One of the best parts of being a dad is the sheer absurdity of it all. The strange sentences you find yourself speaking to your kids on a daily basis; the odd interactions you have with people you’d otherwise never hang out with; and, of course, the wild things your kids do and say every other second. And there’s nothing better than hearing from other people who can empathize with or articulate some truth from that world. Thanks to Twitter, there’s an influx of funny dads who are sharing the funny, silly, frustrating, and truthful things that happen in their lives. It’s a blast. Here are ten of the funniest dad tweets from the past week.
A Whining Example
70% of being a parent is constantly complaining about your kids' constant complaining.
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) November 8, 2017
Batmom to the Rescue
When Mom won't let you fight crime by yourself. pic.twitter.com/rY6fidZHC7
— dadpression (@Dadpression) November 7, 2017
Welcome to the Dadisson Hotel
I call my sons' bathroom "the hotel" because after they use a towel once, they just throw it on the floor.
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) November 7, 2017
The Healing Power of Pizza
My daughter is pretending her baby is sick and keeps telling it "if you don't eat more pizza I don't think you're trying to get better."
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) November 7, 2017
Level Up
Maybe if they called them levels instead of chapters my kids would be more into reading.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) November 7, 2017
Anti-Aging Supplements
it's The Baby's birthday today ~ he's 5 ~ i'ma cry ~ i'm not ready ~ i gotta start giving him cigarettes and coffee so he'll stop growing pic.twitter.com/Uy3QrH5SRq
— Shea Serrano (@SheaSerrano) November 7, 2017
Pure Imagination
My 5-year-old called the frost on the car "frosting" and I just realized her world is 1,000 times better than mine.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) November 9, 2017
Man’s Best Friend
Dad: "Keep that dog away from me."
*2 weeks later*
Dad: pic.twitter.com/x7uLX44v62
— Classic Dad Moves (@ClassicDadMoves) November 10, 2017
What’s Better Than a High-Five?
SON: I guess I'll just have to accept our family's genetic mutations
ME {holding my hand in the air}: High seven
— Todd 'Papi' Carlos (@TheToddWilliams) November 6, 2017
Cleaning Up
You hired a non-singing nanny? Do you even love your kids?
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 10, 2017
