When it comes to relationship disagreements, parting ways over how to discipline your kids hits the motherlode of psychological trigger points. Baggage from how both of you were raised; suspicions about what the other does when you’re not around, your combined insecurities about how good a job you’re doing as parents – it’s a tinder box. But there are actual best practices for how you can have disagreement productively, from how you enter into the conversation (be open minded, don’t be a dick) to where you keep your focus (on the kid, duh). Here are a few more tips from the Gottman Institute’s Dr. Don Cole, who’s paid to sort out exactly these kinds of disputes between partners. He can help you find the middle ground, which should have just enough room in it for a time out corner.