There’s been a deluge of research in recent years examining the effects stress has on babies, both in utero and in early life. While the results are a little nerveracking (oh, the irony!), there’s one finding that any new parent should take to heart: Young kids don’t need an overabundance of love, as much as they need the reassurance of a safety and security. One expert’s take on this discovery? Parents should embrace their own social lives, because when kids see their parents relaxed enough to leave their kids alone and focus on their friends, kids will relax, too.