As a dad, there’s nothing better than hearing other people articulate some truth from the wild world of parenting. It helps remind us that fatherhood is a shared pursuit and, well, that crazy stuff happens to every parent. There’s no better display of this than on Twitter, where parents regularly share the funny, silly, frustrating, and truthful events that happen in their lives. To that end, here are ten of the best dad tweets from this week.
3-year-old: Want to hear my horse sounds?
Me: That's talking.
3: It's a talking horse.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) May 24, 2018
I’m sorry I got upset when you were fighting over whose turn it was to play with the air guitar.
— The Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) May 20, 2018
I don't care how many parenting classes you attended, nothing properly prepares you for a tiny person regularly crapping in your living room.#parenting
— Jack's Dad (@DaddingAround) May 22, 2018
Bounce House Surprise
Parenting tip: Add a new level of excitement to your child's birthday party bounce house by throwing four live raccoons into the mix.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) May 24, 2018
BREAKING NEWS MY SON JUST WON THE TITLE OF SOPHOMORE CLASS PRESIDENT and as his first acts will be meeting with Kim Jong Un to help dismantle their nuclear arsenal, re-establishing good trade relations with China, and then maybe a Yankee Candle fundraiser, idk.
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) May 24, 2018
Relive Your Youth
Your kids have a way of making you relive your youth.
Like when I'm watching my toddler take an hour to eat one banana, I think back to my younger years without kids.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) May 24, 2018
Play the Lottery
12-yr-old: “How come you play the lottery but never let us play the claw machine games because you say it’s a waste of a dollar?”
Me: *Stares blankly ahead trying not to make eye contact*
— Dad Bits (@DadBits) May 24, 2018
“These desserts would be great to hide Benadryl in”
-my friend, saying most parental thing I’ve ever heard
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) May 24, 2018
A Gift for Teacher
Me: how was school today?
6: good but the year's almost over and it's nice outside so I don't like being in class.
Me: what can we do about it?
6: give my teacher wine as a gift?
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) May 24, 2018
If your toilet paper roll looks like this… you probably have kids pic.twitter.com/34G2dVdJLh
— The Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) May 23, 2018