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This Nine-Year-Old Wrote a Scathing Letter to the Tooth Fairy After He Forgot to Collect Her Tooth

This should have ended with "You'll be hearing from my lawyer."

reddit

Kids tend to be honest, meaning they don’t have a problem telling people all the ways that they came up short. It’s not to be mean. It’s usually just a byproduct of the fact that they often have a hard time not saying exactly what they feel. In a stunning example of their candor, the internet is in stitches after reading a nine-year-old girl’s strongly worded letter to the tooth fairy about having received no payment despite leaving the tooth underneath her pillow two nights in a row.

It’s not like the tooth fairy and Jennifer, the girl who authored the angry letter, entered into some legally binding arrangement, but when you read the letter, that fact sounds like it’s a little lost on the nine-year-old.

“(Not very) Dear T. F.,

This is the second time you’ve done this. You forgot me. So if you’re not going to come, then I’m going to keep my own teeth. You are through collecting teeth. From Jennifer. From now on I’m keeping my own teeth.

Unsincerely, Jennifer E.

P.S. Keep collecting from Mike, though. Obviously you like him better.

P.P.S. Don’t bother to write back.”

Who is Mike? Is picking up his teeth and not hers a breach of contract? Can she just fire the tooth fairy like that? How does she have that power? Honestly, it doesn’t sound like it matters because, after a slight like this, Jennifer was clearly upset and in the thick of some trust issues.

What may be the best thing about this letter is the fact that it demonstrates how kids think similarly across generations. Jennifer’s letter was actually written in 1991 and she just posted in now.

“My dad found the passive aggressive note that I wrote to the tooth fairy,” she said in her original Reddit post.

Not only is it funny to watch little kids see the world in common ways, but once you find out that she was actually in the midst of deducing that there was no tooth fairy, the whole thing just gets funnier. Apparently, Jennifer had lost the tooth and chosen to not say anything about it for two days. After receiving no money, she knew she was being duped, just not by who exactly.