideal: Even though two-thirds of guys said they want to split caregiving 50-50 with their partner, only about one in three guys reported duties were in fact split. The remaining majority said that they carried out considerably less than half of the caregiving. “The disconnect in what they wanted to do and what they did was big.”

Paternity Leave Is Essential For Building Engaged, Confident Fathers

In his research, Harrington has found that only about 75 percent of dads take as much as a week off for paternity leave (and that a vanishingly small number take more than two weeks, and a depressing 15 percent go back to work the next day). Unfortunately, the dearth of paternity leave time has ramifications that can last a lifetime. “They’re not really experiencing caregiving in any meaningful way in those few days, and not understanding how to care for a kid solo,” Harrington says. These short moments fathers spend with kids at the early stage of their kids’ lives aren’t enough to build confidence in their parenting ability. And it’s time they can never get back. “It’s unlikely the father will ever be a true equal, and that pattern has a reinforcing effect: The more a mother cares for a kid, the more she feels able to do. The less a father feels able, the more he steps back.” (Editor’s Note: Harrington’s study population has been college-educated men in white collar jobs, so they may actually have better access to paid paternity leave than other populations, making the outlook even worse for a broad swath of Americans.)

Paternity Leave Is On Everyone’s Mind

In 2014, Harrington focused his efforts on trying to find out what men wanted and expected from paternity leave. “We were trying to find out men’s perceptions,” he said. Posing the question to more than 1,000 fathers who had at least one child under the age of 18, he asked how important paid paternity leave would be if they were looking for a new job. Nearly 90 percent of the surveyed fathers said that leave was somewhat, very or extremely important to very important on their personal radar, with 60 percent of those men falling in the very or extremely category. In terms of pay, around 85 percent said they’d have to get 70 percent of their full pay to take the leave. “Their ideal was two to four weeks off,” Harrington said. He points out that their sample population was biased because, sadly, these guys were among the small minority across the country who had access to some paid paternity leave, however short.

Dads Should Learn Something from the Women’s Movement

Women have always had a place in the home, but have had to struggle for it in the workplace, Harrington points out. Men are in the opposite position. Feminism didn’t happen overnight, but if men want to be heard about paternity leave, they might have to learn something from that and get louder. “There was a powerful coalition that marshaled their clout to make sure it happened,” Harrington says. “I don’t see a parallel activity going on. There’s no Gloria Steinem of the men at home movement.” Harrington hasn’t seen leaders strong and charismatic enough on the issue to stoke anything more than lukewarm attention. “Women are filling traditionally male-oriented roles, but men aren’t doing the reverse.”

There Won’t Be A Tipping Point Anytime Soon

“A stronger national policy would be grea,t but I don’t see that happening,” Harrington says. Instead, he thinks states, municipalities, and forward-thinking companies will continue to add incrementally to paid paternity leave. “At some point, there will be a tipping point, but we’re not there yet.” And until then, he says, it’s not just fathers and children who bear consequences. “Employers need to step up and say if we want to see women advance, then we need to encourage men to take leave or give flexible work arrangements.”

The time immediately after birth or adoption is a crucial one for parents and children, and because of that, most countries across the world provide some form of paid prenatal leave, parental leave, or federal paid family leave for their citizens. But not us.

The United States stands alone in being the sole nation in the OECD that guarantees exactly zero federal paid parental leave to its citizens. And despite the best efforts of some federal lawmakers, it’s been those in just a few states who’ve actually been successful in giving more people what should be a universal benefit.

Here’s what you need to know about the state of parental leave in the U.S., from the inadequate law on the federal books to the places that are stepping up to help new parents.

What does federal law say about family leave?

There is one federal leave law on the books. The Family and Medical Leave Act, passed in 1993, guarantees “eligible employees of covered employers to take unpaid, job-protected leave for specific family and medical reasons with continuation of group health insurance coverage under the same terms and conditions as if the employee had not taken leave.” Those reasons include birth, adoption, and foster placement of a new child.

“Covered employers” are employers that are either public agencies (at any level of government), K-12 schools (public or private), or private-sector employers who employed 50 or more people in 20 or more workweeks. That’s a complicated way of saying that smaller businesses—a favorite buzzword of certain political actors—don’t have to let their employees take time off when they have a kid.

“Eligible employees” are those who have had their job for at least 12 months and worked for at least 1,250 hours in the previous year at a location where the employer has at least 50 employees within 75 miles can claim leave under FMLA.

It matters a lot that the leave provided for by the FMLA is unpaid. For working-class families, the job-protected leave is nice, but it can’t be taken because, well, people can’t afford to not get paid.

All it means is that you can’t lose your job or your employer-provided health insurance while you’re out. Taking the full 12 weeks means giving up 12 weeks of pay, nearly a quarter of one’s annual wages. It’s practically impossible for working people to do that, further limiting the number of people who can take advantage of the time.

The refusal to allocate substantial funding and linguistic knot-twisting in the bill reveals why the FMLA is so inadequate. When the vast majority of people can’t afford to take the leave offered on a federal basis, even if they qualify under the stipulations, it’s not really a law that helps people.

How many states provided more unpaid leave?

Twenty-one states, the District of Columbia, and Puerto Rico have extended unpaid leave beyond the limitations imposed by the FMLA, according to HR software company Paycor. Here are a few examples:

• In Iowa, companies with four or more employees must offer eight weeks of unpaid leave regardless of how long an employee has worked there.
• In Maine, companies with 15 or more employees have to offer ten weeks of unpaid leave to their employees.
• In Montana, all female employees are entitled to a “reasonable leave of absence for pregnancy.”

In all of the states that have only extended more unpaid leave to their citizens, the problem of people being unable to afford to take time off remains. That’s why the real MVPs are the state legislators who’ve managed to get paid parental leave passed into law.

Which states have paid parental leave?

A handful of state and local governments have stepped up to ensure that new parents within their confines receive this rather obvious benefit, and as time passes, barring a federal leave policy being passed under the Biden Administration, you should expect more states to step up to the plate and offer the benefit.

California, Rhode Island, New York, New Jersey, Washington, Massachusetts, Connecticut, Oregon, Colorado, the District of Columbia, and Puerto Rico all guarantee parents leave within one year of birth or adoption placement for some amount of time at some income level. The particulars in each state vary—notably, Puerto Rico’s benefit only applies to moms for four weeks before birth and four weeks after—but in all, there’s some kind of program to avoid forcing new parents who spend precious time with their kids to miss out on the income that makes it possible to take care of your family financially.

As of 2020, new parents in Washington state can take up to 16 weeks of paid leave to stay home with their child. The new policy will go into effect starting January 1, 2020, making Washington one of only four states in the U.S. that currently offer paid family leave.

“It’s a benefit for the people who could take the leave, but it’s also a benefit for employers,” Carla Reyes, the director of the state’s paid family and medical leave, told The Seattle Times. “We’re hoping it will help people recover faster and return to work faster.”

Through the state’s Paid Family and Medical Leave program, which was implemented in 2018, individuals will be able to take 12 weeks of paid leave after the birth of their child, while couples will be able to take a combined 16 weeks. Additionally, any parent diagnosed with pregnancy complications will be eligible for up to 18 weeks.

To qualify for the benefits, which will be paid as a percentage of wages up to $1,000, the parent must have worked 820 hours in the last year. The employee can be full-time, part-time, or even self-employed and can have worked for either one or multiple employers. If eligible, the average person will contribute about $2 per week to their leave fund.

Washington’s new initiative is part of a larger push for better parental leave policies in the U.S., which is the only developed country without guaranteed paid parental leave. Currently, California, New York, New Jersey, and Rhode Island are the only states with a paid leave program, while plans in the District of Columbia and Massachusetts are set to roll out in the next few years.

Many hope that Washington’s recent decision to offer paid leave will set a precedent for more states to follow suit.

A dad’s relationship to employment is so fraught that here at Fatherly, we made it the subject of the first chapter in Fatherly’s new book Fatherhood: A Comprehensive Guide to Birth, Budgeting, Finding Flow, and Becoming a Happy Parent (available for pre-order now). It’s clear that the occupational hazard of being a father is established from the get-go. Men simply aren’t offered paternity leave. Fathers are largely reliant on a patchwork of state laws that may or may not allow them paid time at home in the first weeks of their child’s life. Only five states currently mandate paid parental leave. New York State, California, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Washington State, and Washington, DC, now have laws in place requiring employers to provide paid leave to employees. Leave amounts run from four to twelve weeks and cover anywhere from 60 to 90 percent of wages, depending on the hours a parent works.

Any other leave a parent might receive comes at the discretion of an employer. The best businesses recognize the benefit of allowing family time to establish long-term care patterns and bonding. They’ll offer three months of leave to both parents. The worst companies allow paltry leave or offer it only to mothers.

Some men are taking action. Financial giant JP Morgan was stung by such terrible policies back in 2021. The Fortune 500 company paid out a $5 million settlement after a civil rights lawsuit was brought on behalf of a father denied paternity leave because he was not considered a primary caregiver.

The thing is, aggressive action like civil rights lawsuits is exactly the kind of thing that will change policies and normalize fathers taking leave. It just seems that fathers either don’t have the balls to push companies to make changes, or they are waiting for women to take the lead.

Unfortunately, I feel I need to pause here to address the fact I’m taking the benefits of leave for fathers as a given. But, such is our world. You’d have to be a hapless dummy or a recalcitrant edgelord to believe that: a) a father spending more time with a child in infancy has no benefits for either kid or father or b) that there’s nothing for a dad to do when a child is a newborn. It should be obvious that establishing patterns of nurturing and care in infancy pays dividends for future development. And it’s borderline misogynistic to be so completely blind to the unpaid labor women perform in the home, from the outset, that you think the only thing they’re doing during leave is “breastfeeding.”

Regressive ideas about a father’s role in the first months of a child’s life drive the status quo. But they persist because men have allowed them to persist. Paternal leave is a men’s issue and driving change to make it both universal and expected is a task that men should lead. I shouldn’t be the Lys Lenzs of the world pressuring men to take leave; it should be our male colleagues and male business thought leaders.

One of the better traits of masculinity is the desire to both lead and protect. We have an opportunity to do both of those things when it comes to improving parental leave. It is not the job of feminists to tell men what to do or to lead men on the charge. In fact, waiting for women to tell us what to do has made their lives so much more complicated. Men shouldn’t have to be told it’s time to wash a dish or change a load of laundry as much as they shouldn’t be told how to agitate for change.

And it’s men’s unique failure to lead that allows inequality in employment issues like paid leave, or even equal pay and advancement, to fester in our workplaces. You have got to believe that paternal leave would be universal if America’s corporations felt that not having it would cause them to lose the faith and labor of men. There’s more than a little irony in being told you’re the “stronger” sex and then sitting on that strength to the detriment of our children and families.

Lenz is correct. More men need to take more leave for their families. But in order for that to happen, there needs to be leave available. And it won’t be available until men make it a point to demand recognition of their own equality in caregiving.

In the early afternoon hours of Thursday, May 27, 2021, Fatherly’s co-founder, Mike Rothman, testified to the House Ways & Means Committee in support of a fully inclusive, gender-neutral, paid, federal family and medical leave program.

It was a big moment for Fatherly — but more importantly, for workers and families. Fatherly’s mission statement is to provide dads, who are traditionally underserved in mainstream media, with the expert guidance, resources, and sounding board that they need to thrive as active caregivers and at times primary parents.

And part of that expert guidance has been the continued reporting on the importance of federal paid leave. Federal paid leave, and paid leave in general, is good for big businesses, small businesses, good for families, and good for employees themselves. It’s good for relationships with children and with spouses, and it’s practically irrational that the United States stands alone in wealthy nations in not providing even several weeks of it to its workforce, despite the noted public health, economic, and personal benefits.

Below is our written testimony.

COMMITTEE ON WAYS AND MEANS

WORKER FAMILY SUPPORT SUBCOMMITTEE LEGISLATIVE HEARING ON UNIVERSAL PAID FAMILY LEAVE AND GUARANTEED ACCESS TO CHILD CARE TESTIMONY OF MICHAEL ROTHMAN CO-FOUNDER, FATHERLY

My name is Michael Rothman and I’m the co-founder and CEO of Fatherly, a digital media platform with a mission to empower men to raise great kids and lead more fulfilling adult lives. We launched in 2015 and produce an award-winning website, newsletters, podcast programming, books, and events. I am testifying today in my capacity as the founder of a small business and an advocate for fathers. Fatherly is a for-profit business and I started the company because as an entrepreneur I saw an emerging opportunity, namely that men were assuming greater responsibilities for childcare and didn’t have a resource that could credibly guide them in this new phase of life.

While there was an abundance of resources for moms, the only content tailored to men caricatured their roles and failed to recognize how deeply their responsibility as fathers benefitted children and defined their identity in both their public and private lives. At its core, Fatherly understands that in an economy in which both parents are working, empowering men as caregivers is crucial. By giving them the tools and community, we aim to help remove cultural stigmas around caregiving work.This past year has put this issue front and center, showing the nation to see just how crucial equal parental participation is. According to the National Partnership for Women & Families, more than 65 million women in the United States provided unpaid child, family, and elder care in 2020; more than half of these women were mothers of children under 18. As the pandemic began to put pressure on their families, millions of women reduced their hours or left the workforce entirely in order to engage in unpaid caregiving; more than $416.3 billion worth of unpaid caregiving if those women were paid at the federal minimum wage rate.

This trend has pushed more women out of the workforce partially due to the stigma around the division of labor in families and workplaces that often keeps men from participating fully in caregiving.That stigma is very real. In Fatherly’s reporting on paid leave, the editors spoke to many people like Jacob Simon. A Boston-based bankruptcy lawyer, Simon told us he didn’t take his leave because he felt pressure from his employer not to — but he was also quick to acknowledge that the pressure to get back into the office was internal, as well. He had mixed feelings about his perceived absenteeism. When he and his wife had their first child, he was 36 years old and working at a six-person firm. He wasn’t salaried, so if he didn’t work, he didn’t get paid. He took a week off, but called into meetings.He expressed his attitude that there was an honor in showing up. “If I’m not there, I’d have failed somehow,” he said he remembered thinking. Thinking back on it, he says that if he knew what he knows now, he probably would have done the same thing. As he says, the mindset is hard to shake.When Simon had his second child, he was working with a slightly bigger firm and was salaried. He wanted to take two weeks off, but felt awkward pressing his bosses. He didn’t want to seem high-maintenance or in need of a lot of management and felt insecure about his job. He was absolutely sure that the decision to stay home with his infant would have been held against him.

Ultimately, he quit and started his own firm. He wanted more control over his own schedule and the chance to work closer to his home. Simon’s story is an example of how one of the most important topics Fatherly has covered, since the beginning, has been around the tensions, incongruities, and conflicts around work-life integration. COVID-19 has both exposed and exacerbated these problems.In the hundreds of articles the editors have published on the topic (before and during the COVID-19 crisis), it’s apparent that work-life integration is holding back businesses, and something needs to give. What Fatherly has found as a publication and a business over the last five years aligns with academic research coming out of Boston College and Wharton, namely that:

• Company retention increases dramatically as a result of men taking parental leave. Per a Boston College study, 75% of respondents say they are more likely to remain with their current employer now that they offer paid leave.
• The cost of paternity leave to companies on the whole is minimal. A 2011 study by Ruth Milkman, a professor of sociology at the Joseph S. Murphy Institute for Worker Education and Labor Studies, and Eileen Appelbaum, a senior economist at the Center for Economic and Policy Research, found that while studying the impact of California’s paid leave program, 91 percent of businesses operating there found either no adverse effect, or a positive effect, on the profitability and performance of workers; and 99 percent reported no effect on, or a positive effect on, company morale.
• We’ve also seen that parental leave improves life, family and relationship satisfaction and lessens burnout, which yields greater levels of productivity per worker upon their return.

There are businesses who understand these facts. If you look at Fatherly’s definitive guides on the subject — the Best Places to Work for Dads, Best Places to Work for Moms, and the Best Places for Remote Working Parents — you can see that the companies that best cater to the needs of working families, like Salesforce, Deloitte and Citigroup, are some of the most successful companies in America. In formulating these lists, Fatherly evaluated companies’ policies, benefits, utilization rates, and cultural practices across 142 points of criteria that we’ve developed over the last five years. Those criteria include what we refer to as the “Core Four” of policies that need to be met in order for a company to be good for parents. These are:

• Parental leave. Companies should offer a minimum of two months of gender-neutral, paid parental leave.
• Inclusivity. Company policies, and the language the company uses, needs to be inclusive. Family and leave needs can take many different forms to reflect that.

• Culture. Benefits on paper is one thing; are people taking those benefits? If company culture doesn’t welcome families, and if managers don’t take advantage of those benefits and policies and encourage their employees to do the same, then the family-friendly benefits are just written, not actual. Benefits don’t matter if people don’t use them, and a high use rate is key.

• Caregiving beyond babies. Paid leave is great, but benefits for working families need to be comprehensive and long-term, not only offered for the first months after welcoming a new addition to the family. People need to be able to take time off to care for their own medical hardships, and to care for their children and other family members when they need it.

While it’s one thing for the editors to focus their journalistic lens on what other companies should do to better serve working parents, the leaders of the company knew that we also had to “walk the walk.” Early on in the company’s history, overseeing a digital media start-up with only a roomful of employees, a question repeated in my mind: How devastating would it be if anyone here had to take three months off to have a kid? My answer was that the company had to put on its own oxygen mask first; we had to first survive if we’re going to be able to serve. So we punted on implementing sound family-friendly policy and instead rested on the notion that hey, we’re a start-up. It’s bound to be all-hands on deck for a while.

This proved to be shortsighted. Repeatedly, we lost out on great mid-career-level talent to other companies that embraced the flexibility that parents of young kids needed. It didn’t matter how much cold brew coffee we had on tap — we stunted the company’s growth by not embracing the benefits that parents actually need to do their best work. We found out firsthand what Milkman has outlined in her work: The cost of paying out someone’s paid leave is far less than the cost of recruiting, hiring, onboarding, and training a new worker. We learned from those earlier mistakes and when we merged with Some Spider Studios in March of last year, we brought those lessons with us. We knew that to grow and compete with the best companies, we needed to draw and retain that talent.

We deliberately rolled out new policies and practices across the current company to address our gaps:One of the main focuses for our company was Gender-Neutral Parental Leave. Previously, we had four months for birthing mothers and four weeks for fathers; now it’s four months for moms, dads, and non-birthing and adoptive parents.Gender-neutral parenting is crucial because the burden of childcare still falls so much on moms. The U.S. Census Bureau showed that the number of actively working mothers declined at a faster rate than fathers during the pandemic. This imbalance still exists, with 1.6 million fewer moms actively working as of January 2020 than the previous year. One of the most cited reasons for this was that mothers carry a heavier burden of unpaid domestic labor in chores and child care. The wage gap between women and men in this country surely exacerbates this issue as well — if Mom or Dad needs to leave work to take care of the kids, that calculation often comes down to simply who makes more. While the pandemic exacerbated and exposed this existing burden, the imbalance begins at birth — with the lack of gender-neutral paid leave policies.

In a 2020 testimony to the House Ways and Means Committee, Vicki Shabo, a senior fellow at the Better Life Lab at New America, mentioned that the economy would be $500 billion stronger if paid family leave were offered to parents, because parents are then not forced to leave the workforce entirely to care for their children.Paternity leave is crucial for more than just involvement with babies after birth or adoption. Richard J. Petts, a researcher on paternity leave at Ball State University, has done dozens of studies on the effect that taking paternity leave has on dads.

In longitudinal studies, he’s found that men who take leave have stronger relationships with their wives, they bond more with their children, and they understand the ins and outs of the running of their household. Taking paternity leave of any length, Petts has found in his own research, has been associated with happier, more satisfying marriages, and reduces the probability of divorce, because child-rearing stress doesn’t rely primarily on moms. Taking leave helps dads become engaged dads who can take care of their children, and their homes, confidently and competently. We also know that people continue to need to take paid leave after the birth or adoption of a child. Dads need to be able to take paid leave to care for their children, for example, in a health emergency. When a child is seriously ill and hospitalized, the presence of a parent shortens their hospital stay by 31 percent. And whether or not they are dads, men should have the option to take leave to care for other family members, like aging parents or other relatives, so the burden of caregiving does not continue to fall disproportionately on women. Paid medical leave is also necessary should someone have a serious health condition of their own that they need time off to take care of. Another focus for our company has been creating affinity groups for new parents who can share resources, best practices, and keep management better informed about how to make sure that we remain a great place to work for employees with kids.

We’ve also attempted to cement a families-first company culture, encouraging managers and leadership to publicly take full advantage of these new policies, and model that behavior for the rest of the company. This includes normalizing kids on Zoom so employees without childcare options don’t feel vilified if they have to do double duty. Family-first culture is not just the right thing to do — it has an impact on the bottom line. Several studies have found that paid family leave is associated with better workplace morale, higher levels of productivity, and less worker turnover. One study of OECD countries, of which the United States is one, found that if the U.S. were to adopt a 15-week paid maternity leave plan, productivity would increase 1.1 percent over time. Per the National Partnership for Women & Families, paid leave improves worker retention, saving employers money.

Eighty-three percent of low-wage workers who used California’s state paid leave program returned to their job. Companies have reported increased worker productivity, employee morale, and heightened global competitiveness between businesses.In other words, parents who take time off stay attached to the workforce, and more often than not return to the same employer, motivated and ready to work. Businesses report little impact on their ability to run business; and disruptions in work due to someone taking leave are reported as minor.

The process to pass our own Best Places To Work requirements took about four months to implement. It required internal conviction from the most senior executives at the company, and it required continued buy-in. The sentiments at our own company reflect the broader mood of the country in which 80% of parents say they’d like to spend more time with their kids, to make better use of the 940 weekends that they have between the time their child is born and the time their child turns 18.

The goal here for our company is twofold: To change the work culture to serve parents and become a more competitive company for it. When a workplace culture revolves around what Dr. Jennifer Berdahl, a professor of sociology at University of British Columbia calls “masculinity contests,” workers work harder, for less. The “contests” refer to cultures where long hours, after-work meetings, weekend commitments, ability to travel, and limitless time to work are seen as the ideal worker qualities. These qualities lead to working parents, who have obligations outside of the workplace, being left out of career advancements and participation in the workplace. They are seen as less dedicated to the job, and they are effectively cut off from advancing in the workforce. This is a culture that is detrimental to the company’s productivity. It is also at odds with workers around the world. A 2018 report from the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development ranked the U.S. dead last among 41 countries for parental leave laws, with all other countries guaranteeing between 2 and 21 months of paid leave.

This is no way to be competitive. Small businesses agree. According to a nationwide survey conducted by Small Business Majority and Main Street Alliance, 70% of small businesses support a federal program to guarantee access to paid leave. We’re one of them — and one of 200-plus companies who sent an open letter to Congress, urging them to pass federal paid family and medical leave in March of 2021.

A national paid family and medical leave policy would allow businesses to compete for the best talent, not just in the U.S. but in an increasingly global labor market, making sure you don’t have to work at a parenting company just to have access to benefits that are standard across the rest of the industrialized world.

C. Philip Hwang is a professor of Psychology at the University of Gothenburg, Sweden. His research focuses on child development, fatherhood, and the linkages between gender, family, and work in post-industrialized societies. He currently oversees the Gothenburg Longitudinal Developmental Study (GoLD), a 30-year prospective longitudinal study of Swedish families.

• Nationalized paternity leave policies in Sweden and other Nordic countries help men to advocate for their own leave at work.
• Support for working dads also represents support for working moms, who they are also looking to retain and reward.
• Research indicates that coparenting is vital to development and that coparenting is a skill that takes time to master.

Children thrive when parents share their care. When dad is not only a source of parental love, but also a consistent presence, and a partner in the joint enterprise of parenthood, children benefit. But the participation of fathers in meaningful coparenting, arguably the most important role a paternal figure can take in terms of promoting early child development, is hardly a given. Men have not historically been encouraged to act as caregivers or to prioritize caregiving. This is why supports like paternity leave that facilitate fathers’ involvement and encourage him to become a competent and confident parent contribute so meaningfully to kids’ long-term wellbeing.

Unfortunately, American policy makers and human resource professionals have struggled to design leave arrangements that genuinely help fathers care for their children, particularly early on in those children’s lives. Schemes from around the world that were announced to great applause have often seen low uptake by fathers, who are — perhaps for cultural reasons and perhaps because they fear professional repercussions — often loath to take advantage of the offerings available to them.

The following originally appeared in a different format on the Child & Family Blog, transforming research on cognitive, social, and emotional development and family dynamics into policy and practice.

That said, pushes for paternity leave and gender equity in caregiving have not been uniformly unsuccessful. In Sweden and other Nordic countries, generous leave policies have met with success. These government policies address two powerful preconceptions about men, that they are indispensable as workers and entirely dispensable as caregivers.

The key to the Scandi success seems to be that benefits are dictated under national laws. That sends a loud signal. Once a set of behaviors becomes a legal expectation, it’s easier to justify on a personal level. It is also, and this is important to note, easier to rally behind in the workplace and at home. As the law created a space for men to be caregivers, men were more empowered to claim it as their own and women were more empowered to treat men as partners — with all the attendant expectations. Parental leave laws promote gender equity from two directions, positively incentivizing all parties.

Reserved time for fathers — “daddy months” as this has been dubbed — has much higher uptake. This “use it or lose it” parental leave, often staggered so it doesn’t coincide with mothers’ leave, empowers and almost forces to advocate for their own leave at work and at home and thereby challenges traditional attitudes in both locations. In Sweden, the introduction in 1995 of a “use-it-or-lose-it” daddy month led significantly more fathers to take parental leave. There was a further sharp increase in the number of days taken by fathers when a second “daddy month” was added in 2002. Now a third month has been added, and we are assessing the impact.

Other design features are also vital for successful uptake of parental leave by fathers — flexibility, large numbers of days available over a lengthy period, high levels of pay replacement and application to those working in the casual and self-employed labor markets.

Along with laws and social support, comes education. Employers in countries with codified protections and benefits for new parents are more educated on the business benefits that spring from supporting fathers. They understand that encouraging fathers to take leave will help long term with employee loyalty and retention. They also understand that support for working dads also represents support for working moms, who they are also looking to retain and reward.

Parental leave functions – for both men and women – by promoting continuous connection to both work and to children. It helps each parent to contribute to parental care and also access the earning and prestige that spring from participation in the labor market. However, the patchy success of parental leave legislation demonstrates that some key ingredients are required. A change in the law that simply allows fathers to take parental leave allocated on a family basis (so the mother effectively forfeits that time) works poorly and results in low paternal participation.

Private sector buy-in is critical, but it’s important to remember that the broadest social benefit of leave programs is the improved wellbeing of children. Fathers are, it’s worth stating clearly, important in early child development. Research does not suggest that fathers are intrinsically necessary for healthy child development and children can thrive without fathers or, for that matter, mothers. But research does indicate that coparenting is vital to development and that coparenting is a skill that takes time to master. By giving parents that time, employers and policymakers can provide clear developmental advantages for children and vital help to working caregivers.

I found it tough and confusing to go back to work after the birth of my child. On one hand, I found parts of office life somewhat absurd in the face of my important new role at home: So many meetings of questionable merit, for example, didn’t stand up to scrutiny. I still wanted to be at home, where I was really needed. But I also found that I was able to focus on my work and do it well with a new sense of clarity and purpose. I didn’t have time to waste; I found that decisions were easier to make. Being at work was oddly refreshing.

But every father’s journey is different. And every father faces different challenges when coming back to work. Some in more conservative workplaces battle the stigma, from other coworkers, that child caregiving is solely a mother’s work. Others are dealing with something much simpler: Trying to be productive in the face of a paltry amount of sleep.

So, how should you approach coming back to work after paternity leave? What’s the best way to get back to it without feeling like you’re miles behind everyone else? Here, with help from family leave experts, are seven ways to put your best foot forward when you return to work.

1. Make a Plan in Advance

Your return to work will be made much easier if you’ve already set up a plan for how you’ll take up your prior duties — and/or acquire new ones. It’s crucial to have those conversations with your boss and coworkers before you take leave.

“This does two things,” says David G. Smith, author of Good Guys: How Men Can Be Better Allies in the Workplace. “One, it implants in people’s minds the expectation that you’re coming back and are committed — that this is normal fatherhood caregiving stuff. Two, it sets some expectations that you may need some flexibility moving forward.”

Point being: It’s unlikely that you’ll perform your job the same way as you did prior to becoming a father. And that’s great. You evolve, and your job should, too.

2. Take Baby Steps

This one is simple: When you’re heading back to work, try to avoid starting on the Monday of a five-day week. Start on Wednesday so you can ease back into working. Better yet, stagger your return over a few weeks.

“Trying to get everything done at once is a horrible mentality to have when you’re returning to work after a long period of time off,” says Richard J. Petts, Professor of Sociology at Ball State. “You’ll never stop working. So, starting with a shorter week and recognizing that you’re not going to get everything done immediately can get you in the right mindset.”

3. Be Transparent

When you go back to work, prepare to do some boundary-setting upfront. You might have to make it clear to coworkers that you won’t be staying past six, or that you’ll be out the door at 4:30 to pick your kid up from childcare.

“You want to be transparent right up front and set those expectations early. You almost have to over-communicate with your co-workers,” says Smith. While you might be thinking about your new roles at home while the project is being doled out, don’t take it for granted that your coworkers are.

4. Find Focus Wherever (and Whenever) You Can

It may be tough to draw a line between work and family responsibilities, especially if you’re still working from home, and even if your partner is trying to give you some space. It can be difficult to, say, focus on filing a report while a baby is crying and your partner needs a break. So, you may need to work strange hours, like late at night or early in the morning — whenever you can find focus.

“When I was a new parent, I felt myself trying to be more efficient in my work, knowing the new importance of being ‘on task’,” says Chris Knoester, an Associate Professor of Sociology at Ohio State University. “But inevitably, you just have to fake it until you make it and do the best you can do under the circumstances.”

5. Propose Flexible Solutions

While you’ll want to communicate to your coworkers and bosses that your life outside of work has changed, you shouldn’t just walk out of a meeting at five o’clock and say, “Sorry, I don’t do that anymore.” Because of course, not. Instead, try to be proactive about proposing more flexible models.

“If a big project comes up and you’re asked to stay a coupl ofe hours late, ask to head out a few hours earlier the next day,” says Petts. “You’re demonstrating that being a father is a priority for you, but your work is still a priority to you, too.”

6. Get Back to Basics

Upon returning to work, you may find it helpful to rely on management strategies such as letting co-workers know that you only reply to emails in certain windows of the day, like from eight to nine and four to five. In addition, Amit Kramer, the Dean of the School of Labor and Employment Relations at the University of Illinois, says that you might need to strip your job down to the essentials just for a while.

“You want to focus on core parts of your job — what you’re being measured on in your performance evaluations — and not on the periphery parts, like committees or extraneous meetings.”

7. Be Realistic

Having a kid (or having another one) will no doubt lengthen your daily to-do list. If you’re lucky, you’ll have fits of supercharged focus. But you’ll also have passages of brain fog. So set reasonable goals for yourself.

“Resolving competing expectations, especially between work and family, involves tough decisions,” says Knoester. “Doing everything is basically impossible. So just do your best.”

In the 1970s and 80s, when Nordic countries first introduced shared parental leave, it was rare to see a father take advantage of it. Staying at home with kids was viewed as women’s work; men who did so were viewed as unmanly. In Sweden, those who did stay at home were called “velour dads,” a slang term for men who dressed in pajamas.

A few decades later, Nordic dads, proudly pajama-clad, have become shining examples of involved fathers. Swedish dads, in particular, are lovingly known as “lattes pappas” — a term synonymous with a hip young father seen sipping small coffees and munching on baked goods (fika) while supporting a sleeping kid strapped to their chest. The mythos mostly holds up: A survey about the state of paternity leave among Nordic dads confirms their place at the front of the pack of modern, involved dads. But it also reveals that they have work to do in terms of fully embracing their roles.

Conducted by Promundo, the “State of Nordic Fathers” report is based on a survey of 7515 people, evenly distributed between Sweden, Denmark, Iceland, Finland, and Norway. It was done in partnership with Promundo’s 2019 “State of the World’s Fathers”, a massive report on fathers from 40 countries about fatherhood, gender identity, and paternity leave, and contains responses from more than 3,099 fathers and 1,646 mothers. The aim of the survey was to compare the attitudes and opinions of parents who took different lengths of leave.

Views on leave have certainly shifted since the 70s and 80s. Parents in Nordic countries, according to the survey, believe that parental leave is no longer for mothers only, with 75 percent of both men and women saying it should be split down the middle between parents. Nordic men are also psyched to be involved in parenting. Between 89 percent (in Denmark) and 96 percent (in Sweden) of fathers not only said they felt capable of being caregivers but also want to be very active in the early months and years of their children’s lives. Between 86 and 94 percent of all parents surveyed also agreed that it’s a father’s responsibility to be heavily involved in childcare.

Why? Men know that playing the role of caregivers pays off. The report confirms the fact that men who take lengthy paternity leave (all countries allow 40 weeks or more of leave, with Sweden offering the longest at 69 weeks) have better relationships with their partners and children as well as greater life satisfaction overall. Fathers who took longer paternity leave are also less likely to adhere to traditional norms of masculinity, less likely to rely on a female partner, and more likely to seek out information on childcare from such sources as parenting books and doctors. To men living in Nordic countries, all of which have had decades of social networks that protect fatherhood, these benefits are well known.

That’s not to say everyone is taking advantage. There’s one failing that Nordic dads share with the rest of the world: They don’t take their paternity leave. “Finnish fathers on average take only 11 percent of the paid paternity leave they are entitled to after the birth of a child,” the report states. “While the figure is close to the same in Denmark, in Norway it is around 20 percent and in Sweden and Iceland nearly 30 percent.” Conversely, nearly 80 percent of moms took more than six months of leave, compared to roughly five percent of fathers.

What gives? Well, the survey shows that a lot of men who didn’t take paternity leave do so because they thought it would negatively impact their careers and relationships with co-workers. Those who said they had more understanding managers, however, were more likely to take additional leave.

Furthermore, gender roles still have a long way to come. Mothers in the survey were much more likely to say that dads should be very involved with childcare, planning, arranging playdates, etc. (85 percent of Swedish moms said as much). And almost all mothers and fathers in the survey agreed that both the father and the mother to be heavily involved in all three forms of childcare.

When it comes to household equality, however, there’s a difference in perception versus reality. While 55 percent of fathers say they share daily planning equally, only 33 percent of mothers agree, saying instead that they either do most or all of the work (64 percent). Between 66 and 70 percent of fathers said they share physical and emotional care equally with their partners, where only half of moms say it’s an equal split.

Of course, this is just a failing in a vacuum. Compared to the rest of the world, Nordic dads are miles ahead. In the U.S., for example, men have certainly increased the amount of time they spend on housework and caring for family members in recent decades, but women still do roughly twice as much around the house.

So, while the Nordic countries do deserve their forward-thinking approach to parental leave and fathers are committed to be excellent caretakers, no place is perfect. Some men are unwilling to take leave if it compromises their standing and are also more likely to overestimate how much they pitch in around the house. Even with the padding they’re provided, Nordic dads have some work to do. Just not as much as the rest of us.

Taking paternity leave is one of the best things a new father can do. Among the many benefits, dads who take leave from work tend to be more confident in their parenting, build a better emotional bond with their child, and have a stronger relationship with their significant other. More generally, paternity leave allows men to experience some of the most fulfilling weeks of their lives. In short: If you have a baby on the way, you should take it.

But you need to make plans to do it — which is easier in some work situations than others. To maintain your reputation as a team player and retain the management of your most favored projects, you want to let your boss know your needs well in advance. Even though you’re essentially “telling” your manager that you’ll be taking your rightful time off, it’s best to do so with tact and graciousness.

“When you’re telling your manager about taking paternity leave, you want to try to do so in a way that doesn’t harm your employer, doesn’t create conflict with your boss, and most importantly, doesn’t create more stress for you at this pivotal point in your life,” says Liane Davey, author of The Good Fight: Use Productive Conflict to Get Your Team and Organization Back On Track.

Here are five things to do before and during the conversation.

1. Learn Your Legal Rights, And Your Company’s Policy

Before letting your manager know of your plans to take paternity leave, become fluent with your company’s policy. Get on the HR site of your company’s intranet and look for details and documentation of the plans offered. It may have changed since you were hired: in order to attract and retain employees in a hot job market, companies are quickly improving their offerings. If you don’t see the details of your company’s plan, check in with your HR rep to clarify. Crowdsource, if you can: if you know of colleagues who have taken paternity leave recently, ask them about their experiences. They may have tips, or they may be able to point out any pitfalls in the process.

If the company you work for doesn’t offer parental leave, you still have the right, in most instances, to take time off. The 1993 Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) guarantees new parents up to twelve weeks of leave per year after the birth, adoption, or placement of a foster child. That’s assuming you work for a company with over fifty employees and that you’ve worked 1,250 hours in the past year. It’s important to note that this federally mandated leave is unpaid.

“Unfortunately, in the United States, the only true job protection we have in this area is through the FMLA. And it does an important thing: makes it illegal to terminate you while you’re out. So you might want to file that paperwork in addition to anything your workplace might offer,” says Tamica Sears, an executive coach and HR consultant. In addition to the FMLA, you’ll want to check and see what the paternity leave laws are in your state. California, New Jersey, New York, and Maine are among states with paid leave acts, and the list is growing.

2. Provide Advanced Notice — Three Months, if Possible

The amount of notice you give your manager, either formal or informal, depends on your relationship with them. If you have a good relationship with your boss and feel comfortable saying “My wife, partner, or spouse, is pregnant, and I need to take the time off starting x y&z,” then it’s probably best to tell them as soon as soon as you feel comfortable with the pregnancy or plan.

The FMLA requires leave to be requested at least 30 days in advance, but you might want to give your manager three months’ notice — or even longer if your position is especially difficult to backfill.

“The reason to give that advance notice is so that you can say to that person, if I’m going to be gone for six to twelve weeks, I want to make sure that I’m setting the team up for success, and to make sure that I’m not causing any single points of failure,” says Davey.

Even if you have a great relationship with your boss and can speak to them casually about important topics at work, you still want to send a formal email detailing your request to both them and your HR representative, so that you’re officially on the record.

3. Walk In With a Plan

It’s in your best interest to make your time away from work go as smoothly as possible — and that means, considering your tasks and projects far in advance. What will you have going on in the coming months, and who on your team might be able to handle the work? Is there a more junior member of the staff who might be ready to step up?

“Take a problem-solving energy to your list. Give your boss a real plan, and try to empathize with them. You want to provide them with as many options as possible so they’re not backed up against a wall,” says Davey.

With several months’ notice, you’ll have time to loop colleagues in on meetings that may give them an idea of the scope of projects that they’ll take on in your absence.

4. Consider How Connected You Want to Be

In terms of being connected to your workplace while on paternity leave, there are several schools of thought. Some new dads go into blackout mode, fully unplugging from their Microsoft Outlook for the duration of their leave. Others check in occasionally on their favored projects, challenging scenarios, or big year-long initiatives. And some favor a dual approach, starting with a no-contact period, then choosing to engage more as the leave goes on.

Give some thought to what you might like to do. And know that it’s better to underpromise on what if anything you’ll be able to contribute while out of the office.

The point here is that even before you leave for paternity leave, you should think about how you’ll return to work — doing so will make your return easier, and ratchet down your stress level while caring for the new member of your family.

5. Understand That the Choice Will Be Worth It

As much as you know that you are an indispensable part of your team, it’s unreasonable to expect that your choice to take paternity leave won’t have consequences. Water will find another way. Your tasks will be picked up by others. Perhaps some will drop off the map. When you are out of sight, you can go out of mind. And in this instance, that’s absolutely okay. Do not let that distract you from taking time.

“Even if it seems like you can’t quantify the value of paternity leave, your child will benefit from in ways you might not immediately understand, in six days, in six months, and in six years,” says Davey. “And you will, too.”

Paternity leave could change the world. A small mountain of peer-reviewed studies and white papers, and statistics backs the idea that having access to paid leave could do nothing short of that. And yet, everything seems to go sideways when the rubber meets the road.

“Taking leave is not normative,” says Richard Petts, a sociologist who specializes in research on parental leave, when explaining the paternity leave statistics that show how few men actually take more than a week of paid leave. He saw why first-hand when he struggled to get time off after the birth of his own child and cobbled together some sick days and the break of a semester in order to do it. He realized, in other words, that he was like many millions of men who didn’t have good access to real paternity leave. But more than that, his work led him to understand that even when dads do have access to federal paid leave, they often don’t take it.

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This is a problem. Men who take leave have stronger relationships with their wives, a better bond with their children, and more appreciation for the running of their household. But the small proportion of men who do take full advantage of leave are disproportionately wealthy, white, salaried workers. And even they report feeling discriminated against for taking the time.

So what can be done to tackle a tower of prejudice against leave that’s as high as the evidence for it? Petts, who has dedicated his career to answering the question, has some ideas. It all starts with access.

What happens to dads when they do have access to and take paternity leave?

I think a few things happen. I think that one basic thing that happens is dads are there to form a connection with their children when the baby is born. These days, one of the first things they do after a baby is born is to give them skin-to-skin contact with the mother to facilitate that bond, that attachment between mothers and the new child.

It’s the same basic idea. If you’re there for the birth, if you’re there for the first few weeks or months after you bring your child home, you are able to develop that attachment. Not only do fathers develop that attachment to their children, but children develop an attachment to their fathers as well. And so you know that that bond, that sense of attachment, is really powerful. So emotional bonds and attachments happen.

Fathers also become aware of what happens in the household after they have a child. When you’re at work all day, every day, you are often unaware of all of the things that need to be done in the house. That’s if you’re home for an extended period of time.

The other thing that happens when fathers are home is that it provides an opportunity for parents to learn how to do things together. The Better Life Lab released a report on men who do care, and one of their findings was that not knowing how to provide care was one of the biggest barriers to fathers being more involved.

Fathers perceive that they’re going to be penalized in some way, shape, or form for taking leave. Workplace barriers to taking leave, and especially extended periods of leave, are still a real concern and still present a problem for many men.

I think this process starts at birth — fathers aren’t around, then mothers learn how to do everything right. It’s not like mothers know how to do everything. We sort of assume as a society that mothers have this innate ability to do all the childcare. The reality is, no one knows what they’re doing when you bring a child home and you gotta figure it all out. If you’re home together, you figure it out together, and you can establish expectations. Who’s responsible for what? At the very least, fathers get that experience alongside mothers. So you minimize the likelihood that fathers get home from work a month after the child’s born and don’t know how to do anything.

You minimize these arguments, where mothers are upset that fathers aren’t doing it the right way. Whatever it might be, paternity leave provides the opportunity to figure things out together, which is gonna get fthe ather’s confidence that “Hey, I know how to do this stuff. It’s not rocket science, I just need to practice.” That’s a really big part of the story. Giving fathers an opportunity to learn how to be caregivers alongside mothers is gonna increase the likelihood that the sharing is more equal among mothers and fathers.

That increased communication and even increased empathy towards all that moms do in these relationships when dads take paternity leave — is that one of the reasons that you’ve found in your research that paternity leave improves the quality of romantic relationships?

I think that’s a big part of it. What we know about mothers’ perceptions of relationships in regards to sharing caregiving is that a large part of it is if you perceive that fathers are helping out, that they’re doing more, you’re more likely to see that relationship favorably.

Even, simply, the sacrifice — I think that’s a fair word in our society, the sacrifice that taking time off of work, given that it’s not widely accepted and that there are penalties associated with it — demonstrates that “Hey, I’m gonna value my family. It’s not all about work.” Even just that act matters.

We know that taking that time off, fathers tend to be more engaged, mothers are more likely to view them as more involved co-parents, more supportive of all of those kinds of things. That’s a big part of the reason why we see positive effects on couples’ relationships when fathers take leave.

What types of dads get to take leave, and which them actually take it?

The vast majority of fathers take some time off of work when they have a child — upwards of 80 percent. That’s true in national representative samples. That’s true in samples of disadvantaged fathers. Most fathers take some time off, but they take very little time off. It’s usually less than a week, it’s, “I took three days off when we were in the hospital,” kind of thing.

So taking at least some time off is a widespread phenomenon. But in terms of who has access to paid leave, it is very divergent. Most fathers do not have access to paid leave. The ones that do are more advantaged in professional occupations. They are higher income, they’re more educated, they’re married, they’re white.

The culture of fatherhood has changed. But has it changed in the sense that we think fathers should take time off their careers to pursue more active fatherhood yet?

Of those people who do have access to paid leave, who take it, and how long do they take? That varies a lot. That varies from what kinds of paid leave we have access to, or if they have to cobble together days of personal time or whatever it may be. It depends heavily on the organization and organizational support. And there’s a lot to do with perceptions of penalties. Fathers perceive that they’re going to be penalized in some way, shape, or form for taking leave. Workplace barriers to taking leave, and especially extended periods of leave, are still a real concern and still present a problem for many men.

Would you say workplace pressure is a driving factor for why men don’t take paternity leave?

I think that’s a huge, if not the top, barrier.

Ideal worker norms are so ingrained in our society, and so closely linked with the norms of what a good father is, and the norms of masculinity that it’s a huge barrier to fathers taking leave. I also think, generally speaking, taking paternity leave is just not normative in the United States. So even if workplaces were like, “Yeah, go ahead,” it’s still not typical. We don’t see or hear about fathers taking three months of leave very often. Men, even if they’re not necessarily convinced “I’m gonna get fired if I do this,” still aren’t seeing this as typical or normal. The idea that a father should take leave is an idea that needs to gain additional support in our society, above and beyond the sort of workplace barriers, even.

Yes, the culture of fatherhood has changed. But has it changed in the sense that we think fathers should take time off their careers to pursue more active fatherhood yet?

You just said that the norms of the ideal worker and the norms of the ideal father are ingrained and are extremely similar. Can you walk that out for me?

The ideal worker norm is the idea that workers should be completely devoted to their jobs and to their companies. They should always be available to work. They should prioritize their work. This is the norm that our economy works on — we’re always available. We have these phones now, we’re always accessible, always available, always thinking about work. We’re a very work-oriented society.

This idea that people should prioritize work and always be available to work has really privileged men because they are seen as primary caregivers. This is a big part of the reason why women are penalized in the workforce — because they can’t adhere to that norm to the same extent that men can due to domestic responsibilities.

Early on in the pandemic, whenever both parents were at home, dads did more. Families became more egalitarian. … As the pandemic wore on, as more and more people sort of went back to the office, access to paid leave has dried up. So we’ve seen a shift back to mothers doing more again. The progress that was made has been clawed back.

And then there’s the traditional sort of aspect of fatherhood. You know, if we think about what makes a good father, the norm of breadwinning, of being the main financial provider, is still very prevalent in our conceptions of fatherhood. Now, we’ve progressed a bit. In the past, we viewed fathers only as financial providers, and I don’t think that’s the case today. I think people expect fathers to be involved in their children’s lives, but not necessarily at the expense of breadwinning.

So the sort of norm of the father as provider directly maps onto this ideal worker norm of always being available to work and prioritizing work, which privileges men.

This is not exactly the same, as women have it objectively and materially worse, but in some small sense, it seems like men are getting the “Can she have it all” treatments that moms who chose to have careers get.

I think that’s exactly the case. Some people, probably a decade ago, called it “the new male mystique,” as a play on Betty Friedan’s Feminine Mystique. Like, this idea that if you look at men’s perceptions of work and family conflict, they’ve exploded in recent decades as expectations have changed. I want to be engaged, but I have to devote myself to work, and how do I balance this? Whereas women have dealt with this, you know, for a much longer period of time. It’s new for men.

So we know paternity leave works to help families bond, weather medical events, gain wealth, limit the spread of sickness in a pandemic. So… what’s the most viable path forward? Is it federally mandated paternity leave?

If the choice were up to me, we would have national paid leave. It would be provided by the federal government. It would be funded out of taxes. It would be accessible to all. I think the challenge with any other option is that access becomes more bifurcated. If you have employers do it well, you have to work for a company that offers it, but the average worker doesn’t work for one of those companies in one of those positions, you know? So, they’re largely ignored.

The easiest way to ensure access to people, and especially for the people that need it most, is a federal plan. Yeah, it’s great that people who work for Wall Street have great leave packages, but those are also the people that can afford really good child care and a whole host of other things that will enable them to achieve more work. Family balance. You know, it’s the person who’s working three jobs to make ends meet and has two kids at home. Like, what about helping them out? That’s why a national paid leave strategy is the best strategy, in my opinion, because they can reach a wider scope of workers to get it right.

The United States practically stands alone in the distinction that this country, one of the wealthiest in the world, doesn’t offer federally mandated paid leave to its 155 million employed citizens. In contrast, of the 193 United Nations countries, only a handful of countries don’t provide paid leave: New Guinea, Suriname, a few islands in the South Pacific, and, of course, the United States.

The closest that the country has come to catching up with the rest of the world is through the Family and Medical Leave Act, passed in 1993, which granted 12 weeks of federal, job-protected, but unpaid leave to eligible private and federal workers.

There are very real upsides to this legislation: It gives millions of American workers job-protected federal leave, not just for the birth of a child, but also for medical events of their own, to caretake for others, or to adjust to the adoption of a child. Still, this is unpaid leave. Even then, it doesn’t cover every worker in the United States. Employers required to offer FMLA have to employ 50 or more employees within a 75-mile radius of the worksite, an employee must have been employed for at least a year to be eligible, and must have worked at least 1,250 hours to be eligible.

In other words, the FMLA is not a true national paid leave policy, and millions get left behind because of it. “It was predictable that women and people of color would be left behind [from the FMLA],” says Erika Moritsugu, the Vice President for Congressional Relations and Economic Justice at the National Partnership for Women and Families. “We’re very proud of the unpaid FMLA. It’s helped millions of people. But 61 percent of workers in America don’t have access to even the FMLA act, because they either weren’t covered by the law, or they can’t afford to take unpaid leave.”

In 2019, more than 32 million workers couldn’t access a single day of paid sick leave, and 4 out of 5 workers did not have access to paid family leave. Only 43 percent of Black workers and 25 percent of Latinx workers have access to paid parental leave, and about 65 percent of Black parents and 75 percent of Latinx parents are ineligible, or cannot afford, to take the unpaid leave under FMLA.

“Paid leave issues are racial justice issues,” says Moritsugu. And the link between comprehensive paid family and medical leave and racial, economic, and gender justice is clear. To talk about paid leave, says Moritsugu, is to talk about racial and gender economic justice — and how the combined crises of COVID-19, the child-care shortage, massive unemployment of women, and people of color, all lead to one road: federal paid leave. Here, Moritsugu walks us through the issues.

What has this current moment — with millions of people but especially women, out of work, and no federal, permanent paid leave plan, showing us?

We come to this moment knowing that a paid family and medical leave policy was always important, particularly in the lens of gender justice and racial equity. But the pandemic has laid bare how bereft we are without that policy in place. We see the results of the inequities that were built into a system. We see the results of policy choices that were built on sexist and racist values. We see women and people of color are left behind. When my predecessors were fighting for the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA), [having it be unpaid] was a compromise that we made to get the bill passed and enacted.

So a lot of people don’t take the FMLA because they genuinely can’t afford it?

There are disproportionate impacts [of the lack of federal paid leave] on people of color. 62 percent of Black adults are either ineligible for, or can’t afford to take unpaid leave. Only 43 percent of Black workers report having access to any paid or partially paid parental leave, compared to 50 percent of white workers.

Why are people of color less likely than white people to have access to paid family and medical leave?

The first is race-based discrimination in employment. Racial disparities and access to wealth and wealth building are compounded by a lack of access to paid family and medical leave. There are disparities in access to other economic support that make it more difficult for families of color to absorb the financial shock of a serious family or medical leave event.

Those disparities include employment discrimination, poverty, economic instability, and the fact that people of color are concentrated in low wage jobs, and don’t have the scheduling flexibility of paid leave. People of color tend to receive lower quality health care services and access, and they experience worse health outcomes than white people. That magnifies their need for paid family and medical leave.

And here we draw back again to the crisis that we’re in — the combined public health and economic crisis during COVID-19.

I read in The New York Times that the highest group of people who have lost their jobs during COVID-19 are actually moms of color.

Women of color suffer most from a combination of these challenges. 74 percent of Black moms are the key, or sole, breadwinners for their families, compared to 45 percent of white moms. And Black and Latina mothers are more likely than white women to report being laid off by an employer, or quitting their jobs after giving birth in order to have time off.

Can I talk to you a little bit about dads?

Absolutely! Please!

At the National Partnership for Women and Families, we usually look at the world through the lens of women, their families, and their community. These policies that I’m talking about are gender neutral. Men need these protections, too.

Counter to the pernicious lies and stereotypes about absent Black fathers that have been peddled about for decades, black fathers are more likely to be involved in care for their children than fathers of other races.

The Centers for Disease Control issued a report that found that Black dads are more likely to provide regular physical care like bathing, diapering, and dressing their young children. They read to them, they help with their homework more often than other dads. They’re also heavily involved in care for other family members.

Nearly 3 million Black men take care of an adult family member or non-relative and 2 to 3 million black million serve as a primary caregiver for a family member. I think that belies what we observe in the world because people talk about it with that stigma — about women as the default caregivers, which is totally the case — but it ignores this other part of the caregiving picture that hasn’t served us a lot.

And it also underscores the critical piece of the comprehensive nationwide Paid Family and Medical Leave program. [It needs to be] built on equity. It must include leave for caregiving, whether it’s for a new child or an aging parent.

Paid leave is definitely not just a mom’s issue, and leaving it at that will leave out a ton of caregivers.

Half of the men in the workplace expect to need the time to care for a sick, disabled, or older family member. So that’s the same share as women. There was a study that found that only one in 20 fathers in professional jobs took more than two weeks off when their most recent child was born — and 3 out of 4 took one week or less.

Low-income fathers face even higher barriers. There was a study of disadvantaged families that found that nearly 60 percent of [low-income] fathers reported nearly zero weeks of paid time away from work after the birth or adoption of a child. Sometimes, this is because men face stigma when it comes to taking time off to take care of a loved one. Taking time away from work for family caregiving has brought harassment, discrimination or mistreatment that results in fathers being less likely to take the leave that’s available to them.

So, not only is it about who gets the leave, but also, how we help create a culture where dads want to or feel comfortable taking it. I’m sure this is especially tough on single parents, especially in a pandemic where child care supports have crumbled alongside a lack of fully comprehensive paid leave.

It’s almost stating the obvious when you look at the data. It’s almost like we didn’t need the data, because it’s intuitive. The crunch that single parents face, being the sole breadwinners and sole caregivers in a time of economic downturn, where women are leaving the workforce, where daycares are closing or shuttered, there’s limited, or very risky in-person schooling…

[Making the choice to leave the workforce] really isn’t a choice, right? It’s not a fair choice and it’s not a sustainable choice. Are you going to choose your own health, or your loved one’s security, over a paycheck? And how do you support your loved ones and yourself without the paycheck?

It’s a choice out of a terrible subset of options that aren’t freeing at all.

Especially because our system is based on racism, sexism, misogyny and xenophobia, this system that we’re in depends on who your employer is, whether or not you’re going to get health benefits — whether you’ve got paid family and medical leave. It’s all tied to being attached to the labor force. And these latest job numbers that we saw, where all of the job losses [in December] were attributed to women leaving the workforce…

For folks who are on the front line who are forced to go to work, who have to make the choice between going to work sick or bringing that sickness back home where there might be folks who are compromised, especially in communities of color that are women-household led, where these are multi-generational households just by tradition, this situation is untenable.

But they might get fired, or they might have run out of leave, or leave might not have been available to them [if they are scared to bring COVID back to their loved ones]. These types of choices aren’t real choices. It’s kind of head spinning to think about how folks are making do. How can we possibly think this is sustainable? It wasn’t even before the pandemic.

Can you lay out to me how having access to paid leave can actually help families maintain and grow wealth?

Wealth building barriers are compounded by a lack of access to paid family and medical leave. Paid leave focuses on the moment of need — when [being able to take paid leave] is necessary — and when the results of it are made crystal clear even though it was observable beforehand.

People of color experience historical, and policy-based barriers, to economic security and stability. Those effects are exacerbated when serious medical and family needs arise.

So, compared to white people, Black people, LatinX folks and Native Americans tend on average to experience much higher rates of poverty and economic instability. They’re paid less. The typical white family has $140,500 in wealth, compared to $6,300 for the typical Latinx family and $3,400 dollars for the typical Black family. Black and Latinx families have fewer resources to draw upon to weather a period of unpaid leave.

Lower wage jobs that do not offer paid leave on a voluntary basis are disproportionately represented in communities of color, even though the business case is there for them to offer paid family and medical leave or even paid sick days.

What difference do wage jobs — which are held primarily by people of cover — versus salaried jobs, make, in the consideration of a paid federal leave program?

The gig economy is not a new thing, especially in communities of color. My family has always been a part of the gig economy. Picking up work where they can, not having the 40-hour week desk job. And again, that goes back to the tie to the workforce. This means that depending on what we call the “Boss Lottery,” you’re at the mercy of the place that you work, and where you work.

And paid federal leave would get rid of that boss lottery?

There’s a bill that just got reintroduced to Congress last Friday by hundreds of members of the House and the Senate. It’s called the Family Act, led by Rosa Delora of the House and Kiersten Gillibrand of the Senate.

This bill includes the lessons that we learned since the passage of FMLA — what the gaps are in coverage, and gaps in access to the unpaid leave. We also learned from the experience of the states that have been implementing paid leave and paid family and medical leave. We’ve learned from some of the design aspects that were needed in order to ensure greater equity and access for people of color and women, and they’re embedded in the Family Act.

The principles of the Family Act include making sure that there’s job protection, so that folks don’t fear the loss of jobs [for taking leave], for availing themselves of a protected right of leave. So there’s job protection, there’s progressive wage replacement, where the lower you’re paid, the higher the reimbursement. That’s important because in the lower wage workforce, people of color and women are disproportionately represented.

So the Family Act accounts for that?

The leave-taking needs to be comprehensive. We love mommies and babies, but we need to be able to care for someone who is sick, including a newborn. Or you need to be able to take care yourself, if you get sick, or if you’re trying to accommodate your own disability. Or if you need to take care of a partner, or a parent, or another loved one.

Another component of the Family Act that is very, very important is an inclusive definition of what family is. Because right now it’s basically that traditional, nuclear family, that many families like mine don’t even recognize in the household. And there are loved ones who you are related to by blood or affinity. They are as cherished, and you’re as responsible for them, even though there’s no blood affinity. That’s really super important in certain cultural enclaves.

One of the beauties of the design of the Family Act is that it’s a social insurance program that is tied to the individual worker. So you’re not subject to the boss lottery. It pays into a trust fund. It comes out of the payroll tax, where an employer pays into a trust fund and the employee also pays equal amounts into the trust fund. So, that benefit, that protection, is tied to the worker. So they get to carry it with them, even if they separate from that original employer.

Think of the veteran community, where folks are really isolated. They need somebody to caretake for them and they may not have access to blood relatives. In the LGBTQ+ community, where marriage and parenting rights may not yet be in effect, that

is really important. Those are a canvas of equity issues that would make this paid policy have greater equity features, in addition to the fact that it’s paid, not unpaid. You can afford to take it.

They say that shopping for dads is difficult. We ask, how so? We are a demographic that is easy to flatter and easy to please. If you think of us enough to buy us something, you’re 90% of the way there. And that last 10%? Ok, that’s the tough part. How do you get us a gift that is unique and useful, something we’ll not just like but actually love? You’ve come to the right place.

For our 2025 list of the best gifts for dads, we’ve curated products that we know and love, ones we can say with confidence stand out from the rest of the pack. And yeah, there are a few things on this list that we just think are cool because why not? We guarantee you’ll find something here to make him — or yourself — smile, smell good, look good, or feel cool.

Every product you see here is independently selected by our editors, writers, and experts. If you click a link on our site and buy something, we may earn an affiliate commission.

Flint And Tinder Flannel-Lined Waxed Trucker Jacket

Huckberry -

Recess Classic Pickleball Set

Recess -

Superman: The Definitive History

This lush coffee table book covers the entire history of 'Superman' from the earliest comic book appearance in 1938, through the Christopher Reeve era, the modern era, and beyond. The perfect, and beautiful gift for even a casual superhero dad. And just in time for the new 'Superman' movie this July.

Amazon -

This lush coffee table book covers the entire history of Superman from the earliest comic book appearance in 1938, through the Christopher Reeve era, the modern era, and beyond. The perfect, and beautiful gift for even a casual superhero dad. And just in time for the new 'Superman' movie this July.

KOW Wagyu Steaks

KOW -

Asket Black Sweatshirt

Asket.com -

Papatui Face Care Bundle

Papatui.com -

AudioTechnica Manual Turntable

Audio-Technica.com -

The Ice Pod

Pod Company -

Rhone Linen-Blend Short Sleeve Shirt

Rhone.com -

Samsung Galaxy Buds 3 Pro

Amazon -

Ooni Volt

Ooni -

AstroAI Portable Tire Inflator Air Compressor

amazon -

Metallica: Load (Remastered) - Deluxe Box Set

Metallica -

MLB Stadium Blueprints

Uncommon Goods -

Miroddi Smart Tracker Keychain

amazon -

Kane Revive

Kane -

Superman 6" Kaiju Battle Pack Action Figure Playset

Target -

Air-Carrier Cargo Box

Flated -

Folio Society Special Edition of 'Neuromancer'

The Folio Society -

Replica By The Fireplace

Replica -

ADIDAS Stan Smith Shoes

ADIDAS -

Star Wars LEGO, The Dark Falcon

LEGO -

No Reception Club Getaway Bag

No Reception Club -

Marvel: The Silver Age From The Folio Society

The Folio Society -

Patagonia Storm Racer Jacket

Patagonia -

Vinyl Me Please Subscription

Vinyl Me -

The Heavyweight Overshirt

Everlane -

Halden Boot

Forsake -

Marcato Atlas Pasta Machine

Sur La Table -

Urban Outfitters Oasis Sweatshirt

Urban Outfitters -

Le Marke Organic Olive Oil

Le Mark -

Mercado Famous Whole Jamon Serrano

Mercado Famous -

Challenger Bread Pan

Challenger Breadware -

RAK LED Light & Magnetic Pickup Tool

amazon -

Momofuku Chili Crisp Hot Honey

Momofuku -

The Our Place Cast Iron Perfect Pot

Our Place -

Ultimate Man Body Scrub Soap by Kiehl's

Kiehl's -

Fellow Stagg FG Pour Over Coffee Set

Fellow -

The Daily Wear Detrola 43mm Watch

Shinola -

The Elevated Cocktail Shaker

Elevated Craft -

James Bond Sean Connery 6-Film Collection (4K Ultra HD)

Walmart -

Fulton & Roark Total Package

Fulton & Roark -

Pepper Cannon by Mannkitchen

Ground pepper creeps its way into a lot of dishes — and wearing your wrist out to grind 1/4 teaspoon of the stuff is never fun. This exceptionally well designed, heavier than it looks mill grinds more pepper per twist than anything on the market.

Mannkitchen -

Voited Cloudtouch Indoor/Outdoor Blanket

Voited -

Atacama Field Watch

Luminox -

Deluxe Skincare Set

When one of our favorite groomers raves about a new skincare line (Amy Komorowski works with Justin Theroux and Adam Driver, for starters), we sit up and listen. And this is one of her go-tos. This particular set has everything he needs for glowing skin: The brand's signature Bro sheet mask, plus an anti-aging moisturizer, a face wash, and a sunscreen. Founded by a husband and wife team based in San Francisco, the line combines efficacy with accessibility. Plus, we love sheet masks.

Jaxon Lane -

Tumbler Diamond Rolling Knife Sharpener Kit

Tumblerware -

Book Fragrance by Commodity

Fragrance doesn't need to be fussy — and shouldn't be. That's the ethos behind Commodity, which started as a Kickstarter campaign in 2013 and became the first direct-to-consumer fragrance brand. Now in its new iteration, after a relaunch, the brand retains its same commitment to simplicity and clarity. This particular fragrance is a heady, crisp blend of bergamot, cypress, and sandalwood, somehow both playful and intense at the same time. Sort of like him.

Commodity Fragrances -

PT-R Weight Kit (100lbs)

5.11 -

Chipper Foam Seat

Made from recycled sleeping pad scraps, this barely-there 5½-ounce foam pad expands to a generous 13-x-17-inch egg-crate slab designed to take the sting out sitting. Take it camping to make sitting in a chair more comfortable, to a festival to keep turf stains off your pants, to the kid's games — or, more pragmatically, use it around the house as a kneepad when you’re under the sink.

NEMO -

Thule Aion Carry-On Spinner Wheeled Luggage Bundle

REI -

The Ergatta Rower

Because exercise equipment has a way of proliferating and is generally ugly, at-home workouts tend to require a sacrifice of one kind or another. The possible lone exception is the rowing machine: Rowing works 86 percent of the body’s muscles and can be as cardio-intense (or mellow) as you like, while improving joint flexibility. One of the newest and sleekest rowing machines, the Ergatta uses actual water resistance, which makes it as effective as it is quiet (as well as cool-looking, with its transparent reservoir). It’s got all the fitness potential of a traditional rowing machine, but packaged with cutting-edge, immersive technology (a reasonable $29/month) that keeps monotony at bay. The jewel in the crown, though, is its design: Handmade of cherry wood, it's the farthest thing from an eyesore, and it can be folded up and stowed away, so it works in even the tiniest of homes.

Ergatta -

Air 2S Drone

The one thing you don’t want to do is crash a $1,000 drone, so the Air 2S makes adjustments on the fly using four sensors that detect obstacles, so even amateur pilots can get killer shots or video. A big 1-inch camera sensor up front captures video in 5.4k with 8x zoom that you can power from an intuitive control from nearly 4,000 feet away. The tracking feature locks in on a person’s face, following them as the drone flies on autopilot.

DJI -

Co-op Outward Low Padded Lawn Chair

REI -

The Freestyle Indoor/Outdoor Projector

Samsung -

Backyard Duracord Hammock

Just looking at this hammock drops your diastolic blood pressure. String this version up between two trees, or on a stand, and the generous 55-x-82-inch hammock will cradle him with an open back that prevents sweating in the summer heat. The cord is as soft as cotton, but the synthetic blend inhibits discoloration in the sun, is anti-microbial, and easy to clean with soap and water when the kids spill watermelon on it.

L.L.Bean -

HW-S60B 5.0ch All-in-One Soundbar w/ Wireless Dolby Atmos

Samsung -

Forge 15 Grill

A propane grill that attaches to a hitch means more storage space in the truck, and after arriving at the campsite or tailgate, you’re cooking at a comfortable height — though it also detaches for tabletop use. The 335-square-inch cooking surface, with two burners, adds enough versatility to grill, use a pan, or boil a pot of water for coffee. And when you’re done, none of that greasy mess is in your car.

Hitchfire -

Sunco Magnetic Filament Rechargeable Table Lamp

amazon -

LISEN Retractable Car Charger

amazon -

KingPhenix Car Seat Cushion

amazon -

Flexipan Dominique Ansel Cookie Shot Mold

Williams Sonoma -

RAK Multitool Pen (2-Pack)

amazon -

OLIGHT Clip-on Flashlight

amazon -

eSamcore MagSafe Magnetic Car Mount

amazon -

MISSION Cooling UPF Performance Hat

amazon -

Master Lock Portable Small Lock Box

amazon -

HOTOR Car Trash Cans (2-Pack)

amazon -

Magical Flames Fire Color Changing Packets (25-Pack)

amazon -

Yuoyar Car Visor Sunglasses Holders (2-Pack)

amazon -

WARSUN Compact Multi-Mode Pocket LED Flashlight

amazon -

Tevelecin Small Desk Fan

amazon -

Every relationship requires conscious fostering of intimacy. For you and your partner to grow with each other, you have to find ways to get to know each other better and listen more attentively. Yeah, this can take some hard work. But it doesn’t have to always feel like work! At least that’s the attitude taken by the recent crop of conversation and activity games for couples, many of which are developed in association with therapists or built on a therapeutic framework.

These games — featuring dares, decks of cards with thoughtful prompts, and some sexy adventures — are genuinely fun. What’s more, they aim to advance the skills that make a relationship work, whether you’re having conversations in areas you and your partner might never have covered, or just having fun getting to know each other again. Here are some of our favorite games for couples.

Healthier Together

Healthy Convo Co. -

Where Should We Begin?

Esther Perel -

We’re Not Really Strangers: Couples Edition

The Adventure Challenge: Couples Edition

Intimacy Deck

Best Self Co. -

Love Lingual

Love Lingual -

Get Closer Conversation Game: Couples

Intelligent Change -