The raison d’être of pumpkin spice macaroni and cheese isn’t to taste good or to attract sales. No, it’s a thinly veiled attempt to coopt the backlash against the ubiquity of pumpkin spice by making a product bizarre and unappetizing enough to inspire articles like this one.
This particular autumnal foodstuff comes to us courtesy of Kraft Heinz Canada. What we know as Kraft Macaroni and Cheese comes in the same blue box up north, but it’s known as Kraft Dinner and it’s a staple of the Canadian diet.
The pumpkin spice variety of KD incorporates the cinnamon, allspice, ginger, nutmeg, and cloves into its standard cheese powder. The promotional photos of the stuff show it being served in a coffee cup, a nod to the popularity of the flavor in coffee-based concoctions.
Further evidence that Pumpkin Spice KD is a marketing stunt is that it won’t be produced at mass quantities and made widely available in stores. Just 1,000 people will be able to try it, and they’ll be chosen off of a list of those who fill out a two-question survey at pumpkinspicekd.com.
(Un)fortunately for those us down south, only Canucks are eligible to taste this autumnal variety of what’s been called the “true national dish” of Canada. That might come as disappointing news, but the choice between pumpkin spice KD and the recently launched varieties of Cheetos Mac ‘n Cheese, we’ll trust Chester Cheetah every time.