When And How To Tell People You’re Pregnant
In the era of “Pics or it didn’t happen,” you might be tempted to announce your baby-making success to the internet as loudly and early as possible. However, this isn’t that dope-ass sandwich you made for lunch (13 likes!). This is your future child, and the announcement of their impending arrival carries with it implications of hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and overall bad juju. There’s no right or wrong way to divulge that you’re expecting (okay, maybe there’s a wrong way), but there are some easy-to-follow guidelines that’ll ensure you tell the right people at the right time.
How Long To Wait
Tradition states that the end of the first trimester (10-13 weeks) is typically the time to divulge pregnancy news. That’s when the risk of miscarriage takes a major dip, most women start to show, and you have that sweet 12-week scan photo handy to show Grandma.
The argument for revealing the news earlier is that you’ll have the support of those closest to you nearly from the jump, which is especially nice for you if that includes another dad who’s been through it. If complications do arise, your support system is waiting in the wings to pick you up.
Who To Tell (And When)GIPHY
Everyone loves a good baby announcement, but not all friends or family are created equal. You should have learned this lesson with your wedding guest list (A Team is anyone you’ll want to have photos of in 20 years, B Team is anyone you only want around when the venue is about to screw you on the minimum headcount), but if not, use this simple, straightforward, mostly fiasco-free plan from Peter Hartlaub of the SF Gate. He told a very close dad friend early on, then immediate family as a group around 12 weeks, then extended but close family (the ones you don’t mind drinking with at Thanksgiving), then friends, then the entire internet — last, and very much least.
The most important person not on that list: your boss, who you should probably tell as soon as you have a chance and are comfortable. If you’re going to need time covered at work, 6 months isn’t a ton of time to lock things down — or get your company’s parental leave policy rewritten — so it’s good to get those worries off your plate. You also might have questions about how your dahood will affect your insurance.
The key to the big reveal is to manage the information so people who will really care get the news in person and well ahead of your Instagram followers. After all your dope-ass sandwich pics, they’re already used to ignoring you posting about putting a bun in the oven anyway.