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Caffeinated Peanut Butter Is Such An Awesome Idea The FDA May Investigate It

Today in great ideas for parents that are simultaneously horrible ideas for kids: Caffeinated peanut butter. STEEM Peanut Butter promises to fuel you like coffee without the crash, because its combination of proteins and fat make the stomach digest it slower while the buzz lasts longer. “How about having enough energy to finish that backyard project in one day instead of putting it off for another weekend?” STEEM wants to know. Who could argue with that?

New York Senator Chuck Schumer, for one. He’s taking issue with just how concentrated the stuff is and, with 1,200 mg of caffeine in one jar (that’s 2 cups of coffee for every 2 tablespoons), Schumer has a point. No matter how awesome STEEM might make your morning smoothie, you probably don’t have to think long about the ramifications of the stuff accidentally making it into your kid’s lunch before you receive a much less pleasant jolt.

While coffee’s health benefits for adults seem to increase with every new study, no one’s arguing for caffeine in kids’ diets (except maybe the Italians), where it’s known to be like acid for their developing brains, calcium absorption, and overall growth. Schumer wants the FDA to investigate the use of caffeine in snack foods; in the meantime, maybe stick to your regular cup of Joe. And if you insist on giving STEEM a try, keep it wherever you keep the other stuff you absolutely, positively don’t want your kids consuming.