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Grandparents Bribing Their Kids Over The Baby’s Name Is Now A Thing

Selling your baby’s naming rights off like some common NFL stadium might seem tacky, but if all the bidders are in your immediate family, that’s not as bad, right? Over the weekend, the New York Times looked into the growing phenomenon of grandparents who make their voices heard on baby names using tactics more befitting of a Washington lobbyist than a next of kin.

“For thousands of years, choosing a family name was really how it was done,” Linda Murray, editor in chief of BabyCenter told the NYT. “Now parents are really trying to choose a name that is unique, that suits their child and that says something about their personality.” To fight this trend, members of older, more traditional generations are fighting back with something many expecting millennials lack: money. The Times cites examples of the parents of future parents offering up everything from a dream wedding to $10,000 cold hard cash to get their grandchildren named after them.Of course, it’s not like your elders are free of blame in this whole predicament. Maybe if they’d done a better job naming their children for the past dozen generations or so, this wouldn’t even be a discussion. Seriously? Herbert? You call that a name? It sounds like some sort of feminist frozen dessert.