Whether it’s a soccer ball, a snowball, or the two balls between their legs, fathers have a mixed track record. For every guy having an innocent catch in the backyard, there’s another guy stepping on his own progeny to catch a flyball at a game. For every guy showing his kid the finer points of dribbling, there’s another guy showboating straight to his poor kid’s face. And the less said about the daily curse of nut shots endured by all fathers of toddlers, the better. If there’s a takeaway from this list, it’s that you should have one of these when your kid’s an infant, and once they start walking on their own, just start wearing a cup until they go to college.
First off, look alive kid. When your father is kicking around a giant soccer ball, you shouldn’t be lollygagging on the ground — hands up, ready position. Second, pops, maybe save the brilliant screen plays for the beer league and not your toddlers.
Nice work, guy. Not only did you fail to make the one-handed catch, you just concussed your kid. You’re awarded no points and may God — and God-awful tacky faux hawk guy — have mercy on your soul.
What? Like you’ve never wanted to hit your whining kid upside the head with a snowball? And the execution is perfect: That lower back shot ensures the kid won’t get snow down his neck, and he sends him straight into soft, fluffy powder. Ten points for you, dad.
Sure, this guy is a repeat from the last list of hilarious dad-related GIFs you saw, but with this kind of tot-crushing form, are you really complaining? He has it all — perfect form, technical ability, and laser-guided aim. You cannot injure your own son better than this.
Proof that little kids don’t care if the nuts in question are the ones responsible for their own existence or just your garden variety, World Series MVP nuts — they’re still aiming right for them. Go Sox!
Sorry, dad, but your daughters heard you talking to their mother about how you want them to have a baby brother and they’re seriously not into it.
What are the odds that the guy in the white t-shirt is that kid’s dad? Ultimately, it doesn’t really matter which of those 3 guys is most culpable in traumatizing the kid; either way he’s definitely growing up a basketball fan.
2007 Snowball Dad should take a few tips from OG Snowball Dad a few GIFs back. First, don’t use the roadside snow that’s crusted over in ice and peppered with rocks and debris. Second, definitely don’t drop it on your kid when they have nothing to fall on but pavement. Third, why the hell are you trying to kick your kid at the same time?