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The 15 Funniest, Corniest New Year’s Jokes for Kids and Grown-Ups

Ring in the new year with these jokes that will crack your kids up.

Even if your New Year’s Eve still conjures up champagne, glitter, and the promise of new beginnings, your New Year’s morning probably looks different with kids, with its kiddie wake-up call that works wonders for your hangover. But you can still start off the new year right with a stockpile of jokes. These New Year’s jokes will have everyone laughing into next year.

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby New Year!

What is a corn’s favorite holiday?

New Ear’s Day

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What’s a cow’s favorite holiday?

Moo Year’s Eve.

What does a ghost say on January 1st?

Happy Boo Year.

What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar on New Year’s Eve?

He got 12 months!

What do you say when saying goodbye on New Year’s Eve?

See you next year!

Why do you need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?

To ring in the new year.

What food should you avoid on New Year’s?

Fire crackers

Knock, Knock

Who’s there?
Howie.
Howie who?
Howie gonna stay up till midnight? I’m tired!

My friend asked me where I see myself in the new year.

How would I know? I don’t have 2020 vision.

What’s a New Year’s resolution?

Something that goes in one year and out the other.

Where can you find comedians on New Year’s Eve?

Waiting for the punchline

What do you call always wanting a date for New Year’s Eve?

Social Security

May all your troubles last as long as your New Year resolutions.