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This Is A Perfect Example Of Why You Might Sometimes Want To Lie To Your Kid

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What lies do you tell your children to make your life easier?

Most of the time I try to be honest with my daughter. Sometimes, however, it’s just easier to lie or omit truths because she isn’t old enough to understand them.

Sometimes I lie because I’m selfish. Those usually end up backfiring on me.

Several months ago my husband went on a business trip and brought me back a bag of Lindt chocolates. Some of them were “grown-up chocolates,” filled with liquor. The rest were just flat-out delicious and I didn’t want to share.

My daughter, a bright and inquisitive 4-year-old, had her own candy, anyway.

One evening I tried to stuff one of the chocolates into my mouth when she was in another room. She raced into the kitchen as soon as she heard the crinkle of the wrapper. She caught me with my mouth full and asked what I had.

“Nothing…”

She sniffed the air, then squealed, “Is that candy?!!”

“You wouldn’t like it,” I lied.

“But I do like chocolate!”

“Yeah, well, this is chocolate covered broccoli.”

“I like broccoli!”

“Um. I mean, it’s a chocolate covered brussels sprout, so…”

Her face fell.

Sometimes I lie because I’m selfish. Those usually end up backfiring on me.

The one time she tried a brussels sprout she gagged and dry heaved through the rest of dinner.

And all she did was lick it.

My stash was safe.

A couple weeks later, as I leaned into the freezer at the grocery store to grab a bag of broccoli, she told me she loved brussels sprouts and that I should make them for dinner instead. I shrugged and snagged a bag.

Later, I carefully placed the bag in the microwave, This Side Up, and served them with dinner.

Much to my surprise, the first thing she reached for on her plate was one of those little green balls. She bit off half of it and started chewing.

“Mmmm …” she said as she gagged and tried to swallow the vegetable sliver. “That’s yummy!” She rubbed her tummy and grimaced.

My husband and I held our glasses over our mouths as we tried to stifle our laughter.

The chocolates were already gone at that point and she never mentioned them, but every time we have brussels sprouts for dinner she gags down at least part of one and exclaims that they’re her favorite.

I guess next time I’ll have to share.

Or eat them when she’s in bed.

Michelle Hozey is the stay-at-home mom of a 4-year-old. Read more from Quora below:

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