kobi-cleaning-robot
I, Gardener

This Robot Will Do All Of Your Yard Work, And Won’t Even Complain About It

For as much as you hate mowing the lawn and shoveling snow, nobody in your house is green-lighting a professional landscaper (or even the high-school kid next door) to do it for you anytime soon. But what if you could hire somebody to do all the yard work, for free, and they didn’t complain nearly as much as you do about how hot it is outside? Your wife could get behind that, right? Well … say hello to Kobi, your new live-in robot gardener.

Kobi Robot
Kobi is a fully autonomous landscaping ‘bot that mows the lawn, rakes the leaves, and shovels the snow. (Whether he can also knock down 3s for your church basketball team is anybody’s guess.) After driving him around the perimeter of your manor using the smartphone app and pointing out any obstacles to avoid, Kobi remembers the lay of the land and relies on a combo of “high-end GPS and sensors to achieve inch-level positioning accuracy.” No perimeter wires required. No W-9 to fill out. No chance of “accidentally” not reporting him on your taxes.

From there, you can literally turn him loose and get back to watching football. Or even playing with the kids. Assuming the correct tool is attached (mower, leaf or snow blower), Kobi knows when to punch his own clock. With the lawn, he cuts (and mulches) frequently so it never grows tall enough for the neighbors to complain. For snow, he wirelessly tracks the weather forecast and begins blowing shortly after the white stuff starts to fall. He’ll work through the entire storm at 2 MPH, taking breaks to charge his lithium ion battery while waiting for fresh snow to accumulate. Apparently, you can even use the app to give him constructive criticism if he’s not doing a great job, and he won’t even make jokes behind your back to the other landscapers.

Kobi Robot
As you can imagine, once the aforementioned neighbors meet Kobi they’re likely to want to steal him and/or at least stare at him longingly in a creepy way. Don’t worry, Kobi will never feel uncomfortable. Also, he’s equipped with anti-theft detection and will let out an “ear-piercing alarm” (plus fire a warning notification to your smartphone) if somebody tries to lure him off your property. If somehow they’re successful, he’s pin-protected (and very loyal) and automatically goes on strike/into disable mode, “rendering it useless for everyone else but you.”

The only problem with Kobi appears to be, other than he takes too many shots and doesn’t get his teammates more involved, is that he’s not yet available. So while you can put an order in today, you should still plan on shoveling snow this winter. Sorry.
Kobi Robot ($4,000, Available for Pre-Order)