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So Go Fly A Kite

Feds Want You To Register Your Kid’s Drone Before Christmas Unleashes New Fleets

With Halloween right around the corner, Christmas is right around the other corner, which means you’ve probably begun stockpiling disposable income to purchase a bunch of crap your kids don’t need just to assure they can have the best holiday ever and grow up emotionally well adjusted. But there’s one popular toy for 2015 you might want to keep off your kids’ list, lest you end up with a bunch federal paperwork and potentially land your family a spot on a terrorist watch list.

Yesterday, the Department of Transportation and the Federal Aviation Administration announced that they are looking into making all drone pilots register their aircraft before flying them anywhere in the U.S. These 2 agencies are fed (heh) up with unmanned aircrafts interfering with commercial flights and local cop copters, so it’s hard to blame them for creating a task force to sort out all of the details by November 20, a month before droves of quadcopter-crazed kids terrorize neighbors undressing near windows everywhere.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m–zhiiCl3Y expand=1]

It’s possible these regulations could apply to every drone, whether it’s a quadcopter, glorified toy helicopter, or part of a “My First Commercial Aircraft Disruption” kit. As Wired points out, traditionally, all aircraft were free to operate up to 600 feet above ground. But, like China building an island from nothing and warning U.S. planes overhead to piss off, our own fear of drones could change how the U.S. views its airspace.

One potential pitfall becomes figuring out what actually constitutes a drone. For instance, model airplanes have gotten by without registration; Will they be affected? What about those “LED flying umbrellas” that street peddlers always rocket into the sky for tourists (while someone picks your pockets)? They might not be dangerous, but they sure are annoying. For now, if your kid wants to fly but you want to keep the federal government out of your life, do it the old fashioned way, by flinging them into the pool.

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