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‘Sonic the Hedgehog’ Rivals Will Smith’s Genie For Weirdest New Kids’ Movie

Will the coin-collecting super speedster avoid the failure that has plagued previous video game adaptations?

Look out, Genie! There’s a new beloved blue character from the 90s making the leap from animation to live-action in order to retroactively destroy your childhood and his name is Sonic the Hedgehog.

In the trailer, Sonic (voiced by Ben Schwartz) is shown to be getting himself into all sorts of mischief due to his affinity for running super duper fast. He’s eventually tracked down by Sheriff Tom Wachowski (played by James Marsden), who ends up protecting the blue hedgehog after discovering that he is here to save the world, presumably from the evil Dr. Robotnik (played by a mustachioed Jim Carrey).

There’s a lot to dislike about the trailer (including shoehorning in the word “basic” in a hilariously awkward attempt to seem hip and relevant) but it’s hard to get past the fact that Sonic looks really fucking weird in the real world. Also, it looks like most people online think the trailer looks crazy.

In the video game, Sonic doesn’t really look like a hedgehog at all, which clearly worked to his advantage, as he became the most popular video game character of all time not named Mario. But here, he looks too much real hedgehog while simultaneously looking nothing like a hedgehog (why are his legs such a weird length?!?!), which results in an unsettling viewing experience. Let’s just hope Tails doesn’t show up to annihilate our fond childhood memories beyond repair.

Let’s also not ignore the fact that video game adaptations are almost always a trainwreck, including the infamous live-action Super Mario Bros movie which Bob Hoskins, who played the titular plumber, described as “the worst thing I ever did.”

The one bright spot in the trailer? Jim Carrey looks like he is fully going for it as Robotnik, as he delivers his lines with an over-the-top energy that feels like a throwback to the decade when he and Sonic were both at their apex of popularity.

Sonic the Hedgehog races to theaters November 8, 2019.