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85 Small, Nice Things to Do for Your Wife This Valentine’s Day

Because you can do better than chocolate and grocery store flowers.

Valentine’s Day may feel like a romantic cliché, but it’s a good excuse to show affection to the person you love. Whether you love, hate, or feel meh about the holiday, it’s nice to have a moment that celebrates this. Truly great Valentine’s Day ideas can be elusive in the best of times, and chances are you’ll need to rethink how you celebrate this year. The normal plans of concerts or fixed-price dinners or sipping cocktails at some hip speakeasy are out. Safety precautions require that we save those reservations for another time. But having fun and laughing is still in, and there are so many other ways to show affection, appreciation, and love for your partner. For some inspiration, we’ve come up with this list of small, nice things to do on Valentine’s Day for your wife or partner. Yes, some are tried-and-true (and yes, you should get some damn flowers), but many are brand-new. All, however, are sweet gestures meant to show that you care about them.

87 Small, Nice Things to Do for Your Wife on Valentine’s Day

  1. Make her a mixtape. Or a playlist if you’re not an old person. Could be songs you were listening to when you started dating, songs you both like, or one of those cool playlists where if you read every song in the tracklist it’s like a message.
  2. Leave some Post-Its for her everywhere ⏤ on the bathroom mirror, in her laptop, on the steering wheel, in her sock drawer, etc. Ideally, include compliments, memories, and a few innuendos
  3. Take a bunch of dumb online personality quizzes together.
  4. Give her a day of total control over the little things. She gets to pick movies, food, activities, whatever it is that you two do.
  5. Make a list of things for which you’re proud of her. Don’t be vague. Choose real things. Appreciation is crucial.
  6. Set a price range and make a dumb impulse buy together.
  7. Vacuum underneath the couch.
  8. Does she usually handle the meal or bottle prep in the mornings? Do it for her.
  9. Make her a homemade card from the kids.
  10. Buy a pack of kids Valentine’s Day cards. Give her one the best one. Hell, give her five and place them all over the house.
  11. Clean the tub.
  12. Put your phone in a shoebox for the night. Don’t take it out.
  13. Set your phone alarm or radio to play a song she likes when you wake up.
  14. Send her an internet thing that you know she’ll like. Maybe it’s a .gif, cat video, or funny article ⏤ it doesn’t matter. Just something good to give her a small bit of happiness.
  15. Ask her if she’d like some time alone. There’s nothing more romantic than demonstrating that you’re not needy.
  16. Does she have to go out? Warm the car up for her.
  17. Put something weird next to her coffee cup. Could be chocolate. Could be a toy. Could be a drawing of an ocelot wearing sunglasses. The point is: she’ll find it and be amused, touched, or both.
  18. Take out the trash. Feels like a weird thing, but it’s hard to have a special day when garbage is just laying around. Also, tidy up a bit. It makes a world of difference when it’s time for a romantic gesture.
  19. Warm-up her towel, robe, or slippers in the dryer. That way she has something cozy to slip into when she first wakes up/gets out the shower.
  20. Do a few extra chores around the house, and don’t point it out to her. Better yet, do the one chore she hates to do the most.
  21. Make some quick brownies. Except make them in a muffin tin. That way, every piece is an edge piece.
  22. Let. Her. Sleep. In. Keep the kids busy, or get them out of the house.
  23. Send her flowers. Just do it.
  24. Give her a back rub without making a big deal out of it. Don’t use oil, lotions, or rose petals; just get in there and go for it.
  25. Text: “Thinking of you” at some point during the day. Follow it up an hour later with a funny aubergine-peach emoji combo or something if sexting is your thing.
  26. Make breakfast for her. Coffee, too.
  27. Handwrite a message on a card. Put some thought into it.
  28. Go running with her. Or participate in a streaming yoga class. Whatever her exercise thing is, do it with her.
  29. Look at old pictures from when you were dating or newly married. Fondly reminisce.
  30. Compliment her in public. Make sure other people hear.
  31. Do something special for her on social media if that’s your thing. Make it funny. Heartfelt.
  32. Find the best scribble your kid made at school and present it nicely to her.
  33. Make some PokéMOM cards for her with the kids. They’re like Pokemon cards but each one should have a picture of your wife and a special skill she possesses that you and your kids love.
  34. Whisper something sweet to her.
  35. Get her a gift that will last a long time. Think guitar lessons, not chocolate.
  36. Take a half-day from work and do something fun together. The best way to surprise someone is to really surprise them — by sacrificing work time for her.
  37. Organize and clean up your space. It’s a gift for everyone — but especially her.
  38. Frame a picture of her with the kids. Tell her why you wanted to frame it.
  39. Find her shopping list, to-do list, or Google calendar and add silly, romantic things to it.
  40. Give her some interruption-free time to binge-watch/marathon a TV show.
  41. Make out with her.
  42. Go for a walk together.
  43. Send her a nice text that includes your feelings. Not just a string of dumb emojis.
  44. Buy her a really dope bath bomb.
  45. Teach the kids to sing a classic love song she likes. Sure, it’s probably easier to have them make an “I Love You This Much” card, but a song and dance? That’s a next-level effort.
  46. Turn off the television for one night.
  47. Give her the last bite of dessert. And the first.
  48. Shave. Or just clean up your beard. Important: Clean all the small hairs from the bathroom when you’re done.
  49. Light a ridiculous amount of candles.
  50. Burn your cargo shorts or whatever piece of clothing she hates. Yes, in front of her.
  51. Have the kids surprise her with flowers at work.
  52. Make coffee before she asks.
  53. Get her car oil changed.
  54. Go to the fancy grocery store for dinner stuff. Make a fancy dinner.
  55. Do that thing she loves but you hate.
  56. Make her any meal with care. Does she love sandwiches? Make the dopest sandwich.
  57. Draw her a bath. Add some bubbles. Fancy soap is nice, too. Let her enjoy it in peace.
  58. Open up a nice, special-occasion bottle of wine.
  59. Write her a note. An actual note, in a card and put some feeling into it.
  60. Post an album on Facebook or an Instagram story with a picture from each year you’ve been together.
  61. Clean and vacuum all the kid crap from the car. The Goldfish crumbs, the fruit snacks wrappers — all of it. Make it spotless.
  62. Dress the kids up.
  63. Let her pick the movie (and the movie snack).
  64. Ask about her day. Then listen to the details. All of them. Then do the same. Share.
  65. Make a heart-shaped memory for every month (or year) you’ve loved her. To each, add a concrete reason you love her: “For the day you gave birth to our child,” “For helping me become a better person,” “Because your booty is a masterpiece.”
  66. Hire a masseuse to come to the house.
  67. Or give her a massage your self.
  68. Go for a walk around the neighborhood. Hold hands.
  69. Light a candle for every year you’ve loved her. She’s the light of your life. Get it?
  70. Throw a family dance night, but only with songs, she likes.
  71. Create a simple movie from your photos.
  72. Play a board game together after the kids go to bed.
  73. Buy her a gift certificate to her favorite clothing store. Don’t buy her lingerie or other clothing. That is hard. You will fail.
  74. Read a book aloud together.
  75. Don’t work late.
  76. Slow dance with her in the living room. To a classic love song. Something like this.
  77. Buy her a book you think she’d love. Tell her why you’d think she’d love it. Write a few notes in the margins. Underline some of your favorite passages.
  78. Have a glass of wine or her favorite cocktail-ready at the end of the day.
  79. Go on a picnic in the backyard. Buy some bread. Buy some fruit. Buy some dope-ass cheese.
  80. Change the background picture on her phone or tablet to one of you together.
  81. Play footsie with her.
  82. Wear the shirt in your closet she likes the most. Yeah, even if it’s that one.
  83. Insist that you both eat dinner at an actual table, not in front of the television. Talk.
  84. Fill a box with nostalgic candy from her childhood.
  85. Plan a romantic getaway in your backyard.
  86. Be her secret helper.
  87. Draw her a picture. Put some effort into it.
  88. Write her a love letter. The kind you would write if you were teenagers in the 80’s.
  89. Learn how to do her favorite hairstyle and help her with it.
  90. Smile and tell her how glad you are you married her.