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Elementary School Kids Ask Hilariously Bizarre Questions About Sex

One teacher recently tweeted a few gems.

@kimyoogyeom Fatherly Illustration

Every parent knows that kids blurt out funny things. But when one elementary school teacher recently posted a tweet full of questions that her students asked about sex, it raised the idea that “kids say the darndest things” to a new level of hilarity.  

Unlike the sex-ed classes of your youth, which were more often than not a proving ground for people’s immature jokes or a space to awkwardly dance around real questions kids were too afraid to ask in front of their peers, this generation of grade schoolers doesn’t mince words. Here’s a sampling of their inquiries:

“If you intercourse longer, is the baby born bigger?”

“When the PENISE is put into the VIRGINIA, does it slide in quietly or click like a key in a lock?”

“I’m sure my mother never had anything to do with intercoursing…maybe my father?”

“Wouldn’t it be good if the boy just had the baby for a change?

Are you sure somebody knows how to get that baby out of there?

And the question that takes the cake is actually hilarious in the way that it grossly overestimates reality. 

“I know that intercousing takes 24 hours, My question is how do you stay awake?”