The old saying goes, you trust your spouse as far as you can throw them, but the new saying? Don’t do that. The happy medium is competitively carrying them, a practice wives have been trusting husbands enough to allow for nearly 2 decades now, both on a national and international level.
This weekend marked the 17th Annual North American Wife Carrying Championship, a competition with surprisingly detailed rules but no weight requirement, because after 17 years they know better than to bring that up again. The practice comes from a Finnish tradition known as Eukonkanto, which roughly translates to “please put me down.” It is based on the 19th-century legend of “Ronkainen The Robber” and his training methods for teaching thieves to steal food and women from neighboring villages; their partners probably weren’t thrilled about the sport then, either.
Today, instead of winning a life of crime, the fastest duo takes home the winning wife’s weight in beer and 5 times that in cash. This year, that meant Elliot and Giana Storey took home 11 cases of Goose Island Oktoberfest, $665, and, most importantly, a spot in the World Wife Carrying Championship in Finland next summer. If that incentive has you primed to carry your team to glory in next year’s event, check out their instructional video to learn how to wear your wife like a cape … “a lady cape.” Not that you should need the help. You’ve been training for this since the third date — fifth if your in-laws are asking.
[H/T] Sunday River