Baseball season is almost here, which means peanuts, cracker jacks, and, thanks to Jessica Alba, the opportunity to have your baby take a literal shit all over your most hated rival. Or at least their logo.
The actress announced that Honest Company, which she co-founded, is teaming up with the MLB to launch “Born A Fan” line of diapers for Target. And while the idea behind the product seems to be showing unwavering loyalty to your favorite team by purchasing their diaper for your kid, it’s pretty obvious the best way to do that is having your kid wear a diaper of the team you hate with every fiber of your being. Because if you’re from Boston, the idea of having your kid poop all over a Yankees logo is almost as beautiful as Jason Varitek smashing his glove into Alex Rodriguez’s stupid face
Right now, you can only purchase diapers with logos of six major league teams: the Chicago Cubs, Boston Red Sox, Los Angeles Dodgers, New York Yankees, San Francisco Giants and St. Louis Cardinals. Hopefully, this will change, as fans of all teams deserve the chance to take part in this amazing new level of shit talking.
But if you are an A’s fan who’s disappointed to find a Rangers’ diaper isn’t currently available, or a supporter of any of the 24 teams left out of the fun, you can always go the old-fashioned route and buy some team toilet paper instead. Because wiping your ass with a rival logo never gets old.