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Is it Normal to Have a Mushroom Dick? A Urologist Explains Trump’s Penis

It's not the dark cloud is sounds like, experts explain.

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Stormy Daniels recently revealed that President Trump has the pubes of a yeti and a penis that bears an unfortunate resemblance to a mushroom. Although the porn star also shared inside information about Michael Cohen and the Trump administration, the fungus among us has raised the most questions since The Guardian obtained an exclusive copy of the book. What is a mushroom dick? Is it a disorder or genetics? If there is a God—why did he do this?!

We assume that mushroomed males are merely men with abnormally large penis heads. If so, such men can rest assured an unusually endowed glans is not a disorder, urologist Dr. Jamin Brahmbhatt explains. In fact, mushroom dick may be how nature ensures peak fertility. “From an evolutionary standpoint there is a thinking that the glans and penis have evolved into the way they are today for the purpose of getting sperm into the deepest darkest areas of the vaginal vault,” Brahmbhatt told Fatherly. “The unique shape of the glans, when erect, is meant to remove old sperm before you deposit new fresh sperm.”

Overall penis shape and size and shape are determined by a combination of genes on the X and Y chromosomes, so Trump can probably blame both of his parents for his mushroom. But whether you’re  a dad concerned about his glans, or the president of the United States dealing with a sex scandal, the contours of your mushroom dick do not really matter. 

“I would say there is little benefit or disadvantage to a larger than normal glans,” Brahmbhatt.  

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Besides, from an evolutionary perspective, the point of the penis is to not look appealing—it’s to get the job done. And that job is to pass on the best genes for survival. Handsome penis genes are comparatively less important. “The penis, in the end, is an organ for the procreation of the species. Yes it’s there for pleasure too but the end goal is passing on your genes to the next,” Brahmbhatt says. “The size and shape are irrelevant when it comes to this.”