If you ever felt like it seemed too good to be true that you could live like Billy Madison while your pregnant spouse had to worry that every single thing she did to her body could negatively impact the kid, researchers at Georgetown University Medical Center have some news for you: It is. While they’re at it, they’d like to point out that the whole “biological clock” thing? You’re carrying one, too.
The report, published in the American Journal of Stem Cells, reviewed human and animal studies about how offspring health is influenced by the age, environmental factors, and alcohol consumption of their fathers. Not only did the data show that 75 percent of infants diagnosed with fetal alcohol spectrum disorder (FASD) had biological fathers who were alcoholics, children could suffer from it even if their mothers never drank. Several additional studies cited found that children of men 40 and older had higher risk of developing schizophrenia and were 5.75 times more likely to have Autism Spectrum Disorders when compared to men 30 and under. That last one in particular might sting, but it’s something women have heard for years.
Despite the decreased risk, if you could travel back in time to have kids in your 20s you probably wouldn’t because, dude, where’s your car? But there are plenty of other factors identified in this report that you can control, such as decreasing alcohol consumption and eating your feelings instead. With all that new responsibility placed on your health, you may as well be getting pregnant, too. At least then people would call you beautiful and let you sit down occasionally.
[H/T] Eureka Alert