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Good News: Your Kid Isn’t A Werewolf Even If They Can’t Sleep During A Full Moon

If you’ve ever rolled your eyes in response to your spouse blaming her mood on the fact that mercury is in retrograde, you might be less than pleased to learn that the lunar cycle might be why your kid sucks at sleep, too. A new cross-sectional study of 5,812 children ages 9 to 11 spanning 12 countries (including the U.S.) suggests that the full moon might be a terrible babysitter, but you hopefully knew that already.

The report, aptly titled “Are Children Like Werewolves?”, was published in the journalFrontiers In Pediatrics and looked at how the kids slept during new moon, half moon, and full moon. On average, kids got 5 minutes less sleep during a full moon than they got during a new moon — which means you probably got 5 minutes less sleep (your wife needed it more anyway). The reason for this might be that they take after you, as a separate study found that you get 20 to 25 minutes less sleep during a full moon. At least you both have someone to watch cartoons with now.

THE WEST WING

Fatherly IQ
  1. How stressful do you find days when your kids can't go outside?
    Not stressful at all. We make the best of it
    Sometimes they are, sometimes they aren’t. Depends on the circumstance.
    Extremely stressful. It’s hard to entertain them
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The good news is that other than losing 5 minutes of sleep, the moon cycles had no impact on children’s behavior (if only the same could be said about your wife). Researchers suspect that this phenomena has less to do with kids being supernatural creatures, and more to do with a full moon being the brightest of any lunar cycle. It’s probably a relief to learn that your kid has no lycanthropic tendencies; unfortunately, it appears you’ll have to look elsewhere for an explanation on why they occasionally howl at the moon.

[H/T] Van Winkles