By your sixth anniversary, you’re getting to be an old hat at both remembering (thanks Siri) and gift-giving. But even while you and the missus (or mister) are settling into the routine of spending the rest of your natural lives — and part of eternity — together, you still forget that every anniversary year has a corresponding theme. It’s time to pick an appropriate anniversary gift.
Once again you have to decide between traditional versus modern gifts. And once again, why not make it easy on yourself? Here is the thoughtful, yet easy-to-use, anniversary gift guide that will help you mark the occasion the right way. Because pulling out a bottle of vodka and a pair of furry handcuffs — that’s usually the wrong way.
Year 6 Anniversary Gifts
Traditional: Iron / Le Creuset Dutch Oven
Finally, a Dutch oven your spouse can use, not the one that she fears every night when she pulls back the sheets. Le Creuset has a new luxe line of gold knobbed oval Dutch ovens that will turn out soups, stews, and braised meats like Jacques Pepin. Sure, it may not be the kind of gold that she was expecting, but when your sixth anniversary calls for “iron,” don’t be the guy that actually goes out and gets her an iron.
Modern: Wood / Elm Hill Farm Cedar Porch Swing
After you’re done high-fiving all those invisible friends about how you’re getting your wife “wood” this year, invest in a romantic gesture that you both can use. This porch swing is made out of solid, rot-resistant Northern White cedar and hand-crafted out there on Elm Hill Farm in Vermont. Features includes both back and forth motion, high-quality hanging chains, and rustic ergonomic posture. Pro tip: She won’t find jokes about how you’re now “swingers” funny either.
Year 7 Anniversary Gifts
Traditional: Copper / Bodum Copper French Press
Your Mr. Coffee pot is about as aesthetically pleasing as North Korean architecture. Why not dress up the morning ritual with a copper French press that nods to famous designer and woman-about-Paris, Eileen Gray? Like all Bodum presses, it uses a 3-piece mesh filter to catch those coarse grounds and holds 34 ozs of coffee — or about one parent-sized serving.
Modern: Desk Sets / Grovemade
A desk set doesn’t exactly make anyone hot, but you don’t make the anniversary etiquette rules, do you? If you’re going to get your family business partner something they can stick all of their pins, clips, and pens into, make it count. Grovemade creates gorgeous walnut and maple laptop stands, mouse pads, keyboard trays, and iPhone docks. So beautiful, there’s a slight chance your spouse may just shove all of it off the desk with a swipe of their arm and have you right there. (Note: It’s a really slight chance.)
Year 8 Anniversary Gifts
Traditional: Bronze / Minoux Spartan Bracelet
Handcrafted in Portland, OR, the Spartan bracelet is made out of solid bronze, bringing to mind both its minimalist style and Gerard Butler — which could be to your advantage. Tell her that Minoux also uses environmentally-friendly practices like using recycled metals, so theoretically this bracelet could be made from the shield of the ancient Spartan warrior. (Or just discarded third place Little League trophies.)
Modern: Linen/Lace / MILK Books Photo Album
Just when she thought that she was getting a nighty or some massive doily you crocheted for the couch, you go and pull out a photo album with all of your treasured memories (or at least the PG ones) inside. Choose your paper stock and up to 120 pages of pics, and Milk books hand-binds your album in one of 7 linen fabrics. The result looks and feels like it belongs in a library; one that smells of rich mahogany.
Year 9 Anniversary Gifts
Traditional: Pottery / Porcelain and Stone Harbor Noir Bracelet
Before you get pumped for Color Me Mine, how about you veer slightly left and get “pottery” that she can wear. Porcelain and Stone creates hand-shaped statement bracelets that connect with strong magnet clasps. Get 2, 14 carat gold chains and she can turn her bracelet into a necklace. Just like the artist formerly known as Tity Boy!
Modern: Leather / Clare V. La Tropezienne Bag
Even if you carry your gym clothes around in a garbage bag, at the very least you understand your wife enjoys a high-quality, over-the-shoulder leather carry-all. This anniversary make an effort and give her the La Tropezienne bag from Clare Vivier. It’s crafted from Italian leather and is big enough (17-inches x 12-inches inside) to shove all her crap and your kid’s crap, and still have room left over for your crap — without it looking like crap.
Year 10 Anniversary Gifts
Traditional: Aluminum / Vanmoof Bicycle
There are lots of ways to go with an aluminum anniversary: Baseball bats? Home siding? A tasty baked potato. But if you want to go with a big ticket item that you would kill for too, try a Vanmoof bicycle. It features a lightweight aluminum frame, covered chain, integrated gears (up to 8 speeds), and the best part is that it shows up pretty much ready to ride. Take it for a 30-day test drive. Then exchange it for that baseball bat she was eyeing.
Modern: Diamond Jewelry / Minor Obsessions Black Diamond Bracelet
This 10-carat gold chain sports (because it’s a tennis bracelet, right?) 6 2mm black diamonds. You’d be forgiven if you think that black diamonds are either really steep ski runs or really shitty jewels. The fact is that these are neither. Those diamonds are all natural and known as carbonado. Some scientists even believe that they came to Earth from meteors. So, go ahead and bust out that knowledge if your wife thinks that instead of space, these jewels came from Zales.