There is no shortage of online literature about sex during pregnancy. Unfortunately, most of it consists of descriptions of sexual positions you already know and/or decidedly unsexy stock photography. Or fortunately, if that’s your thing. You do you, bud. If you just want a better understanding of how the biological and psychological shifts your partner undergoes directly impact your sex life, here is your thing:
The fine folks at the enticingly named GoodInBed.com have put together this comprehensive guide to all things pregger sex, which isn’t yet a hashtag, so maybe do the honors. A few points of note:
- No, you won’t hurt the baby: It’s very flattering of yourself to think so highly of yourself, but your kid has, like, 3 layers of protection in there — the strong muscles of the uterus, the amniotic sac and fluid, and the thick mucus plug that blocks the cervix. Other than that, though, you’re totally huge enough to inflict some damage.
- It’s actually quite comfortable: Once you guys get past the nausea, fatigue, and general stress in the earlygoing of pregnancy, there are a few adjustments you can make and best positions you can try (think anything that keeps pressure off her back and belly), that make for fantastic sexytime.
- You may have to abstain: Regardless of mood or libido, some circumstances make sex during pregnancy unsafe. These may include: a history or signs of preterm labor, history of miscarriage, multiple fetuses (twins, triplets), or certain cervical conditions. As always, get the all clear from your doctor before taking to the sea of love.
She’s Not In The Mood … But She Really Should Be
If your partner’s libido dips during pregnancy, it may be due to the increase of estrogen and progesterone in her system, as these hormones are known to depress sexual desire. It’s the same reason that going on the pill sometimes negatively impacts women’s sex drives. In a cruel bit of irony, pregnancy orgasms are actually more intense and pleasurable due to increased blood flow and sensitivity in the genitals. If that fact doesn’t get her in the mood, know that all these effects differ dramatically from woman to woman, and the only real consensus — as with most of these things — is that there’s no “normal.” Thanks for nothing, science.