If you suspect your kid isn’t going to be the next Mark Zuckerberg, you might consider a more classic fall back career path: becoming a doctor. Though it means more schooling, you know the old adage: “You have to spend money so your kids make money and then share it with you.” But what, exactly, should you encourage your kid to study? Oncology? Pediatrics? Boobs? Lucky for you, Medscape, an extension of WebMD, figured out which doctors made the most money in the 2016 Physician Compensation Report.
Looking at 19,200 doctors across 26 different specialties, the data predictably showed a pay gap between men and women, because gender equality remains something at which the U.S. still sucks. The highest paid doctors overall were orthopedists who earned $443,000 annually, followed by cardiologists who made $410,000, and dermatologists who brought home $381,000. Although the average specialty doctor makes more than the average primary care doctor, certain specialty fields made up the bottom of the list, including pediatricians who earned the least out of all doctors. That could be a result of the declining birth rate, or the overhead associated with keeping their offices stocked with Highlights magazines. Either way, make sure to tip yours the next time you’re there.
Though gender and geography both play a part in the disparity in salaries, you might be able to blame the old people for the differences in income as well. In the past year the pay for internists (doctors of chronic conditions) went up, possibly because thousands of baby boomers also turned 65 this year and suddenly have to pee a lot. So, in a sense aging does pay, you’re just not the one getting the check. And if it can’t be you, it might as well be your kid.