Maintaining desire with someone you plan to spend the rest of your life with is such a vexing challenge that when couples therapist Esther Perel gave a TED Talk on the topic in 2013, it was viewed over 6 million times. Perel’s new TED Talk just went live, and this time she’s tackling an issue even thornier for married or otherwise committed partners: infidelity.
Perel has been interviewing the unfaithful for over a decade, gaining uncommon insights about what it means to “cheat” in a world with internet porn, Tinder, Snapchat, and polyamory. When the definition of fidelity is this dependent on context, the definition of infidelity varies from couple to couple — and even partner to partner. Do you know what your partner considers cheating?
Do you know what your partner considers cheating?
The talk isn’t 20 minutes of fear mongering about the state of romantic commitment in 2015. Rather, it’s a candid exploration of all the challenges those commitments face and how couples can not only meet them but thrive in spite of them. If you’re part of the blissful minority whose eyes have never wandered or who never once doubted their partner, there’s nothing to see here — everyone else should press “play.”
[ted http://www.ted.com/talks/esther_perel_rethinking_infidelity_a_talk_for_anyone_who_has_ever_loved#t-1195841 expand=1]