Kelly Gonsalves

Kelly Gonsalves is a multi-certified sex educator and relationship coach helping people figure out how to make their dating lives actually feel good—more open, more optimistic, and more pleasurable. She received her bachelor’s degree in journalism from Northwestern University and went on to receive sex and relationship educator certifications from The Gottman Institute, Planned Parenthood, and Everyone Deserves Sex Ed. Her writings on sexuality, relationships, identity, and the body have appeared in Cosmopolitan, Teen Vogue, The Cut, mindbodygreen, and elsewhere. You can say hi on Instagram @kellyagonsalves and stay in the loop about her latest programs, gatherings, and other projects through her site and newsletter. Right now she’s probably snuggled up with her bullet journal somewhere or dissecting old seasons of The Bachelor though, in case you were wondering.

Self Assessment

9 Big Signs Of A Satisfying Sex Life

No, there isn’t one definition of “satisfying sex”. But there are some benchmarks to know.


32 Dirty Would You Rather Questions to Help Heat Things Up

Ask them on your next date night or whenever the mood feels right.


How To Talk To Your Partner About Having More Sex

This is what the discussion should look like.


6 Ways To Help Your Partner Feel More Confident In Bed

Here are a few ways to support your partner’s confidence in and out of the bedroom.


6 Fun Sex Resolutions To Make This Year

Because why not resolve to make your sex life a bit more interesting?

Love Lost

What It Really Means To Fall Out Of Love

We hear it all the time, but what does it actually look like?


How To Be A Better Lover

This is what it takes to truly connect with your partner.


So, Sex Has Become A Reward in Your Relationship. Is That A Problem?

While the arrangement can add some fun incentives to a relationship, there are certainly some things to keep in mind.

Show Me Love

15 Ways To Be A Little Bit More Affectionate

A little bit of affection goes a long way.


7 Fun Sex Positions You Should Try At Least Once

For those nights that you’re feeling a little adventurous.

Viewing Party

How To Suggest Watching Porn With Your Partner

Here’s how to bring up the subject — and a few best practices to keep in mind if you decide to watch some together.


How to Figure Out Exactly What Turns Your Partner On

There are four broad categories of turn-ons, according to research.


The One Question That Can Change All Your Fights For The Better

Ask it and you’ll find it’s a lot easier to avoid escalation and find resolution.


6 Big Signs You're A Bad Communicator

Criticizing. Shouting. Shutting down. Here are some telltale patterns to understand — and how to course-correct in the moment.


8 Common Mistakes Men Make During Sex — And How To Avoid Them

#4 Following a script.


Let’s Talk About Foreplay: 11 Ways Men Can Mix Things Up in Bed

The first step is to rethink the definition of "foreplay" altogether.


Everything to Know About the “Male G-Spot”

Consider this your crash course for the pleasure center.


How to Ask For What You Want in Bed (Without Making It Awkward)

Your partner isn’t a mind reader, and neither are you. To know how to turn each other’s gears just right, you’ll need to give each other the user manual.