Life

White House Asks Kids To Play “Build the Wall” Game At Halloween Party

The game, which tasked kids to wear construction outfits and stick red bricks to a wall, seems extremely boring.

by Lizzy Francis
GETTY

On October 25, the White House hosted a Halloween party for the families of executive branch employees. It featured costumes, candy, and, because we’re all living in the darkest timeline, a “Build the Wall” game where kids were encouraged to wear construction gear and paste red paper bricks to a wall. (It should be noted that the wall is not made of bricks.) This “game” was without a doubt, as many, many have noted, wildly inappropriate, un-American, and xenophobic. As far as kids’ party games go, it was also really, really boring.

Horribleness of the game aside — which, let’s face it, was almost definitely conceived by that walking corpse Stephen Miller who doesn’t need to wear a Halloween costume to terrify children — what was the point? To attach tape to a piece of red paper and stick it on a wall? Yay? After you build it, what do you win? What makes you the winner? The Trump White House is all about winners, right?

If this was a shoddy rip-off of Pin the Tail on the Donkey, at least the players should’ve been blindfolded, spun around, and, teetering, tasked with placing a useless brick that won’t help migrants or solve the migrant crisis in the correct spot. That’s fun and challenging and has an actual goal. Kids enjoy that. That’s why it’s a classic party game, right? Even the most boring kids’ birthdays hosted by the most boring parents have some version of it.

But no. Kids walked up and pasted a brick to the wall. Could they have put less thought into this game? At least when presented with the loose concept of a “Build the Wall” game, the party planners for this terrible idea of fun could have sent out an intern to get some, I dunno, building blocks. At least letting kids actually do some building has a goal and allow children to flex their creative muscles and fine motor skills. Hell, there could’ve been prizes set up for the best section.

But what happened when the final red brick was laid in the Build the Wall game? Did a cage of toy snakes and alligators fall from the sky like those that President Trump wanted to fill a moat around the wall with? Did a kid get a commercially available power tool to saw through the wall, because that’s what smugglers are doing on the Southern Border, because the wall is an exceptionally dumb idea? Do tubes of toothpaste and soap, two things which have been withheld from border detainees, rain down on the champion?

Seriously, though: Did any child laugh with joy when taking part in this assembly-line-of-hate simulation? What was the point?

We all know the answer: there was no point. And here we are talking about yet another horribly tone deaf thing the White House did on a day that was made for children and supposed to be a short pause from the terrible things they have wrought. This physical manifestation of how the GOP has embraced fascistic immigration policies, separated more than 5,000 migrant children from their parents, let dozens die in ICE custody, abandoned the Statue of Liberty’s mandate of accepting all who come to America for a better life was the best they could come up with? Stick to egg rolling.