As a dad, there’s nothing better than hearing from other people who can empathize about or articulate some truth from the wild world of parenting. It helps you understand that fatherhood is a shared pursuit and, well, that crazy stuff happens to every parent. There’s no better display of this than on Twitter, where parents regularly share the funny, silly, frustrating, and truthful events that happen in their lives. To that end, here are ten of the best dad tweets from this week.
Kill Them With Kindness
“Is it racist to say Canadians are really nice?” – My 11 year old non-racist son.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) December 19, 2017
Alternative Learning Experience
Me: "- remember, if your teachers ask, I took you both out of school early today for an ALTERNATIVE LEARNING EXPERIENCE-"
8yo: "I already did – I told her that we're going to see STAR WARS!!"
6yo: "ME TOO!"
— ReasonsMySonIsCrying (@ReasonsMySonCry) December 21, 2017
Parents Just Don’t Understand
Before I had kids, I had no idea that it's possible to completely ruin someone's day just by telling them it's bedtime.
— Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) December 21, 2017
Ask and You Shall Receive
My son told me I can't have a cookie anymore unless I ask him first, but congratulations on your pregnancy
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) December 19, 2017
Hidden in Plain Sight
I wanted some Cheetos and we were totally out of Cheetos and then it hit me: under my toddler's carseat! I've got Cheetos now.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) December 18, 2017
Road to Nowhere
When you have kids, you’re constantly being forced to hurry places you don’t want to go.
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) December 18, 2017
Half the fun of watching my son wrap a Christmas gift for his mom is knowing that my wrapping sucks much less by comparison.
— TheAlexNevil (@TheAlexNevil) December 17, 2017
On the Move
ME: Your mother and I have decided to move.
KID: I don’t want to move!
ME: Good to know. We were debating whether to invite you.
— The Pale Space Rider IS NOT GOING OVER A RIVER (@truegritrumble) December 18, 2017
Presents of Mind
Me: The kids want to open their Christmas presents early.
Wife: You want to open their Christmas presents early.
Me: They got cool stuff.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) December 21, 2017
We’ve reached the point now when any time the doorbell rings my toddler yells out “another package!”
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) December 18, 2017