The summer is just a good time as any to ramp up on your repertoire of groan-worthy parent jokes. Given the cumulative ordeal we’ve been through in the past year, it’s only right that our somewhat return to civilization is celebrated with an arsenal of funny summer jokes that are sure to bring on the laughs. Extra points if you, like many of us, have forgotten the art of small talk. The best kind of summer jokes are the kids that are easy to remember and can be worked into a conversation. Seamlessly, like you just always talk this way.
But don’t try too hard! Unlike oysters, we’re not shellfish with our arsenal of puns; so we’ve compiled summer jokes around almost every phenomenon associated with the warmer weather. Feel free to start your next conversation with “Long time no sea”.
1. What is brown, hairy, and wears sunglasses?
A coconut on vacation.
2. What kind of tree fits in your hand?
A palm tree!
3. What did the little corn say to the mama corn?
Where is pop corn?
4. How do we know that the ocean is friendly?
5. What do you do if you get rejected at the sunscreen company?
6. How do you prevent a summer cold?
Catch it in winter.
7. What do snowmen do in summer?
8. Where do goldfish go on vacation?
Around the globe
9. Where do sheep go on vacation?
10. Why don’t oysters share their pearls?
Because they’re shellfish!
11. What do you call a labrador at the beach in August?
A hot dog
12. When do you go at red and stop at green?
When you’re eating a watermelon
13.What does the sun drink out of?
14. Where do sharks go on vacation?
15. What did the reporter say to the ice cream?
What’s the scoop?
16. What did the beach say to the tide when it came in?
Long time, no sea.
17. What is the difference between a piano and a fish?
You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.
18. Why did the shark befriend the dolphin?
Because it wanted more porpoise in its life
19. Why didn’t the sun go to college?
Because it has a million degrees.
20. Why do fish swim in saltwater?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
21. What do you call a french guy in sandals?
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