This week in “If it ain’t broke, connect it to the Internet and call it ‘Smart:'” peeing on a stick! Last week at CES, First Response announced plans to introduce the first bluetooth pregnancy test this spring. Finally, your wife can ask Siri if she’s pregnant without getting back, “I hardly know you.” Siri, you minx you.
The First Response Pregnancy Pro Digital Test & App doesn’t change the process, just connects it to your phone. Unwrapping the stick activates it, and pressing a button pairs it with the app, which confirms that the test is working properly and provides directions.
After that, it’s business as usual, except instead of nervously counting bathroom tiles or flipping through a 6-month-old Entertainment Weekly, the user enjoys real-time updates and engaging content. During the 3-minute wait period, the app reassures that an adequate sample has been provided. Buttons offer options of “Educate Me,” “Calm Me,” or “Entertain Me” and link to fertility information, soothing music and breathing techniques, or Buzzfeed lists of cat gifs, respectively, because the Internet Of Things is, after all, still the Internet.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLL5sl8Y3u8 expand=1]
To protect privacy, results only display after entering a passcode. Results appear beside relevant next steps like estimating due date and scheduling doctor’s appointments or fertility tips and cycle tracking, depending.
The smart test will cost $15-$22 (companion app access is free), versus around $10 for a pair of analog sticks. A slightly higher price, but a small one to pay for the possibility that one of your friends will try peeing on their phone after hearing about your futuristic bluetooth pregnancy test.