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The 56 Funniest, Snowiest Winter Jokes for Kids and Chill Adults

The only cure for winter cabin fever? Snow jokes for kids who need a laugh.

During the winter, there are simply no jokes like snow jokes. After all, when it’s cold and snowy outside and the family is trapped inside, a robust roster of winter jokes for kids is a must-have to keep everyone from going crazy with cabin fever. Quarantine turns up the pressure on parents, making snow jokes for kids all the more vital to surviving the cold season. A dad joke or two can help everyone make it through the day, and a few winter jokes can help kids look on the bright side no matter how little sunlight there actually is. These top snow jokes and winter jokes for kids will get your children to laugh (and help you relax) no matter how cold it gets.

  1. What do snowmen call their offspring?
    Chill-dren.
  2. What did the icy road say to the car?
    Want to go for a spin?
  3. What falls in the winter but never gets hurt?
    Snow.
  4. What does a gingerbread man put on his bed?
    A cookie sheet!
  5. Why did the girl keep her trumpet out in the snow?
    She liked playing cool jazz.
  6. Knock, knock
    Who’s there?
    Icy.
    Icy who?
    Icy you!
  7. How do mountains stay warm?
    They put on their snowcaps.
  8. What do you call it when a snowman throws a temper tantrum?
    A meltdown.
  9. What is a snowman’s favorite snack?
    Ice Krispies treats.
  10. What does December have that no other month does?
    The letter D.
  11. Where do snowmen put their money?
    Snowbanks.
  12. What’s the difference between a Christmas alphabet and the regular alphabet?
    The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
  13. What is the best breakfast cereal to eat in the winter?
    Frosted Flakes!
  14. Where do snowmen love to dance?
    At a snow ball.
  15. What’s a snowman’s favorite drink?
    Iced tea.
  16. What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman?
    “Have an ice day!”
  17. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
    Frostbite.
  18. What can you catch with your eyes closed?
    A cold.
  19. Why did the girl keep her saxophone out in the snow?
    She wanted to play cool jazz.
  20. What falls in the winter but never gets hurt?
    Snow.
  21. Knock, knock
    Who’s there?
    Scold.
    Scold who?
    ‘Scold outside!
  22. Why are winter days great?
    They’re snow much fun!
  23. Why was the blanket discouraged?
    The snuggle is real.
  24. What do you call a snowman in summer?
    A puddle.
  25. Did you hear about the snowman spy?
    He has a license to chill.
  26. What did one snowflake say to the other?
    You’re one of a kind.
  27. How do you warn one of Santa’s helpers?
    Check your elf before you wreck your elf.
  28. Did you hear about the rude snowman?
    He didn’t carrot all.
  29. What do you call a glove combined with a snake?
    Smitten.
  30. Did you hear about the lisping snowman?
    He came, the thaw, he conquered.
  31. Why do Klingons prefer winter for cooking?
    Their dishes are best served cold.
  32. I warned him about starting his own ski resort.
    It’s a slippery slope.
  33. No one likes eating outside in the winter.
    It’s frost come, frost served.
  34. What did the sign say in the reindeer stable?
    “There’s snow place like home.”
  35. Did you hear about the politicians whose best speeches were outdoors in the winter?
    He could really turn a freeze.
  36. Why is Frosty never late?
    Time waits for snow man.
  37. Why is it hard to ski after a fresh snow?
    With great powder comes great responsibility.
  38. What did one skier say to the other?
    Alpine for you when you’re gone.
  39. What did the Austrian skier yell when he sprained his ankle?
    “Alp!”
  40. What do you call a snowman having a temper tantrum?
    A meltdown.
  41. What do you call a winter monster with a six pack?
    Abdominal snowman.
  42. What do yeti on diets eat?
    Iceberg lettuce.
  43. How do you decorate a snowman’s cake?
    Lots of icing.
  44. How do you make up a snowman’s bed?
    Fresh sheets of ice and a thick blanket of snow.
  45. Why can’t you trust snowmen?
    They’re real flakes.
  46. Why are snowmen great at parties?
    They always break the ice.
  47. How does a snowman convince someone he’s serious?
    “Snow joke!”
  48. What’s the scariest part of owing Santa money?
    He snows where you live.
  49. What do you call an igloo without a bathroom?
    IG (no loo)
  50. What did the dog musher say when he got lost?
    “I’ve sled us astray.”
  51. Did you hear about the man buried alive under a sudden snowstorm? 
    He was feeling under the weather.
  52. What do you call one day below freezing and the next day at 70 degrees?
    “It’s snowing today, but water you doing tomorrow?”
  53. How do you build a snow fort?
    You igloo it together.
  54. Why are wintertime fortune tellers so reliable?
    They can see what is mitten in the stars.
  55. Did you hear about the snowman who fell in love with a mitten?
    It was glove at first sight.
  56. What advice should you give to snow moving to the big city?
    Flake it ’till you make it.