The game of “Would You Rather?” is usually just a fun way to pass the time with good company. Booze is often involved. But asking an array of hypothetical questions can also be a fun, flirtatious way for two people to discuss sexual interests. The binary nature of the game makes it interesting and leads to surprising places. Even couples who’ve been together forever might learn a new thing or two about each other by asking a few dirty would-you-rather questions, and who doesn’t want their would you rather questions a little dirty?
Asking some cheky would you rather questions is good for a relationship. We all know that good communication is key to a healthy relationship. That includes sexual communication. The ability to talk about your most intimate desires, fantasies, boundaries, and cautious curiosities. Typically people assume these conversations need to be serious in tone or nature, but in reality, they can be entertaining and even playful. Hell, they often should be. Below are some dirty would-you-rather questions that are sure to open interesting conversations with your partner, and then some.
- Would you rather hookup on the beach or hookup on the dance floor?
- Would you rather be a 10 in terms of looks or a 10 in bed?
- Would you rather have a partner who’s a 10 in looks or who’s a 10 in bed?
- Would you rather have airplane sex or elevator sex?
- Would you rather marry someone with no sexual experience or a lot of sexual experience?
- Would you rather always be the top or always be the bottom?
- Would you rather have sex early in the morning or late at night?
- Would you rather receive a sexy photo or a sexy phone call?
- Would you rather have really kinky sex or really romantic sex?
- Would you rather give up sex or kissing or the rest of your life?
- Would you rather have only oral or only intercourse for the rest of your life?
- Would you rather have the best sex of your life tomorrow or in 10 years?
- Would you rather have average sex every day or amazing sex once a month?
- Would you rather have super-hot sex but not orgasm or have okay sex and get to orgasm?
- Would you rather have sex in a car sex or sex in a bathroom sex?
- Would you rather have camping sex or shower sex?
- Would you rather dominate or be dominated?
- Would you rather be treated like a good person or a naughty person in bed?
- Would you rather watch people having sex or be watched while you’re having sex?
- Would you rather have sex with a teacher or a boss?
- Would you rather have sex with your celebrity crush or your high school crush?
- Would you rather swap partners with another couple or have a threesome?
- Would you rather try rope play or role play?
- Would you rather have food incorporated into sex or a blindfold incorporated into sex?
- Would you rather be blindfolded during sex or have me wear the blindfold?
- Would you rather have it fast and hard or slow and sensual?
- Would you rather try a new sex position or try a new kink tonight?
- Would you rather have sex that lasted two minutes or two hours?
- Would you rather never masturbate again or never have sex again?
- Would you rather use ice cubes or candle wax in bed?
- Would you rather watch your partner masturbate or have your partner watch you masturbate?
- Would you rather have sex on park grass or in the woods?
- Would you rather be spanked or do the spanking?
- Would you rather never kiss again or never have oral sex again?
- Would you rather talk dirty or be talked dirty to?
- Would you rather have phone sex or Zoom sex?
- Would you rather have sex on a sofa or on an arm chair?
- Would you rather receive nudes or send nudes?
- Would you rather wear a kinky costume to bed or use sex toys?
- Would you rather have sex in the back of a cab or in a public park?
- Would you rather tell your partner you deepest sex fantasy or hear about your partner’s deepest sex fantasy?
- Would you rather always have sex under the covers, or never have sex under the covers?
- Would you rather your partner take your clothes off slowly, or tear them off in a fit of passion?
- Would you rather have your hair pulled or your nipples pinched?
- Would you rather buy a sex toy for us to use or an adult film for us to watch?
- Would you rather never have oral sex again or never have penetrative sex again?
- Would you rather give a lap dance or receive a lap dance?
- Would you rather have your hands tied during sex or wear a blindfold during sex?
- Would you rather be vocal for the duration of sex or stay silent the entire time?
- Would you rather always do it with the lights on or always do it with the lights off?
- Would you rather have sex when it’s really cold or when it’s really hot?
- Would you rather have quickie sex a few times a week, or one long passionate session once a month?
Sign up for the Fatherly newsletter to get expert advice about relationships, fitness, travel, style, parenting, and more in your inbox.
A Few Considerations Before You Start Asking Questions
There are a few rules for engagement you should consider before playing, particularly for couples. Come into this dirty “Would You Rather?” game with an open mind and a willingness to consider new ideas. You should also agree that it’s 100% okay if you’re not interested in the same things. As you go through the questions — which may bring up sexual situations or kinks you’ve never considered—avoid judging each other for what you’re interested in or not interested in. Never yuck each other’s yums, and also don’t pressure the other to consider things they’re just not into. Ask questions, be curious, and validate each other’s desires and boundaries.
If the game gets uncomfortable, stop and check in with each other. Also, make sure you’re both game to have a conversation exploring new sexual interests and desires before you get started. If there’s some underlying stress or tension in the relationship (related to sex or really anything at all), or if one partner is more sensitive around sexuality for any reason, a sexy game like this one might not be appropriate at this time—or at all.
Lastly, when you’re done with the questions, practice a little aftercare: Are there any weird or confusing feelings coming up? Anything you want to circle back to? Anything that was particularly exciting that you want to consider taking next steps on? Make sure you’re both feeling cared for, connected, and also curious about what can come out of this conversation.
This article was originally published on