As a dad, there’s nothing better than hearing other people articulate some truth from the wild world of parenting. It helps remind us that fatherhood is a shared pursuit and, well, that crazy stuff happens to every parent. There’s no better display of this than on Twitter, where parents regularly share the funny, silly, frustrating, and truthful events that happen in their lives. To that end, here are ten of the best dad tweets from this week.
Wood Penguins
I generally think of myself as an okay father but somehow I forgot to teach my two year old son what an owl was and he thought it was called a wood penguin
— International Socceroo Tendency (@crookedroads770) June 10, 2018
Play in the Dirt
Me: How did you get so dirty?
4-year-old: We played a game.
Me: What game?
4: Play in the dirt.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) June 13, 2018
Practice Makes Perfect
OMG! Someone laughed at a thing I did. I should probably do it 8,746 more times in a row to see if they laugh again!
-Kids
— The Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) June 13, 2018
Summer Break
[Summer Break 11:25 AM]
7 year old: DO YOU WANT DINO NUGGETS FOR LUNCH?
12 year old: I just woke up and had breakfast but yes.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) June 11, 2018
Defeat the Baby
Alexa: remind me to feed the baby pic.twitter.com/p3sEUcTgYa
— Michael Margolis (@yipe) June 9, 2018
Screeching Noise
Me: My car is making this awful screeching noise.
Mechanic: Where's the noise coming from?
Me: From the back somewhere.
Mechanic: That appears to be your son screaming.
Me: Excellent.
Mechanic: …
Me: So how much to make it stop?#parenting
— Jack's Dad (@DaddingAround) June 14, 2018
Incompossible
Wife: I'm leaving you
Me: why
Wife: You keep misquoting princess bride
Me: *under my breath* incompossible
— Llama In A Tux (@LlamaInaTux) June 13, 2018
Weight Loss
Kids: Dad, you look like you've lost weight.
Me: Really? You think so?
Wife [from bedroom]: HAS ANYONE SEEN MY SPANX?
Me: hide me
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) June 15, 2018
On Top In This Town
Yesterday our preschooler called his mom a princess.
Today he told her she was old.
Guess it's hard to stay on top in this town.— dadpression (@Dadpression) June 13, 2018
Camp Drop Off
[dropping son off at camp]
son: I'll miss you
me: We'll miss you too buddy
son: I'll call every night
me: We won't answer
son: What
me: What— Josh (@iwearaonesie) June 15, 2018