45+ Very Silly Birthday Jokes That Will Get Your Kids Laughing
Honestly, they'll be laughing too hard to blow out the candles this year.
Need to workshop your dad joke bits? Before you embark on the next cringe-worthy stand-up session, plan ahead with these birthday jokes for kids. They run the gamut from silly knock-knocks jokes to ice-cold ice cream puns. But all these kids’ jokes have one thing in common: They’ll make your kids laugh, and laugh really hard. So channel Michael Epps at the dining room table. Aspire to be Kevin Hart in your living room with these funny birthday jokes. As long as there’s family, cake, crafts, and plenty of ill-timed jokes that make the entire room groan, it’s a birthday party your kid will love.
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Omar. Omar who? Omar gosh, it’s your birthday!
- What did the ice-cream say to the grumpy birthday cake? “What’s eating you?”
- What did the cheese say to his friend on his birthday? “Hope you have a gouda birthday!”
- What goes up and never comes down? Your age!
- Why did the little girl get soap for her birthday? It was a soap-rise party!
- What happens when no one comes to your birthday party? You can have your cake and eat it too.
- When I was born, I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
- What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? “Aye matey.”
- Why does the mushroom always get a birthday party invite? He’s a fun-guy!
- What did one candle say to the other? “Don’t birthdays burn you up?”
- What did the teddy bear say when it was offered some birthday cake? “No thanks, I’m stuffed.”
- What do you sing to a cow on their birthday? Happy birthday to moo!
- What did the crab do on his birthday? He shell-ebrated!
- What is it that kangaroos don’t like about birthdays? They only get to celebrate them in leap years.
- What sort of birthday cake do ghosts prefer? I scream cake.
- Patient: “Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.” Doctor: “Next time, take off the candles.”
- Why were there balloons in the bathroom? There was a birthday potty!
- Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday? Because people kept toasting him!
- Why can’t kids remember past birthdays? Because they are too focused on the present.
- What kind of birthday cake does Elsa like? The kind with lots of frosting and icing!
- What did the elephant want for his birthday? A trunk full of gifts.
- How do pickles celebrate their birthdays? They relish the moment.
- Where do you find a birthday present for a cat? A cat-alogue.
- How does the cat celebrate its birthday? It turns up the mewsic.
- What do you always get on your birthday? Another year older.
- Did you hear about the birthday candle sale? It was a big blowout.
- What does every birthday end with? The letter Y.
- What kind of music do birthday balloons find scary? Pop music.
- Why do leprechauns prefer dollar bills to cakes on their birthdays? Because they’re green.
- Why does no one wish owls a happy birthday? Because they don’t give a hoot!
- Did you hear about the tree’s birthday party? Things got pretty sappy!
- Why are birthdays good for your health? Studies have shown that people who have more birthdays actually live longer.
- How come you didn’t get me a birthday present? You did say I should surprise you, right?
- What’s the best thing to say to a cheese-lover on their birthday? “Hap-brie birthday!”
- Why didn’t cavemen send birthday cards? The amount of postage needed to mail rocks got too expensive.
- How do you know when you’re getting too old? When the candles cost more than the birthday cake.
- What did the ocean say to the birthday boy? Nothing, it just waved.
- What do you get when you eat an entire birthday cake? A stomach ache.
- What did the basketball player do before blowing out his birthday cake? He made a swish.
- What do computers want for their birthdays? An upgrade.
- How does a tea bag wish its friend a happy birthday? “Happy birthday best-tea!”
- What did one pea say to the other on its birthday? “Hap-pea birthday.”
- What's the fanciest kind of birthday party you can throw for a dog? A ball.
- What do you get a hunter as a birthday present? A birthday pheasant.
- Why was the birthday cake hard as a rock? It was a marble cake.
- Why couldn't the pony sing happy birthday? She was feeling a little hoarse.
- What do you say to a kangaroo on its birthday? Hoppy Birthday!
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