Divorce Advice: 19 Tips to Help Make the Process as Painless as Possible

Divorce is never easy but there are ways to make it easier. This advice from lawyers, mediators, and relationship experts can help.

by Fatherly
Originally Published: 

Whether you saw it coming, initiated it yourself, or were blindsided, divorce is never easy. It is, for all intents and purposes, the end of something you once thought was permanent. Therefore, it’s easy for anger, resentment, and other such powerful emotions to cloud the divorce proceedings that follow and make them much more painful both in terms of emotions and expenses. If measure are not taken, for instance, to help you deal with the grief of divorce, you could turn your divorce attorney into a therapist and thus skyrocket the cost of his or her services. And if that sadness morphs into anger and you lose sight of what you really want from your divorce — a good relationship with your soon-to-be co-parent, the respect of your kids — the consequences are severe. Following the right divorce advice, then, is important.

To help steer you properly, we spoke to a variety of divorce lawyers, mediators, and relationship experts for some steps to take to ensure your divorce is as painless as possible. Here, then, are 19 pieces of divorce advice, for helping to make the process as painless as possible.

1. Know What You Want

Angie HooperThe Eternity Rose

2. Think of the Children

Law Office of Emily Rubenstein

3. Look to Mediation…

Off the Record Mediation ServicesDori Shwirtz

4. …Or Consider a Collaborative Divorce

collaborative divorce

5. Talk to a Therapist

Cohen & Winters

6. Or Consider Jointly Seeing a Couple’s Counsellor

7. Shift Your Perspective

Reverend Ronnie Rol

8. Learn as Much as Possible About the Divorce Process

Accord Mediation

9. Don’t Go the DIY Route

10. Take Time to Find the Right Divorce Attorney

Finding the right person is crucial,Stephen L Cawelti

11. Love Your Children More Than You Dislike Your Ex

12. Get Your Finances Organized

13. Remember: Sometimes, Less Is More

Miller Law Group.

14. Try to Focus on Gratitude

Andrea HippsThe Best Worst Time of Your Life: Four Practices to Get You Through the Pain of Divorce

15. Build a Support Network…

16. …But Draw Boundaries

Naya Clinics

17. Commit to Having Mutual Respect For One Another

18. Avoid Revenge Seeking

19. Take the Time to Grieve

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