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Funny Pregnancy Meltdown Stories: 11 Dads Share Their Wife’s Best

While there’s nothing funny about the brutal instability of pregnancy hormones, their comedic timing is undeniable. Here, 11 dads share their better half's funnier meltdowns.

by Matt Christensen
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Hormones are a hell of a thing. Pregnant women — and their friends and family — know this quite well. And most pregnant women will freely admit that, when it comes to the barrage of hormonal commotion during the nine months of pregnancy, there are times when their moods are as unpredictable as vintage Shyamalan. Each trimester brings with it a unique set of emotional challenges, none of which should be dismissed, but all of which can result in brief moments of overreaction and humor. So, while there’s nothing funny about the brutal instability of pregnancy hormones, their comedic timing is undeniable. From losing it over a cute leopard to breaking down over burnt toast, here roughly a dozen strange, silly, and surprising pregnancy meltdowns.

The Leopard Incident

“I forget how far along she was, but my wife lost it – just lost it – over a video of a newborn snow leopard that had been born at our zoo. Someone sent it to her on Facebook, and I heard the ‘DING!’ from the message. Next thing I know, she bursts into hysterical tears. I thought someone had messaged her that someone else died, or something. No — just a fluffy little snow leopard playing with a ball. Have you ever seen the video of the girl who freaks out about how much she loves cats? It was kind of like that.” — Rick, 35, Ohio

The Eggsssssss

“All it took was a carton of eggs to set my wife off. We were putting away groceries, and she dropped the eggs. Like half of them popped out and broke. It was a mess, and it was inconvenient, sure, but you would’ve thought she dropped the actual baby. We cleaned it up, and had a laugh about it, but that was my first experience with pregnant hormones. I won’t lie, it scared the shit out of me. I thought I was missing something. Like I thought there was a crisis going on that I wasn’t getting or understanding. So I kept asking, ‘What’s wrong? What’s wrong?!’ And she was just like, ‘The eggsssssss!’” – Aaron, 39, Illinois

The Broken Steam Mop Breakdown

“My wife thought our steam mop broke while she was in the middle of cleaning our dining room. She started kicking it and hitting it. And yelling at it. That’s when I came in to see what was wrong. She seemed to be taking it very personally, like it was her fault that the thing stopped working. So, we hugged it out for a while, she calmed down, and I fixed the problem — the plug came out of the wall. Luckily, she saw the humor in that instead of getting more upset. I’m not sure what that meltdown aftershock would’ve looked like.” – Travis, 34, Pennsylvania

A True Burrito Bomb

“I will never, ever forget my wife’s Chipotle order again. Burrito. Half white rice. Fajita veggies. Steak. Mild, medium, and corn salsa. And no cheese. It’s been seared into my brain because, when she was pregnant with our second child, I accidentally got cheese, and she lost it. She hit me with the, ‘You don’t love me!’ stuff – over cheese – and it was almost like watching an out-of-body experience. Like her hormones were controlling her with puppet strings from above or something, because that definitely wasn’t her talking. It was the pregnancy. Happy ending, though: I got to eat two burritos that night.” – Jon, 40, New York

The Spelling Bee Snafu

“We were watching the National Spelling Bee, and my wife cried when one of the kids got knocked out. It took me completely by surprise. We were just sitting there, quiet, and all of a sudden I see her whimpering and fighting back tears. I thought she was hurt, or in pain. When I asked her what was wrong, she just said, ‘He tried so hard. HE TRIED SO HARD!’ It legitimately took me about 30 seconds to figure out she was talking about the kid on TV.” – Eddie, 37, California

A Lot of Pride For Simba

“So, when she was pregnant, my wife got really into The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt on Netflix. It was a funny show. One of the characters, Titus, is this over-the-top, aspiring actor/singer. In the final episode, he gets cast in The Lion King on Broadway. As he’s performing, my wife starts putting her hand over her mouth and turning red. I thought she was going to throw up. Then she starts bawling and talking about how proud she is of him, and how she’s so happy he made it. Like, full on meltdown while this dude is dressed as a lion singing ‘The Circle of Life’.” – Carlson, 31, New Jersey

Quite the Pickle

“We ran out of pickles. Actually, technically, we ran out of Vlasic Snack’mms Spicy Minis’, which had become her go-to craving buster at the time. We had like three other types of pickles in the fridge. There were pickle spears, some of those hamburger pickles, and some kind of gherkin deal. But the absence of those Spicy Minis was enough to send her to DEFCON 1. I think she just felt helpless. Pickles, you’d think, are something you can control. At a time when so much of your mind and body is out of your control, that’s a precious thing. So, actually, I kinda understand the meltdown. In theory, at least.” – Brian, 38, Ohio

The Burnt Toast Breakdown

“We only had two pieces of bread left and my wife burned them when she tried to make toast. I think this was when she was about six months pregnant, so she was dealing with some hardcore hormones. She kept saying, ‘I can’t do anything right! How am I going to raise this baby?’ I tried to comfort her, told her it wasn’t a big deal and, of course, rushed to the store for more bread.” – Trevor, 37, Montana

The Shirt Shakedown

“My wife bought me a shirt that just wasn’t my style. So, I…politely declined, I guess? I should’ve just sucked it up and worn the shirt. She burst into tears and thought said I didn’t love her anymore. And she kept apologizing, like she was throwing herself at the mercy of the Supreme Court or something. ‘I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I screwed up!’ I calmed her down, assured her that she did absolutely nothing wrong, and told her how much I appreciated her thinking of me. I still have the shirt. I’ve never worn it, but I felt like it would make for a good story down the road.” – Dan, 45, North Carolina

The Bed-Making Meltdown

“I completely sympathize with this one, because I’ve almost come to tears over it, too. My wife was trying to make our bed, and she couldn’t get the fitted sheet on. I didn’t see the struggle, but I came in and she was bawling. She told me that covering one corner made the opposite corner pop up, and that it kept happening, and that it made the mattress topper flip over, and on, and on, and on. She was frustrated. And, like I said, I get it. Fitted sheets are a bitch.” – Joe, 39, New York

Losing it Over a Lost ID

“My wife told me she had a complete breakdown when she forgot her ID badge for work. She told me that her co-workers found her curled up on the floor in her office, and they thought I did something. Thanks, guys. Once they got the truth out of her, she told me they all shared a big laugh. She called me after the dust settled and told me, so I was able to find her ID and leave it on the counter with some flowers for when she got home.” – Robert, 35, Indiana

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