Dad Jokes

This Viral Thread Of The Best Jokes Ever Is Full Of Surprisingly SFW Dad Jokes

Get ready to groan! (In a good way.)

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1950s distressed father holding baby while talking on telephone. (Photo by Debrocke/ClassicStock/Get...
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Dad jokes are harmless, silly, and often eye-roll inducing, but that doesn’t mean they won’t have you laughing until it hurts. If you need some new dad jokes to add to your repertoire, or you could really use a laugh, there’s a viral Reddit threat that has you covered.

On Reddit, in the /AskReddit community, Redditor u/MrMidnightDiamond asked everyone to add their best jokes to the thread, and that’s what people did. More than 7,700 really funny jokes were shared — and so many of them were of the safe-for-work, Dad-joke variety.

u/bevnrocky’s joke was short and sweet: “Why are balloons so expensive? Inflation.”

“A man goes into the doctor and says ‘I think I have hearing problems,’" u/Stigofthedumpings wrote. “Doctor: ‘Can you describe the symptoms?’ Man: ‘Sure! Homers fat and Marge has blue hair.’”

“I took the shell off my racing snail to make it go faster,” u/shelledtortoise’s joke begins. “If anything, it just made it more sluggish.”

u/Christian-Metal’s best joke all hinged on being a play on words, and it’s a joke that just gets more cringe as it goes on: “I love telling jokes about the Titanic, they always go down well,” he joked. “A great way to break the ice. But not too often though as I have found my friends get that sinking feeling when I am about to tell one.”

“Someone found a hole in the nudist colony fence,” Redditor u/PunkRockFatBeats shared. “Police are looking into it.”

u/Dear-Interaction-210 had an all-timer groaner: “What’s a foot long and slippery?” The answer? A slipper.

“My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo,” is u/sharrrper’s perfect joke.

“A lady walks into a bar and orders a double-entendre, so the bartender gives it to her,” u/jugglervr writes.

But u/Loud-Vacation-711 might have had the best joke of all: “2 fish in a tank one turns to the other and says [sic] "do you know how to drive this thing”? ”

To read more golden jokes to add to your dad-joke repertoire, check out the thread on Reddit.

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