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57 Funny Jokes for Kids (And Adults Who Like Dumb Jokes)

You can never have too many knee-slappers in your repertoire of bad puns.

Julia Barnes for Fatherly

The best jokes for kids — and we’re talking really funny jokes — are actually fairly hard to invent on the spot. Even the greatest parents among us aren’t nearly as good at making up stupid jokes as we think we are. And, honestly, even on your best day are you really going to come up with the dumbest and also, the funniest and best kids joke of all time?

What makes the best kids’ jokes really funny? Well, it doesn’t have to be the best joke ever — for adults — but instead, just be funny-ish and it doubles down on being silly more than being clever. In fact, good jokes for kids celebrate and revel in silliness over intelligence. Which is what makes these kinds of jokes appealing to adults, too. A funny kid joke is like ’60s Batman with Adam West: BIFF! POW! PUN!

The best kids’ jokes work by being light-hearted and fun, while also working for adults by being just plain irresistible and awesome. However, because not all of us are Adam West (we’re probably all closer to Ben Affleck, Michael Keaton, or, hey, maybe Robert Pattinson!) we need help with the jokes. Here are 57 hilarious knee-slappers that kids will love and adults won’t be able to help but groan at.

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    A: It’s much easier than walking!
  2. Smarter Than a Parrot
    Q: What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?
    A: A spelling bee.
  3. The Hospitalized Banana
    Q: Why did the banana go to the hospital?
    A: He was peeling really bad.
  4. The Friendly Ocean
    Q: How does the ocean say hello?
    A: It waves.
  5. The Fake Noodle
    Q: What do you call a fake noodle?
    A: An im-pasta.
  6. The Problem With Atoms
    Q: Why can’t you trust atoms?
    A: They make up everything.
  7. Plate Whisperer
    Q: What did one plate whisper to the other plate?
    A: Dinner is on me.
  8. Why Dogs Can’t Dance
    Q: Why aren’t dogs good dancers?
    A: They have two left feet?
  9. Again Snowman
    Q: What do you call an old snowman?
    A: Water.
  10. The Imprisoned Picture
    Q: Why was the picture sent to jail?
    A: It was framed.
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    Q: How do you get a tissue to dance?
    A: You put a boogie in it.
  12. Baseball Hero
    Q: Which superhero hits the most home runs?
    A: Batman.
  13. It Has Wheels and Flies
    Q: What has four wheels and flies?
    A: A garbage truck.
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    A: Because it’s full of fans!
  15. Strongest Days of the Week
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  17. Rich Elves
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    A: Welfy.
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    Q: How do you talk to giants?
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    A: A stick.
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    A: Micro-waves.
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    Q: What do you call cheese that’s not your cheese?
    A: Nacho cheese.
  23. Artichoke Fatality
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    A: You strangle it.
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    A: Because it saw the salad dressing.
  25. The Cool ’Shrooms
    Q: Why do mushrooms get invited to all the parties?
    A: Because they’re such fungis!
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    A: To make up for his miserable summer.
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    A: He didn’t have any guts.
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    Q: Which hand is better to write with?
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    A: Because of all its problems.
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    A: No, you should just stick with turkey.
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    A: Tu-lips.
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    Q: How do you stop a bull from charging?
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    Q: What do you call a pile of cats?
    A: A meow-tain.
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  38. Pregnant Bed Bug
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    A: She’s going to have her baby in the spring.
  39. Sensitive Burglar
    Q: Why was the burglar so sensitive?
    A: He takes things personally.
  40. The Population of Ireland
    Q: Did you hear about the population of Ireland?
    A: It’s Dublin.
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    Q: Why did the bicycle fall over?
    A: It was two tired.
  42. Mummy Music
    Q: What kind of music do mummies listen to?
    A: Wrap music.
  43. No Eye Fish
    Q: What do you call a fish with no eye?
    A: Fssshh.
  44. The Cool Shark
    Q: What do sharks say when something cool happens?
    A: Jawesome!
  45. The Butcher Accident
    Q: What happened when the butcher backed into his meat grinder?
    A: He got a little behind in his work.
  46. The Wet Sand
    Q: Why was the sand wet?
    A: Because the sea weed.
  47. The Rubber Toe
    Q: What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
    A: Roberto.
  48. Nosy Pepper
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    A: Jalapeno business!
  49. Vampire Insomnia
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    A: Because of his coffin!
  50. The Driving Dino
    Q: What do you call a dinosaur that crashes his car?
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  51. The Shy Farts
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    A: A private tutor.
  52. The Virtues of Switzerland
    Q: What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
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    A: Because every play has a cast.
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  55. The Bottom of the Sea
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    A: A Labracadabrador.
  57. Like a Parrot
    Q: What’s orange and sounds like a parrot.
    A: A carrot.
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    A: Ghoul-ade!
  59. Cold vampires
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    A: Frost-bite!
  60. Tooth Time
    Q: What time is it when you have to go to the dentist?
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